Sophia easily let the conversation revolve around Grayson’s particularly regular day. They had fallen into a seemingly normal routine of late dinners on weekdays and talking about nonsense with casual bouts of comfortable silence between chews. Sophia had always pictured herself alone in a large apartment overlooking Manhattan for the rest of her life, her only company being the soft meows of some sort of kitten. Before she’d gotten back together with Grayson she was about to invest in a small white Scottish fold, but of course plans had changed, and the precious feline she’d fondly named Luna was picked up a month later by a new found owner. Instead she traded up, now the owner of a suburban home shared with a husband and his son— to whom she considered her own son as well. Somehow it all made her stomach flutter a little, just like his shining blue eyes did from across the kitchen table.
This was the future she’d always wanted. It never occurred to Sophia that her initial desires wouldn’t be as satisfying as working in a small town high school as a guidance counselor, her husband’s history classroom just right down the hall. It never crossed her mind that she’d be willing to give her life for other teenagers to understand that things happen, and life moves on, and that they were worth so much more than grades and tests and college acceptance letters. She never wondered what it would be like to see a little boy grow up before her eyes, wanting so badly to have a child be biologically hers to groom and pamper as well. Sophia never wanted to be a mother, as she was too scared she would mess up due to lack of experience. She’d had eighteen amazing years with her own mother before she passed away, and somehow that never seemed like enough time to evolve into someone worthy of baring a human life. But with parent meetings and holding crying students against her chest as they poured themselves out to her it changed her mind. She thought that maybe she’d be good at something like this.
After twenty or so minutes the small talk died down for good, evolving into just silence with the occasional humming of the washer and dryer. Sophia took this time to collect their plates and place them in the sink. Her back was facing Grayson, a painful expression contorting her features. She wasn’t exactly sure how to go about this, and decided to just spit it out before she was too scared to say anything at all. “So, I’ve been thinking…” she paused, putting down the sponge and the half cleaned dinner plate to collect her thoughts. “I walked past the playground near the elementary school the other day,” she paused again, purposely leaving out that she had done it multiple times and not on accident. “And there was this little girl— God, she was so cute, Gray!— and she was running around and laughing and… and it made me think of when my mom used to take me to the park on Sunday afternoons. I used to look forward to that every single day.” Sophia fondly smiled to the dish in her hand, rinsing it off before placing it in the washer. “And I thought, y’know, it might be nice to start traditions of our own. They don’t have to involve parks on Sunday afternoons but, like, things that we would do. Opening a gift on Christmas Eve, playing board games on New Years; the small things…” it didn’t take long for her to realize she was rambling and decided to fully face her husband just in time. “I want a family with you, Grayson. And it’s not that I don’t consider Andrew family, because I do. You know I do. I just… something that’s ours— someone that’s ours. Someone with your eyes and my hair and…” Sophia paused to push her hair back. “I want a baby, Gray. I want your baby.”
Dinner passed without anything particularly remarkable happening. They ate and talked about their days, the same kind of casual domesticity he'd grown accustomed to. It was the kind of uneventful evening he loved to have with Sophia, and even when things lapsed into silence it was a comfortable one. Just the way things should be, in his mind. They finished the dishes and moved to the kitchen, Grayson's mind already moving on to consider the homework he was supposed to grade tonight — namely, trying to figure out how to get out of grading it. It wasn't a particularly exciting train of thought, so it was easy enough for Sophia to call his attention back to the present and back to her. Not that it was ever hard for Sophia to distract him. She'd had that kind of pull over him since they were seventeen years old, and it seemed like things had only gotten worse with age. She wasn't facing him as she spoke, and at first Grayson didn't think much of it. While he wasn't particularly sure why Sophia wanted to tell him about walking past an elementary school playground, it wasn't setting off any alarms in his head, good or bad.
She transitioned into talking about traditions, and although Sophia couldn't see his face, Grayson found himself smiling and nodding along. He would love to set up some more traditions, something to last, especially for Andrew's sake. His son seemed to have handled it all more or less gracefully, but he still felt bad that Andrew had had to deal with his parents getting divorced at such a young age, and with switching houses every week, and with Sophia unexpectedly changing their lives. It was a lot of change in a few short years, and it might be good for Andrew if they had more of a semblance of routine for their whole family, even simple things like board games and gifts. Sophia turned around then though, and her next words chased all other thoughts out of his head.
“I want a family with you, Grayson."
It wasn't until she finished with “I want a baby, Gray. I want your baby,” that her words fully registered with him. The one thing he'd been missing from his life with her — a new baby in the family, a brother for Andrew, a child of their very own...she wanted that too? Despite the fact that he'd brought it up with Sophia before, she'd seemed more than just reluctant, and he'd almost assumed it would never happen. He still would've been happy, sure, but he somehow couldn't imagine that life making him as happy as he felt even in this moment. He knew how much better his life had been thanks to Andrew, even from day one, and he couldn't wait to share that with Sophia too. He knew she loved Andrew, a fact he was immensely grateful for, but the more the merrier too, right?
First things first though, before he let himself get too carried away: "Are you sure?" he asked, somehow paranoid that he'd misheard or that she was joking, or just saying it to make him happy. But Sophia nodded, confirming it yet again, and Grayson beamed, mind already jumping ahead to what he was sure was to come: taking their kid to the playground like the little girl in her story, playing board games on New Year's, all the things that Sophia had described and more.
He leaned forward to pull Sophia in for a kiss, still grinning when they separated. "Okay, we're doing this then," he said, resisting the urge to add a juvenile no takesie backsies on the end. He couldn't really be faulted for thoughts like that thought, considering the fact that he was somewhat incredulous that this was actually happening. He knew there were logistics to work out later, something he hadn't actually had to do with Andrew, but he was confident it would be easy for them. "We're gonna have a kid." He couldn't help but laugh, because he was Grayson Handler, and most of his emotions were translated into laughs. Happiness most of all though, and at the moment that's what he was: really and truly and honestly and completely happy and looking forward to the future they were creating together.
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