one-thousand-year-old condescending brat

rachel honestly don't even know what i like anymore. here sporadically! on twitter more, link below.

[maggierogers]

[grangerbutstranger]

anyway this is the real reason I found that other post in my drafts: my friend wrote CARMEN SANDIEGO/MS. FRIZZLE FIC and you should read it

[grangerbutstranger]

[belated] yuletide 2k16 recs

i made this list a million years ago and never posted it? whoops. read these.

fandoms: aristotle & dante discover the secrets of the universe, the black tapes, carol/the price of salt, crazy ex-girlfriend, disney, ghostbusters (2016), the good place, jupiter ascending, lumberjanes, magic mike xxl, pitch, stranger things. absolute faves in bold!

Leave the Light On by novelized 13k T Aristotle & Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe ten years later, ari’s father dies. a different tone from the book, but very much the same ari and dante.

una poca de gracia by Kisatsel 3k T Aristotle & Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe such a good, book-like first person ari voice as he goes back to school after his eventful summer.

A Child’s Path to Clarity by st_aurafina 5k T The Black Tapes richard and alex begin to deal with the realizations of season two. stunningly in keeping with the tone/style/voices of the podcast.

Fever Started Long Ago by Miss_M 3k T Carol/The Price of Salt abby through her years with carol. i loved this.

Snapshots by Emerla 1k G Carol therese’s five favorite photos of carol + carol’s favorite of therese.

Some Places We Went Before We Died by zvi 2k G Carol glimpses of carol and therese’s life together.

Consider the Lilies of the Field, Bro by Nestra 1k G Crazy Ex-Girlfriend a perfectly in character josh chan moves back to west covina and stops by to see his friend father brah.

Josh Doesn't Understand the Intricacies of Texas Hold 'Em! by stillscape 3k G Crazy Ex-Girlfriend greg accidentally reunites with josh and then rebecca. really good greg pov.

Why Is Josh's Friend's Uncle Talking to Me About Vampires? by etothepii 13k T Crazy Ex-Girlfriend rebecca bunch learns she’s a vampire slayer. (the best part's about halfway through and concerns another character, but it’s great)

The Finite Boundaries of the Heart by shiniestqueen (sparrowinsky) 2k G Beauty and the Beast (Disney) belle misses the beast and tries to get used to adam before their wedding. reckons with the questions we all have at the end of the movie with just enough hope.

Unmasked by isabeau 4k T Mulan (Disney) shang pov during mulan. oddly satisfying for a retelling of canon, really good characterization.

Finding Marlin by failsafe 2k G Finding Nemo/Finding Dory wonderfully in character dory pov on her family as nemo starts to grow up.

A Revolution’s Revelation by sheafrotherdon 1k G Ghostbusters patty lectures certain historical ghosts concerned about their portrayal in a certain musical. holtzmann is into it. (so am i.)

A, B, Janet by Kyra 1k G The Good Place mildly jossed glimpse into janet’s reboot process, a lot of fun.

A madeleine is a Madeline is a madeleine by moemachina 10k T The Good Place love love love this. the dialogue feels exactly like the show--it could be an episode--and the eleanor-chidi dynamic is perfect. jossed because they get together, but it’s well worth reading.

The Good Soulmate by randomizer 2k G The Good Place sweet little character study of chidi as he processes his feelings about the two eleanors mid-season.

putting the dog to sleep by Tenillypo 9k E Jupiter Ascending jupiter saves the world through tax law. the worldbuilding works so well here i kept getting mad there were sex scenes instead of more interplanetary politics.

A Badge Idea by burglebezzlement 2k G Lumberjanes injured molly becomes april’s latest badge-earning project. cute friendship fic that reads like the comic.

Regina by Georgina 13k M Magic Mike XXL mike and rome’s early days. rome is great here in the same over-the-top, tongue-in-cheek but still serious way the movie portrays her.

watch the queen conquer by sabrina_il (marina) 1k E Magic Mike XXL rome doesn’t think mike’s as good at sex as he thinks.

When You Slide On Down by justlikethehamptons 3k M Magic Mike XXL how mike met dallas and left rome, with a great mike voice.

Relax (Don’t Do It) by amathela (Zhailei) 1k M Pitch ginny and mike accidentally have phone sex. yes.

count every beautiful thing we can see by hardlygolden 2k G Stranger Things el comes home. really nice voice for her in this.

Elegia by htbthomas 1k G Stranger Things nancy mourns barb. short, sweet, sad.

objects in the mirror by Snickfic 2k T Stranger Things steve and nancy ask to see jonathan’s pictures, which both is and isn’t a euphemism.

[digg]

life finds a way

[imp-deactivated20171219-deactiv]

i cant believe ive been valid this whole time

[luvyourselfsomeesteem-deactivat]

How come when a house is haunted it’s always ghost from the 1800’s? Why there ain’t ever any ghosts from 2007 who screams “ITS BRITNEY BITCH!”  3 in the morning

[zaraslarssons]

Little Mix win British Single for Shoutout To My Ex

[delicatelyhaunted]

Y’all are so excited about the new planetary discovery but I haven’t seen y’all share the Google doodle!

It’s so fucking adorable!

[postirony-moved-deactivated2016]

you flirting: hey beautiful

me flirting:

[talesofnorth]

[wilsonpatricks-deactivated20191]

#trying to live life as a millenial

[businesshag-deactivated20160606]

[seansavestheworld-deactivated20]

Do you have a valentine?

no, i have anxiety 

[fygina]

@HereIsGina: #Jetra a team of mamas #janethevirgin

[dragongirltitties]

self care is [incredibly unhealthy behaviour] and [implausible feat]

[internet-recluse]

Self care is blaming yourself for your parents death and taking on multiple opponents in unarmed combat whilst dressed as a bat.

[wetwareproblem]

[solvskrift]

my favorite bit in harry potter is when a gangly freckled ginger child with an old pet rat and patched jeans and dirt on his nose awkwardly sits down across from a scrawny underfed lil kid with baggy clothes and broken glasses and lightning carved onto his face and they both think ‘i must protect this boy’

[flightyfinch]

crime noir voice: all the different body parts of this crazy place we call earth and i had to end up in the ballsack. the ballsack of the world. the ballsack town. one night after i’d already finished my beer and was chewing on the glass a steaming hot plate full of cigarettes and trouble walked in my door. she had legs in all the right places