The real evil from a feeder comes when lifestyle changes due to your size are forced. Abilities and experiences, taken from you before you wanted them to be. Before you were ready to say goodbye to that part of your life.
It's one thing to give up activities when you are ready, like walking through the grocery store. There comes a point when a steadily growing feedee will throw in the towel. It's no longer fun. It's a dreaded activity. It's harddddddd. It's a struggle. Too weak. Too fat.
How would you feel if you went for groceries with your feeder, and were told once you got home that it would be the last time you ever walked like that? Gone. No protesting. No negotiations. You now ride the scooter. You felt you had at least another 100lbs before it came to this. It was honestly the most exercise you got each week, and it was wiped away without a second thought.
How would you feel if you woke up one morning to be told that your car was sold, and someone is coming to pick it up today? Your belly hardly started touching the steering wheel! You can't fit in the driver's seat of your feeder's car! You are...dependent. Forced to play along.
The panic might strike a certain way. What happened to your choices? Is your body REALLY that much of a hindrance? It hasn't been that long since you focused on gaining...there's really no going back?
Every feeding takes on a new edge. Months of restricted walking, months of only leaving the home when being told you could go for a car ride, all of it has taken a toll on your mobility. Don't eat enough and you don't have permission for a car ride. But but but eating too much has led to this crisis. And it keeps coming.
Your world starts shrinking. The furniture? Gone. You may either stand or sit in bed. Not much of a choice to be made there, right?
Outgrew your clothes? Your bank cards have been cancelled. Cling on to those last shirts and underwear that you can, or else you may start to exist as the fat naked blob who stays in bed all day.
You want your phone charger? Your last connection to the outside world? Better start meeting those calorie goals. Embrace your funnel. Embrace the snacks in between your meals. Otherwise you'll be stuck in bed, mentally rotting away while staring at the wall.
Life becomes transactional. Single-purpose. You have gone so long without being called by your name. So long without making your own choice without the permissions given to you. The only thing you can control is how much food you eat while your feeder is gone - and falling short of expectations only serves to make life more dim.
One day, you will have your window boarded. Your calendars taken down. Your sense of time will be taken from you.
romaincrisis
theartofmadeline
annaxmalina
areudirty
izzy806
kaledo-art
