[greenstar1234]

I saw monstera is gone too😞 it's because of her that I follow you tho. I'm grateful to have found bi women who also are critical of gender ideology in a way thats actually supportive of the lgbt and gnc. I don't talk much on here but I do appreciate your blog.

That’s really sweet, thank you! Definitely had to step away for my own peace (and life just gets busy) but I’m glad what I was able to post when I was more active was meaningful for you :)

[greenstar1234]

Now that you're back I would love to hear more about your ideas on bi separatism. I remember you mentioning it a couple of times and you're one of only a few bi people I've known to do so.

I hope I can give a satisfactory answer! My brain is not as exercised as it used to be, and I am still catching up with other bi women’s writing as well, which is essential to me in forming my own bi theory and evaluating my perspectives.

At this point, to me, bi separatism is just a dream but one I strongly advocate for. I think a lot of people hear “separatism” and think of going off to live in a commune in the woods but I mean it in the more practical sense of bi people actually pulling out from LGBT groups and orgs and making an effort to create our own bi-focused spaces. What we have now is mainstream, dominated by a gender ideology that is actively harmful to us, and awash with people who aren’t actually bisexual because the pop definition of bisexuality reigns and is therefore meaningless. We have a lot of work to do, but the first step has got to be building the framework by creating boundaries. The first and most important boundaries are acknowledging and standing firm on the facts that 1) sexuality is based on biological sex, 2) there are only two biological sexes, and 3) bisexuality is the active attraction to those two sexes. Protecting our reality must be sacrosanct or there is no foundation to build everything else on.

Following on would be working towards building a strong, proud community that can act as protection against the circumstances that lead so many bisexuals to drug and alcohol abuse, becoming victims of domestic violence, and homelessness.

It’s a big dream, I know, but maybe just mentioning it over and over is planting a seed, idk.

I’ve run out of time so this is not as detailed as it could be so I apologize for that but I welcome follow-up questions or commentary always. I wanna hear from other bi women, as you are all much smarter than me!

[thatsonemorbidcorvid]

My thoughts:

Fundamentally, bi women in lesbian/gay spaces aren’t able to acknowledge our full bisexual identity because mention of opposite sex attraction is discouraged (for understandable reasons). Bi women in straight spaces also aren’t able to acknowledge our full bisexual identity for the reverse reason. It takes nerve to challenge that and live authentically in the face of disapproval, and that nerve is hard to build and create. Spending time in bi-specific, bi-positive spaces might enable that nerve and therefore existing openly in other spaces - but also there will always be value in those spaces in and of themselves.

[greenstar1234]

Okay, I grabbed a second and I’m sorry because I’m going to use it to be petty instead of thoughtful but I happened to see the trending topics on tumblr and the sexyman poll is bleak. That’s how you know for sure Tumblr is majority heterosexual women despite calling itself the “queerest place on the internet” 😂

[greenstar1234]

Now that you're back I would love to hear more about your ideas on bi separatism. I remember you mentioning it a couple of times and you're one of only a few bi people I've known to do so.

I hope I can give a satisfactory answer! My brain is not as exercised as it used to be, and I am still catching up with other bi women’s writing as well, which is essential to me in forming my own bi theory and evaluating my perspectives.

At this point, to me, bi separatism is just a dream but one I strongly advocate for. I think a lot of people hear “separatism” and think of going off to live in a commune in the woods but I mean it in the more practical sense of bi people actually pulling out from LGBT groups and orgs and making an effort to create our own bi-focused spaces. What we have now is mainstream, dominated by a gender ideology that is actively harmful to us, and awash with people who aren’t actually bisexual because the pop definition of bisexuality reigns and is therefore meaningless. We have a lot of work to do, but the first step has got to be building the framework by creating boundaries. The first and most important boundaries are acknowledging and standing firm on the facts that 1) sexuality is based on biological sex, 2) there are only two biological sexes, and 3) bisexuality is the active attraction to those two sexes. Protecting our reality must be sacrosanct or there is no foundation to build everything else on.

Following on would be working towards building a strong, proud community that can act as protection against the circumstances that lead so many bisexuals to drug and alcohol abuse, becoming victims of domestic violence, and homelessness.

It’s a big dream, I know, but maybe just mentioning it over and over is planting a seed, idk.

I’ve run out of time so this is not as detailed as it could be so I apologize for that but I welcome follow-up questions or commentary always. I wanna hear from other bi women, as you are all much smarter than me!

[greenstar1234]

I disappeared for a while and I’m back to vent but I can’t promise I won’t disappear again. I see Monstera is gone :(

It’s just so tiring because I am truly fed up with gender ideology and how much it has taken over liberal and fandom spaces, but the only group of people fighting back against it are massive pricks about bisexuals. Radfems just say the most off-the-wall shit about us to a level that honestly makes me think most of them are as mentally unwell as the TRAs they hate. Radical feminism encourages me to know my worth, and I do: I’m better than interacting with and supporting women who are ignorant bigots. It’s ridiculous.

And before anyone starts thinking mainstream society or TRA spaces are better: don’t make me laugh! Normies still hate us because they think we’re sexual deviants and liberals/TRAs just fetishize us.

But shout out to the super smart and eloquent bi women whose blogs I found thanks to Monstera (and shout out to her wherever she is 💔). Most of you are following this blog and you’re awesome and I appreciate all the hard work you still put into posting about bi theory ❤️ I just got so tired.

[saintgoodlove]

the fact that most public discussion of bisexuals is dominated by the subject of who we sleep with instead of infrastructural neglect and our unique experiences is in fact evidence of the gross, widespread and normative belief that we are inhuman. the very topic "who do bisexuals sleep with the most?" is objectifying, dehumanizing and fetishistic language and no one should tolerate it anymore. not even to debate.

[saintgoodlove]

i don't know any other sexuality that is this policed and scrutinized to the point that so much effort from monos is put into monitoring our sexual behaviour instead of our societal plight. it is so socially acceptable to sexually harass bisexuals by asking invasive questions and demanding answers to those questions which no one else is expected in good faith to answer. they legit treat us like we are criminals on trial that need to vindicate ourselves using our sexuality. for anyone else this is predatory behaviour, but given that we are apparaently animals, we're meant to feel right at home with such questions. this is so normalized that even allies like op think that such a post is genuinely a good thing helping the bisexual community (they really did come with good intentions and that hurts worse). it's so coercive and gross and i've seen the havoc it's wrought on me and other bisexual people. the only proper response to this kind of biphobic rhetoric is to disengage and call biphobes biphobes. literally we have to stop playing bigots' games.

[myosotis-00-deactivated20260514]

There's one thing that really annoys me, and it's the girlies who say :"But bi women and lesbians shouldn't fight! You should kiss eachother instead!" It's so offensive in a way that I can't properly explain...You make it seem like the biphobia we call out from biphobes and the problem we have with eachother in general is just some sort of frivolous bickering, some petty gossip that can be easily solved. But in reality this is a serious and complicated matter.

Happy for you that you never met a biphobe from the L, G or T community, but do not downplay the problems we have.

[zelda-from-twilight-princess-de]

Bisexuality does not exist in relation to heterosexuality and homosexuality on any level, it's it own thing that needs to be recognized as such.

Not all attraction to the same sex stems from homosexual attraction/homosexuality, and not all attraction to the opposite sex stems from heterosexual attraction/sexuality. Sometimes attraction to the same sex and to the opposite sex can stem from the same place, and when this happens, it's known as bisexuality.

Bisexuals have one singular attraction to both sexes, not two separate attractions for them (a.k.a., both hetero and homosexuality) within them. We are whole, not made up of the puzzle pieces of others.

It's internalized biphobia, even if doesn't feel like it, to view your whole, singular bisexuality as the mix of different sexualities coming together, as something that exists depent on heterosexuality and homosexuality existing, rather than acknowledging it to be something independent and whole.

Attraction to the other sex and the same sex aren't naturally opposite, conflicting, exclusive attractions that can only ever exist separated from each other. They're just different (not "better" different, or "worse" different, just different) attractions that can and do exist together as one singular attraction for a specific category of people (bisexuals), even if they also do exist separately and exclusively for others (heterosexuals and homosexuals).

Bisexuality is a whole, singular sexuality, even if you are uncomfortable acknowledging for whatever reason. That's just the reality of it, and acknowledging reality will always matter more than feelings.

Bisexuals have one sexuality, and that's bisexuality. No ifs, no ands, no buts. The sooner you internalize that, the better, for both you and your fellow bisexuals.

[myosotis-00-deactivated20260514]

Dear doormat bisexuals: They will never defend you the same way you defend them, they will never support you the same way you support them, actually they won't support you at all. Don't tell me to shut up because I call out bisexual erasure.

You want to be treated like you're nothing? You want to be walked and shit on? Fine, but do not fucking try to put me in there too. I don't want to hate myself anymore, unlike you.

You'll never use the same energy against me to use it against biphobes, which is really sad.

Regardless, I really hope that one day you'll open your eyes.

[saintgoodlove]

a sneaky form of internalized biphobia is this like subconscious belief that your sexuality isn’t yours. like i didn’t realize how fucking repressed i was until i started thinking of bisexual attraction as legitimate rather than a diminished form of either heterosexual/homosexual attraction that I was wrongfully appropriating from monosexual people. i used to think how i was attracted to the opposite sex was some kind of perversion (bc i didn’t share the same taste with most het people i knew) and i used to view my attraction to the same sex as predatory or fanciful thinking and bc i wasn’t a lesbian, i didn’t have any claim to it. it made being attracted to women so stressful that i just suppressed everything to escape the constant second-guessing of every. single. fucking. feeling. it became a chore where i had to mentally review and prove that i was just as attracted to a woman as a lesbian to the point that i just tried to bury it entirely. i wanted so badly to just belong and fit in.

but once i started accepting myself—like all of myself—instead of trying to force myself to go halvsies for the convenience of people around me, my attraction to both sexes like kinda increased? like all of a sudden my feelings were coming out more strongly and clearly because i wasn’t afraid of them. not just afraid of them existing but afraid of them not existing in the “right way” or to the “right volume.” i’m just bi and i’m attracted to people in a bi way. i’m not lying to anyone or myself and i’m not bi because i’m trying to fit in. i’m trying to fit in because i’m a person who’s been told that I’m wrong for existing. and just bc my experiences don’t fit the experiences of het/homosexual people doesn’t mean it’s in my head or i’m perverted or evil. i’m not appropriating anyone by being myself. and that’s fucking freed me man.

[coloursdraws]

Reaching out

[greenstar1234]

ykw it’s obviously fine not to like anime/manga bc the art style doesn’t appeal to you at all but it’s also not necessary to wildly extrapolate from that distaste and start talking out your ass about yuri if u don’t actually know anything about it. yuri covers any and every genre and there’s a robust community of biological women who create and read it and you’re actually doing men’s work for them by waving all that away so u can dunk on TIMs and pornsick males. if you’re not interested in the genre that’s a-ok but unless you actually know anything about the FEMALE created subculture, you can leave it at that 👍

[usaghinanami99]

I've got no idea what you're vagueposting about, but I'll be damned if I don't share the sentiment!

Still, whatever crazy fanfiction those users are pulling out of their hat, I can bet it can't be anywhere near as crazy as blaming yaoi for paederasty in Afghanistan. Radblr can be worringly unhinged...

[greenstar1234]

The original post was fine in that it was simply someone saying anime/manga style didn’t appeal to her so didn’t care for the yuri media she’d been recommended, but of course people had to build off that and someone ended up saying yuri is mostly for men and it set me off 😆

That post you linked is crazy but Quinn has always been lowkey homophobic so I can’t say I’m surprised she’s the one who made it lol

I will be the first person in line when anyone wants to talk about how very problematic anime and manga can be, including works by female creators, and I myself made a post expressing hatred for the fetishizing males (including TIMs) who have encroached upon himejoshi spaces. HOWEVER, I take umbrage with 1) people who assert that anime/Japan is more misogynistic than the rest of the world and 2) people who decide that the lesbian porn drawn by men is the be-all-end-all of yuri.

The simple fact of the matter is that the entire world is misogynistic, up to and including males who fetishize and colonize lesbian and bi women’s spaces, and Japan is no exception because it’s part of the world 🤷‍♀️ We’re simply at a moment in time where anime is extremely popular and these people are on a fandom website, so they’re are naturally going to see a lot of anime and manga. But they are equating the ubiquity with the degree of horribleness. Furthermore, since they are not part of the fandom, they’re not seeing the conversations had by women in these spaces pushing back against the misogyny and they’re not exposed to the variety of genres the style has to offer. Yes, there is a lot of slop, but imo the same can be said of almost any type of media. Add to that, since anime and manga are so popular right now, there’s a huge drive to push out content in the hopes of having the next big thing that makes bank and so the market is flooded. This is actually a discussion even the idiot male anime fans are having.

And it’s totally fine for someone to say they don’t want to be involved with any of it because it is quite the task the separate the wheat from the chaff here. But don’t make shit up that actually ends up erasing women and their work and the communities they’ve built, is all I ask of them.

[zelda-from-twilight-princess-de]

5 bi graphics against biphobia +1 bi4bi propaganda graphic slapped together by me lol

(backgrounds pulled from unsplash and pexels)

[greenstar1234]

ykw it’s obviously fine not to like anime/manga bc the art style doesn’t appeal to you at all but it’s also not necessary to wildly extrapolate from that distaste and start talking out your ass about yuri if u don’t actually know anything about it. yuri covers any and every genre and there’s a robust community of biological women who create and read it and you’re actually doing men’s work for them by waving all that away so u can dunk on TIMs and pornsick males. if you’re not interested in the genre that’s a-ok but unless you actually know anything about the FEMALE created subculture, you can leave it at that 👍

[bisexualdarling-deactivated2026]

While I don’t care about fujoshis, I don’t like seeing straight women fetishizing REAL bi males. I had several het mutuals who joked they wanted a bi boyfriend/two bi boyfriends for their yaoi fetish. I only ever follow seperatists so I suppose that they don’t really meant that seriously. But it still struck me as fetishision of bisexuality and made me uncomfortable so when it came from a straight woman I blocked her. but I also have bi female mutuals who said the same. I thought it was weird but since they didn’t mean it serious and are bisexual themselves I just ignored it. but I am still not sure if that actually did count as fetishision. What do you think?

You're giving heterosexuals, members of the oppressor group, far too much leniency when it comes to weaponising their privilege to openly fetishise members of a group that they oppress.

They might claim to be "separatists," but there are heterosexual women who will try and hide behind, "but I'm a woman and oppressed, and he's a man and therefore my oppressor!" to exercise their privilege and enjoy taking part in oppression. It's just that heterosexual women get off very lightly when it comes to their blatant heterosexism, and they can more successfully hide behind, "Men are the problem, being an oppressed woman cancels out my other privileges!" to be as bigoted and hateful as possible.

Bisexual socialisation ensures that we consistently downplay blatant evidence of biphobia and continually give biphobes the benefit of the doubt, because we are conditioned into not trusting our own sense of reality, and trained to need someone else to tell us what is and isn't acceptable.

You also have to bear in mind that because of that bisexual socialisation and the lack of trust in ourselves, a lot of bisexuals will wait and then copy either heterosexual or homosexual biphobia to self-soothe through that psychological self-harm, or to subconsciously separate themselves from other bisexuals to cope with their internalised biphobia.

It isn't acceptable fetishisation from anyone, whether they're bisexual or not, just as sexualised, objectifying misogyny isn't suddenly okay when it comes from a woman. When it comes from a woman, we recognise that as blatant internalised misogyny and a need to fit in or separate herself from women. It's the same here.

We can have nuance when it comes to fictionalised characters (and maybe I'm a little more hypocritical because I'm so cynical about the media at large), but fantasising about real (if hypothetical) bisexuals like that is disgusting. Bisexual men are not sex objects to fulfil fantasies. That is exactly the same biphobia that heterosexual men fantasise when it comes to bisexual women, and it's not okay.

Stop and ask yourself whether you weren't talking about biphobia, but were talking about something else, you'd be so forgiving and presume that they "didn't mean it."

Heterosexuals are constantly coddled and protected. Don't be fooled into ignoring their privilege just because they're oppressed on another axis.

(And if they're claiming "separatist" but "joking" about fetishising bisexual men, then I'm pretty sure that they've just figured out that the word "separatist" makes everyone else switch off their brains to their heterosexual privilege, as is common in feminist spaces.)

[bisexualdarling-deactivated2026]

When a bisexual woman is in a relationship with another woman, she's in a "lesbian relationship," even though she isn't a lesbian. When a bisexual man is in a relationship with another man, he's in a "gay relationship," even though he isn't gay. When a bisexual is in a relationship with a member of the opposite sex, they're in a "heterosexual" or "straight" relationship, when they're not heterosexual. This common and ignored example of language-based biphobic erasure is much more important than it might first appear.

Sexuality As Relationship Status

Language is so incredibly important, because it shapes how we view, understand and interact with different issues that we face, as well as the general world around us.

The use of the term "heterosexual (or straight) relationship" ensures that heterosexuality is seen as the default. If a relationship is "heterosexual," then it must be for heterosexuals. On the other hand, a "homosexual (or lesbian/gay) relationship" is positioned as heterosexuality's opposite, deliberately separated as far from heterosexuality as possible to ensure heterosexual comfort. There's no space left for bisexuality at all. If a woman and a man together reinforces heteronormativity, and two women or two men reinforce homonormativity, then the only hypothetical (and unused term) "bisexual relationship" has to be polyamorous with both sexes included, which defaults to the immediate biphobia that bisexuals are hypersexual and unable to commit to a single partner.

The use of this language innately denies bisexuality and biphobic oppression, because it deliberately pushes and reinforces the idea that bisexuality and bisexual-exclusive experiences aren't real, only heterosexual and homosexual sexualities and experiences are real. Bisexuals are reduced to objects where nothing matters but our partner (or potential partner), and only heterosexuals and homosexuals can therefore speak on bisexuality and bisexuals, since the implication is that whatever we think we experience, only they know the truth.

Homonormative Acceptance of Heterosexism

Despite homophobic oppression, the acceptance and agreement in spreading this heterosexist dichotomy means that within the LGB community, homosexuality becomes and stays the default. This makes it much easier for homosexuals to deny biphobia to centre themselves, and therefore will support heterosexism to at least be "rewarded" with basic terms and hypervisible recognition, despite still being entirely and equally as oppressed as bisexuals. Since the LGB community is homonormative, bisexuals default to homosexual-centred language and judgement, and so thoughtlessly accept submitting to sexuality-based language that erases our own.

When we submit to saying that a bisexual can be in a "heterosexual relationship," not only is that bisexual forcibly re-closeted, they are groomed to submit to their opposite-sex partner and the heterosexist and heteronormative behaviours and beliefs surrounding that dynamic, and every bisexual-specific issue, experience and support needed within an opposite-sex relationship is washed away. That does nothing but make biphobic oppression more invisible, and leaves bisexuals to suffer alone without the help that they need, while being gaslit to believe that they are "oppressors," and so are manipulated to stay silent about all of their struggles.

When we submit to saying that a bisexual can be in a "homosexual relationship," not only is that bisexual forcibly re-closeted in the other direction, the other issues also apply, but in the context of centring their homosexual partner. With the added dynamic of recognising that their homosexual partner is oppressed for their homosexuality, and the biphobic belief that the bisexual is only "half-gay" and therefore only "conditionally oppressed" compared to their partner, there can be an additional layer of accepted emotional and biphobic abuse that's overlooked, or even encouraged from their partner. In both cases, if both partners are bisexual, it encourages mistrust and suspicion between them, damaging them both as they are socialised to treat other bisexuals as potential "sometimes-oppressors."

If we allow others to describe bisexuals as being in "heterosexual relationships" or "gay/lesbian relationships," then either heterosupremacy or homonormativity within the community wins. It supports the same blatant biphobia that says, "bisexuality isn't real and biphobia doesn't matter, only relationships and visible behaviours matter, and the sex that bisexuals date dictates how bisexuals can be erased."

This is a great example of why biphobia is so insidious, because even if you recognise that biphobia is wrong and you deserve equal respect and freedom from oppression, the casual biphobic language has still groomed most bisexuals to subconsciously think, "If I'm in an opposite-sex relationship, I'm in a heterosexual relationship, so I'm basically nothing but heterosexual" and "If I'm in a same-sex relationship, I'm in a lesbian/gay relationship, so I need to remember to think about lesbians/gay men, who are really the important ones here not me," via society's (and then the LGB community's) biphobic gaslighting, which in turn subtly chips away at our feelings of self-worth and self-confidence, because yet again, it's other groups determining our visibility, our experiences and our worth, which means we trust ourselves less, which means that we question our sexualities more, which means more negative mental health outcomes.

The Actual Reality Erased

Whenever a bisexual vents about hurt or anger in being erased, and their relationships not always treated as part of bisexuality, there's a common mockery, particularly towards bisexual women, who are said to be "obsessed with making her straight relationship gay," or "fetishising homosexuality," all to guilt trip bisexuals into submission and subtly spread more biphobic abuse. Sometimes, that's described as bisexuals "ignoring material reality," where only the homosexual reality matters, because of the biphobic, homonormative belief that only homosexuals are oppressed, and if a bisexuals don't perform enough homonormativity, every bisexual-specific issue or experience is erased, nonsensically dismissed as examples of "heterosexuality" or signs of "straight-passing privilege."

The real question underpinning all of this is a simple one: are there any actual benefits to bisexuals in erasing this biphobic sexuality-based language, or is it stereotypical bisexual "attention-seeking"?

If bisexuals in relationships with the opposite sex aren't erased as simply being in "heterosexual relationships":

Biphobic abuse from heterosexual men towards bisexual women won't be erased or buried, and they will be able to access specific support geared directly towards bisexuals, considering the much higher levels of domestic violence they face, instead of being treated like heterosexual women

Bisexual men won't be dismissed, ostracised and abused thanks to the biphobic stereotype that they're "really just gay," but could more openly date and love women without biphobic suspicion

Bi4Bi couples who are closeted for fear of biphobic (and violent heterosexist) abuse will be able to access support from LGB communities

Bisexuals will have the ability to stand up and be literally counted for the likes of governmental assistance or funding for bisexual resources

Bisexuals will not have their sexuality constantly erased to the point that they are gaslit to question and be uncertain about their own sexuality and experiences

There will be space for bisexuals to discuss the nuances of being bisexual and having a partner of the opposite sex, navigating the world in that unique way

Heteronormativity is challenged and bisexuality isn't erased to pretend that both bisexuals and heterosexuals experience the world in the same way just because of who a partner happens to be

If bisexuals in relationships with the same sex aren't erased as being in "homosexual relationships":

Casual biphobic emotional abuse that self-victimises homosexuals in "your bisexuality victimises me because I am homosexual" won't be tolerated, and bisexuals will be able to access support instead of be expected to console homosexual abusers

The biphobic lie that "bisexuals mostly end up in relationships with the opposite sex" ends, and bisexuals can more easily become more visible within the community

Particularly bisexual women who prefer or only want other women stop believing in the deliberately isolating, internalised-biphobia inducing biphobic myth that they're "a minority within a minority" that both encourages them to hate and not relate to other bisexuals, which currently immediately manipulates them into submitting to lesbians instead

Bisexual men can openly challenge the homonormativity that constantly erases them as "gay men in denial" so that they can be visible and share their experiences as bisexuals

Homonormativity within the community is challenged, bisexual-exclusive experiences and understandings can become joint centre-stage, and both lesbians and gay men can fully own their own unique understandings of themselves and their experiences without being made to share that with bisexuals, too

Bisexuals will be able to have an equal voice with homosexuals, our unique experiences can be discussed, and we can better challenge biphobia within the community

If bisexuals aren't stuck within that false "Heterosexual vs Homosexual" dichotomy in general:

Bisexuality as a unique sexuality will be more easily accepted as something entirely separate from both heterosexuality and homosexuality

Biphobia will be better understood as a unique and separate oppression

Specifically biphobic abuse within relationships of all kinds can be discussed, studied and addressed to support bisexuals and help prevent bisexuals from being targeted by exploiting biphobia to control them

More specific bisexual experiences will be counted and understood as unique bisexual experiences, instead of being denied and erased, allowing more bisexuals to connect with each other

Bi4Bi couples who are out challenge the current norms and show that bisexuals can (and often should) partner together, because we understand our own sexuality and experiences more than anyone else ever can

Bisexuals won't have our love, loyalty and commitment challenged because without being erased, others know that we're not one or the other sexuality torn to bounce between them, but individual bisexual people who fall in love and commit just like everyone else

None of the above are exhaustive lists or examples.

What that all boils down to is that without the language there dismissing and erasing bisexuals within relationships, and therefore not dismissing and erasing bisexual-exclusive experiences, downplaying or denying biphobia, and ignoring biphobic abuse, bisexuals - and those around us - are forced to recognise that we can't be shoved into the "straight" or "gay" boxes, because we're bisexuals, and we will never be either of those things, or experience life or even our attractions the same way that heterosexuals or homosexuals do.

This biphobic language comforts heterosexuals and appeases homosexuals and harms bisexuals, and bisexuals need to learn to stop perpetuating biphobia.

If you're bisexual, never refer to yourself as though you're in a "heterosexual" or "homosexual" relationship, because that is the wedge that is deliberately used to sneak in, deny your bisexuality, deny your experiences, and kickstart the process of gaslighting you and making you more susceptible to abuse.

The only reasons that anyone could ever be against the point of dropping those biphobic descriptive terms for bisexuals is because they're biphobic, they don't actually believe that bisexuality is a real and unique sexuality, they don't want bisexuals to receive care and support, and their aim is to erase bisexuals in any way that they can.

Just because there are terms that are normalised, that doesn't mean that they're harmless or should never be challenged.

Be brave and stop allowing biphobes to define you. You'll be amazed at what a change in oppressive language and the ability to correctly name your experiences does for how you can fully perceive your world around you.

[equil-429]

I may or may not sound like a broken record, but bi women have been the subject of discourse after discourse after discourse, and time and time again, the women who partake in this discourse (regardless of any aspect of their identities) have proven to be just as heartless towards bi women as the men were. As mentioned in another post, these women let their personal vendettas seep into their political praxis and end up condoning misogyny/abuse apologia (even from men) towards bi women because of it, while they hide it behind the men they pretend to hate (“oh, it’'s because I’m misandrist 🤪, I hate men lol men are evil!!!”). They’re performative misandrists, as well as performative feminists. And there’s just a whole different level of disappointment from that.

I'm about to sound corny, but I do want bi women to understand this:

Regardless of your dating preferences, neither men nor women are worth sacrificing your overall health for. At the end of the day, men and women are both generally and fundamentally flawed, as human beings are. You can't guarantee that the person you are with will be safe by virtue of their sex alone. Yes, men systemically have shown to be more violent, I don't deny that, but it's disingenuous to suggest that women are incapable of abuse of any kind, and you shouldn't have to stay with one just because it's rare to find a female partner in comparison to a male one.

Just as much as I’d rather you be with a woman that loves you than a man that hates you, I’d rather you be with a man that loves you than a woman that hates you, even if those men in question are few and far in between.

You're an individual human being deserving of respect. Please have some self respect and cherish the individuals in your life who actually deserve it. And tell the losers in their shitty SJW spaces who pry into your dating life and sex life in order to determine your worth to them to kindly FUCK OFF!!! ^_^