Mary Grace J. Estallo

              Xapis. 90's. 50's-60's. Vaudaville. Rococo. Wayfarer. Cinematography. Sculpture. Wildlife (Megacosm). Eventide. Armistice. Beatles. The Supremes. The Rat Pack. Quadron. Audrey Hepburn. Meryl Streep. Diane Keaton. Blythe Danner. Natalie Cole. The Hitman. Jazz. Bossa Nova. Reggae. Bebop. Upbeat. Sentimental. Old School. Instrumentals. Beat. ALfa Romeo, Austin Healey, Cadillac, The 1955 Ford Thunderbird & 1961 Mercedes Benz 220SE Cabriolet. Beach. Dark Room. Dim Light. Bedizen. Tea. Vintage. Vinyl. Blankets. Italian. Chinese. Filipino. Western. Japanese. Dancing. Singing. Photography. Poetry. Cruise. Love is Shit Love is Stupid Love is Non sense Fool's Paradise. Serendipity. Finess. Millstone. Repose. Happy Pills. 

[greisehopper]

Injured past

I thought i met the man that i will spend the rest of my life with. someone i can depend on, to share the wonderful things in this world but i was wrong. He let me down and walk away. I was ruined, broken and empty! I barely see myself in the mirror without tears in my eyes.

We're engaged! but not anymore.

Now, I've moved on.. It's time to for a change and selflove.

[greisehopper]

The nearness of you

Nobody knows what dancing really means to me. I am always dreaming of someone who will take the courage to dance with me in front of many people or just the two of us. I always wish that every relationship I had before. I was hoping that they will find some time or just randomly ask me for a dance, but no one did that and the relationship failed.

Why dancing? I always find dancing as one of the most romantic things to do when you are a couple. Slow dance, holding my right hand, his right hand wraps around my waist and my head on his chest. It's perfect! I wish to find someone who can do it even if he is not a dancer. Well, you don't have to be a dancer. You have to be someone who loves doing it. I'm firm, strong woman but I have this inside me "hopeless romantic" that always hits me at the end of the day. I went into the situation where I asked myself, what's wrong with me? Why these men are not dancing with me? And there's a time where I want to tell the person to dance, but see, if I do that the sparks will be gone, so I waited longer...

I know one day, the right person will come and he will dance with me without me asking him. The romantic way is when the two of you are doing something differently, but suddenly that person will pull you and ask for a dance. In my relationship before was lovely, but not as wonderful as I have right now. Me and Dav went to a lot of circumstances and we even came in the peak of saying "it's done!". We separated, we even stop communicating, went to different relationships and just forget about each other but you know what? We end up being miserable after the relationship.

We found each other again last year 2017, we start talking again, November when we decided to start over again and see what will happen.. Like I've said there's always a circumstance, but it has changed this time. We always find a way to get back to each other. We head up to the next level, when he finally meets my family twice this year. The 2nd time is the most precious one for me, why?

Me and Dav went to this place just to hang out and have time, just the two of us. This place is not even that romantic, but I was shocked when he asked me to dance with him. I was hesitant, I don't know what to do! He just pulls me in, holding my hand, grab my waist and my head on his chest. I heard his heart beating while we were dancing. Dav is not a dancer, but I remember exactly the feeling, it's like I'm the luckiest girl in the world and right on that night I knew that he is the man I have waited for.

I'm filled with happiness and love. My love for him grew and grew every day. I love him so much! He brings out the best in me. He make me feel that I do deserve someone who can take care of me and love me for the rest of my life.

At last, we danced!

[greisehopper]

Lo♥︎ing Legal Life: How to be better, brighter, stronger hhttp://flip.it/pc8o4g

[greisehopper]

Our Value

A well-known speaker started off his seminar by holding up a $20 bill. In the room of 200, he asked, “Who would like this $20 bill?”

Hands started going up.

He said, “I am going to give this $20 to one of you but first, let me do this.” He proceeded to crumple the dollar bill up.

He then asked, “Who still wants it?”

Still, the hands were up in the air.

“Well,” he replied, “What if I do this?” And he dropped it on the ground and started to grind it into the floor with his shoe.

He picked it up, now all crumpled and dirty. “Now who still wants it?” Still, the hands went into the air.

“My friends, you have all learned a very valuable lesson. No matter what I did to the money, you still wanted it because it did not decrease in value. It was still worth $20.

Many times in our lives, we are dropped, crumpled, and ground into the dirt by the decisions we make and the circumstances that come our way.

We feel as though we are worthless. But no matter what has happened or what will happen, you will never lose your value. You are special-Don't ever forget it!

Look on yourself!

[greisehopper]

“TACO SHACK” - Mexican food in Tagaytay (Philippines) 

February of this year(2018). Me and my boyfriend went for out of town, As we head back home we saw this mini restaurant. At first, we were hesitant to eat as there was no customers eating at all. I went to park my car first and have a look on their menus and if they were accepting cards. The girl from the restaurant was trying to convince me to eat there and try there food. Well, me and my boyfriend really love Mexican food! After seeing the menu I went back to the car and tell my boyfriend to try it because we were so hungry.

The Food and Service

We’re amazed that the food was really great. I mean, the restaurant was small, no customers and i mean you can’t define if you’ll going to enjoy or not. So, how can you tell that they serves really good food. right? The service was fast and the server was friendly. We ordered Quesadillas, Beef Nachos, Tacos, Enchilada, Burritos. all are delicious! definitely 2 thumbs up! My boyfriend really enjoyed his food, just imagine that your boyfriend chooses to eat that delicious food than talking to you (UGH!). They got 5 kinds of spicy sauces and that’s heaven for me. The one that really stands out for me is the Chili Habanero with 5x of spiciness. Imagine me sweating but keep on eating because it was really nice and i can’t stop eating and putting the sauce in my food. OH GOSH!

Pricing

Well, that’s something i was really shocked! the price was really cheap. The price was really reasonable. All our food was 2x but our food cost was only P1,059 (Cash Basis)If you’re going to other restaurants like this, It will be 3x of the price and the taste was not that really satisfying. We’ll definitely go and visit this place again. 

The satisfactory makes us feel in a “FOOD COMA” Lol! It’s crazy plus the best thing is we loved it.  Sometimes we should not look on the outside of a place because we never know maybe they really serves the best food.

February 2018 (Philippine Vacation). 

Peace out! - Gracehopper.ph.sg

[greisehopper]

Random Questionaire

Girls most probably choose:

1. Nail Art or Plain

2. Books or Movies

3. Tea or Coffee

4. Sunrise or Sunset

5. Summer or Winter

6. Shorts or Pants

7. Long hair or Short Hair

8. Flowers or Chocolate

9. Slippers or Sneakers

10. Dine in or Take out

11. Shades or Eyegalsses

12. Sweet or Savoury

13. Fine Dine or Fast Food

14. Desktop or Laptop

15. Sand or Rock

16. Salsa or Cheese

17. Bread or Rice

18. Water or Juice

19. Pizza or Pasta

20. Subaru or Mazda

21. Church or Park

22. Lipstick or Lipgloss

23. Big or Small

24. Mayo or Mustard

25. Weekdays or Weekends

26. Beach or City

27. Philippines or Thailand

28. Pork or Beef

29. Wine or Beer

30. Love or Hate

This is so cool! Let’s answer it.

[wnq-quotes]

I want more. Everything. Maybe too much. Don’t think I want any less.

Lana Turner, Imitation Of Life (1959)

Read more at wordsnquotes

(via wnq-writers)

[wnq-writers]

10 Advices for myself : 1. Be kind. But not too kind. 2. If you feel you’ve been hurt, you’re hurt. Period. No one else is allowed to tell you how much you’re allowed to hurt. 3. Make the blame. But also take the blame. 4. People are gonna call you, “Crazy” and “Weird” and “Mad” for doing your own thing. Take the compliment. 5. Everyone’s first priority is their own selves. So put yourself first no matter what. 6. If you like that notebook, buy it. So what if you have more than enough empty pages back home? More the merrier. 7. Write. Draw. Sing. Dance. Act. Cry. Laugh. Curse. Do whatever the fuck you want. So long as it doesn’t affect them, no one has the right to complain against it. 8. The world is full of hypocrites. You may even find one in the mirror at times. But it’s alright. 9. Whatever you do, don’t put reins on your dreams. Dreams are the only highways with an infinite horizon that holds the impossible. 10. Laugh. Keep laughing. Happy is your best look.

beingjustlittlered, writing prompt #62: list 10 pieces of advice you’d give yourself (via wnq-writers)

Epic true!

[greisehopper]

Mistri Road

Rabbi Dr. Abraham Twerski “Fish Love”.

True love is a love of giving not a love of receiving!

June 28 2017, I met a guy who i didn’t expect that he will be taking a huge part in my life. A met a guy on a dating site that currently popular in this country i’m living in. Before i was thinking of not doing it and just don’t give a shit, One day i received a notification and a message from this guy that also living in a same country. At first i thought he was just a random guy who wants to have fun! Accept it that in this generation it’s really hard to get a man who will take you seriously and will be someone you can turn to. I was not serious nor in a mood of chatting with him, why? i went to the point of asking myself, why is a 36 years old man is still single? How come? Until we decided to continue our conversation in other social app and there, i get to know him more. Slowly, we became comfortable with each other until we decided to meet for dinner. I can’t say that it was great night but it’s just fine! After that i told myself that maybe that will be the first and the last meeting, why? because i don’t see any sparks or let say i don’t see myself being with this guy. He’s quiet, we talked about work and just like not totally interesting, aside of we both like music especially reggae, that’s all. Yes, i admit that i judged him that fast but because i don’t want to waste time. My time is precious and i feel like my clock is ticking and it’s completely annoying! 

After that, i became sick, Oh God i don’t know what happened and it was a really funny part after meeting him and we start communicating constantly. July 8, he asked me to join him is this Jazz bar. So we meet again and things are getting real. I didn’t understand my feelings, but i start liking him. I saw his cool-fun side. while in that bar i told him that i will be away for business trip for 5 days Frankly, while in my trip i always think of him and it’s weird because i start missing him which makes me feel stupid. July 14,  after being away, we decide to have dinner again although i’m freaking tired because of my trip, I don’t care i’m indubitably excited to see him, so much! July 15, we decided to meet again the same jazz bar then we went some place to eat dinner. July 17, something happened and i really don’t expect that we will have our first fight. That the worst decision i ever made in my entire life. July 18, Morning i decide to talk to him and asked him if we can meet to talk about what happened last night and he say yes. i appreciate that and it feels like he also wants us to be fixed. That night we settle things and start again. July 20, we went to a movie and it was full of laughters and sweetness that i will never forget. Yes, without a doubt i’m falling in love with him. 

July 21, we had dinner in his place! damn, what am i doing? that’s my question? I’m getting attached with this man and start thinking of “Is he also falling in love with me?”  I tried to ignore and not to think too much because, well let’s put it in this way, He is a SEPARATED MAN W/ A 4 YEAR OLD KID!  This situation he have is kinda chaotic for me but what can i do? I’ve fallen in love with him. I embraced this even though i know in the end will be painful. I’ve fallen in love with someone can’t be mine, how is that possible? I disregard this and continue seeing him. After that i stop doing this like messaging him first on the other day. I’m walking in the park and  trying to figured it out what to do? how to avoid him. My heart says just go it won’t hurt me but my mind says that i have to stop before i completely become so attached with him and lose my emotion.

July 23,  another misunderstanding came up, i went to his flat to talk about it, when i decide to go home he wants me to send me in the lobby but i refused because i’m going to cry and i don’t want him to see me crying.. This misunderstanding took us 4 days, non stop fighting and i start getting numb.. I want him badly, mixed emotions! I want to slap him and day bad things in front of his face for him to feel that it’s hurting me so much… July 28,  I was with friends and he also with his friends, Friday night party, 2:30 AM of July 29, I decided to ask him if i can see him. I was tipsy and uncomfortable that we are not in good terms and thinking of he is having fun without me. Makes me paranoid! 

Okay, we did meet at that time and seems like our misunderstanding became not an issue anymore. That’s it, we’re okay again. we became more open to each other, until this Aug 5, while watching movie suddenly his wife called and i won’t hide it, suddenly i feel like i’m a mistress..Our relationship don’t have any labels, We just go with the flow and it’s a mutual decision. I don’t have the right to be mad at him or to be jealous.. After that scenario, i start Chatting with my ex on my phone. I don’t hide and i know i have a fault also that i should not do that while with him. I’m an idiot in some way!! After that we become quiet and then i start saying “I’m going home”. I really feel awkward that night, i don’t know why i decided to go home instead of talking to him and hug him. It’s just i can’t look into his eyes and i can’t even move my body to do that.. Damn weird and things ends so fast.. I love him but i don’t own him.. someone owns him and i don’t want to ruin the chance that maybe one day his family will get back together. I love him that’s why when he say we have to stop this even though my heart is  saying NO! I can’t do anything but to set him free. While taking cab back home around 2:30 AM, I can’t help but cry and start blaming myself , asking why did i do this? I love him and that is why i choose to let him go instead of asking him back. I love him and that’s enough for me now. I love him so much!

I know one day, i will be okay! I want him to be happy even without me.

[fyp-science]

Any fool can know. The point is to understand.

Albert Einstein   (via fyp-science)

EXACTLY!

[greisehopper]

How i wonder, I want to know what if?

Every day, I asked myself what if? 

There’s a certain days especially when i’m alone asking myself what if? There’s a lot of things running into my mind and sometimes i keep wondering what if i’m still in that situation, what am i doing or where am i now? Regrets? Yes! I regret most of the time and it’s killing me. Sometimes i think that maybe i’m in a better place but in some point it reminds me of what happened and makes me realized that it’s was not best for me. Moving on is one of the hardest part in a person’s life. Creating a new life without that person you used to be with for the longest time. It was painful for me to start from the scratch again and thinking that we cant go back from what we are before.. I thought that i am at my best relationship, but it ends up because we’re both different and even if we tried so hard, things will never be the same. I still cried and think of us when we’re still together but what makes me feel sad is that we already have our own life. Sometimes, I wonder what if i reach out to him and ask how is he? Is it crazy to do that? 

[greisehopper]

FADE

Orange and Lemon I can see it in your eyes Love is burning oh so bright, tonight I miss you love, I miss you so badly Heaven only knows how much I'm missing you I've been thinking of you Every night and every day, my love I've been holding you so tight Holding you close in my dreams Somewhere, somehow We will find each other Broken pieces of our dreams Won't fade away Here I am, reminiscing the past Thinking of us under the sun I've been thinking of you I can't forget the time When you told me that you love me How I wish you would just call me

[greisehopper]

What is all about Football?

Well, it’s nothing to do about me, but to my boyfriend! This morning 25-12-16, me and boyfriend had skype (Long Distance Relationship). I just wanted to greet him a Merry Christmas and it’s really waggish when i asked him what is he doing, He replied: “Watching Football, but i don’t mind talking because my team are losing the game..” LOL! We continue talking (Taunting). The funny part is while we are having a video call, I noticed that he keeps looking at the TV and check what is going on, but i really adore him for being his priority even though it’s his favorite team.. I do really appreciate it! Frankly, I wish i was there with him while watching football and gave him the best support i can ever give and maybe i can make a midnight snack too. I’m not a fan of football but when your love someone, you have to adopt it and appreciate it, then soon you will start loving it! It’s just funny and witty whenever we talked. I feel like i’m complete everytime i saw him or even just talk to him. Not just about football but everything! He inspire again to write and go back on track. We never know someday i will play football! hahaha (That’s impossible).  Love will always be fun!

[greisehopper]

Make friends Online? but love begins...

I can tell, that i finally found someone, not just a friend, a lover but the one!

Make friends online, Yes! I met him there when everything seems so dark.. When things are getting more worse and when i almost give up. In some way, It’s just turns out wonderfully. It’s weird when i send him a message and include my phone number, Stupid isn’t? Why would i give my number to a totally stranger, But i did! (Embarrased). After a couple of minutes, Someone message me in “Viber” and that’s the start of our love story. LOL! I believe being stupid sometimes can bring good things (hahaha).

At first, The reason why i sign in to that site is just to gain friends. Divert my attention to something different. Different that i can make friend through online to a totally strangers, But i believe that it won’t harm anyone by searching for new friends.. That time i was too fragile and shattered. All i’m asking is to talk and share interesting things, But it’s never been easy! It’s like you’re doing a trial and error, Something like that!

And here we go, I message one guy. A total stranger! Well, It’s hard at the beginning, were i don’t know how to begin the message for him. (I told you it’s weird). I feel some weirdness and i don’t have any clue why am i doing that! When i send the message, He replied and that’s it! 

That man, is the man i want to spend for the rest of my life.. To be honest. When we start talking, I told myself this is it! We talked like we knew each other for a long time. We feel comfortable to each other. we laugh, we plan, we became more deeper and we love each other.. I respect, adore and love him so much. It’s just i don’t see myself without him in my life. He makes me happy, pissed, irritated, sad, worried, loved and blessed! In short, It’s a total package..

He loves me with all his heart (I guess) lol! But yes, We love each other more than anything else. He is the one i prayed for, And now he’s here, i won’t lose him. This feelings of mine is for a lifetime and no one can ever change that. I might be stubborn, hardheaded, crazy but he owns my heart! His voice, His face and his love for me will always be unconditional.

I love him and that’s for life. I can’t wait until we finally be together. Travel together, cook together, barbecuing while drinking beers, Watch football and i can’t wait to take care of him. I love you and that’s true!

[greisehopper]

Career vs. Love, What will you choose?

Are we requires to choose???

There are times that you have to choose between Career or Love, What will you choose? It’s like choosing what to follow, Heart or Mind? 

It’s weird when you have to choose and you have to think of it, Carefully or else you’ll regret it in the end. How awful it is, One of my relationship is like this. Sometimes i wonder why you can’t have both and work on it? As per others, You can only choose one! which is for me i find it as “Selfishness”. Real relationships, doesn’t require to choose to any of this. Real relationship requires understanding and supporting each other. Every couples should know how to be supportive and not dragging each other  down. I want to know why some people are afraid when their partners are getting more successful and why they can just support and be happy for them? Wake up! This is not a competition between the two of you, This is not a crime.This won’t affect any relationships if the both of you are open to understand things that can possible come to any relationships.

You don’t have to choose to any of this.. True relationships are measure by being there for each other, No egos, No dramas, No insecurities, No explanations but pure love and understanding. That’s what you called “Mature Love”.

Support is one of the best thing you can do for the person you really love. If He/She fails, Lift her/him up! That’s what they needed most. 

#basedonmystory #lackofsupport that’s why we fail!

[greisehopper]

I can imagine what will be, If i’m with the right person. “Happiness”

[greisehopper]

It’s been said that love finds you when you’re ready..

“It’s been said that love finds you when you’re ready..” The question is how long it takes? What if you’re ready but still nothing's there for you, Will you still wait or you gonna start finding it?

I’ve been to a lot of different kind of relationships. Long Term, Short Term, Long Distance, Abusive, Complicated, Insecure, Rebound, Post Time Fling Etc. You name it! But i was wondering when will i have and achieve the so called “The Truly Compatible Romance”? 

This past few weeks, I was really confused of what i really want in life.. Thinking of different things to do, Thinking of travelling again, move to other countries or find new job.. I want to live alone and be more independent. Somewhere i can start again.. 

I want to know the feeling of having that truly compatible romance, Something different from others, Something you can be proud of. Imperfect but compatible relationship. Something that you’ll be happy to have and keep it for the rest if your life. Maybe i end up nothing because i always seek for love, I search for someone to love because the truth is i’m afraid to be alone and my ego was too formidable or maybe i’ve been choosing the wrong person all this time, But we can’t tell if that person is the right or wrong one to love. We can only tell if the both of you did not worked out, So you already know the answer! In every relationship, Everyone are trying their best to work on it and everyone is hoping that relationship will last forever. The fact is “Good enough relationships” is the most ideal relationship the we can ever have. Relationships are conducted by two people who sees imperfections but willing to try and secure a future together. How ideal is that?

Every break ups, people will try to find someone they can use, for them to heal their hearts.. But it’s not necessary to look for someone just to replace the sadness that we feel. We can do a lot of things. Like travelling, Go out and meet friends, Spend time with family, Divert your attention by focusing into your work or Sport (Activities). Tons of things we can do. Slowly, But before that, we must be ready for one important foundation and that is the Acceptance. Accept the fact that we have to move forward and never look back! It’s a matter of mind setting and of course forgiveness..

Now, I decided to wait patiently for someone i truly deserve. I will wait for the right time and for the right person that in the end can say it loud & clear that i’m in a “Truly Compatible Relationship” because i wait... and True love was finally found me. 

Just wait patiently.. You’re on your way there...

-Gracehopper