@sunhalf asked: "You're my best friend. You know that, right?" It's sudden / maybe it isn't / it's getting harder and harder for Piper to ignore the way that every day feels more and more like Merry is going away. Or preparing to? Children don't acknowledge what hurts, and neither do they, but — but they just want — "I...care about you. I dunno. This is stupid. I just wanted you to know."
“ yeah, i know. ” the answer comes easy to merry — which is funny, because this is so far from easy. it’s a heavy sort of truth, and it doesn’t even know if it can say the same for them. it’s... complicated. there’s florian and faust, but are they friends?? or family?? he’s never known family, stuck in the general care of the castle for all the good that did him. if they’re friends, it guesses they’d ———
it doesn’t matter. whatever the order is and whether merry decides to think about it or not, there’s something growing. it’s a void. it’s a black hole. it’s something that devours and eats at the edge of their emotions until they’re left feeling nothing but distance. and it’s not fair for himself, or for piper, or for florian, or faust, or even lilia ( it’s merry’s own fault he gave up on it in the first place, difficult as it tries to be without reason ). it’s not fair, but it is.
born wrong, merry’s always guessed. there’s something missing. always has been, always will be — but whatever’s missing’s being replaced now, sickly blot doing its best to choke the life out of him sooner rather than later. there’s no way to fight it at this point, so it doesn’t.
instead, they smile easy and reach out a hand to ruffle the back of piper’s red hair. the smile’s a bandaid, flimsy and only covering what’s there, but it helps. “ trust me, pipes. i know. ”
