Burn

THE BASICS Allie, Allison, Al  22 HS English Teacher ΣΚ Alumna My heart is God's  

[hammondallie]

Shift

The past 3 months have been full of constant change as I’m transitioning from college life to grown-up life. I started a summer job, accepted a career, moved into a new apartment, was a bridesmaid in a wedding, survived a girls weekend in Chicago.......

And the vibe of my life feels so different. After 4 years, I finally feel settled. It is the most wonderful, comforting, and secure feeling and I never want it to disappear again. It’s crazy to me that it came amidst all of this change, but I think it makes sense because college life just wasn’t for me.

With this huge life shift, I’ve been re-organizing like a mad woman. This blog is the last little piece that feels unkempt and before you jump to conclusions-- no, I can’t bring myself to delete it. However, I’ve created a new, fresh, crisp, clean, empty space for all my future ponderings at allisonnh.tumblr.com. I’m planning on posting every Sunday about my week; complete with pictures and too many teaching stories, I’m sure. I’m actually really looking forward to documenting my daily life (and will probably struggle with the thought of it being too boring at times), but hey that’s okay!

This blog will remain as is and viewable at anytime if you ever feel the need to remember what 2009 Allie cared about.  *The new URL for Burn is hammondallie.tumblr.com

Thanks for checking in (I’m lookin’ at you Mom and John)

xo A

[hammondallie]

Birthdays are a bit strange to me because I didn't do anything special on this day, not one thing, yet everyone I hold dear took a sliver of time out of their day to make me feel special. And after my birthday I always end up kicking myself and promising that I'm going to do a better job of making others feel special on their birthday like they have done for me. Maybe typing it out will hold me accountable. Today was the best June 12th I have ever had thanks to my 3 fav girls, paper lanterns, and sprinkle donuts. I'm telling you now, 22 is going to be my best year ever.

[writerswritecompany]

[d-essert]

[dailydoseofstuf]

[hammondallie]

My summer started today with a BOGO free trip to Coldstone followed by $5 movie Tuesday downtown with my 2 favorite gals. My summer starts tomorrow with my first day at my new job as a receptionist at the best hair salon in town. Which also means I'm about to have rockin hair. I think I love this.

[hammondallie]

Today was my last day of student teaching and one thing is for certain:

Every part of me was made to be a high school teacher. I adore every minute as Ms. Hammond

[pinkandgreenlivingthedream]

[caitstadler]

[amaliaandrade]

[hammondallie]

Today was my 4th Easter with J and his family. Like every other Easter, we were treated to breakfast and lattes followed by Easter baskets and church where we ran late (as usual). We all dressed up and took pictures and ate Easter lunch. Everything was normal. Except for this tiny moment during the service where Mark was praying. J grabbed my hand (like always) and squeezed it between his palms and for some reason I all of a sudden knew that no matter where we go or what we have to face, as long as I have Jesus and those hands, life will be just fine.

Saying that I love this human just doesn’t seem like enough. It’s different than the “can’t stop thinking about you, shower me with affection” I love you kind of love. It’s the “I see you. I get you” I love you kind of love. The “I know we asked the baker if these brownies have nuts and he said no, but I taste peanut butter so put that down right now” I love you kind of love. The “I’m putting my snotty allergy tissues in your purse because I don’t feel like walking to the trash can” I love you kind of love and the “I honestly want to do whatever you want to do” I love you kind of love. Whatever happens, life with him is always going to be my favorite adventure. Thank you, God, for orchestrating every piece of us from the very beginning.

[frnklins]

[hammondallie]

Be still, be still, be still.

I started searching/applying for jobs in January. They told me most school districts wouldn’t start posting open positions until March or April, but I wanted to get a head start. As expected, no job openings were available but I wasn’t concerned! I was 2 months early.

Fast forward to mid March and my roommate (who has a different certification area) started applying for openings and booking interviews. The race had begun but I couldn’t go anywhere-- there were zero English positions. Zero. 

It would be one thing if there were openings and I didn’t get hired. I’d tried. And I’d keep trying. But nothing is more frustrating than not even having the option to try. Especially since I found open positions in almost every content area but mine. Math, French, Science, PE, Choir, History, even Tech Ed. I assumed that since they had these positions posted, that their English departments had all resigned and there wouldn’t be any future openings.

I began to ponder God’s plan. Maybe there were zero positions because God had a job lined up for me and didn’t want me to commit to something else too early on? Maybe my plan isn’t even to work in a school? Maybe I’ll just be homeless and jobless forever idk?

As I was sitting in Erica’s room talking job stuff, I felt compelled to grab my laptop and check openings at my top choice high school. I’d checked multiple times before but nothing had ever changed-- always only 2 openings. Today a little red 3 stood next to the link marked “High School Teaching” but my typically optimistic brain was surprisingly doubtful.

And there it was. JobID795: Communication Arts- High School 9-12. The first and only English opening in a 20 mile radius. At my ideal school. Posted on the day I checked.

I will forever be in awe of the perfect God that moves my world. 

[elemesy]

It was one of those March days when the sun shines hot and the wind blows cold: when it is summer in the light, and winter in the shade.

Charles Dickens (via itsmycroft)

I read Great Expectations almost exactly three years ago and I was thinking about it yesterday. It was the spring after my darkest winter. I felt like I was coming alive again- along with the spring flowers and the sun and each turning page, I was new. With that book comes one of my most cherished memories which I really can’t accurately describe. Even now, my heart legitimately flutters when I think about John taking me to his parent’s house for the first time over that Easter weekend. After being filled with aching turmoil and despair for months, my heart finally found rest at the Baughman’s. I have a few distinct memories from that weekend (getting pedicures with John’s mom and her introducing me as her son’s girlfriend even though I wasn’t, snapping pictures of the gorgeous house and sending them to my mom when no one was looking), but most of all I remember reading Great Expectations in our spot on the basement couch while John watched The Masters. Such a simple memory. And definitely not the most significant part of the weekend. Funny though, how brains hold on to tiny details. I always tell everyone I love that book. But now I wonder if I actually love the book or love knowing I met my family while I was reading it.

[hammondallie]

[gracewins]

[hammondallie]

Legs, and arms, and lungs, and heart.

I went running today. Like most days. And I was thinking about some stuff. Like most days.

Normally, I just run, but today I wanted to time my mile simply because I haven’t in awhile. I ran a 7:33 which seems to be my magic number. I started thinking about how it’s nothing spectacular, but then I stopped myself. I thought back to 9 year old Allie and her dread of P.E class, her overwhelming lack of coordination, and her 10 1/2 minute mile. That little girl would have never thought she could be as fast as the soccer girls in her class. Yet, here we are.

How cool is it that we’re never done growing? That we’re constantly going to be doing things we never thought we could do? That the person we are today isn’t the person we’re going to be?

I’d love to go back and tell 9 year old Allie that someday she’ll have boobs (small, but still good), that she’s going to have some of the coolest women as best friends, that she’ll figure out what to do with all that hair, that her brother won’t be completely annoying forever, that gymnastics is just...no. No gymnastics. That boys are about to start hurting her sensitive heart, and that it’s kinda okay to be vulnerable and let them. That high school will change her life completely and college even more so. That it’ll take about 10 douchebags before she meets the right one, that any opportunity to travel is ALWAYS a yes, that Jesus is going to save her from every chain, and that someday she’ll run a mile in 7:33 like it ain’t no thing.