Harry Watters: Study Abroad UDLAP 2017

Follow my semester abroad in Mexico during fall 2017. I will be studying at la Universidad de las Americas Puebla as part of an exchange program through the University of Utah, my home university. I will be posting blogs, vlogs, and pictures to document my adventure as it unfolds.

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Valemadrismo

Mexico is close to the US both geographically and culturally, but differs from the United States and Europe in a lot of ways. An interesting (and maybe offensive) term that I learned to describe the general cultural philosophy of Mexico is the word valemadrismo, which comes from the common phrase in Mexico “Me vale madres”, which is an offensive and particularly strong way of saying I could care less. It’s similar to the use of “I don’t give a f**k” in American English. 

The term valemadrismo describes the generally more relaxed culture in Mexico with respect to rules, laws, punctuality, paying attention to politics, etc. The stereotype associated with this term is that people in Mexico tend to be more relaxed and spend less time stressing about and trying to fix every little detail of their society, instead choosing to just enjoy life as much as possible with the resources they have. Of course, not every person in Mexico has the same philosophy about life and society, but during my time in Mexico I did observe the culture of valemadrismo in different aspects of Mexican society.  

In Mexico, a lot of people love to party and enjoy life, even if there happen to be  serious issues facing their society like drug trafficking, kidnapping, widespread government corruption, etc. I got the sense in Mexico that everyone is aware of the problems that Mexico is facing, but for many people it just wasn’t worth the stress and time to sit around worrying about those problems all the time, as many people really aren’t in a position to improve the society level problems facing Mexico. 

There are pros and cons to a more relaxed culture. In my experience people in Mexico seem to be more happy on average than a lot of Americans or Europeans. At the same time, I think if people are too content to just ignore problems and try to enjoy life and only focus on the good times it actually makes it more difficult to address political and societal challenges. 

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Readjusting to Home

My video blog about returning to the US from my semester abroad in Mexico

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Academics at UDLAP in Mexico

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My video blog about public transit in Mexico

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Dating Etiquette in Mexico

Given that the United States and Mexico share a border, and a lot of media and  popular culture, you might think something like dating would be virtually identical between the two countries, but there are a few differences I have noticed. Keep in mind of course that a cultural practice like dating is highly varied within any country, and the things I have noticed certainly do not apply universally. Everybody is a bit different.

Compared to dating among millennials in the US, dating in Mexico tends to be less casual and tends to follow the rules of what in the US is viewed as old school chivalry. By old school chivalry I mean things that men used to be expected to do universally on the dating scene, like always picking up the check, always opening a door, always having an umbrella on a cloudy day ready to deploy so your date doesn´t get wet, etc.

Of course, being polite and a gentlemen isn´t viewed as a bad thing in really any culture. That being said, if you overdo it with “chivalry”, at least in the US, your behavior may be interpreted as sexist, and sometimes rightfully so. Not every woman wants every door opened for her, or wants you picking up every check at a nice dinner and expecting something in exchange at the end of the night. 

The chivalry common on the dating scene in Mexico even goes beyond the normal door opening and umbrella holding however. For example, if you are walking with your date, the man is expected to always walk on the part of the sidewalk nearest the street, and the women on the inside part away from the street. Also, if your date is carrying a purse or bag, you should offer to carry her purse or bag for her. (This would be very strange to do on a date in the US, unless it was your wife/partner or something like that). Additionally, when you get a table at a restaurant, you should always try to find a coat/bag stand and offer it to your date so that they have a place to hang their things. Finally, if you should order a cab, or if you pick up your date in a car, you should always go around to open their door for them from the outside before entering the car yourself. Likewise, when you park or leave the vehicle, it´s expected that the man go around to let the women out of the car, and that he offer his hand to help her step out.  

These are just a few of the dating customs I have noticed to be different in Mexico that I found to be different/strange to me. Some may interpret them as a nice gesture, a sign of respect, while others might find them to be excessive or even sexist behaviors. I am not going to interpret them one way or another in this post, I just wanted to share my experience with this cultural practice in Mexico.

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The Earthquakes

(Rubble from the main cathedral in San Andres Cholula, Puebla, MX)

Mexico has been struck by two major earthquakes during my time here, the first was an 8.2 that struck off the coast of Chiapas, killing 98 people and toppling buildings in the states of Chiapas and Oaxaca, just to the south of Puebla. The second was a 7.1 magnitude with its epicenter here in Puebla. 

The second earthquake was far more deadly given its proximity to the more populated areas of Puebla, Morelos, and Mexico City. The worst effects of all were felt in Mexico City, where the buildings were larger and more susceptible. Apparently, the effects of major earthquakes are also amplified in Mexico City due to its construction on a dried up lake bed. 370 people were killed, the majority in Mexico City, and over 6,000 people were injured.

I had never felt an earthquake in my life before my time here in Mexico. During the first earthquake, I was up late studying when my bed started to shake. At first I thought a large truck was going by, but then I noticed my laptop shaking on the desk and heard the house cracking and moaning, it probably took 10 seconds before my brain was able to understand that it was an earthquake. Fortunately, the Chiapas earthquake was far enough away that the earthquake didn’t cause any damage here, and was just a minor scare.

The second time, when the earthquake hit in Puebla, it was far worse and I immediately knew what was happening. I was on the third floor of the library on campus studying for my next class when suddenly everything just started shaking. I wasn’t sure how to react, or how serious the situation was, at first some students were sort of laughing, but then the shaking got worse and students started running for the exits, I got up and did the same. When I reached the stairs they were already completely full, as every student was charging for the exits at once, just as I was stuck at the top of the stairs the shaking intensified and became much more violent. I heard a loud snapping sound above and I looked up to see that the wall had cracked, my heart was pounding and for a moment I thought if the shaking got worse the roof would come down on top of us. Some students started to scream. I noticed some books falling off the wall, but tried to focus on getting down the stairs as quickly and calmly as possible with the herd of people I was a part of. At some point, I’m not sure when, the shaking stopped, when we finally made it down the stairs the entire university was standing outside in the main courtyard, as everyone else had already evacuated. 

Victims of the earthquakes that lost their homes and family members are still recovering, and it will take years to rebuild and recover in the worst hit areas of Mexico City. Needless to say, the second earthquake was a pretty terrifying experience, fortunately there was no major damage on campus and nobody on the university campus was hurt. 

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La panchanga, la fiesta: Party Culture in Mexico

(Image from Day of the Dead celebrations in Oaxaca, MX) 

Celebrations and parties are an extremely important part of life in Mexico, the student and campus life at la Universidad de las Americas is no exception. UDLA is located directly on a street called Calle 14, which is a long boulevard full of restaurants, bars, clubs, pubs, etc. The students at UDLA and young people from all around Cholula and Puebla hit the bars and clubs every week in large numbers to dance, drink, and party. Every university has a night life and party culture to an extent, but the party culture at UDLA is much stronger and more prevalent than the University of Utah. The weekend here starts on Thursday for a lot of people, not because they don’t have class on Friday, but just because that’s when people want to start going to the bars and clubs again. Given that the drinking age in Mexico is 18 instead of 21, this means that even more young people can go out and participate in the night life. 

This aspect of the culture was strange for me to adjust to, especially given that I am 28 years old and grew out of my party phase years ago. These days, as a college student, I tend to be more of a nerd who likes to hang out in the library, drink coffee with my headphones on, and study as hard as I can. I have sacrificed many weekends as a biology and pre-med student to stay home and study when a lot of my friends and other students go out to party and relax. Here in Mexico, I have been out a number of times to the clubs and bars for the sake of getting out of my comfort zone and seeing what it’s all about. I have to say, Mexicans really love to party. It’s not uncommon for the night to get started at 11-12 here, and the parties can go until 5-7 am, at which point party goers will get breakfast and then go home to sleep it off. I have only stayed out that late twice here in Mexico, and both times I was completely drained for days and lamented my decision. I personally could never be an effective student and still go out for 2-3 nights a week like a lot of students at UDLA do, but being here and observing the party culture has definitely been interesting. 

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Culture Shock: 5 Things to Know About Mexico

I’m not sure that all of these things constitute culture shock, but all of them are things that surprised me or that I’ve noticed to be different during my time living here in Puebla, MX. If you plan to travel to Mexico in the future these are some things you may want to keep in mind.

1. Water: Do not drink the tap water! You won’t find drinking fountains on campus or anywhere else for the same reason. The tap water is not purified or treated to be safe for consumption in Mexico and could contain any number of unsafe chemicals, metals, bacteria, etc. This means you will have to budget water as a daily expense. 

2. Toilet Paper: You can’t flush it down the toilet. Almost everywhere in Mexico you will see a little waste bin right beside the toilet, this is where you have to dispose of toilet paper as the plumbing system in the vast majority of the country is not built to handle it. 

3. Items unattended: If you’re from the US, you may feel comfortable walking away from your laptop at a coffee shop or a public place for a few minutes to use the restroom or what have you, this is not advisable in Mexico. This is even something that the officials at UDLA warned us about during our first week. If you leave your items unattended in a public place for too long or forget them behind, there is a good chance you are kissing them goodbye. The people of Mexico are wonderful and kind, but you need to keep in mind just how valuable a single phone or laptop may be worth in a country with widespread poverty and a very low minimum wage. 

4. Punctuality/Ahorita: This generally doesn’t apply as much at school or work, but in casual life you should probably get used to issues of punctuality. It’s not uncommon for you to have a date or a plan to meet friends and have them show up or be ready anywhere from 30 minutes-2 hours later than planned. It’s just more of a casual culture when it comes to time. A very common word in Mexico is “ahorita”, which means “right now”. Just keep in mind when someone tells you “ya me voy”, “ahorita vengo”. or “ahorita me voy” you should consider “right now” to be meant in el sentido mexicano, not in the literal sense. 

5. Excessive Politeness/Formality: I didn’t want to publish a list of 5 things that all seem negative, so I feel like I should mention this also. People in Mexico are incredibly polite and formal, they often treat you with a level of formality that might seem excessive in America or in the English language. When complete strangers walk by your table as you eat they will often say “provecho” or “buen provecho”, which means bon apetite. If a complete stranger walks out of the room or leaves the table they might say “con permiso”. Servers, Uber drivers, and even just people on the street use frases like “mande” and “a sus ordenes” and they refer to you in the third person as “usted” in place of “tu”. It’s just an aspect of the culture here that was quite strange for me at first, but it is something that has grown on my as time goes on. 

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Departure

I left for Mexico about 36 hours after taking the MCAT, a 7.5 hour exam required to apply to medical school. I spent 5 months studying for the test. The MCAT was a shadow on the horizon that hung over my head all spring and summer as I juggled my coursework, volunteer work, and research obligations. During the spring, as my life became increasingly stressful building up to the MCAT, and as I started to feel stretched thin and pulled in every direction by school and work obligations, I decided that I wanted to do an exchange program. It’s something I had always wanted to do, and I realized that after I graduate this coming year I may never have the chance to do it again. 

So in the spring, I committed to a semester length program during fall of 2017 at UDLAP, la Universidad de las Americas Puebla, in San Andres Cholula, Mexico. After doing the best I could to handle all the paper work and logistics, I pushed this trip out of my mind. It was floating there in the distance, but the only thing I thought about with any depth for the following months was the MCAT. After I walked out of the MCAT on August 3rd, I had a single day to pack and fully prepare to live in a foreign country for four and a half months. I hastily threw everything essential that I could find room for in a single suitcase and my backpack. I had dinner with my family the night before, and then bright and early on August 5th I went to the airport and hopped on a plane for Mexico City.