Maybe You'll Remember Harsha

My personal memories

[haytin69]

12th February 2017

Long time since we posted. It has been 9 months since the last post. That’s a long time.But time flies by too damn fast. See how this blog has traveled and changed with us. We started writing this blog to vent our feelings on Meena. We should be thanking her for this blog, this was a good decision, except we did not know that in the beginning. Was reading the previous post, felt nostalgic. Change is real, I accept. 9 months ago we felt lonely(a little bit) thinking about a girl. Today we mostly think of our work. How will tomorrow’s action items be, What will Alok say, What did we learn this weekend? Mostly about work. This was a surprise post, retrieved the tumblr password to use it. Should make a post on MuSigma and our initial journey. I don’t think i’ll ever forget Meena. I have to say that for some weird reason that name feels uncomfortable. Everything that happens in your life, happens for a reason. Probably the whole Meena thing happened for a reason. Somewhere in my heart, we still have feelings for her. But it is a lost cause. Let us think about what all has happened in this 9 months, but not in this post. Let’s introspect in the next few posts. Time to read some old posts feel Nostalgic and sleep.Like the new tumblr interface.

[haytin69]

First of May 2000 & 16

It’s 12 22 AM.We are watching Lucifer the TV series.And why did we decide to write this post..... well loneliness. We have dealt with loneliness before , this is not new. Don’t know what happened but i just felt soo relieved after that previous sentence. Maybe it is true of what they say about writing, It helps get over “things”.Lets think of our supposedly bright future, What have we got.A happy family, A semi clear path, I don’t know?? I’m not clear of what i’m gonna do. What is that i want my future to be like.Blank, I am blank.We are more of ‘live in the moment’ person, I guess.Hope has fueled us so far and will fuel at least for the next few years.Our future certainly looks rich and desirable from a middle class wanna be rich and secure point of view but i really don’t know what is that i really want. Is this what i want in life, I don’t know.Supposedly i’m also getting married before 25, according to mom.How confused am I? Anyways nothing matters as long as we are happy.Life is weird in its own way, It is ambiguous that we certainly know.Got exams from 4th.But maybe we are thinking of Meena a little more than required. We really had a connect i accept that. We didn’t have the courage to say that nor did we have the clear mind path.We’ll get over her it’s a matter of time.I feel relieved, maybe a little.It is a good thing i’m writing this blog. These are moments you’ll never remember but i can re live them now. It’s certainly confusing. Let’s sleep it off. Hope tomorrow is less lonely and as usual hope we study for the freaking exams.Peace 

[haytin69]

27th April

Its been generations since did a post.What happened? A lots of trivial shit.My mind is pestering about Nidhi. Let’s put a dot to that thought, we told her what other people think of her and she got mad and started talking big words like attitude and shit.I said fuck this shit and unfriend her. Simple and clean.Coming back, this blog was a punching bag for us during our first proper crush Meena days.She has set a benchmark now on how a girl should be. She has her own downsides which we don’t consider.I fear i’ll one day regret that i never had to say to Meena that i liked her.Hope we meet someday, And i’m pretty sure i’ll say that to her.All the fake conversations we have are golden, I wish my brain had a hard disk that saves all these conversations.Collage is almost over, Exams should be cake walk for us.Looking forward to our new phase of life.New people, New friends,New place and for the first time we’re going to live on our own,spending our own money,making our own decisions. OMG the thought itself excites me.We deactivated our facebook account and i hope it stays that way for ever. Camon we were using it more that we should. The one sad thing is we don’t have any contacts with a lot of our friends(by this sentence what i’m trying to say is that i lost Meena’s contact as we have also deleted her phone number).I just had the thought of what she’d feel when she reads this blog by mistake.I expect her to laugh.This blog is the existing proof of how childish our thoughts and feelings are.I’m surprised how quick we decided to deactivate our FB account.The whole thing took us just like 2 minutes, a flash thought and we instantly decided and immediately deactivated our account.No last status, Im leaving FB status.One thing we need to accept is lately FB has been causing a lot of mood changes in us,we’re spending quite some time in FB. Suddenly you’re happy, you use FB and you’re sad the next moment.Not good at all.You expect everyone(This means Meena(most of the times)) to comment, like and do shit.But they don’t. That makes us sad.Our social skills are zero and if i continue using FB avoiding real contact it’ll only get worse.Everything that happens in our life is for our own good.Its high time we did our post on Meena. We’re certain that she’s not interested in us so chill and do the post.She was rare in one aspect.We never wanked keeping her in our mind for a long time(more that 4 months).Our average wank off period for a girl is 2 days or max a week.What does that mean....maybe respect,maybe we way too amazed to find someone soo similar to us.I don’t know...Fucking laptop lost internet i have to copy this shit to word and ten again post it after restarting my system.Oru flow va poitirundhadhu ....en da ipdi panringa.  

[haytin69]

8th April

Its been a long time since we did a post. Maybe we were busy with life. We had our project. Our project, What do I say about it. Worthless would be the word. We had fun doing it. Dealing with dead lines, the risk of them finding our plagiarism, we just finished our project by copying, remixing, and making Ani do the work for us. Engineering is indeed shit, And our collage is supposed to be in the top 50 collages in the country. Everything in life happens for a reason. ‘Steal it like an artist’ was a good book that we’re applying for quite sometime in almost everything. There is always you wanna talk about. This post would be about our failed adventure of finding love, though its not the appropriate word to be used. Today we have decided that this is not the way to proceed and we got better things that can be done. Why do we think it wouldn’t work? This is confusing to write. It’s making us think a lot, Are we not good enough, I don’t think so, Its just we didn’t find the proper girl that’s all. For the past few weeks everyone was a prospect and suddenly today we are out of the game. Yes this was a very different energy filled experience that I accept. It was filled with so much energy, anticipation, skill, hard work, dedication and what not. For us till now in life has come in our way. We have never chased for something in our life or changed path for a certain thing. And we will not do for love too. So we have decided in destiny. Believing in destiny is more brightening and also exciting that’s what happened for us with Meena. Destiny is what defines us, don’t you think. Yes and this blog is turning out to be a brilliant thing that we are doing. OMG it is making me to explore our deeper depths of mind. We might have just decided our tag line for life. Of course inspired from Meena. There are certain failures that are sweet that we don’t wanna forget, she would be one. She has paved way that led to understanding the real me. At least, a part of me. If someone else read this post, I’m pretty sure they’ll think that I’m mad. So we have decided not to go after every possible love prospect and leave it to destiny. We should accept one thing we saw every girl as a prospect. Every fucking girl. Its true you hear what you wanna hear, you see what you wanna see. That was a random bullshit our mind is manufacturing right now. It’s trolling us. Fuck. Collage is ending. And we are going to play our farewell dota tournament. I know we’ll lose but let’s try making the experience a fun and something at least our dota buddies Sarvesh Puppy will remember when they think of dota or me. Too much to ask. Shit we always start missing when a part of life ends. Happened in school, now in collage. I rate the collage above my school, Hands down. Randomest post today, but accept, it is what our thought process is and has been. Have fun bro Harsha, you don’t love to be happy, actually we don’t need anything. Scene…. I’m ending.

[haytin69]

March the 29th

Where do we start.Kuruksastra got over. Just like every other year we enjoyed the music but did not dance. We even learnt dance moves but we are not a dancing person. Our socializing was just such a failure. It was real bad. We met Nidhi on the second day of KS (25th). And let us thank her for making time for us, making us meet her .We realized socializing was not our thing and it’s not really fun. 28th we sent her our previous blog posts regarding her. We really did a mistake today by not talking to her when she went past us. It’s OK, we don’t care. We have learnt lots of things about our self in this past 3 months. Huge thanks to Meena. We have realized how awesome we are. What makes us happy. Now our four years of engineering is getting over. That fear of forgetting our friends has come. We make all these awesome friends and just forget them. I hope it’s not the case this time. This week we are planning for a small tour and that’ll be fun. Hope we go. Let’s talk about our sharp mood changes. Why does this happen to us. One moment you’re happy the next moment you’re sad. I’m sad or don’t know how should I call this mood, that I experience. You’re just not happy. Well it’s not loneliness or sadness. Probably it should be the recharging time. Our discomfort of talking to people is slowly fading. Now we should do some meaningful posts. The frequency of uploading posts has been slowing down. It’s OK we can’t simply write every day. MS Word is such awesome software. This is best way to learn English writing. This thing just identifies all your mistakes. It’s just awesome. We watched Deadpool such an awesome movie. It had so many things that we wanted to see in a movie, which made it way too awesome. Our craving for a girlfriend has finally ended with a huge learning and understanding. It’s real what they say about solutions to our problems. We should search for solutions inwards. Understanding yourself is the only solution for all our problems. A lot of philosophy coming out of our brain. We should try drawing some of our ideas or thinking. Let’s try it. Enough for today. When do I think I’m gonna read this post again?.....

[haytin69]

March the 24th

Well i think it’s time we did our post on Meena or it might become late.How was yesterday? We had one of the most embarrassing moment in our messaging career(wtf career).Firstly i was boring.Why was even boring? It could be because i was not really interested but still wanted to be a gentleman and continued the conversation till its end. Noob Shit from my part.One thing is right, everyone has unique messaging ethics, we have our own.Lets see our ways of messaging.Just realized i think like i am taking a class, Funny .....if we think, Why? No idea.First we don’t message more than one girl at a time or concentrate on only one girl.We always want the conversations to have proper endings or we’ll just keep thinking about them till the next conversation.Proper endings are very important.We take time and research on the person we’re messaging.Why did i tell this?,Well Shrinidhi’s ethic was not to end a conversation even if it was booring. Anyways she said lets talk about something in the class and i sent her what i was thinking that im not really confident around girls.I said hi to her in the class but did not talk to her.We just couldn’t muster the courage to talk to her in the class but it was fine.We are who we are,Fighting our demons ,for that small happiness we get in the process.We’re meeting her this saturday.Let’s see what happens.KS host show was just like everyother year. Oru moolayile ninnu we enjoyed our music.Short post exiting days ahead.

[haytin69]

My 22nd Birthday on 22nd of March

How did it start, We were in Sengi’s room chilling,12 08 sengi realizes its my birthday, My two closest friends wish me ,that would be vishvak and sengi.Don’t know what i was thinking ,as i was about to go out of the room and sleep suddenly i tell them to ask me any question they wanted and i’d answer.I dont really answer any question straight i often avoid tackling the problem by avoiding it or going around it.Sengi wanted to know what i thought of him.It was Vishvak’s question that made my day(birth).He asked me about why i liked Meena and why do i think i am friend zoned. That was good we were able to atleast share a little part of our trouble.I am pretty sure he was able to understand.We should probably do our post on meena and move on with our life.The only thing we wanted to have this birthday was her to remember our birthday and she did not.That was not sad but such a let down.The reason why it was not sad is coz i knew this was gonna happen.She is 99.99 % out of my life.This makes her another crush.Makes me sad.Cool, happens.Teja gifted me the cup.It was pretty good,It was a pleasant surprise.Tomorrow is going another important day.Let’s see what happens.If shrinidhi is going to talk to us.Or is it just going to be just any other day.We have started to get a clear image on how to proceed with our project.And don’t know is it cause meena didn’t remember our birthday or is it something else.But were finding shrinidhi as a serious prospect.Now we wanted someone who was ambitious but considering how all these ambitious people act i’ve started to think its better to go with someone who loves to travel and doesn’t want to give up her dreams for me.We have time to think about it.This is not the time for this.We had a peaceful and satisfying birthday.We have learnt a lot in our 22nd year and it was the most successful year of our life till now.Let’s hope our 23 rd year be filled with happiness and success.

[haytin69]

Teja’s 20 years old

It’s March 18th, 4 days to my birthday, The only thing i’m expecting this birthday is for Meena to not forget me. Let’s talk about something that happened today morning, Athletics events were going on in the ground and me and Vishvak were walking that way. I did not realize that there were girls there and only did when i went near, I started doing what i do always, look away or do something other than to look at them. Vishvak asked “Are you really this self conscious around girls?” Well its real ,we are self conscious or in simple terms weird when we are around girls, But its entirely different when you’re around women. When ever i’m in my native place, going to temples , relatives houses or whatever, my granny is my buddy, i will always hangout with her asking her all stupid doubts and making fun of all people with her.I prefer hanging out with her rather than with my boring cousins or uncles.It has been a week since our last post. We gave our green tech presentation,which was not even 40% of what we thought of giving but i think we impressed our mam and also to a certain extent the students.They will at least remember me as the bald guy who gave a weird funny but meaningless presentation.It’s true of what they say about crushes, you just tend to forget them. How bad you have a crush on her is directly proportional to the amount of days it takes to forget her.We don’t really remember how Nithya looked like.We just have a fake mental image,thats how we want her to be.We almost forgot about Shrinidhi, the girl who had small talk with us(first).But you don’t even notice her.She was a driving force for your presentation yet you did not even notice her during the presentation.I fear its same with Meena i haven’t messaged her for more than a week, we don’t check her last online every 5 mins(though we did it at a point of time).We also wanted to talk about being offended and offending someone.Of course we have offended a lot of people and we can offend and piss people very easily and we think its some gift we have.We have comparatively good sarcasm.It’s healthy and it can light up boring situations But sometimes it is the ugly aunt of anger.People get pissed ,badly because of our sarcasm. Today Prassana got pissed off.Well it was his mistake.But we should learn to blame ourself.We shouldn’t have talked to his that close,Some people are meant to be passer by scum level small people.He’s another one.We’re happy you have one less person to talk to.Is that bad or good ??Let time answer this question. 

[haytin69]

March 12th

It’s been a long time since i posted.It’s because of exams that i had. Health education was a disaster,Business and Marketing were fun to write.For green we had prepared but we got unexpected questions but we’re satisfied as we gave our full effort.Lets see how much we get.10 days to my b-day and 12 days for my second review.4 days to our presentation.It’s going to be busy fortnight for us.We have decided to go offline for 10 days.Why did we decide to go offline?We have done this all our life.we say we don’t like being distracted or we’re wasting time in FB and wattsapp but the truth is we have failed in our potential relationship and you’re sad and afraid.So you try to avoid it.Let’s see how this pans out.We have started reading a new book.We should seriously try to complete this book.Its about how to talk.”Steal the show” by Michael Port.We have been a good orator or conversationalist or presenter.We just have to develop and hone our skills better.Its still self learnt and is school level basic.It’ll be useful to both our presentations and for our conversations.We shouldn't fail miserably like in the case of Meena. She is the reason we’re going offline. Accepting the truth at least to myself.What do you think is the outcome of this? I have no idea.We want the world to give us our solution or show us the direction.After all that is what we have been doing all the time right from our birth. We have never made a stance on anything we just let things unfold and we just try adopting to the situation.Is that good for us ,well ...time only can tell that.Bored as hell but i think i should end the post.Hope this week has some surprises for us.  

[haytin69]

March 7

Thanks to some random post, today we have something to talk about. The advantage of having a crush, lots of them. If you’re a human, you would have at least had 3 crushes in your life. Now what are the effects of a crush on your life. Let’s see, If in school you would be staring at her almost always unless you’re busy. How can we define crush, well according to the post, she should be someone you like to kiss. A kiss is a best way to show happiness or love. We always wanted to kiss Nithya. We always used to see her (not always but whenever we could), Her hair, she used to have an awesome single plait. Her lips, Her smile. Her smile used to send chills in my spine. The advantage of a crush is, you almost certainly know you’re not going to be in a relationship, but you get to see her always, with more enjoyment and less thinking. It’s pure beauty with less thought. When you think of a beautiful and cute smile she comes up in your mind. You need someone to come up in your mind, some real person would be memorable. Ok in collage we had, of sorts, virtual crush, which is common these days and a short term one subject crushes. I’m saying about my current situation. That bunny looking girl in health education and shrinidhi from green tech. We think of all these hypothetical conversations we might have, which is just fun even to think. Whenever our bunny looking girl comes to class, who mostly is late, We think of rabbits and how easy it would be for us to lift her and kiss her in the air. As soon as we get into the class we search if she’s there. Fun. For my convenience lets refer shrinidhi as the tall girl or the girl. I’m still not comfortable with names. She always comes to the class before us. For relatively lonely person like me, going from hostel to the class is a long time. But when you have something to look forward to and to think on the way, We just removed loneliness by filling our brain with thoughts making us less lonely. We are thinking long sentences today. Exited. We did some art today and uploaded for that one girl to see and maybe, maybe, she’ll talk something about it. Hope, that is what drives us, but sometimes, we create this fake hope, which is good. You know its fake but makes you do things. So what did we learn today or decide today. Make crushes, as many as you can. Enjoy life. That satisfaction you get after posting a good post, or its maybe it’s because of the ambigram we drew today. Chill. Time to sleep.

[haytin69]

5th March

What would i want this post to be.... Lets think.Okay let us talk a little bit about our collage SASTRA. I think i’m getting that feeling you get when you’re in your final sem.You want to leave the collage, But you know you’re going to miss a lot(a lot).You regret joining this collage everyday but deep in your heart you know choosing our collage was a good decision.One thing we’ll never regret(I hope) ,We didn’t learn SHIT in our department. I shouldn’t be calling myself a mechanical engineer. Everything is for our good. We had fun in our department. Chill profs, chill dean, coolest of the coolest classmates.We didn’t have any girls(8 girls) but you know i don’t really care.What all did we learn in the whole 4 years. We learnt some english(maybe), Watched a hell lot of youtube videos and english movies. We learnt ten times more from internet than from our department. All the life skills.We sold my story to a company and fooled them. But we always knew our path was always the unpredictable one.I’m happy that i have survived my collage.Met the expectations of mom,as i always have.Only once have i felt that i let mom down and that would be 12th result, Maths marks.That is the failure on which my collage life is based on.If it was not for that 187 i got in 12th maths i wouldn’t be here. A huge thanks to.... who can i say, Kudigara Kumar.Useless mofo. Absolutely useless teacher he was.Coming back, Everything that happens in our life is certainly for a reason.One thing you learnt in the collage would be playing games and in third year after fighting with our team, we realized we have wasted our 3 years and we dont have a engineering future.We started to think of writing cat, joining a bank or doing agriculture. But who would have guessed that games would help me get my job. We started doing meaningful things after fighting with our team.We had soo much time with ourself that we got to know more about us.The last two sentences felt sad to type.They meant i was lonely, pretty lonely. We got some new friends, which we always do.How do i even make friends real fast.I just make friends,because i really value friends a lot and spend time knowing them,We are a good conversationalists ,we are funny and our wide knowledge across fields and all the philosophy we talk.But we find it difficult or even regretful that we just move on and forget our once friends.We just cant get the answer for that now ,we need more experiance.Sri vidya wants to meet me.Will she be the first girl i meet? let us leave that to fate.You’re mean.you’re perception of fat girls.It is bad.But i am what i am.Aaaaaaaaaahhhh Lets end this.Bubye to myself.Im soo full of myself.

[haytin69]

4th March

If you have noticed i’ve skipped 3rd the march.It means we’ve moved on in life.We have just checked the last seen of Meena twice today.Thats a positive sign.Games are the cure for everything.That are like drugs .They can make you forget anything and everything.We’ve started to play clash royale.We left playing clash of clans for a number of reasons.Is clash royale our new dota.Lets see.I think i’ll probably do my post on meena.I’ll probably write a love story that she’ll never get .Just like the book were reading “To all the boyfriends ive ever had” .I dont remember the name of the auther. Im posting this in pitch darkness. Im seeing the keyboard from the light thats coming from the screen. Lets first do a post on Meena and then lets do our love letter.Both will be time consuming. How was our day ? today shrinidhi took the seminar.Well that was ok ishly average seminar.What do we think of tall girls. Are they attractive.Well for us height is not really a matter. I find shrinidhi attractive.It could be cause of her hair,Pony tail. Its very attractive when these girls turn their head and the orientation of hair changes and they have to make it right again.If they do that intentionally that’ll be bad.Dressing tells a lot about the person.Why are even talking about her.Its cause she talked to us.That is actually huge,for us.She asked me,From where i was ? My name suggests im telugu but i speak tamil. She asked from where i was and said her grand parents are also telugu but she speaks tamil.We are probably going to forget her.But NO,Let me tell why you wont forget her.She is the first girl in the collage to talk to you,(i.e,) to have a conversation and what did we do,our shyness, dont blame yourself.That would have been awkward.Okay now after a week we’ll forget her.What’s the whole point,It’s cherishing the moment.We feel happy for just the thought of thinking about the incident.I’m having this bad headache.Lets continue this later .

[haytin69]

2nd of March

This was poted on 3rd.Why? Ramki came to our room we had usual fun, forgetting everything else.These are what are very important to a healthy next day.We had a near sleepless night, we were thinking of our green technology presentation that we’re making in toonpow. Presentation of our engineering years. Lets try our best. We know we are not giving our 100%.But even a mediocre 60% can do magic. Hearing to a lot of sia.We’re moving away from meena.The frequency we check whether she’s online or not has reduced very drastically.So we should something we are soo immersed that we forget everything else.One such thing would be gaming.But not this time for me, Our mind is on the presentation. We hope it works out. Atleast some students and mam should say its good.I know its certainly good.Now dont brag about yourself.Thats a long time from now.One of the things we were good at was telling stories.Lets hope for the best,fingers crossed.No idea what that means.Well just like everyother girl we will never approach srinidhi or for that matter any other girl. We met gowtham, freshdesk placed tall guy.He is same as any other talented engineering student, who simply doesn’t like engineering. Well our english was sumar.But we have learnt to manage.That is a positive sign.We dreamt of joining freshdesk when they came to the collage,But we did not go past the write up.The only failed company,We got placed in the second one anyway.Why am i even writing this blog.I hope i dont forget the blog.This is a memoir.This post is turning out to be a below average one.I should have written this yesterday night.I had so much to write.But its okay.Better leave for class,have health ed.Cya(Meena style)

[haytin69]

1st of March

20 days to go to my birthday.Lets see what happens this time. I don’t want to celebrate my birthday at the same time i want someone to surprise me. Last year Vishwak got me the gamer poster .That was one birthday gift i got in long time.That was nice(really nice).That day i didn’t even realize that was my birthday and just like any other night i was jerking off(embarrassing but its the truth...face it).Finally the goa plan is capitalizing.I dont know id the word ’capitalizing’ is right in that context. But chill, you understand what i’m saying. Should ask mom the money for the train tickets.I was surprised how mom even accepted my goa trip almost instantly. Probably the whole build up to the moment we asked her was convincing. Anyway good for us ,we’re starting our travel phase with goa and with some one my good friends. These guys will probably be in different parts of the world , 4 years down the line.I’m using many words i never used ever in my life, in this blog. BTW i call my mom amma which later became mo-v. I’d like my daughter to call me pa.Don’t you think thats cool. If i’m gonna have a son that would be a slight disappointment.I 51-49 in the favor of a daughter.Daughter would be fun and challenging,raising a Son is boring.Why do we always come to this point where we have to discuss something about girls.Why???? For two years we were so into games that never noticed a girl.We almost never came online. We didn’t even have the necessity of having to put a net booster. That was our life,till as i have mentioned in a older post.After meena period is different,that’s all i can say for now.We’re dressing up for a girl? Well her name is shrinidhi. We also have this thing with girl names , we just dont prefer saying a girl’s name.Sengi even pointed this out one day and said it was “attulyam”. We keep referring yourself as we.It is because according to me ,another version of myself is talking to me ,that’ll make two of us, so “we”. Coming back,Approaching a girl looks like a difficult task.But why? We had confidence to rebel against a teacher, stand in front of thousands and campaign and win elections.You know you have so much of romance in you.But still why? is it coz of the way i was brought up, well it could be a combination of my bringing up and schooling.Well that does not stop me from approaching shrinidhi. The fear of embarrassment, rejection, ridicule.It is not like were falling in love with her. We’re just going to talk to a girl its same as talking to a stranger in this case a girl.My singlehood feeling is not letting me do that.Maybe its too late.All this thought is just heating my mind. Lets sleep.    

[haytin69]

29th February

Whooa just realised this day comes once in 4 years. Today was a ridiculous day.How desperate are we for a NE girl. Well shaadi.com level desperate. Embarrassing huh? yup. Im regretting my decision of going to that site. What else happenend today... Goswami was happy as fuck. Goswami , well you never know whom you remember. Lets talk about him. How did we meet? I don’t remember. Probably in kamadhenu hostel. After that we were classmates for 2 semesters. Interesting person. Childish and good. He’s in the ‘I want a girl to love stage’. That has cost him a lot(10 arrears).Why did he go down that path, well i think the wrong friends. I don’t know. I shouldn’t say that.I am trying to avoid writing about this.But simply cant. Meena properly messaged me, Now that was good(relief). As we have decided that she would just be a friend,the thought process has been easy to a certain extent.Why do i start blabbering when this topic comes up.No idea. Thought of doing some proper blogging. But probably not today.From tomorrow.March it will be...Have class 8 45 better to sleep. Though i wont be sleeping even after laying on the bed.Sometimes it takes time to sleep.Probably coz of messed up sleep cycle or is it because of the thoughts.Thoughts just dont let you sleep.Chill today was not a blogging day.I’ll compensate for this tomorrow by posting something really interseting.Should start concentrating on project.

[haytin69]

28th February

Sunday, With no Vishwak and Ramki was booring as fuck.We found out the name of our mysterious girl but couldn’t find her on facebook. Today was soo booring we used omegle for .... i don’t know more than 1 hour. That was absolute waste of time. And we found movies are inspiration. We saw Kung Fu Panda 3. The movie was above average not soo moving. But had soo many good messages. Who am i? Am i my mom’s son; High school superstar; just every other collage last bencher , with a fairy tale job;a gamer;an artist....well the truth is i am all of these. All of these make me ,your useless high school education is a part of you, your lazy collage attitude is you, all these things make me. You have to feel happy for everything that has happened to you, Coz that is what makes you, and that is YOU. Movies have been and are my juice. I forgot that for a brief period. Ok now, Ani helped with the project. We have to do it seriously from now on. No day is useless, today was a sad and lonely day, but you are pumped for tomorrow and rediscovering your passion(exaggeration) for movies-your mental energy drinks(should have chosen better words).Kung fu panda 3 was awesometacular. I am positive this week will be fun. Atleast till my happiness energy gets depleted. Hope it gets filled up. Bye . Feeling Sleepy   

[haytin69]

26th Feb 2016

How was my day today? Good.We found that Meena was actually busy and not avoiding us.We have also brought her down to the level of a good friend, Which is good for me. Akila Swaminathan or whatever her name is messaged me.What i was thinking was extroverts and introverts.As an introvert whom do i find interesting extroverts or introverts? I might not have the answers.But i think maybe when it comes to relationships introverts are better,coz they don’t wanna hurt anyone but themselves . Let us see all the girls i was interested in my entire life till now.Let us go by impact. It is just difficult to give positions like 1 2 3 to them.Lets see ,we have Nithya , My gaming name,this blog is also named after her.Why did we like her,Or for that matter any girl i liked was because she was interesting, different and some skillful.And beautiful of course,or maybe cute.I have been criticized for the beauty part by many.Who else, Meena has played a crucial part of my life, She is definitely getting a chapter in my autobiography.It’ll be ‘before Meena’ and ‘after Meena’ in my life.She has opened up a new chapter in my life. Her post can wait.Now we had a little crush on both Divya and Divya Shree .Divya Shree was my UKG benchmate which she’ll would have certainly forgot. Divya was of course the school topper who was my gangmate’s (Suresh) one side love interest. Ragavi cannot be called crush.You know you have these childhood girlfriends.According to me they are best.That is the time when there are no barriers or expectations just cute friendships. Alamelu miss or should i call her alams was something different.We should probably do a teachers thing separately.So what drives me towards a girl , very small things like how good has she made her hair, when does she leave the class, whom does she talk to, smallest of the smallest things.One thing that is very very attractive is the smile, that was the sole thing behind our first crush.Our liking for thin girls so that you can lift her while kissing is also mentionable.Above all this she should be in the driver seat and intimidating, demanding in the case of Meena. That also is very important.We are new to this thing.Girls Socializing Relationships are all new and i have no idea of anything.Now i regret writing this post.Meaningless.That’ll be it for today i suppose.