Music has always been an introspective thing for me. Even more so now that songwriting is no longer about performance. Writing introspective songs allow you to be vulnerable, without blatantly revealing your deepest darkest secrets. Poetic license is an awesome way to tell a story in a way that lifts a weight, possibly hits home with someone going through similar feelings, but also gives you metaphor and fantasy you express the things you would rather keep private. My history with alcohol is a long one, but I have gone through periods of being "sober" over the years... and no, I don't mean in the British footballer way. I can't remember the guy's name who said "I gave up women and booze in 1976...it was the worst 20 minutes of my life'. I went years at a time. In those years I found other things to drown myself in. Work was a big one. Playing Rugby was an obsession for a while, playing in a band... all things that are harmless in their own right. The trouble is, these things became a crutch for me, as damaging as any drug. People may scoff at the idea of playing sport being as damaging as a drug. Well, I took it to the extreme. I weighed 75kgs when I started playing club rugby. Within 3 months I weighed 100kgs. I took Creatine, ate high protein , low fat foods, stopped drinking any caffeine and alcohol and packed on the weight. I was either at work, in the gym or on the rugby field... nothing else featured. My last season I didn't make a full game without injury. So, when my drinking started getting out of hand I came to the realization that none of this had anything to do with alcohol addiction. I stopped drinking as easily as I had every time before and started to address all those niggly issues I had repressed for years. To explain the " how "behind this would take a full book, but binge drinking and comfort eating stopped being an issue. I now happily have a few drinks when I am out socially without any fear of tipping back into binge drinking. This raises some serious questions for me about how society handles the issue of 'Addiction". It becomes all about the substance, or sex, or anger, and no-one every addresses the underlying issues. People use words like "Tough Love" and "Intervention' and label people. These things are the very reason recovery is so rare from "addictions". Johan Hari wrote a book called "Chasing the scream" in which he challenges the myths associated with addiction. In this book he states ;'The opposite of addiction is not sobriety, it is connection". I know this to have been true with me, and I see it with many others, but what is the conventional way to deal with an addict? Sit them down in front of all their loved ones and have them judge them and cast them out. Intervention they call it. Alienation is what it really is. The addiction becomes the only connection that addict can rely on. They may cave to pressure and go to rehab, where they are cut off from the world and that one trusty connection they have, and less than 20% will have lasting success. Yet that is what has been done over and over again for the last 85 years, even though it has such a low success rate. No-one has even considered changing their approach. I believe we need to drop the tough from tough love, recognize ourselves in those going through things that make them reach for a crutch, and understand you can't connect with anyone through judgement. Addiction is not a disease. Society is the thing that's sick, and addiction is a symptom. Check out Johan Hari's books, Ted talks, Instagram, and Youtube channel. He has done extensive research into addiction and mental health and I believe he will make a massive impact on the lives of those struggling with depression, addiction and other mental health issues.
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