it’s disgusting seeing him smile. so damn smug, even in those restraints, caught in the middle, in front of her and sam. allison’s stomach twists at the sight of it, ire wrestling to the surface, her blood broiling. if she weren’t so concerned of the consequences, of what could be done to dean behind that closed door, herself if this goes south; if she had it her way, that stupid little grin he gets would be cleaned of his face in his heartbeat. but she resits, a strong sense of will to hold herself back. nothing is worth compromising this, not even if it makes her feel better.
yet the game continues. he made his move, attacking a sensitive topic. dean. that four letter word neither were brave enough to speak. why do you love him ? because dean is somehow different. no, it’s more than that. why do you love him ? because of the way he looks at her even when she notices. it’s certainly not that simple. again, why do you love him ? because it’s easy to forget all else when he’s around her; because he doesn’t look at her like she’s a traumatized puppy after everything she’s told him; because they bring each other something they hadn’t had before, something akin to belonging. and that’s why. because it wasn’t about what they went through, it was more about what could be, the endless possibilities at the end of the tunnel. all they had to do was make a break for it.
❝ see, that’s the thing with you angels, ❞ she leans forward, bracing elbows on her knees. don’t get too close. ❝ you always think that there’s something to fix, even when there’s not. you always want to find the worse in things. you think just because he’s flawed that someone has to fix him, be it me or one of you. truth is, we’re all flawed and can’t be fixed, some more than others. ❞ like him, the damaged archangel. like her, like her brothers. she always looks at dean winchester as a mosaic compared to herself, perhaps tapped together but still holding up. ❝ so, no, he’s not a project. ❞
always the eyes that give things away, the stoic of faces always had that small sign within the gleam of their eyes, even him with his poise and held together statue, minute details there to reveal if one looked hard enough. compassion was there, 𝐇𝐎𝐖𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑, 𝐁𝐔𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐃 𝐃𝐄𝐄𝐏, 𝐍𝐎𝐖 𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐄𝐃, 𝐍𝐎𝐓 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐘. no room for it in this wretched world. a being of aged nature before him, wanting to save a species ever dooming themselves, overpopulating & polluting the once bountiful earth, taking for granted all the gifts of nature they’d been given---- that they were allowed to walk among paradise ; even if it would never be the promise paradise. restraint is held and he can’t say he’s not impressed. at some points he’s not even able to contain himself, nor his brother though he likes to think of himself as more calculated than his brother. 𝐌𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐒 & 𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐑-𝐌𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐒, 𝐒𝐋𝐎𝐖𝐋𝐘 𝐒𝐔𝐅𝐅𝐎𝐂𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐘 𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐎𝐅 𝐇𝐎𝐏𝐄 𝐑𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐈𝐄𝐃. it had to be a process, exhausting all hope wouldn’t give way to his plans, his agenda. it wasn’t so much as total annihilation of humans, not really even to draw his father out, because they were pawns, all of them. no one cared, no HIGHER POWER, exposing for all it was. extinction of the human race was not something he delved with lightly ; he rather enjoyed them bustling about their life so long as the venomous claws didn’t sink to far deeply into the roots of this planet. he continues to smile.
she ponders his question following suit, never was a reason put behind LOVE, it just simply was a law of fatal attraction. creatures always attracted to things that may not necessarily be what they’d intended. 𝐅𝐑𝐔𝐈𝐓 𝐎𝐅 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐔𝐍𝐁𝐄𝐊𝐍𝐎𝐖𝐍𝐒𝐓 𝐏𝐎𝐈𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐎𝐔𝐒 𝐓𝐑𝐄𝐄. the chains rattle gently as he adjusts his position within the chair, crossing his legs over, holding onto his knee, « hmmm.... » curiosity strikes true, she leads away, strays from the topic & it’s how he knows he’s struck something. he knows how she feels, he knows everything dean knows----- experienced it him or through deans position, the curse of being COMPLETE within true vessel, « struck a nerve, have we? »
a subtle composed shake of his head, « oh, no no no, that is where you are wrong dear allison. I do not want to how you say fix anyone? that is why we are here in this very moment. because we are flawed, 𝐖𝐄 𝐀𝐑𝐄 𝐀𝐋𝐋 𝐅𝐋𝐀𝐖𝐄𝐃, even God. » deepened chuckle as calloused digits interlock, « and I did not mean that kind of project, you have loved others throughout your time, have you not? he is just another one of them. tell me, you love him and he loves you, but does he matter? »
