From a collaboration in Louisiana with Jesse Brantman
Brace yourselves, I've been meaning to write about this for a long time.
So you’re going through an artistic crisis? I get it.
Maybe you came across a little bit of internet fame at a young age and now you feel old and unsatisfied. There’s no real platform for your work anymore, no real feedback. Do you post to instagram, where you get the most interaction but lose all image detail on a phone screen? Or maybe you share on tumblr where people just ‘like,’ and don’t really say much else? Or do you turn to facebook where you have to pay for fifteen people to see your poorly resized image? You certainly don’t go back to flickr, because it’s a reminder of what you’ve lost in a way. Besides, all of your comments on flickr these days are:
Great
Sexy
Cool pic please look at my stream greetings and love xo *insert photo of dolphin*
There’s no reward anymore. Everything you once had is missing now. Maybe you grew up a little spoiled, many great artists created with no affirmation and recognition only came after death. You had a passionate community from a young age, you had positive reinforcement, people were excited to see your work and you were excited to make it.
So how do you get excited again?
You go through weird phases with your work these days that may look like this,
1. You make nothing
2. You make work that sucks and mimics your old, successful work
3. You make new stuff that feels cool but doesn’t feel like you
4. You make nothing
5. You reevaluate your creative approach, you try:
-Planning rather than trying to create a photo on a whim like you usually do.
-Choosing different subject matter. You stray away from self portraits and try shooting other people, you start doing miniatures, or maybe you take pictures of bird houses, I don’t know, you’re experimenting.
-Shooting in new locations, in a studio or in an alleyway instead of a forest.
6. You decide to do another 365 project, or a 52 weeks, but you’re too busy and most of the photos suck and it makes you feel worse.
7. You make work and hide it from everyone, it sits in a folder on your computer and you revisit it every so often. It’s like a fun secret but not always satisfying.
8. You feel irrelevant and that worries you. You want to post often and stay in the game but you don’t have anything to share.
9. You are bored.
So how do you get a second wind? How do you compete with younger you who loved photography with all of your being and created daily and had a blast? There are two schools of thought about stirring up inspiration:
1. Inspiration needs to find you working. Create and create and then it will come. Don’t wait around for it.
2. Create when it feels right.
I begrudgingly believe in number one. Even though creating when you don’t even know what you’re doing feels a little futile, it eventually works out. Either you find inspiration, or you find a new direction. I think you need to work the muscle, but don’t put so much pressure on it. A bad photo isn’t the end of the world and doesn’t need to be shared. The masters of drawing and painting did tons sketches and studies before creating their own masterpieces. You need to seek inspiration and not be afraid to use it. Practicing isn’t copying. You love a photographer’s fashion work? Practice their lighting styles, their editing style, become more comfortable posing and working with models. Hone your skills and make it your own. Obviously if you share this work, a nod to the artist is appropriate. But it’s okay to make work that you don’t share that gets tucked away into the archive, like an assignment you’ve given yourself to grow.
Develop a new relationship with your work, you aren’t a super human and can’t compare yourself to those who are constantly releasing content. It’s okay that you haven’t created in a while, that you haven’t posted in a few weeks. A web presence is important but it is not make or break. Don’t be ashamed of your absence, wouldn’t you feel worse if you knew you were sharing work you didn’t even like?
Be patient with yourself. Take bad photos, take good photos, take incredible photos.
Cry when you look at the back of the camera and realize you’ve finally made something genuinely you.
You’re older, you have higher standards now, not every image with bokeh and a hair flip will tickle your fancy, you know better now.
You are better than that young, passionate photographer because now you have the skills and perspective they didn’t have. You aren’t old and washed up, your audience has changed, your environment has changed, your availability has changed, but you still have it in you. You just need to work harder now to get the adrenaline rush that is getting the photo. You aren’t as easily impressed these days and that’s good, it’s good to grow, and I promise it’s worth it.
So make quietly if you aren’t satisfied, loudly if you are. Don’t be afraid to make it a private process. People will leave, unfollow, stop caring, but those who truly love your work will stick around during your growing pains. Remember that your art is for you and that every other element is just excess, just a bonus. Become the best you first and the rest follows.
