energy evades her clare should consider herself LUCKY. had her own day been better, the sergeant’s likely to scold her younger sister for her reckless behaviour. but catherine is drained, both physically and emotionally, and any attempt at a lecture would do nothing to aid the matter. not when she feels incapable of forming a coherent sentence. instead, she relishes the silence that washes over the sisters like a wave, and waits it out. clare rarely keeps anything from her older sister; catherine just needs to know when not to push the subject.
a cigarette burns between the sergeant’s fingers, forgotten, unwanted; she just doesn’t have the taste for them tonight. truth be told, she’s unsure of why she’d thrown herself head first over the edge, once again overpowered by the pull of the dreadful ADDICTION. one final drag, and the cigarette is tossed carelessly to the ground, the eldest sister watching quietly as the final embers flicker and fade. a cautious glance is thrown clare’s way, and it pains catherine so to see her sister in such distress.
she’s near certain the conversation has drawn to and end when clare finally cracks. lips part, eyebrows raise, head lolls to one side catherine gapes at the other woman in SHOCK. so certain she’d been, that neil would be the one to finally offer her sister the happiness she so greatly deserved. yes, how certain, and how WRONG she’d been.
“ bastard. ” it bleeds past lips that curl into a sneer. she’s furious at the thought that anyone could deceive her sister in such a way a woman so innocent, only wishing to see the best in people, and to care for those that love her so dearly. catherine had been wary of neil at first, but had grown to tolerate him, if only for clare’s sake. how IDIOTIC she’d been. from day one, the sergeant was aware of neil’s past ( how could she have allowed a man so reliant on SELF-DESTRUCTION, nothing more than a trigger, to steal the heart of her baby sister ).
“ i’ll kill him, i swear. ” it’s an empty threat; she’d never behave in a manner so reckless. but the intention is there, and she supposes that’s enough. another cigarette is lit, despite her lack of want. her free arm is thrown haphazardly around her sister, who trembles against the bitter, winter winds. catherine pulls clare too her, cheek coming to rest upon the top of her sister’s head, a half-hearted attempt at comforting the younger woman.
The youngest is quiet after Catherine shuts up. Her head is throbbing but it’s not like she can do much about it. She’s felt the pain before, not just the rejection but the dizziness that came with the necessary addiction of drinking. First this, then that- what more could happen? She’s already ripped apart her promise to Catherine about the drinking ending for good- every alcoholic was like that but not her. Even with the years of rehabilitation, perhaps she needed to take a break and isolate herself by going back. Sure, it was a drink (or two) but she could feel the urge to want another and another at this moment despite the sisterly moment they were attempting to have. Normally she was one who was all over for affection, whether it be picking off fuzzes off the elder’s uniform or hugging.
After resting her head down on the others shoulder for a brief moment, she says something she’d NEVER say sober-- “I don’t deserve ‘im anyways, I’m probably one ta have no family life, Catherine. I’m bloody fourty five- “ It’s always been this way, but perhaps Clare was RIGHT this time. “I’ll just live with ya foreva...”
Her own words made herself laugh, not a real one. Although not much had been seen with her tea- Clare had downed it all, finding it a substitute for the desired alcohol her body wanted. She wasn’t one to speak, nor spill out her feelings like this anymore towards her sister, for pete’s sake she was an adult. Her body doesn’t stop quick enough when she stands from her spot. Foot barely moves and yet makes a turn enough for her body to almost collapse right there, but she catches herself briefly- smashing the mug against steps. A heavy sigh leaves her lips now. Emotional pain doesn’t even come close to the the physical one she’s now got sticking throughout her hand.
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