Just a fucked up stan: I should prolly get help xD

Eyyy, welcome, you can call me rose ^~^ I'm an 18 yr old bi female with she/them pronouns. I'm pretty sure what I have is unhealthy but I've seen worse and I know eventually I'll grow out of it (as I have with other obsessions I had) so might as well enjoy/document my slow slide into insanity atm I'm am obsessed with !AH and more specifically Ryan Haywood (can't forget about Jeremy tho, battle buddies for life yo. also team love n' stuff is everything) so I'll be posting clips/pics from streams or lets plays and any other RT content I like x3. ( also will prolly end up posting some stuff not having anything to do with RT too sometimes, I have that right lol)

[alexxthebitch]

This is just an excuse to stare at a picture of Ryan without feeling like super creepy.

[ahfangal]

This is just AMAZING!!!! I love this. Also, any excuse to stare at Ryan is good…

[hey-its-ya-boy-rose]

God. Danm. You. Why is this SO PERFECT <3 (it's so perfect I still feel creepy) keep being amazing OP

[hey-its-ya-boy-rose]

I finally did it Mah

Finally passed my final GED test after months of struggling on math, I honestly still cant belive I've done it but it feels so good

[hey-its-ya-boy-rose]

He's so pretty with that warm smile ^~^ , even if the quality of the pic sucks x3 <3

[hey-its-ya-boy-rose]

Its 1:41 am. And no one is awake

Its 1:41 am... and i've just finished creating the most delicious half double chocolate and half chocolate peanut butter brownies with whipped cream and chocolate mousse, and I have absolutely no one to share it with. I'm so sad no one is here to witness this work of art with me

[homo-sex-shoe-whale]

I hate it when I say “suck my dick” and people say “oH bUt yOu DoN’t hAvE a DiCk” you fools. Blithering idiots. I mean my soul dick. My metaphorical penis. I don’t have a physical penis protruding from my body but the aura is there. Suck my spirit dick, peasant.

[whats-she-gonna-post-next]

I love Ryan Haywood, I love him so so much. How does a man manage to be so creepy yet so god damn sweet at the same time? Like… I would let him murder me, but I also feel like he wouldn’t want to murder me…? Like fuck. This man has fucked me up in such a weird way..? Fuck he’s amazing.

[hey-its-ya-boy-rose]

[geoarchcn]

“Why does everyone scream as soon as I run by?”

[mothqes]

adhd things no-one really talks about

- skewed sense of time eg; i can easily get there and back before my eggs cook!

- altered sense of reality//tendency to get sucked up in daydreams and temporarily lose track of real life

- extremely vivid daydreams// alternative realities

- feeling really lonely but getting the urge to isolate yourself for no reason

- getting overwhelmed by too many choices and freaking out

- hearing the instructions but not really being able to hold onto them

- people cant speak to you while you’re really focused on something because you can’t hold on to multiple things in your brain at once

- repeating things over and over in your head to try and remember them

- feeling like you never really appreciate things as much as you should because you get too sidetracked

- getting super excited by small things but sometimes feeling indifferent towards the things everyone’s raving about

- being self conscious from everyone telling you you’re annoying but being scared you’ll come off as boring

- getting hyperfixations on a certain person and getting really wrapped up on them regardless of if they like you back

- putting too much into things and getting disappointed when it’s not reciprocated

- constantly being told that you’re too intense and need to chill it out a bit

- ^ thinking you’re cool and desperately wanting to just be chill and laid back but your personality is just 24/7 overdrive

- building things up so much in your head to the point that it gets stressful because what if it doesn’t live up to expectations??

- extremely over-emotional (this includes when it’s inappropriate such as giggling at sad things and then feeling really bad after)

- feeling when you just don’t know when to stop

- getting increasingly uncomfortable in a situation for no apparent reason until you feel like you’re gonna cry or scream but you do none of that and just sit there

feel free to add on!

[thethoughtbubble122]

Repeating to remember is such a mood, I’ll go into the kitchen to get water and food and put the water by the doorway, then spend the entire time it takes to prepare the food repeating “remember the water” in my head so I leave with both food and water. Then I forget my phone

[hey-its-ya-boy-rose]

All of these things are so true, it's hard for me to stay in reality sometimes and I feel like I get way more emotionally involved or attached to stuff that others might not care about, that's why I can't handle"cringe" or why when I start to read something I enjoy it over takes my life until I let it go cold turkey. I have so much love for anyone who struggles with ADD, stay strong and don't ever stop being you <3

[hey-its-ya-boy-rose]

Eggplant Education 🍆

[naturallyvicious]

The top 10 ragehappy fics: February 2018

In 2018: Top 10 most popular ragehappy fanfics posted* on Ao3, sorted by month and kudos, as of January 1st, 2019. Once again thanks to Missy for letting me have a go at this <3

February- (kudos cut off: 167)

1. Morning Light by whalehuntingboyfriends (Fantasy AU, mevinseg, 154K, WIP) 469

2. I’m head over heels for you, and that’s fine by lunalou (Sky Factory AU, Mavin, 4K, Comp.) 341

3. Welcome Aboard by SeaMonkeysInSpace ( Several AU’s, Jackeoff, 36K, WIP) 324

4. If I Only Had a Soul by kippers (Angel & Demons AU, Jeremy/Gavin/Ryan, 92K, WIP) 200

5. The Way The World Ends by whalehuntingboyfriends (Zombie AU/ Walking Dead AU, Mavin, 105K, WIP) 223

6. Into the Blue by CrystalInstinct (Modern Setting AU, Freewood - Tuggey, 57K, Comp.) 255

7. Two Halves Of My Rainbow by Waffle-o (FAHC/Soulmate AU, Jeremy/Gavin/Ryan, 18K, WIP) 195

8. Fuck A Fake (Fan) by destroyedspectacularly (FAHC, Battle Buddies, 4K, Comp.) 184

9. Borderline by rebelwriter6561 (FAHC, Raywood, 83K, WIP) 170

10.Instinct by NoelEnough (FAHC, Ryan/Reader - Ryan/OC’s, 76K, Comp.) 167

@funfahcts care to comment? cause i have none bc brain mush but also look i did another 

*I used two methods when searching for these but human error is a thing that could have happened. So this is to the best of my knowledge. Also if you read any of these remember to read warnings/tags & don’t forget to at least leave a kudo friends! Happy reading.

[hey-its-ya-boy-rose]

Eggplant Education 🍆

[hey-its-ya-boy-rose]

All hail Ryan, King of the THICCness!

I loved today's video but this (and one other clip, woo. nwn ) were my probably my favorite parts and I felt like sharing <3

[cyans-stardust]

Reblog Fredo-Chan for a year of good luck

[achieverooster]

LISTEN UP

RYAN WOULD GIVE THE BEST HUGS EVER

LIKE YOU SEE THESE FUCKERS? 

THOSE ARE GOD DAMN LUMBERJACK ARMS 

AND LET ME TELL YOU THEY WOULD LOOK GOOD WRAPPED AROUND YOUR WAIST 

[spookyslytherinn]

my dream is to get a hug from him at rtx

[hey-its-ya-boy-rose]

Eeey so I'm not the only one who's had this dream? x.x

[hey-its-ya-boy-rose]

The worst, best dream ever.

I fell asleep.. and suddenly I was in like an auditorium or like a huge room with glossy wood panelled floors, it felt like a convention with lots of people and with booths. Suddenly a voice over a loud speaker urges people to move to a certain place, so I go. And who do I see in the midst of this crowd of people, of course, Ryan Haywood- he was wearing Jean's and a light grayish-blue t-shirt and of course a backwards cap. And of course since it's a dream I walk up to him without any hesitation and without any anxiousness and I guess we start talking, I cant remember what it was about, it all just sounded like muffled nonsense. After a couple moments of talking I guess I ask for a hug because he nods his head yes and then opens his arms for me and I receive this warm allmost overwhelmingly nice hug that makes me feel so so safe, it doesnt last very long and after it's over we talk for a couple more moments and then I hear this voice over the loud speaker demanding that we move to a new location in this huge room we are in. As I get to where the voice had told me to go I see him again (which isint suprising cuz we were just in 1 room no matter how big it is he didnt just disappear lol but it was a dream so It doesn't have to make sense) and once I see him he sees me and he waves with a faint smile and I wave back and head over to him and when I get to him he says somthing along the line of "boy this is kinda strange, want another hug while we wait?" And I just nod my head yes and he opens his arms again for me, again the hug is so warm and comforting and it just makes me feel so safe and wanted. When it was over the booming voice that came from the loud speaker told us to move on again to some new part of the room, after this though my awareness of what was happening became stronger and I realized that I was in a dream and my mission for the rest of the dream was to hug Ryan again.... which never ended up happening again cuz after i became more aware and i was actually searching for Ryan my brain thought that was the best time to start shifting and taking me to new places inside of this building that I'd never been to and blah blah blah i never saw him again.

TLDR: in my dream I got to hug Ryan twice and I've never felt safer and more accepted than In that moment and I spent the rest of the dream searching him out never finding him.

I find it very hilarious that my brain could have dreamt about ANYTHING, even something WITH Ryan and yet my brain chose the very wholesome and kind thing to makeup for me and that was hugs. Fricken hugs. Idk what that means exactly but all I know is that I'm a sad person and I should prolly get this worked out lol

[angel-vein-blog]

Me: good morning

My brain at 6:57am: you should have killed yourself when you were 15