The Gift of My Average Life
I want to start by saying that I am okay with my okay life and I am not being complacent, I am just generally content. I am not a perfect person and I still from time to time look for more things and experiences in life but if there is one thing I realized living the average life, it is that knowing full well that we are all on different journeys and things could take time.
There were some phases in my life where I would think my life is so average. In grade school, I didn’t have the shiniest pair of shoes but my shoes weren’t the shabbiest one either. In high school, my phone was not the high-end one but it wasn’t the cheapest either. When I graduated from college (in other parts of the world like Australia, it’s normally referred to as university or uni), my graduation dress wasn’t the best one, but it wasn’t the worst either. As of writing, the only thing I remember that wasn’t average was my makeup for my graduation photo —it sucked. If I had to be honest, my makeup for my college yearbook photo sucked, too. It’s safe to say that I am making up for the wasted time and foundation for using it wisely and efficiently now.
Then, at the ripe age of 25, I realized that looking back and analyzing where I am now, I really do live the average life. I remember when I was finishing my Bachelor’s degree, we were asked to write the story of our lives for a TV adaptation and it dawned on me that I live a boring life — waking up, taking a bath, preparing to go to school, etc. It. Was. So. Boring. I am not saying this to romanticize my average life, but I realized I have never been given too much nor too little, but I was and still am given enough. I wish I was given more time to appreciate it more back then. It took me years to realize that the normalcy of my life is a gift, especially in seeing things in black, in white, and in between.
Realizations, realizations
With the realization that I live a normal average life came the realization that I see balance. I have been able to travel but not as much or not as less as other people and it keeps me grounded. I have sinned and have been wronged but being in both situation makes me neither a satan or the saint as we all just sin differently. I have worked too much and have not worked at all but it does not necessarily mean that when you work you are productive and it does not always follow that when you do not work, you are lazy. I could go on and on with how different I see things now, but it all comes down to the full confidence that I don’t see things in black and white now, at least most of the time.
When I thought of writing this, being the perpetual worrier that I am, I also had assumptions of what people think of this. Some might say I am humble to admit that I have more than enough and some might say I am arrogant because I am too #blessed in their eyes for me to say that I only have enough. I don’t wake up everyday on a lake house with six Mercedes SL parked in my front yard, but I don’t sleep on a cold floor either. I live comfortable, but not Crazy Rich Asians comfortable, and I am fine with it.