woke up with a monster

[hiiyakai]

jolaughlin‌:

Where these moments should have been soft, eased some of their pain, they only left a tightness in her chest she couldn’t quite describe, an agony she wished would end. The awkward silence drug on, but then her brother started again and she started to lose her battle against the tears stinging at her eyes. “Kai, I’m begging you -” and she didn’t get to finish before he finished his own explanation. It was funny, the unspoken truth hurt more, even the silence had been better than that. “But I wasn’t. I never could have been, and I never will be.” She thought saying it out loud might make it easier, show she understood, but instead it left her feeling more suffocated than ever.  “You’re happy.” A fact, something she could say with ease. “I’m happy that you’re happy.” Another fact, though this one was even harder to say. “ - I’m begging you to let me focus on that, Kai. Please just let me focus on that.” 

Her response stole the breath from his lungs, but there was a lingering sense of justice in the way he felt the air thin. There was no peace, no -- if anything, the heretic was filling with red hot fury. It upped his temperature a notch but not a single notion of it showed on his face. “It wasn’t fair,” he offered coldly, though the harshness in his tone was not directed toward anyone present. To expect that kind of support, even from someone’s twin... it should have never been her burden, and he saw that now. “For either of us.” Her closing statement was chilling, and his blue eyes are flashing up to search hers. “Are...” he began, lips left parted in uncertainty. “... are you?” He feared the answer, no matter which direction it took, because he knew it would have nothing to do with him. He was already feeling empty; hollowed out and numb. 

[hiiyakai]

brokenbcnnett‌:

“Not going to fight me for it?” she teased, raising an eyebrow as she leaned over and pressed a kiss to his cheek. “Not going to try and talk me out of it?”

“You’re looking for a fight?” he mused with a short bout of laughter. “I see, I see. Well --” He paused, smacking his lips together dramatically. “I think I should be the one who gets to kill him. No take backs.”

[hiiyakai]

elegilbert‌:

Despite her eagerness to have her friend and her husband back, and understanding that things were never going to be the same, Elena still found herself filled with unwavering optimism when it came to the hope that the heretic would go to dinner with her. It was all she had, and she clung to it for all that she was worth. That didn’t mean that his acceptance didn’t come as a surprise to the doppelganger, and it was more than obvious. “Really?” She felt like a fool™ the instant she asked, but she didn’t wait for a response, too afraid that he’d change his mind given time to think over the proposition. “Great.” There’s a nod and her smile gets just a little smaller. “It’ll be nice to be able to have dinner with someone again… the kids are all so busy anymore… ” Shaking her head, and swallowing it up like she had everything else lately, she forced herself to focus on the good. “ - I just really appreciate it. Maybe next time Bonnie can come too.”

That glimmer of doubt, and the soft way she had asked for confirmation not a moment after, brought him an odd sense of.. satisfaction. It was a part of who he was to be the mysterious Gemini outcast, ever so elusive in his decisions, so it was kind of nice to see her be just as lost as he was. He didn’t know her, and the Kai she knew was gone. This was new to the both of them, and the thought was comforting. He wasn’t in it all by himself. “We can’t have that,” he said without really thinking about it. Strip away everything about their situation and bear-bone the fact he wasn’t fond of the idea of someone having to to spend an evening alone. But thoughts wandered to Bonnie -- the woman he knew he would be spending his evenings with. Her opinion mattered, her input. So he said nothing more on the matter. Instead he wore a rather confident grin, rearing and ready bottled up and put on display as his expression of choice. “Let’s paint the town red.” 

[hiiyakai]

brokengcmini‌:

“Don’t.” She was blunt, and to the point. She wanted to stop him before he could start, but it was too late, things were already in motion, and by the time she finally got it out, the damage was already done. His words stung, hurting her in a way she couldn’t quite explain. He was just explaining himself, speaking his truth, but it didn’t change the inevitable but hanging over the statement. But she wasn’t enough. She’d known she’d failed him, she’d done nothing but think about it ever since her brother had sunk a hunting knife into her gut back in ninety-four. She was reminded by it every day he was gone, every time she thought she saw him in a room where he couldn’t have been, or knowing he was half a world away from where she was and she wanted nothing more than to see him, and knowing she couldn’t. “I’m happy for you.” A brief pause as she blinked back tears, swallowing hard as she looked at her brother. “Let me be happy.”

Standing there seemed foreign, as if he was an intruder in his own skin. This plane of existence was no home to him. He swallowed hard, watching her face intently, but frozen all the same. His lips had parted when she spoke -- not necessarily in protest. If anything, he hadn’t the faintest idea what he had to say in reply. She cut him off, saving him the stumble. In some twist of fate it even calmed him some. But that did little to stop the statement that followed. “But I was better.” Out of everyone he could have prodded for information, limited pool or not, he had to know what she thought. If this other version of him held some semblance of the brother she once knew; the one she thought had been worth fighting for. “You prefer him over me.”

[hiiyakai]

brokenbcnnett‌:

She watched his smile grow, and she felt her own growing to compete with his own. Seeing the heretic relax, the two of them falling into their normal stride reminded her that this was her home now. Not the bed, not even the physical structure they were in, but, much to her own surprise,  the company of Kai Parker was where she felt most at home. The gentle kiss, and the feeling of security she felt when he squeezed her hand only helped remind her of the fact. “I’d don’t know what I’d do without you.” Squeezing his hand gently, the vampire confessed that simple fact she was almost sure he already knew. “And as soon as I kill Wes, we can do whatever you want. Bennett’s honor.”

“You kill Wes,” he repeated, as if the subject was far more interesting than the matter at hand -- that it was her calling dibs that he was trying to draw skepticism toward. Nothing else was added after it. No, he was no stranger to keeping his cool. Playing his cards right was what he did. “We can do whatever we want, whenever we want.”

[hiiyakai]

brokenbcnnett‌:

“I guess you have a point.” There was a brief pause as the Bennett thought better of it. “Surprisingly.” At his next question, the witch couldn’t help but smirk, because she knew the answer without a moments thought. “I take my chances, especially when I know I’m holding all the cards.” Which, more or less was true. She did feed him, helped stabilize the prison world together where they were currently existing, and held the key to his freedom. Though, there was at least one key element she didn’t have: a way to wake Elena up without sacrificing herself. Though, if things didn’t pan out like she hoped, that might not be an issue she’d have to worry about anyway. “Not with an attitude like that.” As if she’d ever let him out. As if he’d ever do something that would make her trust him for a millisecond without those chains on. As if she’d ever set him loose to wreak havoc on the world. A few months ago, all of that would have been enough to knock some sense into her, but as the weeks passed, and her progress fell to a snail’s pace, she had begun to think of alternative solutions, as heinous as they seemed. “Well, I’ll need to make a plan. This is more of Caroline’s specialty… but unfortunately for me, and fortunately for her, you’ve got me.” Training your pet heretic restraint didn’t exactly have a handy how-to book to reference. “Any suggestions?”

“So, that’s a yes,” he answered for her, grinning slyly. Playing it safe didn’t seem like Bonnie’s kind of game. She burned too hot for that. He wouldn’t be breathing if she played it safe. This wasn’t sentiment. This wasn’t even the fact that she couldn’t let go a chance at waking up her friend. No, this gamble was his life, his freedom, and her vengeance. Bonnie Bennett was holding all the cards, and the game was far too sweet for her to let go. Risk and all. “Is my pessimism putting you off your fun?” He asked with a playful pout. “Plan, shman. We continue on as normal. If I bite too hard, you fry my brain and I go hungry for the day. What’s there to figure out?” 

[hiiyakai]

brokenbcnnett‌:

After she said her piece, she simply looked at him and waited anxiously. She wanted nothing more than to be an anchor for him, just as he had been for her. Ever since they’d gotten out of the lab, he’d been everything for her, and she simply wished to do the same for him. Though, the silence between them that followed her answer left her wondering if she did something wrong. Had she said too much, or not enough? But then he offered one word, two syllables, but it was enough for her. “Okay.” Her tone was soft, unsure what that one little word really meant. She watched his face for any signs, but then came his second word, and a smile paired with a tone that warmed her heart. “And if you ever forget, I’ll be right here to remind you.” Now that was offered with a small smile, the hand not intertwined with his reaching up to touch his face. “Anytime, any place.“ As a final gesture, she leaned over and kissed him gently. "You’ll always have me.”

His lip twitched slightly in a smile when she repeated the word. It grounded him to hear it. An unspoken resolve in the way their voices rang out to meet the others. That smile, wild and bright as he had always managed to be, grew -- and he’s meeting her eyes with the same life. “Okay,” he said with more louder and with more conviction; an irony to it, playful. He met her kiss with the same softness she offered, his smile not fading. His hand in hers tightened warmly. “As long as that means we move forward, together.”

[hiiyakai]

brokenbcnnett‌:

“It’s what makes this so interesting.” It wasn’t a lie, but the honesty in the comment made her smirk subside into something weaker. Though she did let her mind wander from time to time from their normal push and pull. Sometimes, sitting in the dimly lit karaoke bar with the heretic, she even found herself thinking that she might just know him better than she knew herself. “Surprising considering almost every time you’ve been placed in an all or nothing situation, you’ve ended up with nothing.” His first attempt to force the merge, his attempt to mend their relationship, and losing his freedom even after he’d crawled his way out of literal hell. He did win sometimes though, like in the merge with his brother, and at his sister’s wedding, and as much as she hated to admit it, with his revenge against her. She did say almost every time. “But, if you insist, lets get going, shall we?”

“Good doesn’t necessarily mean rational,” he mused in response, finding amusement in her more than fair assessment. “I’m a sucker for high stakes. Do you consider yourself a gambler, Bonnie?” It was one of Kai’s more glaring flaws. He couldn’t just have his way -- no, there was always a flashier, more satisfying end. Self-indulgence was just something he couldn’t let go. “I’m not going anywhere,” he teased her, flashing a grin. “Your move.”

[hiiyakai]

brokengcmini‌:

Jo listened silently as he offered his insight, and as happy as she was for him, she couldn’t help but feel hurt knowing he hadn’t felt that before, and she hated it. “… I’m happy for you.” she finally managed to offer her brother, though she couldn’t offer him a smile or anything similar to accompany the words, if anything there was something sad behind it all. “I’m glad someone was finally able to do that for you.”

Her words hurt him, and he strained to understand why. They should have come to him as a welcomed reprieve from their push and pull. His relationship with his twin was always hot and cold. Fire and ice. This was smoke and shallow breathes. Suffocating on the thin oxygen left between them. “I wanted --” he began, voice hitched in his throat as sad eyes met their counterpart. “You, Jo. I wanted you to be enough.” But it wasn’t. The coldness of their childhood home was anything but comfort, no matter how much his twin had tried. It was easier now, to look back at how hard she had fought to fill those dark spaces with light -- to consume the terror and pain. In the end it only left him feeling even more hollow than before, watching just how easily his other half could sacrifice herself for such an unwanted creature. 

[hiiyakai]

madscientistmcxfield‌:

“If there’s one thing you aren’t, Kai, it’s agreeable. Plus, your not exactly a prize.” the scientist deadpanned. “It’s more likely Elena just doesn’t want to lose her best friend. You know, since last time you were the reason they spent years apart. Sleeping beauty spell and all." 

“How you can say that with a straight face, I’ll never get.” In reference to him not being a prize. It didn’t matter what side you were one -- where you leaned on the morality scale. Having Kai Parker dead, alive, or romantically, was a god damn token. “Hey -- I’m like, eighty percent sure I didn’t put a gun to Gilbert’s head when we tied the knot.”

[hiiyakai]

damndcmon‌:

“I’m just saying when you got out of your prison world, within a few months you were the leader of the stupid coven, and within a few months of getting stuck in another prison world you managed to get out, ruin your sister’s wedding and kill the entire coven.” The vampire shrugged his shoulders as he spoke, almost as if he really was disappointed by it all. “And you got your ass out of hell, and you not only managed to get out of it by cutting a deal with Cade, but also tried to kill your nieces in a matter of days. Sorry if I’m a little underwhelmed by how boring you’ve become.”

The blast from the past brought a smile to the heretic’s face. At least, that was the plan -- to make it look like he was beaming at his past accomplishments. If anything, he couldn’t care less what the elder Salvatore had to say about them. “You really think I’m left empty handed...” he mused, mocked disbelief in his quiet tone. “Out of prison world three.. an entire town eating out of my hands. My actual dream girl.” There was something hidden in his gaze. “I think you’re leaving out the good stuff on purpose, Damon.”

[hiiyakai]

brokengcmini‌:

“Thats because it is your home, or Bonnie’s house that you just crash in.” She tried to keep it light, friendly, but she couldn't deny how awkward it was being in a room with her brother, even after everything else. “…. What do you think a home should feel like?”

He hadn’t thought that far ahead. When she asked for clarification, or perhaps.. just for more information, he wondered if he had anything left to give. Kai considered the question -- breaking their eye contact to let his gaze drift in thought. “Warm,” he tested, weighing the word on his tongue. “Like I belong here. I’m.. wanted.”

[hiiyakai]

madscientistmcxfield‌:

“Why do you think I do it?” He couldn’t help but wear a satisfied smirk as he looked at the heretic. “So, how’s the wife? The family? The girlfriend? Tell me all about it.”

“Surprisingly.. tame, all things considered,” came his lax response, taking advantage of the question to respond with an all too playful scenario. “Shouldn’t they be fighting over it by now?  Like, in mud -- or pudding?” Kai huffed in thought. “Maybe I’m just too agreeable.” 

[hiiyakai]

damndcmon‌:

“Really? Because I’m pretty sure you’ve had months to make your move.” Months he’d spent on other things. “For an all powerful heretic, you’re kind of a let down.”

“My creative process is a bit more complicated than getting smashed and sticking my teeth in the nearest heartbeat,” he purred almost too casually, “But pardon me for leaving you wanting.” 

[hiiyakai]

damndcmon‌:

“Shouldn’t you be terrorising a whole new generation of geminis right about now?”

“Haven’t the time,” he resigned with a soft hum -- sighing.

[hiiyakai]

lockwolftm‌:

“Look, I know I haven’t been around, but in my defense, I wasn’t totally convinced that you weren’t going to try and seperate me from any of my vital organs.”

“Point taken,” he said with a slow nod, assessing the situation as quickly as one lone heretic could. “Also a very fair assumption. I’m guessing.. I should have a reason not to?”

[hiiyakai]

madscientistmcxfield‌:

“Kai, it’s a pleasure as always…”

“You know you give me the tingles when you say things like that.”