Engineering🌻

20 f Uk🌻

[hithereworldhowareyou]

This time last year...

This time last year I asked for my winter exams to go well and a nice boy...

you know what, both of those happened but I also got heartbreak. The boy was so short lived and just left s few scars behind. So this year I’m asking for good grades (still needed ofc) and an incredibly happy year full of love. I would like the love but without the scars and without the tears and the self-doubt and shoving myself into a cut-out of who I thought I needed to be to fit into someone else’s life. 

To 2020, the year of love!

[nspiration-deactivated20211007]

[snazzattack-blog]

[lesangbelle-deactivated20120320]

[hithereworldhowareyou]

Jealousy

I am not jealous of the girls throwing themselves at you tonight- when you glance at me to check I am ok and shake them off. I am not jealous of the girl you act friendly with at a party but then message me instead. 

I am jealous of the girls that have made a mark in your life. I am jealous of the ex who has left you a little reserved, who has made you on edge that I will be mad when you talk to other girls in front of me. She is the one that you have pictures of on your phone, the one that shared all of your first year at uni. She has a permanent place in your heart. 

I am jealous of the girl after me who you will be vulnerable and open with. The girl you won’t be reserved about will give her everything. It breaks my heart to imagine you with her, as we are now, wrapped up in a duvet, chatting about nothing and me somehow coming up- “oh there was a girl for a little while” and I will just be a tiny part of your memory, probably not worth mentioning. 

[hithereworldhowareyou]

A pep talk to myself

Hey, 

I know this year has made you count yourself. It has made you doubt your academic abilities- is engineering even for me? You feel so damn out of place all the time and it feels like everyone is constantly looking down at you. It feels like there is no point trying to figure this material out because you’ll never really understand it as well as all the guys in your class anyways. You’ve had the best year of your life but it has made you doubt yourself more than ever. 

Well, what can I say to make you feel better? What can I say to counter all the crippling doubt? I believe in you. You do have it in you to learn all this material and understand it and do really fucking well in your exams. You have it in you. You are doing your own thing, forget everyone else, just focus on yourself. xxx

Good luck bub x

[secretrussianfolder]

[purplebuddhaquotes]

“Everyone who terrifies you is sixty-five percent water. And everyone you love is made of stardust, and I know sometimes you cannot even breathe deeply, and the night sky is no home, and you have cried yourself to sleep enough times that you are down to your last two percent, but nothing is infinite, not even loss. You are made of the sea and the stars, and one day you are going to find yourself again.”

— Finn Butler

[hithereworldhowareyou]

hi there universe,

I would like some motivation for my January exams ....

oh and a nice boy please

Cheers!

[invitedbonfire]

[starlightjimin]

a collection of my favorite pink spreads uwu 🌸  insta: sadgirlstudying  🌸

[malnedott]

hmm

[defineyourgrind]

[shesellschemtrails-deactivated2]

[hithereworldhowareyou]

I feel like shit and somehow I’m not surprised

[hithereworldhowareyou]

For anyone out there reading...

Is feeling left out a self fulfilling prophecy?? I was scared I would feel left out this year and look at that, I am four days in and that is exactly how I feel. Is it probably just me???  helppppp

[incorrectshakespeare]

“I don’t have a nervous system. I am a nervous system.”

— Macbeth, probably