Keep your head up..

My mind, our secret. Ta

[wnq-writers]

Letting go isn’t a one-time thing. It’s a daily decision and the full effects take time. You’re going to be okay.

perpetuallyhopeful (via wnq-writers)

[theonlystefers]

[onlytwitterpics]

[hkpotatoes]

Look how beautiful she looks. Feel how bad your pain will be. Now that he has her..

[hkpotatoes]

today, i tried to kill myself.

[writingsforwinter]

The Morning After I Killed Myself

The morning after I killed myself, I woke up.

I made myself breakfast in bed. I added salt and pepper to my eggs and used my toast for a cheese and bacon sandwich. I squeezed a grapefruit into a juice glass. I scraped the ashes from the frying pan and rinsed the butter off the counter. I washed the dishes and folded the towels.

The morning after I killed myself, I fell in love. Not with the boy down the street or the middle school principal. Not with the everyday jogger or the grocer who always left the avocados out of the bag. I fell in love with my mother and the way she sat on the floor of my room holding each rock from my collection in her palms until they grew dark with sweat. I fell in love with my father down at the river as he placed my note into a bottle and sent it into the current. With my brother who once believed in unicorns but who now sat in his desk at school trying desperately to believe I still existed.

The morning after I killed myself, I walked the dog. I watched the way her tail twitched when a bird flew by or how her pace quickened at the sight of a cat. I saw the empty space in her eyes when she reached a stick and turned around to greet me so we could play catch but saw nothing but sky in my place. I stood by as strangers stroked her muzzle and she wilted beneath their touch like she did once for mine.

The morning after I killed myself, I went back to the neighbors’ yard where I left my footprints in concrete as a two year old and examined how they were already fading. I picked a few daylilies and pulled a few weeds and watched the elderly woman through her window as she read the paper with the news of my death. I saw her husband spit tobacco into the kitchen sink and bring her her daily medication.

The morning after I killed myself, I watched the sun come up. Each orange tree opened like a hand and the kid down the street pointed out a single red cloud to his mother.

The morning after I killed myself, I went back to that body in the morgue and tried to talk some sense into her. I told her about the avocados and the stepping stones, the river and her parents. I told her about the sunsets and the dog and the beach.

The morning after I killed myself, I tried to unkill myself, but couldn’t finish what I started.

[hkpotatoes]

Help..

[listenuppnow]

[laurenhooper]

Delete her number. Stop ringing her. Stop messaging her. Stop making excuses to see her, to drop by her place.Erase her name from memory. Remove yourself from her life, more completely than you would like but as completely as she deserves. Move on, so that you can allow her to also move on. When you close your eyes, you don’t get to see her face. Not anymore. You don’t get to think about her lips, the warm glow of her skin when she rests next to you, or how she squeezes your hand in her sleep. You are not allowed to remember the smell of her perfume, that she only drinks mint tea (with two dollops of honey), or that she loves you.She loves you.She has been in love with you for too long.So, forget how she says your name. Forget how she calls your name. Forget how she screams your name. Forget that time you got sick and she stayed up with you all night, letting you lay your head in her lap and holding a cold compress to your forehead. Forget how her hair feels in your fingers. Forget how she looks in your sweatshirts.Forget her.Know only that she existed at one point in your life, but relinquish all hope that she could exist at another point — sometime in the future that you are unwilling to specify because you don’t know what you want. Yet. It is not fair for you to swoop in and out of her life as you choose. It is not fair for you to say that you are satisfied with “things as they are” and you will have time to “figure it out” later. Let her stop investing emotionally in you. Let her pour that love and care into the people who deserve her.Don’t tell her that you think about her all the time. Don’t tell her that it bothers you to hear about her with other people, but that you’re willing to understand as long as she likes you more than them. Don’t tell her that this isn’t the right moment but that there will be a right moment. There is not going to be a right moment. She shouldn’t have to wait for the right moment.Don’t tell her that you can’t handle ultimatums, that you don’t like the idea of finally adding finality to your relationship — whatever still remains of it.What you are telling her is that you want to keep her on as an option, that you are taking her for granted, that you want to know she will be there, that you can depend on her at the end of the day. When you find that no one else has stuck around or that those who have are less interesting, less thoughtful, or less doggedly loyal to you.Doggedly loyal to you.That is what she has been to you, for you almost as long as you have known her: a constant emotional crutch, the guarantee of stability, a safety net while you reachvout to grasp objects that sparkle and shine far greater than she does. All that glitters is not gold, haven’t you heard?She is fire. You are ice, and you are afraid that her slow burn will smolder your cool, hard demeanor. That’s what has driven your decisions, your actions all along: fear. You are a coward. You are a hypocrite. You are terrified to let her go, but you are afraid she is too good for you, that she could drive you wild, that you would choke on her flames. That she is too much for you to handle right now.Right now.But if you choose not to love her now, you can’t choose to love her later.

Lauren Hooper (via fawun)

Kylie, I’m so sorry..

[hkpotatoes]

Bear with it.

I wish I wasn’t as privileged as I am. I wish I didn’t have so much invested in me. I wish all expectations of me would disappear. When someone’s dedicated their life towards bettering yours, breaking their back days on end for your sake. How do you take that life away from them..

Mum and dad, I became spoiled and unappreciative. I’m lucky enough to have not one, but two people living for my sake and yet all I can ever think about is how to say goodbye. I could just end the pain, but all I would be doing is passing it on.

Don’t be a heavier burden Huy.

[flashoflife]

If you cannot treat her like royalty, let someone else. That girl deserves the world. Losing her is a pain you will never shake. Your world will come crashing down on you and those pieces won’t ever fit the way they used to. Don’t let her go. She will love you with all she’s got. Please give her the same. I am begging you to not hurt her. She is golden. Don’t let that shine die out. Give her your all and she’ll return the favor. You will never have to ask the universe for anything ever again.

Sincerely, a name you’ll hear in passing. (via flashoflife)

[impressiing-deactivated20200615]

[angiellehcim]

when I came up for a breath… God, it was beautiful.

[astro-vee]

this is mesmerising.

[untamedunwanted]

If it makes you feel broken in any way, you need to end it before it ends you.

(via 12ja)

[filmcinematography]

“My biggest mistake other than hurting you was thinking you could fix me. Only I can fix me. I’d like to become the person who actually deserves to be with someone like you. I don’t know how long that’ll take, but I hope you’ll be there when it happens.“ 

Stuck in Love (2012)

[hkpotatoes]

This this this.

[hkpotatoes]

Get me out of here..

Someone, anyone... I’m in such a dark place right now.

[flinch-nerds]

[tyleroakley]

9 words to make you really think.

[stylefordays]

This. Is. Profound.

[artbymoga-deactivated20200516]

This is something everyone should see

[rory-clewlow-deactivated2013090]

[hkpotatoes]

Bold the ones you’ve done..

Kissed someone

Smoked a cigarette.

Gotten so drunk you passed out.

Rode every ride at an amusement park.

Gone to a rock concert.

Helped someone. 

Gone fishing. 

Watched four movies in one night.

Gone long periods of time without sleep. 

Snorted cocaine.

Failed a class.

Dealt drugs.

Been in a car accident.

Been in a tornado.

Done hard drugs (i.e. ecstasy, heroin, crack, meth, acid)

Watched someone die. 

Been to a funeral. 

Burned yourself.

Ran a marathon.

Cried yourself to sleep.

Spent 200$ in one day.

Flown on a plane. 

Cheated on someone.

Been cheated on.

Written a 10 page letter.

Gone skiing.

Been sailing.

Had a best friend.

Lost someone you loved.

Shoplifted something. 

Been to jail.

Dangerously close to being in jail.

Skipped school. 

Had detention. 

Got in trouble for something you didn’t do.

Gone to a different country.

Dropped out of school. 

Been in a mental hospital.

Watched all of the “Harry Potter” movies.

Had a yard sale.

Had a lemonade stand.

Actually made money at the lemonade stand. 

Voted for someone on a reality TV show.

Written poetry.

Read more than 20 books a year. 

Gone to Europe.

Loved someone you shouldn’t have.

Used a coloring book over age 12. 

Had surgery.

Had stitches.

Taken a taxi.

Seen the Washington Monument.

Had more than 5 IM’s/online conversations going at once.

Overdosed.

Had a drug or alcohol problem.

Been in a fist fight.

Suffered any form of abuse.

Gone surfing in California.

Had a pet hamster.

Pet a wild animal. 

Used a credit card.

Dyed your hair.

Got a tattoo.

Had something pierced.

Got straight A’s.

Been on the Honor Roll.

Known someone with HIV or AIDS.

Snuck out of the house.

Swore at a teacher.

Gone laser tagging.

French braided.

Skinny-dipped

Driven a car.

Had a blonde moment.

Been on a train.

Seen a ghost.

Gone bungee-jumping.

Been to Mexico.

Crashed a car.

Sky dived.

Been kissed in the rain. 

Made an 11:11 wish.

Drank alcohol.