Mark Thayer

I'm fancy! One time I had coffee flavored ice cream.

[vespermartiniarchive-deactivate]

[holidayysmark]

ooc | Mark & Gen

[holidayysgenevieve]

HAH! OH MY GOD. Please, PLEAAASEE have Mark be like: “omg you’re famous online too? How many instagram followers do you have? I’ve got like a hundred, it’s nbd.”

And Gen just stares at him for a second before being like: “……I have a hundred thousand followers. Like I said earlier: I’m VIP bitches. A ten is talking, stfu. #burn.”

Gen may or may not use Mark as part of her #TateChristmasReunion mission. xD Probably takes photos of him and Camilla with captions like: “absolute worst couple of all time #barfsville #TateChristmasReunion #thankgodforCharChar”

Also probably one of the other ones she hides from all the time behind Charlie like: “OMG, plz. He’s gonna come try and talk hashtags at me! it’s only cool when I do it! HIDE ME, CHAR-CHAR. PULL ME INTO THE OTHER ROOM WE’LL PRETEND LIKE WE’RE MAKING OUT. MAYBE THEN HE’LL LEAVE ME ALONE.”

Also also i feel like Gen could be one of the people he potentially makes stuff super awkward for. Especially if he does follow Gen closely on her social media, bc he could easily point out that there has been basically NO MENTION of Charlie at all on anything of hers until this weekend. Which is weird with how Gen documents pree much EVERYTHING.

HE COULD TOTALLY ALMOST POKE HOLES IN GEN’S PLAN TO BE #AMAZEBALLS THIS CHRISTMAS.

[holidayysmark]

LAKJFLJASDLFJA OMG ACTUAL DIALOGUE THO. 

He will just stare at her and be like, ".... okay, yeah that's significantly more." And then pause and be like, "I've only been on there for about a year or so .... so I'll catch up" and #fail

But OMG he will def be there to boast the #tatechristmasreunion tag hahahaha. Also, he'll def think that he will think that her hashtags about him are sarcastic and like made out of jealousy b/c obvi they are the best couple OF ALL TIME. (It is known.) 

!!!!! YES HE WILL TOTALLY NOTICE. And as i told Tina, I feel like he will not put it together and will basically be pulling a Cory Adams and think it's b/c he's a secret agent and can't have an online presence or b/c he's a vampire and can't be photographed or something dumb like that. B/C OBVIOUSLY THEY AREN'T A FAKE COUPLE. 

But I can see him like loudly declaring that Charlie has no presence on any of Gen's social media and like all the normal ppl who don't pay that much attention will probs start to wonder what's up with that (I don't think they will be buying any of Mark's theories, haha) 

[holidayysmark]

ooc | Mark & Charlie

[holidayyscharlie]

Oh my goodness. I feel like Gen totally warned Charlie about Mark and that Charlie is kind of prepared for this but at the same time he’s totally not prepared for this. (I think Charlie seriously thought Gen was joking about some of the things.) Sooo I think Charlie might humor Mark but then later off with Gen be like “your cousin is insane. literally. I didn’t think you were serious.”

Though, at the same time, I think Charlie would actually like being welcomed by Mark?? Because he is suuuuuper out of place here and even though it’s the cousin no one really likes, it’s still someone accepting him without a whole lot of questions. … But he’s still going to think Mark’s nuts, haha.

[holidayysmark]

YOU CAN NEVER BE PREPARED FOR MARK LBR. ;DDD 

Hhah, omg!! He probs thought Gen was exaggerating about him and then he's like ".... nope." ;DDD

I actually really like that idea! :D B/c Mark def wouldn't be asking him 29387439847 questions like Drew will (at least at first, but more on that later) and he will generally take it upon himself to be Mark's ~guide to the family (Although I feel like he gets distracted by Camilla alot and he kinda fails haha) 

ANYWAY, I was talking to Lauren and Mark thinks he's super cool and on the same plane with Gen when it comes to social media presence and he def follows Gen on everything, and I think he will start to be like "wAIIIITTT? why isn't Charlie on like anything?!??!" (especially since his insta is literally all pics of Cammie) And he will def think something's up but will NOT think it's that it's fake, he will just be like "wait is charlie a secret agent and he's not allowed to have his pic online??" or "is he a vampire? i heard vampries can't have their pictures taken?" and so he will probs eventually ask him questions, but they will be legit ridiculous like that. 

[holidayyslucy]

ooc || Mark & Lucy

So, how do we think these two might get along? I feel like they honestly might almost be the same amount of crazy. Though Lucy will probs say that Mark is certifiable and should probably think about seeing someone and maybe toning it down a bit and maybe not following his wife around *quite* so much. Because that’s just unhealthy, man. Not that Lucy isn’t almost EXACTLY THE SAME WAY *shakes head*

[holidayysmark]

HAHA omg. I feel like Mark will be like "Okay, wow. I am not crazy, okay? I mean, have you seen Camilla?? I'd be crazy not to follow her around all the time. SO .... joke's on you." 

but he def will not be offended by her calling him crazy (NOT LIKE HARVEY OMG) like he won't agree with her, but it'll def just like roll off him. bUT HE isn't always that observant (~def distracted by his wife haha) so I'm not sure he will even notice that Lucy isn't always the same way hahah

but regardless of her ~accusations, I can weirdly see them getting along?? 

[holidayysserena]

ooc || Mark & Serena

Okay sooo. Serena and Mark. I think Serena is going to especially loathe Mark this year because Drew and Serena used to basically be Mark and Camilla (though wow, probably not to the same extent. I feel like Drew and Serena used to have all kinds of inside jokes making fun of Mark and Camilla?? Because who wouldn’t. And Serena, um, used to actually be fun. Oops.) So now that everything’s messy I Serena will probably see Mark as public enemy #1 O.O

[holidayysmark]

hahah OMG. I think that Mark will probs also see Serena as public enemy #1 b/c she's showing up and ruining everyone's christmas (no, he doesn't notice that his wife had that under control all by herself haha) -- which is totally marks' favorite holiday -- but also the fact that she cheated on Drew, like NO. You do not mess with Mark's family like that, man. 

Anyway, i feel like Mark will try to get rid of Serena and constantly be trying to ~escort her off the presmises. (I feel like he fails tho haha, especially b/c I'm sure Camilla actually likes Serena around b/c if she isn't a recipe for stirring things up, I don't know what is, haha) 

[holidayysmark]

ooc | Mark & Camilla

[holidayyscamilla]

NO BUT REALLY and I feel like she’s legit like “I hate everything but I never really seem to hate you” also she looooves making ppl feel awkward so I feel like she enjoys doing things like sitting on his lap and making out w him in public #facepalm Esp if an uptight cousin or something is present (or her own parents tbqh).

They’ve been together for ten years, now, right? (Did I read that somewhere?) I had soooo much more to say but I CANT remember sighhh oh well HAHAHAHA

[holidayysmark]

I feel like Mark def enjoys it when she sits on his laps and makes out with him in public. ;D I can see him being like, "Waiiiiitttttt .... are you doing this just to make other people jealous and uncomfortable? That's horrible ... but also incredibly hot." ~continues make out session~ i can also see him not even catching on, haha. 

But also, I don't think Mark realizes just how horrible Camilia can be either?? Like, she's always really nice to him so yeah. I think he thinks of her as kinda a prankster type, not like someone who has taken Chaos 101 by Professor Destriksyon. ;DD

Anyway, I'm not sure how long they've been together, but ten years sounds good to me, haha (do you think they've been married all that time? Or is that since they first started dating??) 

[holidayyseliza-blog]

OOC;; Mark and Eliza

Hello! It’s Genevieve here with Eliza. I think Mark is absolutely adorable. Eliza would love to have a plot with him but he will more than likely not be too fond of her because of her ruining his cousin Wendy’s life and such. But I personally would just like to look at him all day. haha!

[holidayysmark]

Haha yeahhhh, that'd def throw a wrench in their relationship, I think. But since she just kinda shows up at first and no one knows that she's Jimmy's mistress (unless she says something??), I can actually seeing them getting on pretty well up until the point when Mark finds out. All that being said, he's def gonna be wayyy more upset with Jimmy than Eliza, haha. 

[holidayysmark]

ooc | Mark & Camilla

( actual dialogue tho )

[folieadeus]

“Jake. I don’t want to see Teddy right now. I’m about to break up with him.”

[holidayysmark]

ooc | Mark & Charlie

I feel like Mark will try to become Charlie's BFF and will def welcome him to the family and point to Camilla and be like "see what we have? that's what you get to look forward to" *cheesy smile* (Meanwhile, Camilla is probs in a heated argument with someone's grandmother) 

[holidayysmark]

ooc | Mark & Gen

I feel like Mark lives under the misconception that he and Gen are the cool cousins. And like def tries to match Gen in her internet presence but he fails and I don't think he even understands how how of the social media websites work tbh. 

Also, he doesn't understand texting and legit sends messages like this with random emojis:

[homefortheholidayys]

Mark Thayer - 34 - Andy Samberg - taken by Lizzy (relationships): Camilla (wife), Laraine (aunt), Andrew, Wendy, Genevieve, Judd, Serena & Jimmy (cousins)

Mark has spent every Christmas he can remember with the Tates

his mother always used the holidays as an excuse to go to Europe for a month

a month without him, spent in the arms of every guy she could find

so she’d pack off her only son to spend the holidays with his cousins

which Mark didn’t mind so much

he actually got along really well with all of them

but since he married Camilla just over ten blissful years ago

holidays have never been the same

Mark can’t understand why his cousins never seem all that excited to see him

he knows Camilla can’t be the problem

she’s entirely too perfect for them not to love her

she’s so perfect he can’t stop staring at her

or taking pictures of her

because they have to remember this moment forever

what if they forget a perfect moment?!?!

THAT WOULD BE ABSOLUTELY TRAGIC

so what if he’s super happy with the Camilla

the Tate kids are kind of a mess compared to them

but that’s a whole other can of worms Mark won’t hesitate to talk about when he’s not doting on Camilla