EXPECTATIONS
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Janaina Medeiros
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āWe can spend our lives letting the world tell us who we are. Sane or insane. Saints or sex addicts. Heroes or victims. Letting history tell us how good or bad we are. Letting our past decide our future. Or we can decide for ourselves. And maybe itās our job to invent something better.ā - Chuck Palahniuk, Choke
Signs of a Workplace Bully
Gary Namie, PhD, director of the Workplace Bullying Institute, says these are the 25 most common tactics adopted by bullies, according to targeted victims. (Iām bolding the ones that are happening right now)
Falsely accusing someone of āerrorsā not actually made.
Staring, glaring, being nonverbally intimidating and clearly showing hostility.
Discounting the personās thoughts or feelings (āoh, thatās sillyā) in meetings.
Using the āsilent treatmentā to āice outā and separate from others.
Exhibiting presumably uncontrollable mood swings in front of the group.
Making up own rules on the fly that even she/he does not follow.
Disregarding satisfactory or exemplary quality of completed work despite evidence.
Harshly and constantly criticizing having a different āstandardā for the target.
Starting, or failing to stop, destructive rumors or gossip about the person.
Encouraging people to turn against the person being tormented.
Singling out and isolating one person from co-workers, either socially or physically.
Publicly displaying āgross,ā undignified, but not illegal, behavior.
Yelling, screaming, and throwing tantrums in front of others to humiliate a person.
Stealing credit for work done by others.
Abusing the evaluation process by lying about the personās performance.
Rebelling for failing to follow arbitrary commands.
Using confidential information about a person to humiliate privately or publicly.
Retaliating against the person after a complaint was filed.
Making verbal put-downs/insults based on gender, race, accent or language, disability.
Assigning undesirable work as punishment.
Making undoable demandsā workload, deadlines, duties ā for person singled out.
Launching a baseless campaign to oust the person.
Encouraging the person to quit or transfer rather than to face more mistreatment.
Sabotaging the personās contribution to a team goal and reward.
Ensuring failure of personās project by not performing required tasks: signoffs, taking calls, working with collaborators.
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Your relationship should be your place of peace. It should be the place where all armor comes off, egos are humbled, and transparency reigns supreme.
āIf I lived a million lives, I wouldāve felt a million feelings and I still wouldāve fallen a million times for you.ā
ā R.M. Drake