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@hopednot-m
soĀ myĀ newĀ blogĀ isĀ upĀ !!Ā iāllĀ beĀ continuingĀ threadsĀ andĀ asksĀ inĀ myĀ draftsĀ hereĀ ,Ā butĀ ifĀ youĀ wouldĀ likeĀ toĀ keepĀ writingĀ wĀ meĀ thenĀ giveĀ thisĀ aĀ likeĀ andĀ iāllĀ followĀ youĀ onĀ myĀ newĀ blogĀ !!
STAR CITY CHILDREN:Ā wingless but drunk onĀ rose gold champagne,Ā bottles emptied into bridge-side harbors and thrown against the setting sun.Ā we were godās childrenĀ until we were cast out of heaven, our ankles bitten by the earthās crust, grounded.
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā we are asphalt kissed.
/
love women who dont subscribe to modesty like at allā¦ when someone tells them theyāre good at something and they like āyeah i amā āi knowā thatās so hot
yesjulictā.
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā āĀ oi, mitchell .Ā āĀ chin propped on hand, gaz delivers a swift but soft kick to mitchellās shin from under the table along with his whisper. nevermind that theyāre in the middle of class right now. all gaz can think about is how badly heād rather be anywhere else.Ā Ā āĀ meet es outside after ??Ā ā
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā šššššš Ā ššššššššĀ .Ā heāsĀ notĀ payingĀ attentionĀ toĀ hisĀ surroundingsĀ ,Ā busyĀ doodlingĀ alongĀ theĀ marginĀ ofĀ hisĀ notebookĀ .Ā onlyĀ snappingĀ outĀ ofĀ itĀ asĀ heĀ feelsĀ aĀ kickĀ againstĀ hisĀ shinĀ ,Ā doeĀ eyesĀ stareĀ acrossĀ theĀ tableĀ atĀ hisĀ Ā šššššĀ bestĀ friendĀ asĀ heĀ nodsĀ quicklyĀ ,Ā Ā āĀ aightĀ .Ā āĀ heĀ agreesĀ ,Ā teethĀ bitingĀ downĀ hardĀ onĀ theĀ insideĀ ofĀ hisĀ mouthĀ toĀ force downĀ hisĀ smileĀ ,Ā headĀ dippingĀ downĀ againĀ toĀ stareĀ atĀ hisĀ doodleĀ filledĀ pageĀ ,Ā Ā āĀ needĀ aĀ smokeĀ anywayĀ .Ā ā
yesjulictā.
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā āĀ is it cause i wasnāt thereĀ ??Ā āĀ heās completely oblivious. an idiot.Ā āĀ by the way, mom and dad absolutely lost their shit when heejin came home from her boyfriendās house this morning so if iām never allowed to leave the house after today, blame my sisterĀ .Ā ā
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā āĀ Ā šššš Ā , Ā ššššššššĀ ..Ā āĀ sheĀ canātĀ helpĀ butĀ squeezeĀ hisĀ handĀ gentlyĀ ,Ā searchingĀ forĀ comfortĀ .Ā Ā āĀ probablyĀ wouldāveĀ sleptĀ betterĀ ifĀ youĀ wereĀ thereĀ toĀ beĀ honestĀ ...Ā āĀ theĀ sinkingĀ feelingĀ inĀ theĀ pitĀ ofĀ herĀ stomachĀ returnsĀ ,Ā aĀ frownĀ formingĀ onĀ herĀ lipsĀ ,Ā Ā āĀ blameĀ heejinĀ ...Ā iāllĀ keepĀ thatĀ inĀ mindĀ ,Ā āĀ forcedĀ laughĀ ,Ā aĀ beatĀ ofĀ silenceĀ ,Ā Ā āĀ heyĀ ...Ā youĀ knowĀ iĀ loveĀ youĀ ...Ā rightĀ ??Ā ā
yesjulictā.
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā she laughed. she laughed. saul counts that as a win, even if it happens to be a small one.Ā āĀ just a personal one, miss mementĀ Ā .Ā āĀ what a name. it tastes like honey, and when she says it, it sounds like birds. or chimes. or weddingĀ bells.Ā the next step is to ask her to coffee. itās six simple words. six small, easy words. when he looks at her, though, all he can manage isĀ ā no miss, thatās it. just make sure to stop by on your way outĀ .Ā ā
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā ššš Ā šššš Ā ššššššš Ā ššš Ā šššš ššššš Ā , Ā ššššššššš Ā ššš Ā ššššš Ā šš Ā ššš Ā ššššĀ .Ā butĀ sheāsĀ notĀ overlyĀ uncomfortableĀ anymoreĀ .Ā shoulderāsĀ relaxĀ asĀ sheĀ pushesĀ darkĀ hairĀ behindĀ herĀ earĀ .Ā hisĀ repetitionĀ ofĀ herĀ nameĀ ,Ā andĀ theĀ silenceĀ followingĀ causesĀ herĀ toĀ assumeĀ theĀ conversationĀ isĀ overĀ ,Ā feetĀ movingĀ toĀ takeĀ herĀ toĀ herĀ officeĀ āĀ butĀ hisĀ voiceĀ hitsĀ herĀ earsĀ againĀ .Ā andĀ sheĀ Ā šššššššĀ nodsĀ inĀ responseĀ ,Ā Ā āĀ iĀ willĀ ..Ā ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā ššš Ā ššš Ā ššššĀ .Ā shylyĀ approachingĀ theĀ desk atĀ theĀ endĀ ofĀ theĀ dayĀ ,Ā Ā āĀ soĀ ,Ā longĀ dayĀ ??Ā āĀ aĀ smileĀ ,Ā madeleineāsĀ armsĀ comingĀ upĀ toĀ restĀ onĀ theĀ deskĀ ,Ā carĀ keysĀ rattlingĀ offĀ theĀ marbleĀ ,Ā Ā āĀ isĀ itĀ ,Ā atĀ leastĀ ,Ā almostĀ overĀ ??Ā ā
dianasilverss: character work
sir, this is my emotional support lipgloss
CITY BOY.
Everyone who has/have had a multi muse probably: okay so I'm only gonna have like 2 or 3 muses
One week and 20 muses later: what happened
One month and 60 muses later: I've lost control
Six months later: i have no self-control left
One year later: ....
103198ā.
Ā Ā Ā Ā JO TAESONGĀ isĀ aĀ veryĀ busyĀ manĀ .Ā runningĀ aĀ Ā cultĀ religiousĀ organizationĀ isĀ notĀ an easyĀ taskĀ .Ā theĀ spiritualĀ needsĀ ofĀ hisĀ congregantsĀ needĀ toĀ beĀ metĀ byĀ himĀ andĀ himĀ aloneĀ ,Ā andĀ convincingĀ peopleĀ toĀ stayĀ whileĀ simultaneouslyĀ convincingĀ themĀ thatĀ h e l lĀ isĀ inevitableĀ areĀ difficultĀ tasksĀ toĀ balanceĀ .Ā notĀ toĀ mentionĀ thatĀ T R OU B L E M A K E RĀ Ā boyĀ ,Ā joshuaĀ ,Ā thatĀ thinksĀ heĀ hasĀ anyĀ freedomĀ hereĀ .Ā thankfullyĀ ,Ā oneĀ ofĀ theĀ fewĀ spiritualĀ practicesĀ taesongĀ hasĀ carriedĀ overĀ fromĀ hisĀ timeĀ asĀ aĀ baptistĀ isĀ journalingĀ .Ā Ā beingĀ ableĀ toĀ writeĀ downĀ hisĀ thoughtsĀ ,Ā Ā theĀ grandĀ machinationsĀ ofĀ hisĀ mindĀ ,Ā calmsĀ theĀ Ā stormĀ .Ā
Ā Ā Ā Ā HEĀ DOESNāTĀ NOTICEĀ Ā ,Ā atĀ firstĀ ,Ā whenĀ theĀ doorĀ toĀ hisĀ officeĀ opensĀ ,Ā tooĀ Ā absorbedĀ inĀ hisĀ ownĀ writingĀ toĀ lookĀ upĀ .Ā itāsĀ onlyĀ whenĀ taesongĀ sensesĀ aĀ presenceĀ atĀ hisĀ sideĀ thatĀ heĀ bothersĀ toĀ liftĀ hisĀ eyesĀ fromĀ theĀ paperĀ .Ā asĀ soonĀ asĀ heĀ doesĀ ,Ā aĀ Ā softĀ smileĀ spreadsĀ acrossĀ hisĀ faceĀ (Ā uncharacteristic for a man capable of such sadism as himĀ )Ā andĀ heĀ offersĀ aĀ handĀ toĀ theĀ girlĀ standingĀ nextĀ toĀ himĀ .Ā hisĀ preciousĀ daughterĀ .Ā hisĀ a m e t h y s tĀ .
Ā Ā Ā Ā āĀ hello, my little jewel. where have you been all dayĀ ??Ā ā
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā ššš Ā šššš Ā šš Ā š Ā šššš Ā ššššš Ā ššššĀ .Ā sheĀ wasnātĀ alwaysĀ .Ā noĀ ,Ā sheĀ usedĀ toĀ beĀ happyĀ ,Ā excitableĀ ,Ā withĀ aĀ smileĀ toĀ spareĀ forĀ everyoneĀ andĀ anyoneĀ .Ā thoughĀ itāsĀ hardĀ toĀ rememberĀ whoĀ youĀ Ā ššššĀ whenĀ youĀ donātĀ knowĀ whoĀ youĀ Ā šššĀ .Ā butĀ sheĀ wasĀ oftenĀ betterĀ whenĀ withĀ theĀ otherĀ teenagersĀ inĀ theĀ compoundĀ ,Ā withĀ joshuaĀ andĀ silasĀ ,Ā herĀ Ā ššš Ā ššššššššĀ ,Ā herĀ Ā šššš Ā š ššššššĀ .Ā andĀ thatāsĀ exactlyĀ whereĀ sheĀ hadĀ beenĀ ...Ā beforeĀ panicĀ setĀ inĀ ,Ā aĀ resultĀ ofĀ beingĀ apartĀ fromĀ herĀ Ā š šššššĀ forĀ tooĀ longĀ .Ā andĀ itĀ wasnātĀ longĀ beforeĀ thatĀ panicĀ turnedĀ toĀ tearsĀ ,Ā andĀ thoseĀ tearsĀ turnedĀ toĀ amyĀ fallingĀ asleepĀ onĀ joshuaāsĀ lapĀ .Ā aĀ wayĀ ofĀ keepingĀ herĀ awayĀ fromĀ theĀ cultāsĀ leaderĀ ,Ā noĀ doubtĀ .Ā unfortunatelyĀ ,Ā theĀ tacticĀ onlyĀ workedĀ untilĀ theĀ youngestĀ wokeĀ upĀ . Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā ššš Ā ššššš'š Ā šššš Ā ššš Ā šššššššš Ā šššššĀ .Ā sheĀ neverĀ doesĀ .Ā herĀ footstepsĀ areĀ lightĀ asĀ aĀ featherĀ asĀ sheĀ approachesĀ theĀ doorĀ ,Ā mouthĀ closingĀ beforeĀ sheĀ canĀ evenĀ thinkĀ aboutĀ sayingĀ helloĀ .Ā Ā ššš Ā šš Ā ššššĀ ,Ā notesĀ the quietĀ voiceĀ inĀ theĀ backĀ ofĀ herĀ headĀ ,Ā Ā ššššš Ā šššš Ā šš Ā ššššššš'š Ā šššššš Ā ššš Ā šššš Ā šš'š Ā ššššĀ .Ā butĀ sheāsĀ notĀ botheringĀ himĀ .Ā isĀ sheĀ ??Ā eyesĀ driftĀ asĀ headĀ turnsĀ toĀ glanceĀ overĀ herĀ shoulderĀ .Ā aĀ momentĀ ofĀ doubtĀ beforeĀ sheĀ decidesĀ ,Ā ššĀ ,Ā Ā šš Ā šššš'š Ā ššššššššš Ā ššš Ā , Ā ššš Ā šš Ā šššššš Ā ššššš Ā šš Ā ššš Ā šššĀ .Ā herĀ footstepsĀ towardsĀ himĀ areĀ quickĀ ,Ā andĀ theĀ girlĀ decidesĀ thatĀ itĀ doesnātĀ matterĀ ifĀ davidĀ willĀ beĀ upsetĀ withĀ herĀ laterĀ ,Ā becauseĀ taesongĀ willĀ protectĀ herĀ .Ā Ā ššš Ā ššš Ā šššššš Ā šššššššš Ā šššĀ . Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā ššš Ā ššššš Ā ššš Ā šššš Ā šš Ā ššššš Ā ššššš Ā ššššš Ā šš Ā šššĀ šššššš Ā šššĀ .Ā andĀ amyĀ choiĀ smilesĀ forĀ theĀ firstĀ timeĀ sinceĀ sheĀ Ā ššššĀ broughtĀ herĀ backĀ ,Ā Ā āĀ amet āĀ ...Ā amyĀ wasĀ withĀ joshuaĀ andĀ silasĀ ...Ā butĀ sheĀ missedĀ herĀ dadĀ ...Ā āĀ eyesĀ dropĀ toĀ theĀ journalĀ onĀ theĀ deskĀ ,Ā eyebrowsĀ creasingĀ asĀ sheĀ triesĀ toĀ takeĀ inĀ theĀ wordsĀ ,Ā Ā āĀ whatĀ areĀ youĀ doingĀ ??Ā ā
yesjulict.
Ā Ā Ā his heart drops. she doesnāt recognize him. feeling incredibly awkward at having to do it this way, dylan extends a hand and tries to offer a smile no matter how badly he wants to just throw his arms around her and cry.Ā Ā āĀ alex, itās dylanā¦ iām your brotherĀ .Ā ā
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā ā ššššš ... Ā ā the Ā name Ā is Ā so Ā painfully Ā familiar . Ā brings Ā such Ā a Ā feeling Ā of Ā warmth Ā to Ā a Ā girl Ā who Ā hasnāt Ā known Ā safety Ā in Ā almost Ā a Ā decade . Ā she Ā blinks Ā as Ā she Ā watches Ā him Ā outstrech Ā his Ā hand . Ā her Ā own Ā slowly Ā clamping Ā down Ā in Ā a Ā handshake Ā . Ā tears Ā filing Ā her Ā eyes . voice Ā drops Ā to Ā a Ā whisper Ā . Ā šššš Ā ššš'š Ā šššššššš Ā ššš , Ā ā i Ā thought Ā you Ā were Ā dead Ā ... Ā ā
yesjulictā.
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā itās a girl. itās just a girl. aleksy lowers the blade slowly but doesnāt put it away. she could still be a thief.Ā Ā āĀ did you take anythingĀ ??Ā āĀ they had food in the kitchen. good, fresh vegetables from the basement garden box. if she took any of itā¦ if she ate any of itā¦ it could be the difference between life and death for aleksy and feliks.
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā šššš Ā š šššššš Ā šššššššš Ā šš Ā ššš Ā ššššš Ā šš Ā ššš Ā šššššĀ .Ā tearsĀ wellĀ inĀ magdalenaāsĀ eyesĀ ,Ā streamingĀ downĀ herĀ cheeksĀ oneĀ byĀ oneĀ .Ā sheĀ movesĀ slowlyĀ onceĀ againĀ ,Ā reachingĀ intoĀ herĀ smallĀ backpackĀ andĀ removingĀ aĀ tomatoĀ andĀ twoĀ carrotsĀ ,Ā Ā āĀ i - iĀ didnātĀ knowĀ ...Ā āĀ sheĀ repeatsĀ ,Ā holdingĀ theĀ foodĀ outĀ towardsĀ himĀ ,Ā Ā āĀ iĀ wouldĀ neverĀ ,Ā neverĀ stealĀ ,Ā pleaseĀ ...Ā takeĀ it - takeĀ allĀ ofĀ itĀ !!Ā āĀ backpackĀ isĀ quicklyĀ removedĀ fromĀ herĀ shouldersĀ andĀ tossedĀ gentlyĀ inĀ hisĀ directionĀ ,Ā landingĀ atĀ hisĀ feetĀ ,Ā Ā āĀ itāsĀ forĀ youĀ ...Ā anĀ apologyĀ ...Ā pleaseĀ donātĀ hurtĀ meĀ ...Ā ā
yesjulictā.
Ā Ā Ā Ā sora is excited for her, if not a little jealous. after all, jaehwan isĀ one of the hottest older guys in their immediate circle thatās not old enough for sora to pursue herself. besidesĀ the fact that itāll definitely royally piss off kang yujin if she finds out that yeseul is dating jaehwan.Ā Ā āĀ girl thatās so excitingĀ Ā !!Ā jaehwan is like, mega hot andĀ his dad is one of those like big-wig soccer players. go get ice cream and secure your bag, sis !!Ā ā
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā šššš'š Ā šššššššššš Ā ššššš Ā šššš Ā šššš Ā šš Ā šššššš Ā .Ā Ā but Ā itās Ā hard Ā to Ā not Ā cling Ā to Ā positive Ā affirmation Ā when Ā you Ā receive Ā none Ā at Ā home Ā . eyes Ā are Ā bright Ā , yeseul Ā hasnāt Ā smiled Ā so Ā much Ā that Ā her Ā cheeks Ā ache Ā in Ā well Ā over Ā a Ā year Ā , Ā ā Ā he Ā is Ā honestly Ā one Ā of Ā the Ā most Ā beautiful Ā men Ā i Ā have Ā ever Ā laid Ā my Ā eyes Ā on Ā , Ā šš Ā ššš . Ā ā a Ā hand Ā reaches Ā out , Ā grasping Ā onto Ā her Ā best Ā friendās Ā , itās Ā a Ā comfort Ā action Ā for Ā the Ā brunette Ā , Ā ā Ā and Ā heās Ā so Ā kind Ā , and Ā funny , Ā honestly , Ā the Ā only Ā man Ā šššš . Ā ā
yesjulictā.
Ā Ā Ā Ā itād be remiss to say that julius isnāt nervous. he hasnāt seen myungdae since the sentencing hearing, and that wasnāt exactly a good day for either of them. the security measures outside the visitation room are making him nervous, even though julius knows that heās doing nothing wrong. thereās nothing to smuggle in. he has no weapons. he just wants to see his boyfriend.Ā
Ā Ā Ā Ā when heās finally let into the room and he lays eyes on myungdae, sitting alone at one of the tables near the center of the room, any sense of anxiety is replaced with nervous butterflies. julius brushes his hair behind his ear and waves. itās blonde now. he hopes myungdae likes it.Ā
Ā Ā Ā Ā āĀ hi babyĀ .Ā āĀ julius smiles as he slides into the seat across the table.Ā Ā āĀ i missed youĀ .Ā ā
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā šš Ā ššššš Ā ššš Ā ššš Ā ššššššš Ā šš Ā ššš ššš Ā šš Ā šššš Ā šššššš Ā ššš Ā ššššĀ .Ā thereāsĀ onlyĀ threeĀ peopleĀ patheticĀ enoughĀ toĀ visitĀ himĀ ,Ā andĀ onlyĀ oneĀ thatĀ couldĀ visitĀ himĀ withoutĀ arisingĀ suspicionĀ .Ā Ā ššššššĀ .Ā theĀ lovestruckĀ idiotĀ .Ā myungdaeāsĀ mindĀ isnātĀ filledĀ withĀ positiveĀ thoughtsĀ asĀ heāsĀ restrainedĀ withĀ handcuffsĀ ,Ā roughlyĀ shovedĀ throughĀ dullĀ corridorsĀ .Ā noĀ .Ā inĀ factĀ ,Ā heāsĀ alreadyĀ annoyedĀ withĀ theĀ visitĀ . Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā ššššš Ā šššš Ā šššš Ā ššš Ā šššš Ā šš'š Ā ššššššš Ā ššĀ .Ā a sighĀ fallingĀ pastĀ hisĀ lipsĀ asĀ heāsĀ practicallyĀ thrownĀ intoĀ oneĀ ofĀ theĀ disgustingĀ ,Ā dentedĀ metalĀ chairsĀ inĀ theĀ centreĀ ofĀ itĀ allĀ .Ā inspectingĀ theĀ chippedĀ ,Ā uglyĀ ,Ā yellowĀ paintĀ jobĀ onĀ theĀ wallsĀ ,Ā theĀ greyĀ ofĀ theĀ skyĀ outsideĀ ,Ā indentsĀ onĀ theĀ floorĀ ofĀ scrapedĀ chairsĀ .Ā hisĀ cellĀ looksĀ moreĀ welcomingĀ thanĀ thisĀ shitholeĀ . Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā ššš Ā šššš Ā šš Ā ššššš Ā šš Ā šššššš Ā ššššššĀ .Ā theĀ youngerĀ barelyĀ holdingĀ backĀ anĀ eyeĀ rollĀ asĀ theĀ otherĀ smilesĀ andĀ sitsĀ oppositeĀ .Ā hisĀ voiceĀ isĀ monotonousĀ ,Ā Ā ššš Ā šššš'š Ā šššĀ ??Ā Ā āĀ helloĀ ,Ā juliusĀ .Ā āĀ atĀ leastĀ this timeĀ heĀ canĀ attemptĀ toĀ forceĀ aĀ smileĀ ,Ā Ā āĀ stillĀ unableĀ toĀ functionĀ withoutĀ meĀ ,Ā hmĀ ??Ā ā
