down with the motherfucking clown

26 | they/he | Witch of Rage | Derse unable to stop thinking about the post scratch timeline

[clawsomebeats]

its time

[clawsomebeats]

well fuck

[billcarden]

Lil diva head come off

[paperstreetlocal]

[girlnephew]

[astronomifier]

In House of Leaves, Navidson spends huge chunks of the book stuck in his home, while in Homestuck, John leaves the house almost immediately. Really makes you think.

[lakevida]

take that dirk strider tag off yhat post about my life or so help me god

[lakevida]

unpin me i can feel it

[jewfrogs]

theyre adding a new piece to the chess board its called the prince and basically he fags it up out there

[sparvverius]

listen--i'm not happy about our choices for president either. i hate all of these people and wish that they would just drop dead. but we have so much at stake in this election. we have to prevent us losing our rights, as well as the formation of a doomed timeline. for these reasons we have get together as a united front and GET OUT THERE AND VOTE for the insane clown posse!!!!!

[hotgirlsforicp]

Here’s how ICP can still win.

[lakemojave]

Nice argument bro. Unfortunately for you, the meteor is coming

[genderyomi-deactivated20240903]

[END OF ACT I]

==>

[danziluu-deactivated20240904]

Jane doodle

[ineffable-gallimaufry]

if they made a homestuck movie:

VOICEOVER: it's coming...

*two drum beats*

JOHN EGBERT: *puts the disk for sburb into his computer* i'm in

VOICEOVER: this summer

*two drum beats*

ROSE LALONDE: *rolls eyes* john, stop goofing around

VOICEOVER: prepare to be stuck...

*two drum beats*

JADE HARLEY: *wakes up and looks around*

VOICEOVER: at home

*two drum beats*

DAVE STRIDER: *spins record* woah, this is off the wall, yo

*shitty orchestral cover of sburban jungle plays*

ROXY: but you don't understand! this game is dangerous!

*cut to dave leaving his clone behind at his quest bed*

DAVE: i can't do it... i just can't kill another me...

*bec noir appears next to alt dave*

ALT DAVE: he's right behind me isn't he

*fades to black as bec noir slashes a sword at alt dave's neck*

*text on screen reads "ASCEND"*

*cut to rose in her shed*

JOHN: rose, the meteor's gonna hit!!

ROSE: *grabs computer* *rolls eyes*

*text on screen reads "DESCEND"*

*cut to scenes of the war on the chess field*

*text on screen reads "RISE UP"*

*cut to john, running out of his kitchen*

JOHN: these imps are everywhere!!

*text on screen reads "ABSCOND"*

ROSE: it's all over...

*cut to the various sprites being sprited*

*cut to jake kissing dirk's head*

DIRK STRIDER: *standing nearby* *coughs* awkward...

*cut to terezi and john after game over*

TEREZI: john, 1t's 4ll up to you now...

JOHN: *gasps*

*cut to john and dave hugging*

NEPETA: *grins* :33< i ship ittttt

KARKAT: *facepalm*

*cut to terezi and vriska facing off*

TEREZI: vr1ska, you c4n't do th1s!

VRISKA: watch me!

*montage of vriska doing a bunch of random and cool stuff*

VRISKA: i can do anything!!!!!!!!

*cut to grimdark rose and dave*

ROSE: to win... we're gonna have to blow up the sun

DAVE: awww snap

*text on screen reads "NIC CAGE"*

JOHN: and i mean, of COURSE con air is the best movie ever!! what other movie would you even suggest

*text on screen reads "LIL NAS X"*

DAVE: man, this isn't even the best song in obama's whole rap career

*text on screen reads "AMANDLA STENBERG"*

ROSE: *rolls eyes* whatever, mom! i'm summoning cuthulu!

*text on screen reads "ZENDAYA"*

JADE: *petting bec* oh, who's the best dog! is it you?

*a bunch more celebrity names on screen*

*text on screen reads "BASED ON THE WEBCOMIC BY ANDREW HUSSIE"*

ANDREW HUSSIE: *sitting in chair* wait, am i still in this movie? do i still die?

VOICEOVER: yes

HUSSIE: oh poop

*text on screen reads "HOMESTUCK: THE MOVIE"*

JOHN: we're gonna save the world... or die trying

*quick montage of every single death scene*

DAVE: i think we're gonna die trying

JOHN: daaaaveeee

*text on screen reads "COMING THIS SUMMER"*

*cut to dave beatboxing*

KARKAT: CAN YOU SHUT UP?!

DAVE: are you gonna make me?

NEPETA: :33< ooooh—

DAVE and KARKAT in unison: DON'T SAY IT

NEPETA: :33< ship it

*they both sigh*

*cut to black*

[hotgirlsforicp]

My old Dirk ships uquiz is circulating again and it’s stressing me out . Guys .

[egberts]

[timelordsandkittens]

it's always bad for adults to interact with minors, which is why when I was born my mother was positioned at the window and I was birthed down a giant slip n slide that safely transported me to the hospital grounds, where I was quickly accepted and raised by a gang of feral babies who were born under similar circumstances. and that's why my posts are so bad

[timelordsandkittens]

Hey what the fuck happens in homestuck

[fallow-grove]

yknow what would be a fucked up phone feature

[ahno-nimus]

No, I don't. Please, proceed.

[fallow-grove]

if whenever you plugged it in you had to manually enable charging mode and there was no built in way to automate it

[ahno-nimus]

That would be fucked up.

[fallow-grove]

yknow what would be more fucked up

[ahno-nimus]

Football field full of viruses.

[ahno-nimus]

Abraham Lincoln teeth sculpture.

[ahno-nimus]

Really big vampire.

[ahno-nimus]

Inside-out Sweden.

[fallow-grove]

if they added automatic charging mode but paywalled it

[ahno-nimus]

Yeah that's pretty fucked up.

[pastacrylic]

[pastacrylic]

Weakling. You will not survive the winter.

[offkilterkeys]

He’s like if we let men understand human emotion.