When Olivia Rodrigo said "I'm so sick of myself" and when Mxmtoon said " i hold so many small regrets" and when Girl in red said "i just want to disappear"
I felt that
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@houseonthecliffside
When Olivia Rodrigo said "I'm so sick of myself" and when Mxmtoon said " i hold so many small regrets" and when Girl in red said "i just want to disappear"
I felt that
i judge myself by standards of evil
i want a man not some bit h who goes "i didnt know i need to better before you came" bitch you lack self retrospection
the internet is a place for reading wikipedia articles and watching every movie for free. social media is an invasive species. never forget this
âAnd no one is me. No one is you. This is solitude.â
â Clarice Lispector, Ăgua Viva
when he sees me and hugs me and whispers I missed you , I'm gonna melt right there
i was never yours to keep
you were never mine to lose
tanka #7, tathev simonyan
Dr. Gachey with foxglove, 1890
Some of Van Goghâs best work was done during a period of his life that he spent in a hospital being treated for his mental health problems. I could be wrong but I think Starry Night was among those.
This is consistently the case. Creators tend to do their best work when they are in a healthy place and receiving proper treatment and not being self destructive in their efforts to cope. Go figure.
All our experiences, good and bad, inform what we create, but suffering is not the price of great art. Suffering is what prevents artists from completing great art.
(I bring to mind this @tkingfisher / Ursula Verson quote about once a week <3)
[alt text and transcript of posts. First post from wenchyfloozymoo. A series of still screenshots of Australian writer/comedian Hannah Gadsby speaking and gesturing expressively at a mic, with captions as follows.]
But IâA couple of years ago, a man came up to me after⊠my show. He had an opinion. Now, in the show, Iâd spoken about taking antidepressant medication, and he had an opinion on that. Now, interestingly, Iâd also spoken about how unhelpful unsolicited advice is in a⊠mental health plan, but he mustnât have heard that bit. He said, âYou shouldnât take medication because youâre an artist. Itâs important that you feel.â He said, âIf Vincent van Gogh had have taken medication, we wouldnât have the sunflowers.â I never, ever, ever thought that my art history degree would ever come in handy. I tore that man a college debt-sized new arsehole. I said, âGood opinion, mate. Except that he did medicate. He self-medicated a lot. He drank a lot. He even nibbled on his own paints. He didnât just paint sunflowers, he did quite a few portraits of psychiatrists. Not even random ones. Psychiatrists who were treating him. And medicating him. And thereâs one particular portrait of one particular psychiatrist, and heâs holding a flower, and it isnât a sunflower. Itâs a foxglove. And that foxglove forms part of a medication that Van GoghâŠtook for epilepsy. And that derivative of the foxglove plant medi-fucking-cationâŠâ I must have skipped a dose that day âcause I was feeling. âThe derivative of the foxglove, if you overdose it a bit, you know what happens? You can experience the color yellow a little too intensely. So perhaps⊠we have the sunflowers precisely because⊠Van Gogh medicated. What do you honestly think, mate?â I said. âThat creativity means you must suffer? That is the burden of creativity? Just so you can enjoy it? Fuck you, mate. If you like sunflowers so much, buy a bunch and jerk off into a geranium.â
[second post by waterâdamage is an image of the Van Gogh painting described, in the artistâs distinctive swirling textured style. It shows a man with light coloured hair, heavy hooded eyes and a mustache, wearing a white hat and dark coat. He rests his cheek against one hand and leans on it as he looks thoughtfully in a direction just slightly to the right of the viewer. His opposite hand rests on a vivid red-orange table with the foxglove plant.]
[following the third post in text by dovewithscales, another screenshot from redshoesnblueskies of a quote from American artist/writer Ursula Vernon.]
âIf ONE MORE PERSON says âWhat if theyâd medicated Van Gogh!?â I think Iâm permitted to set things on fire. If theyâd medicated Van Gogh, heâd either have painted twice as much, or heâd have been happy and unproductive. And you know what? Starry Night wasnât worth a terrible price in human misery. Itâs neat. It wasnât worth it. Sometimes I wonder if being an artist makes me jaded to ART. Because itâs not magic and itâs not mystical, itâs just paint or pixels. And it can do amazing things! But you donât owe humanity to be miserable just so you can move paint around in interesting shapes. Jesus. Art is not some kind of Ones Who Walk Away From Omelas bargain where you agree to be miserable so everybody can go âoh! Neat!â for 5 minutes.â
Ursula Vernon, dropping the mic.
i wish to kill myself
if you love someone, you choose them. you put them above yourself, you abandon the thought of 'self' and choose them every second of everyday.
all my memories seems performative
do women cry at their own making, a son , a love she never had because her father wanted a son, a son she wants so much love of. do women cry at their own making?
who are you satisfying, not me for sure
all i do is hit myself, cut myself in hopes that my mental strain would be less but all i get is more and more pain
your false advocacy of love that i fell for makes me pity my own stupid self , the importance i gave away and the importance i never received just makes me another loser. the urge to explain things and demand other things, the false entitlement i still feel to get some justification out of you just makes me another loser. any hope that i held close to my heart , it makes me a loser. I'll go away , this was never my place to begin with because i just fell for some words that came out of your mouth. and the regret i have for changing your name to the first one i gave. it was a horror show, i should've hold on to the anger , atleast i wouldn't be sad.