How I Learned to Cope

Coping skills & resources to help you deal, especially for those with chronic illness. Anyone can reblog :)

[howilearnedtocope]

Hello friends, it’s been a minute

[howilearnedtocope]

Traveling with chronic illness tips

Be smart, but be brave! As long as you aren’t putting your safety at risk don’t be afraid to try things and see how it goes. It might surprise you.

Plan ahead! You want to carefully consider all the medical things you use in your normal life and make sure you can bring enough for your entire trip plus some. That might mean getting meds refilled ahead of time. Make sure you count out all your pills before you leave just to be safe. Don’t forget about things you might not use every day like a rescue inhaler or maybe things like a heating pad that make your life much easier.

Don’t let comparisons to healthy people get you down. If you’re traveling with healthy people they might be able to do more than you. That is okay! You can have a deeply fun and meaningful experience even if you don’t do every last thing. Focus on all the fun stuff you ARE doing. Your trip is likely a whole lot more fun and exciting than your daily life and that is the real comparison that matters not what some healthy person could theoretically do.

Don’t be afraid to rest. You’ll have to make the judgement call, but sometimes resting might be better for your overall enjoyment than squeezing one more event out of the day.

Make it easy. A good system can really minimize the time and mental energy spent managing your medical care. For example, when I studied abroad we took many weekend trips around the country. Packing used to take me a long time gathering all my medical supplies and making sure I didn’t forget any. So I kept all the medical stuff I used in a bag instead of unpacking it. That way I could just grab that whole bag as a unit when we traveled, greatly reducing my time packing and making it less likely I would forget anything. I also had a small pouch with stuff I might need on a day trip (meds I take during the day, rescue inhalers, sunscreen, etc) which I could just transfer between bags which was much easier on a daily basis than thinking of each item individually.

Make pill boxes (once you’re there). For the same reason as above I highly recommend pill boxes, especially if you take more than 1 or 2 meds. It saves a lot of time and thought. Most pillboxes have detachable compartments so you can easily throw a day or two of meds in your bag. However, to reduce the chance of having an issue with airport security, you might want to travel with the meds in their original bottles and then make pill boxes when you get there. I often just make pill boxes immediately after arriving in my destination and then don’t have to think about it again.

Idiot proof your medical routines. The great part about traveling is it tends to get you out of your normal routines and habits. However, for medical care that can mean you make mistakes like missing medications when you never would at home, so go out of your way to idiot proof the things you need to do. Set alarms on your phone to remind you to take your meds even if you don’t use them at home. Put important meds on top of your bag so you can’t forget them, or even just keep them in your day bag so you will always have access if you do forget.

Communicate. I understand the temptation to not explain your medical needs, especially if they are complicated. However, I find that often just leads to more problems and miscommunications. Often it is easier to just be honest with the people around you about what is going on.

Have fun! I was so nervous to manage my complex medical care abroad, but in the end it was all so worth it. I am glad I was brave enough to take it on and I hope you can too :)

[howilearnedtocope]

Signal boost - study abroad for free for US Pell Recipients

The Gilman Scholarship is an amazing opportunity for US undergrad students receiving Pell Grants to study or intern abroad with funding from the state department. It is designed to give opportunities to students who wouldn’t otherwise be able to afford it. If you think you might be eligible I would definitely encourage you to apply! The program can help pay for everything from transportation, program fees, tuition, expenses in the country, even paying for a passport/visa. The program especially looks to help students with disabilities, bipoc students, students at 2 year institutions, and other groups that are underrepresented studying abroad.

I really like this program because it realizes that it is important for all kinds of students to be able to travel abroad, not just the privileged. They realize that building international relationships is good for the US, for the world, and for our own lives. And then they actually give you a way to afford the whole thing! In my case, the award and some money I got from my university let me study abroad without paying a cent.

This is a really important program — please help signal boost this so more people who are eligible can find out about it and apply.

To learn more about how to apply visit their website here.

[howilearnedtocope]

I love that you are posting again! As in - even if it's only today and a single post, I was slightly screaming (of joy) when I got the notification that you posted! I hope you are doing well <3 (and pls no pressure, I was just excited and wanted to wish you all the best)

Aw you are so sweet :) I have a couple posts coming about traveling and chronic illness (please excuse the weird timing lol, I originally agreed to make these back in 2019).

My main life is pretty busy right now because I just started grad school which is super exciting but I don't expect to have a ton of time to post here. It wasn't that long ago that I was almost house bound with chronic illness and now I am doing all these things. Still hard to believe sometimes but in a good way <3

I may try to make some update posts about all these things because I remember finding similar things helpful

[cryptonature]

You can love yourself and still desire to change.

I love my garden, but I plant new things constantly.

My love doesn't require immutability.

[howilearnedtocope]

3 types of self soothing thoughts

Validation - it’s ok that I hurt and want to feel better

Reassurance - I can handle this pain, even though it hurts and I don’t like it

Perspective taking: I’ve had bad days like this before, and my record of making it through them is 100%. I can also remember my better days, and know I’m not always hurting this much 

Concept from Depressed and Anxious, which is hands down the best and most useful book on DBT skills I’ve ever seen. I highly recommend it! 

[howilearnedtocope]

How to change your mood while honoring your feelings

So this is a pretty complicated subject, but here are the basics

Don’t judge yourself for having emotions. Remind yourself it’s ok to feel whatever you are feeling. It doesn’t make you broken or a bad person, and there is nothing to be guilty or ashamed of. Try to just accept the emotion without being sad or angry that you are experiencing it

Assess the situation. The first step is to identify what emotions you are feeling. (This may be help if you are stuck). The second is to figure out what thoughts or events (if any) triggered it. For example you might feel angry because you were treated poorly, or sad because you were thinking about all the ways you believe you have failed. Worksheets such as this one may help you with this and the following steps

Make a plan to address any issues now, or if the emotions are too intense, make a point to come back to this later. For example, if you are stressed about the amount of work you have due, your action could be to make a plan for what work to do each day, email your professor about an extension, and to identify and challenge the assumption that turning in a project late makes you a failure. DBT & CBT tools can help you identify and work through the process of doing this

Do something sensory. Focusing on your senses can be a very effective way to get out of your head, and allow your emotions to fade naturally. You could simply observe what’s around you (such as listing things you can see or hear), or you could create a pleasant experience by putting on a favorite song, using scents you enjoy, doing something with your hands, or some combination of these things. 

Remind yourself of things you have a positive association with You could remind yourself of a favorite memory, think of something you are grateful for today, read a message from a loved one, look at a photograph that you like, or imagine you are in your favorite place. Make sure you aren’t doing this to force yourself not the feel the emotion, but rather focusing your attention on something pleasant and being open to however your emotions change. It is important you follow steps 2 & 3 if you choose to go this route. However, if you are facing a thought you have all the time and you have already worked through those steps in a similar situation you may be able to go straight here.

[howilearnedtocope]

It’s ok if you you don’t make the most out of every day. 

Was the weather beautiful today and you didn’t enjoy it? That’s fine. Don’t worry about maximizing every single moment. Try to focus on enjoying what you can while making room for some positive experiences in your life. It’s ok if you miss a few opportunities in the process. The important thing is enjoying what you can and not worrying too much about what you miss 

[howilearnedtocope]

Things to consider if you’re overwhelmed by the thought of being sick or in pain the rest of your life

1.You don’t need to live the rest of your life all at once. You only need to survive this minute, this second.

2. Pain is just one component of your experience. It influences, but does not define who you are, the good you can do for the world, the things you can accomplish, or the joy you can feel.

3. It’s ok to be scared or angry about the future. Your feelings are never wrong, and there is nothing wrong with you for having them. But you can question the thoughts behind them. Illness is very unpredictable, and things might be better than you expect

There might be breakthroughs in treatment of your condition. Medicine is moving really fast, and there are even drugs being developed that treat the underlying cause of genetic illnesses, like one approved for cystic fibrosis this year.

There might be a breakthrough in management of your condition. Pain management is a relatively new field, and is quickly improving. Pain, recovery times, and outcomes from things like surgical procedures are getting better quickly.

You might have a personal breakthrough. Maybe you get a new (correct) diagnosis that leads to better treatment, have success with an existing treatment, or identify a trigger for existing problems. Maybe a brace or mobility device you haven’t tried reduces your pain level and gives you new freedom. Maybe it’s a combination of lots of things, each helping a little bit.

4. Your perspective and ability to handle your illness might change dramatically. When I got sick at 17 I found it intolerable, and dreaded living the rest of my life that way. Today I’m 21 and feel SO differently. I still have pain but I’m happy, I enjoy myself, I love my life. Many things get easier to handle as you mature, and we are resilient creatures. Things won’t always seem this hard.

5. Try to turn your fear into savoring what you still have in the present moment. If you fear losing the ability to do or enjoy something in the future, trying to really savor it now. Don’t let your fear of losing it in the future keep you from doing it now. Create lots of good memories for later. Focus on your gratitude for still having this thing. Really enjoy all the little details when you’re in the middle of it.

[howilearnedtocope]

Hey - if you fear you’re faking your mental illness bc you identify with basically every illness you read about, that’s probably bc there are huge amounts of overlap between diagnoses as currently defined and not because you are a Terrible Person™. Plus this is a SUPER common fear among people with mental illness (thanks society) and I don’t think that worrying about this means it’s actually true!

also it’s very common to have mental illness that doesn’t fit neatly in one box or requires multiple diagnoses in order to cover all your symptoms. That’s bc the labels are inadequate - not bc you’re extra fucked up or bc you’re faking it.

[jude-elizabeth-winchester]

 I CAN’T STRESS THIS SHIT ENOUGH, LIKE DAMN SON

[lgtbird]

Mental illnesses are not like (most) physical diseases, where one thing (like a pathogen) causes some of all of a collection of symptoms. Mental illness diagnoses are usually just collections of symptoms that tend to go together (and often have many many different possible causes, like depression). So having symptoms that don’t neatly fit into a diagnosis is normal because diagnoses are more like trends and less like concrete things that define a person

[howilearnedtocope]

Yes, except there are SO many physical illnesses that are actually just constellations of symptoms too. You’d be surprised how few diseases we actually can narrow down to a specific cause in comparison to the number where it’s a set of symptoms we know goes together or an umbrella term for a bunch of different things with a similar cause. For example, when you get into the weeds of autoimmune diseases, the labeling is a total mess.

And even when we know the cause perfectly, lots of physical conditions overlap in symptoms, and often you can end up with multiple diagnoses because of this or leave your doctors unsure of what exactly is causing a specific problem. (Or at the very least, identify with people who have a different diagnosis than you). All totally normal, there is SO much we do not know.

Tl;dr the brain and body are very complicated, and so are the ways they fail. There is still a vast amount we do not understand and so a lot of diagnoses are just groupings of similar problems that are useful to us in some way.

You should probably think of mental illness the same way.

[howilearnedtocope]

Why we need masks for all

Okay, I am going to put myself out here: we need masks for all. If you live in a country that doesn’t have widespread use of masks in public, this one is for you.

Here is a graph of coronavirus trajectories by country. All those countries in blue have widespread public use of masks, in addition to other measures.

Obviously I am not basing all of this on a few countries that have managed to slow the spread. Here is a link to a summary of 33 scientific papers that show that masks (even handmade ones, we’ll get to that) reduce spread of infection for the general population. Many of these studies are themselves meta-analyses of data. The evidence is mounting that public mask usage is an important strategy to reduce COVID-19 transmission. I want to highlight this paper in particular which modeled that public mask usage could slow or even stop the spread of an influenza pandemic.

(The CDC and WHO still maintain that healthy people should not wear masks. Preserving them for healthcare workers is important, but that is a separate question from whether they work or not. It seems likely from the evidence presented above that they do help at least somewhat)

Of course, there is a nationwide shortage of masks in most countries. Medical grade masks must be reserved for healthcare workers (if you have some, look for local ways to donate them, many hospitals are accepting donations). So where do we get the masks for the public? We follow the lead of the Czech Republic and Taiwan and make our own. Here is a great summary of how the Czech Republic went from 0 to 100% public mask usage, in less than two weeks.

A person makes masks and a “mask tree” where neighbors could donate handmade masks to others. Note that masks (or anything really) can be effectively sterilized by heating above 70C (158F) either in the oven for paper masks or using regular cycle in your washer and dryer for cloth masks.

Studies have shown even basic household materials like t-shirts can be effective at blocking droplets that contain viruses.

Are they as good as n95 respirators? No. But outside of certain medical procedures, the disease mainly spreads through droplets, and these homemade masks are still pretty good (though not perfect) at blocking those. This goes both ways: the masks provide a layer of protection to protect you, but ALSO contain a lot of the droplets you could be spreading. Some people with the disease don’t have any symptoms at all, so wearing masks is also important to reduce the chance of infecting others.

Masks, like social distancing, don’t have to be 100% effective in order to help flatten the curve.

Here is a model from the Seattle area, which shows how small changes in social contacts can effect total case numbers. You can see that even reducing contacts 25% has a profound effect on case numbers after a few weeks. The same thing would be true if wearing masks reduced transmissions by just 25%.

I want to point out that as long as you don’t take risks you wouldn’t take otherwise and keep your hands off the mask, there is very little risk to doing this now as we wait for further scientific evidence. And the evidence is mounting that simple masks reduce risk and slow spread.

In the Czech republic, they went from no one wearing masks to 100% (it is now mandatory in public) in about 10 days. While the mandatory order to cover your mouth and nose is only a week old, they have seen a slower growth of cases than the rest of Europe despite lots of testing.

Basic masks can be made with just a t-shirt and scissors, no sewing required. This video shows you how, just wear your mask higher on your face than this guy. (Video is changed from original post to one that doesn’t require Facebook login)

And a few more tutorials

DIY facemask with filter pocket from Maker’s Habitat (video)

Facemask with adjustable wire and filter pocket from Easy2Sew (video)

Craft Passion Face Mask Pattern (pattern & instructions)

A Dr Explains how to make a facemask from a HEPA filter (video)

Simple mask that can be made with a sewing machine, from Craft Passion

If you get good at making homemade masks, especially the ones with HEPA filters, some hospitals are now accepting donations of homemade masks as well. Check to see what is going on in your local area.

If the papers cited above are correct, wearing a mask now when you need to leave the house for essential chores will reduce the time it takes to bring our cases down, and public use of masks could be invaluable in keeping cases low when people start to go back to work.

We can change our culture from stigmatizing masks to expecting people wear them. It happened in the Czech Republic in less than two weeks. We can do it too.

If you have the time, please watch this video. It was the thing that really made all of this click for me, and it has a ton of great information. Here is a shorter video from the Czech youtuber who started the movement in his country which I also recommend watching & sharing.

Please reblog & add resouces, tutorials, or mask selfies! There are three main things you can do to help spread the word and normalize mask wearing: 1) share videos & other information on the topic; 2) take a selfie of you wearing a home-made mask; 3) spread the message, with hashtag #masks4all.

[howilearnedtocope]

March 30th updates:

A lot has happened in the four days since I wrote the post. Some news:

Austria Requires Masks in Supermarkets

Bulgaria makes wearing a protective mask in public places compulsory

George Gao, director-general of the Chinese CDC, gave an interview about the biggest mistakes other countries are making:

“The big mistake in the U.S. and Europe, in my opinion, is that people aren’t wearing masks. This virus is transmitted by droplets and close contact. Droplets play a very important role—you’ve got to wear a mask, because when you speak, there are always droplets coming out of your mouth. Many people have asymptomatic or presymptomatic infections. If they are wearing face masks, it can prevent droplets that carry the virus from escaping and infecting others.”

President of Slovakia, Zuzana Chepalova has been matching her masks to her outfits this week. Slovakia has also made masks mandatory in public.

A team of public health experts at American Enterprise Institute included public use of masks a key part of their strategy:

There is emerging evidence that asymptomatic and presymptomatic transmission of COVID-19 is possible, which complicates efforts to pursue case-based interventions. To reduce this risk during Phase I, everyone, including people without symptoms, should be encouraged to wear nonmedical fabric face masks while in public

(Link - it’s worth reading the whole section on masks if you are interested)

US Senator Pat Toomey calls for the public to wear homemade masks to prevent the spread of covid-19. 

Not news, but important, here is the conclusion of a study that evaluated homemade masks against surgical and n95 respirators for protection against respiratory infection:

“Any type of general mask use is likely to decrease viral exposure and infection risk on a population level, in spite of imperfect fit and imperfect adherence, personal respirators providing most protection. Masks worn by patients may not offer as great a degree of protection against aerosol transmission.”

A great new summary video to share, featuring experts from the Czech medical community and the Minister of Health of the Czech Republic:

In addition to the t-shirt method in the original post, here are three more face-covering tutorials that do not require a sewing machine:

This one is disposable!

Here is how to turn a t-shirt into an impromptu face covering, no cutting or sewing required.

5 more new sew styles. Could potentially be reinforced with a paper towel, or additional cloth.

I want to end with a plea not to treat the masks as a substitute for quarantine, social distancing, hygiene etc. The biggest fear in recommending masks to the public is that people might get a false sense of security from them. If people use masks as an excuse to take these other precautions less seriously, it could undo any benefit they have and even make the situation worse. If you wear a mask, you MUST continue with all the social distancing and hygiene measures as before. Don’t think of the mask as permission to do risky things: think of it as a constant reminder of how careful we must be.

Remember, mask or not: isolate yourself when sick, stay home as much as possible, keep a safe distance from others when you must go out, avoid touching your face, and wash your hands frequently and well! We need to do everything we can to get through this thing.

[sadiie]

In the czech republic the change was done exactly overnight. Coverage of mouth and nose was made mandatory by the government after closing schools and services, declaring the state of emergency and combined with the stay at home rule. Some people used store bought which they still had, hankies or scarfs and a few days later, almost everyone had home sewn ones.

The masks are made of cotton or linen fabrics, shirts, bed sheets etc boiled and ironed, exchanged after every usage. They are an excellent option for the general public as the professional ones should be saved for medics and other critical service staff.

Now a few czech companies are working on non woven filter fabrics that will be cut and inserted into these masks so the protection is even more effective.

According to the epidemiologist Roman Prymula who runs the show, the mandatory usage of masks was significant in slowing the spread.

We do not wear them because we don’t want to get infected, we wear them because we’re mindful of other people and groups at risk.The usage of masks lowers the spread of aerosol emission from your mouth by almost 80%.

Side note, the president of Slovakia is Zuzana Čaputová. Yes diacritic is important.

[howilearnedtocope]

Thanks for sharing your perspective - the Czech Republic is really an inspiration for so many other countries right now and we have so much to learn from you!

It seems we are finally starting to catch up to you here in the USA. Today, April 3rd, the US CDC started recommending that we wear fabric masks or facial coverings when we go out in public.

US friends, it is time to get to work making masks, educating friends & family, and setting a good example by wearing them for essential activities. The Czech Republic proved that it is possible to change the culture around masks. Now it’s our turn to change the culture here.

[howilearnedtocope]

Why we need masks for all

Okay, I am going to put myself out here: we need masks for all. If you live in a country that doesn’t have widespread use of masks in public, this one is for you.

Here is a graph of coronavirus trajectories by country. All those countries in blue have widespread public use of masks, in addition to other measures.

Obviously I am not basing all of this on a few countries that have managed to slow the spread. Here is a link to a summary of 33 scientific papers that show that masks (even handmade ones, we’ll get to that) reduce spread of infection for the general population. Many of these studies are themselves meta-analyses of data. The evidence is mounting that public mask usage is an important strategy to reduce COVID-19 transmission. I want to highlight this paper in particular which modeled that public mask usage could slow or even stop the spread of an influenza pandemic.

(The CDC and WHO still maintain that healthy people should not wear masks. Preserving them for healthcare workers is important, but that is a separate question from whether they work or not. It seems likely from the evidence presented above that they do help at least somewhat)

Of course, there is a nationwide shortage of masks in most countries. Medical grade masks must be reserved for healthcare workers (if you have some, look for local ways to donate them, many hospitals are accepting donations). So where do we get the masks for the public? We follow the lead of the Czech Republic and Taiwan and make our own. Here is a great summary of how the Czech Republic went from 0 to 100% public mask usage, in less than two weeks.

A person makes masks and a “mask tree” where neighbors could donate handmade masks to others. Note that masks (or anything really) can be effectively sterilized by heating above 70C (158F) either in the oven for paper masks or using regular cycle in your washer and dryer for cloth masks.

Studies have shown even basic household materials like t-shirts can be effective at blocking droplets that contain viruses.

Are they as good as n95 respirators? No. But outside of certain medical procedures, the disease mainly spreads through droplets, and these homemade masks are still pretty good (though not perfect) at blocking those. This goes both ways: the masks provide a layer of protection to protect you, but ALSO contain a lot of the droplets you could be spreading. Some people with the disease don’t have any symptoms at all, so wearing masks is also important to reduce the chance of infecting others.

Masks, like social distancing, don’t have to be 100% effective in order to help flatten the curve.

Here is a model from the Seattle area, which shows how small changes in social contacts can effect total case numbers. You can see that even reducing contacts 25% has a profound effect on case numbers after a few weeks. The same thing would be true if wearing masks reduced transmissions by just 25%.

I want to point out that as long as you don’t take risks you wouldn’t take otherwise and keep your hands off the mask, there is very little risk to doing this now as we wait for further scientific evidence. And the evidence is mounting that simple masks reduce risk and slow spread.

In the Czech republic, they went from no one wearing masks to 100% (it is now mandatory in public) in about 10 days. While the mandatory order to cover your mouth and nose is only a week old, they have seen a slower growth of cases than the rest of Europe despite lots of testing.

Basic masks can be made with just a t-shirt and scissors, no sewing required. This video shows you how, just wear your mask higher on your face than this guy. (Video is changed from original post to one that doesn’t require Facebook login)

And a few more tutorials

DIY facemask with filter pocket from Maker’s Habitat (video)

Facemask with adjustable wire and filter pocket from Easy2Sew (video)

Craft Passion Face Mask Pattern (pattern & instructions)

A Dr Explains how to make a facemask from a HEPA filter (video)

Simple mask that can be made with a sewing machine, from Craft Passion

If you get good at making homemade masks, especially the ones with HEPA filters, some hospitals are now accepting donations of homemade masks as well. Check to see what is going on in your local area.

If the papers cited above are correct, wearing a mask now when you need to leave the house for essential chores will reduce the time it takes to bring our cases down, and public use of masks could be invaluable in keeping cases low when people start to go back to work.

We can change our culture from stigmatizing masks to expecting people wear them. It happened in the Czech Republic in less than two weeks. We can do it too.

If you have the time, please watch this video. It was the thing that really made all of this click for me, and it has a ton of great information. Here is a shorter video from the Czech youtuber who started the movement in his country which I also recommend watching & sharing.

Please reblog & add resouces, tutorials, or mask selfies! There are three main things you can do to help spread the word and normalize mask wearing: 1) share videos & other information on the topic; 2) take a selfie of you wearing a home-made mask; 3) spread the message, with hashtag #masks4all.

[howilearnedtocope]

March 30th updates:

A lot has happened in the four days since I wrote the post. Some news:

Austria Requires Masks in Supermarkets

Bulgaria makes wearing a protective mask in public places compulsory

George Gao, director-general of the Chinese CDC, gave an interview about the biggest mistakes other countries are making:

“The big mistake in the U.S. and Europe, in my opinion, is that people aren’t wearing masks. This virus is transmitted by droplets and close contact. Droplets play a very important role—you’ve got to wear a mask, because when you speak, there are always droplets coming out of your mouth. Many people have asymptomatic or presymptomatic infections. If they are wearing face masks, it can prevent droplets that carry the virus from escaping and infecting others.”

President of Slovakia, Zuzana Chepalova has been matching her masks to her outfits this week. Slovakia has also made masks mandatory in public.

A team of public health experts at American Enterprise Institute included public use of masks a key part of their strategy:

There is emerging evidence that asymptomatic and presymptomatic transmission of COVID-19 is possible, which complicates efforts to pursue case-based interventions. To reduce this risk during Phase I, everyone, including people without symptoms, should be encouraged to wear nonmedical fabric face masks while in public

(Link - it’s worth reading the whole section on masks if you are interested)

US Senator Pat Toomey calls for the public to wear homemade masks to prevent the spread of covid-19. 

Not news, but important, here is the conclusion of a study that evaluated homemade masks against surgical and n95 respirators for protection against respiratory infection:

“Any type of general mask use is likely to decrease viral exposure and infection risk on a population level, in spite of imperfect fit and imperfect adherence, personal respirators providing most protection. Masks worn by patients may not offer as great a degree of protection against aerosol transmission.”

A great new summary video to share, featuring experts from the Czech medical community and the Minister of Health of the Czech Republic:

In addition to the t-shirt method in the original post, here are three more face-covering tutorials that do not require a sewing machine:

This one is disposable!

Here is how to turn a t-shirt into an impromptu face covering, no cutting or sewing required.

5 more new sew styles. Could potentially be reinforced with a paper towel, or additional cloth.

I want to end with a plea not to treat the masks as a substitute for quarantine, social distancing, hygiene and other measures. The biggest fear in recommending masks to the public is that people might get a false sense of security from them. If people use masks as an excuse to take these other precautions less seriously, it could undo any benefit they have and even make the situation worse. If you wear a mask, you MUST continue with all the social distancing and hygiene measures as before. Don’t think of the mask as permission to do risky things: think of it as a constant reminder of how careful we must be.

Mask or not: isolate yourself when sick, stay home as much as possible, keep a safe distance from others when you must go out, avoid touching your face, and wash your hands frequently and well.

Stay safe y’all. These are wild times

[howilearnedtocope]

Emotional reactions aren’t a test you can pass or fail, and there is no such thing as feeling the wrong emotion, or feeling too strongly about something. Emotions aren’t there to show if you’re a good person, if you’re functional, mature, worthy, or lovable. 

No, emotions are there to give YOU information about the world and your interactions with it. They are a sense, they are information. They can be powerful, even overwhelming, but they’re never wrong, and there is no such thing as a shameful or embarrassing way to feel. <3

[howilearnedtocope]

Why we need masks for all

Okay, I am going to put myself out here: we need masks for all. If you live in a country that doesn’t have widespread use of masks in public, this one is for you.

Here is a graph of coronavirus trajectories by country. All those countries in blue have widespread public use of masks, in addition to other measures.

Obviously I am not basing all of this on a few countries that have managed to slow the spread. Here is a link to a summary of 33 scientific papers that show that masks (even handmade ones, we’ll get to that) reduce spread of infection for the general population. Many of these studies are themselves meta-analyses of data. The evidence is mounting that public mask usage is an important strategy to reduce COVID-19 transmission. I want to highlight this paper in particular which modeled that public mask usage could slow or even stop the spread of an influenza pandemic.

(The CDC and WHO still maintain that healthy people should not wear masks. Preserving them for healthcare workers is important, but that is a separate question from whether they work or not. It seems likely from the evidence presented above that they do help at least somewhat)

Of course, there is a nationwide shortage of masks in most countries. Medical grade masks must be reserved for healthcare workers (if you have some, look for local ways to donate them, many hospitals are accepting donations). So where do we get the masks for the public? We follow the lead of the Czech Republic and Taiwan and make our own. Here is a great summary of how the Czech Republic went from 0 to 100% public mask usage, in less than two weeks.

A person makes masks and a “mask tree” where neighbors could donate handmade masks to others. Note that masks (or anything really) can be effectively sterilized by heating above 70C (158F) either in the oven for paper masks or using regular cycle in your washer and dryer for cloth masks.

Studies have shown even basic household materials like t-shirts can be effective at blocking droplets that contain viruses.

Are they as good as n95 respirators? No. But outside of certain medical procedures, the disease mainly spreads through droplets, and these homemade masks are still pretty good (though not perfect) at blocking those. This goes both ways: the masks provide a layer of protection to protect you, but ALSO contain a lot of the droplets you could be spreading. Some people with the disease don’t have any symptoms at all, so wearing masks is also important to reduce the chance of infecting others.

Masks, like social distancing, don’t have to be 100% effective in order to help flatten the curve.

Here is a model from the Seattle area, which shows how small changes in social contacts can effect total case numbers. You can see that even reducing contacts 25% has a profound effect on case numbers after a few weeks. The same thing would be true if wearing masks reduced transmissions by just 25%.

I want to point out that as long as you don’t take risks you wouldn’t take otherwise and keep your hands off the mask, there is very little risk to doing this now as we wait for further scientific evidence. And the evidence is mounting that simple masks reduce risk and slow spread.

In the Czech republic, they went from no one wearing masks to 100% (it is now mandatory in public) in about 10 days. While the mandatory order to cover your mouth and nose is only a week old, they have seen a slower growth of cases than the rest of Europe despite lots of testing.

Basic masks can be made with just a t-shirt and scissors, no sewing required. This video shows you how, just wear your mask higher on your face than this guy. (Video is changed from original post to one that doesn’t require Facebook login)

And a few more tutorials

DIY facemask with filter pocket from Maker’s Habitat (video)

Facemask with adjustable wire and filter pocket from Easy2Sew (video)

Craft Passion Face Mask Pattern (pattern & instructions)

A Dr Explains how to make a facemask from a HEPA filter (video)

Simple mask that can be made with a sewing machine, from Craft Passion

If you get good at making homemade masks, especially the ones with HEPA filters, some hospitals are now accepting donations of homemade masks as well. Check to see what is going on in your local area.

If the papers cited above are correct, wearing a mask now when you need to leave the house for essential chores will reduce the time it takes to bring our cases down, and public use of masks could be invaluable in keeping cases low when people start to go back to work.

We can change our culture from stigmatizing masks to expecting people wear them. It happened in the Czech Republic in less than two weeks. We can do it too.

If you have the time, please watch this video. It was the thing that really made all of this click for me, and it has a ton of great information. Here is a shorter video from the Czech youtuber who started the movement in his country which I also recommend watching & sharing.

Please reblog & add resouces, tutorials, or mask selfies! There are three main things you can do to help spread the word and normalize mask wearing: 1) share videos & other information on the topic; 2) take a selfie of you wearing a home-made mask; 3) spread the message, with hashtag #masks4all.

[howilearnedtocope]

I know giving up perfectionism can be scary, but is it really worth going through all this suffering to be maybe a tiny bit better at something? 

You deserve to enjoy life as it really is, not endlessly wish for a perfect version that can never really exist. You deserve peace from small problems ruining days that should be happy. You deserve to be proud of your real, imperfect self. You deserve to be able to actually pay attention to all of the good parts of life. You deserve to be happy. You deserve to be free.

As someone who has let go of this … I promise you, happiness and freedom give way more to me than perfectionism could.

[sheisrecovering]

🌸 SELF AFFIRMING STATEMENTS 🌸

I might have some faults, but I’m still a good person.

I care about myself and other people.

I accept who I am.

I love myself.

I’m a good person, not a mistake.

I’m good and nobody is perfect.

I embrace both my good and bad qualities.

Today I take responsibility for everything I do and say.

I’m becoming a better person every day.

I’m a sensitive person who experiences the world differently.

Each day I do the best I can.

Even though I forget sometimes, I’m still a good person.

Even though bad things happened to me in the past, I’m still a good person.

Even though I’ve made mistakes in the past, I’m still a good person.

I’m here for a reason.

There’s purpose to my life, even though I might not always see it.

I radically accept myself.

[howilearnedtocope]

Validate your own judgement as much as possible, especially when it comes to your own life!! 

 What you want to do when hanging out is just as important as what your friend wants 

If someone else doesn’t like something that you like, that doesn’t mean you’re wrong and shouldn’t wear/enjoy that thing 

When it comes to major life decisions, what you think is the most important thing. You can consult people you trust, but ultimately listen to your gut! 

You have a right to talk during conversations, and to express your thoughts and opinions 

Don’t write yourself off because you are less educated, mentally ill, neurodivergent, disabled, etc!! None of these things prevent you from having insightful and interesting things to say. They don’t invalidate your feelings. And most importantly, they don’t prevent you from knowing what is best for you!

[pendylion]

It is also always okay to keep around people who disagree with you.

I know it’s difficult to distinguish between people who don’t see you as a person and people who have a different opinion than you. However, you are never going to find someone who agrees with you all the time. Even if you do, you aren’t ever going to have an enriching life if you can’t find a mutual person with a different perspective.