i used to have night terrors about silly things. bugs and worms with their grasp on the things i loved. life, sight , swarmed by small little legs and parasitic chirps. i open my eyes now and i look at the people i love and i reach my hand out and i am so afraid that the ladybugs nestled underneath ny fingernails will emerge and blot everything out. i want to love so much that it hurts .














