hyacinthus

hello! welcome to the hyacinthus project! this is a recovery-based server for victims of incidents related to the Tall Man.

[hyacinthus-project]

Are we... infectious?

this is something I've heard afflicted people discuss before. while we don't have explicit evidence one way or the other, I personally don't believe that to necessarily be the case.

we ourselves aren't infectious- the tall man, however, could be argued as being. it spreads as we spread it- the more outsiders are exposed to it, the more open doors it has to walk through. you'll find through researching past instances that afflicted people take this very seriously at times, and have gone to drastic measures to prevent it.

I don't think that's necessary.

what I'm doing here would be unsafe- if it spread without limits. intention matters a lot, and whether or not it spreads is dependent on whether or not you allow it to. mind over matter is very important when it comes to working through this.

[hyacinthus-project]

hey guys! i've been getting a few asks about the upcoming server, and i did want to make it clear that this blog- currently- is specifically for me to answer questions and give advice about experiences with the tall man and related entities.

if you have questions about the server specifically, please reach out directly and dm me! i'm more than happy to answer questions about the server, but i'd rather not clog the blog up with questions about that when it's here to help you guys work through your experiences.

[hyacinthus-project]

Moving doesn't work for everyone, sometimes it follows

to be fair, I did say this in the previous post! ^^;

[hyacinthus-project]

hi everyone! i thought i should give you a more substantial and cohesive update on what's going on in my life and why i haven't been updating you as much.

in short... i'm moving! or rather, preparing to move. this is a huge deal to me since it's my first big move, and i've had to focus a lot of my time and energy on saving up and researching in preparation for it. i also consider this as being part of my recovery journey. i've been stuck in one place my entire life, and i believe that it's somewhat contributed to the things i've had to deal with. i don't know how long this will take, exactly, but i will keep all of you updated as i go!

my experiences with the tall man, i believe, are rooted in my stagnation. i intend to change this and move on.

i don't know if this will be helpful to everyone who has had experiences with the tall man, and uprooting oneself isn't the most accessible solution. in doing so, i hope i'm able to learn more about how to heal from this so i can pass it onto you all.

know that i haven't forgotten you. know that i will still be here.

know that HYACINTHUS will be here for you soon.

[hyacinthus-project]

Is the server still open? I have experiences and.. you know

hi! the server hasn't been opened up to the public just yet... i'm working on it, i promise. i've been really busy with work and other life stuff, but it's happening!! this project is really important to me, so i want it to be perfect for you guys.

in the meantime, feel free to send asks if you need any assistance or advice. i'll answer what i can here.

[hyacinthus-project]

work has been... so insanely busy. i should update you all more, i'm sorry. i haven't forgotten. i've been so tired, that's all.

[hyacinthus-project]

still here, I promise. things have been so busy. life gets you when you least expect it.

[hyacinthus-project]

furthermore; i will get to all your asks soon. wrapped up in work still, but i see them, i promise!!

i love you guys!! :')

[hyacinthus-project]

hi everyone!! i just wanted to give a little update since i haven't been very active.

i have not forgotten about this account, i promise!! i've just been really busy with school and work. as penance, here's a little teaser that may appease you:

i'll see you all soon! :D

[hyacinthus-project]

Does that make you Apollo?

good eye, anon! but no.

the reason i chose hyacinthus is because i identified with his story, not apollo's. apollo may have grown the hyacinths in his name, but it was hyacinthus's legacy.

i want my suffering to become something beautiful and help others.

[hyacinthus-project]

Why hyacinth?

hyacinthus was the lover of apollo, god of the sun, music, archery, etc. apollo accidentally killed hyacinthus, and mourned him by creating a new flower in the place of hyacinthus's body. the flower was his namesake; hyacinth.

the hyacinth itself has several different meanings, varying based on color. HYACINTHUS is represented by purple and blue: forgiveness and sincerity. they can also symbolize rebirth and change.

[hyacinthus-project]

i keep seeing people call this a cult but, i'm hopeful about this server.

i think, it'd be nice to find others that have been through similar situations. i've never.. met anyone before, honestly for the longest time i didn't know there was anyone else.

thank you for this.

unfortunately, there are many of us that have had to deal with all of this. some of us have dealt with it for years. only a few of us actually document our experiences, so it looks like there aren't nearly as many as there actually are.

there's safety and support in numbers, though. we can take an awful situation and make it into something good for us.

[hyacinthus-project]

Do you have a favorite tea?

earl gray. i'm a little bad about it, tho, i dump a lot of sugar in. i also like to throw a peppermint or two in.

[hyacinthus-project]

Wait, IS this a doomsday cult?

absolutely not, lol. i don't actually know how to respond to this because i'm baffled that i ever came off that way.

HYACINTHUS is just a support group for victims of incidents and entities related to the Tall Man. i, in NO way, am encouraging or organizing cult-like behaviors. this group is supposed to be a safe space for people to share their experiences and start the healing process with support from each other.

i do know that there have been a number of religious and cult-esque groups formed based off of the Tall Man and similar entities, and i welcome victims of those groups with open arms as well, but this is not another one of those.

hopefully this clears some things up. the last thing i want is for anyone to feel unnerved by or unsafe in HYACINTHUS. ^^;

[hyacinthus-project]

When does this open exactly? I'd like to meet some of the others who actually think.

soon, hopefully!! within the next month or two. i just have to get everything cleaned up and ready for you guys. it means a lot that you're interested!!

[hyacinthus-project]

Oh, dear… This just feels like cruelty for cruelty’s sake. It’s a nice thought, but it’s just that. A thought. Unless you mean for this to become a doomsday cult and we’re to all drink the punch in the end, I don’t see any universe where this goes well.

the pessimism within this community isn't exactly shocking, but it does kind of blow my mind how many of you are willing to reach out and put it on display.

the thought has already been put into motion. no one will be harmed by him anymore.

please, from now on; unless you have something new to say, or have a question for me, don't reach out like this. answering the same ask a hundred times won't make things any clearer. I won't be answering any more asks like this. this isn't a dig at you specifically, asker, you've been respectful. mostly.

[hyacinthus-project]

You think this HELPS? Spreading it around like a fucking MEME? Well, you sure are going to have a lot of people to talk to when you're done.

I'm living proof of recovery. whether or not you believe me is entirely up to you. after everything I went through, I fully understand your anger. it follows like a plague and it drains us of all that makes us human. we can take it back, but it's something you have to be willing to do.

clearly, not everyone is.

HYACINTHUS will be here when you are.