REBLOG if it's okay to send you dirty messages.
hmmmā¦.makes for an interesting readā¦yes..of courseā¦and yes i will respond⦠~grin
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Keni

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@hypnotic-violet
REBLOG if it's okay to send you dirty messages.
hmmmā¦.makes for an interesting readā¦yes..of courseā¦and yes i will respond⦠~grin
Whatās one mantra...
Whatās one mantra or line of brainwashing that you find particularly hot?
Please list when you reblog, thanks!
Brains are weird, guys.
For the past few days, the Boy and I have had company and, for the past few days, the only thing I have been able to focus on is my need to suck his cock.
And I do mean need. I cravedĀ it. I dreamedĀ about it. I would look at his crotch and feel my mouth start to water.Ā I needed to be on my knees and have his dick in my mouth. My whole being, body and mind, would not be satisfied until he was fucking my mouth. It was hard to write in my notebook of dirty thoughts for him because my mind was so preoccupied with how good it would feel when I could finally serve him by sucking his cock.
This is kind of new phenomenon for me. I am usually not into blowjobs. I have a horrible gag reflex and semen is one of thoseĀ āNOPEā substances. Itās a turn off to see it in a picture. I abhorĀ how it tastes (which is why itās never a blowjob to orgasm with the Boy). I know what his training has been, and heās not the one responsible for my overwhelming desire to serve his cock (he is partially responsible for my need to serve, but more on that in a bit).Ā
My subconscious has been spitting out some unusual desires lately: gags, leashes, a collar, rules for masturbating. Some of those are less surprising than others, but itās always interesting to where it thinks it wants to take things Anal wasnāt all that surprising, but blowjobs and a leash certainly are.
So, this morning, when our company left, he threw me down on the bed and started sucking at my tits, then ordered me to strip. He made me beg to serve him (and oh god, I was dripping at that), then allowed me to suck his cock.
It was beautiful.
It was like my brain just shut off. He was moaning. And me? I was totally fulfilled.
A lot of our trance training has focused on having serving him be my only thought when we play like this, on having all pleasure be rooted in serving him, in having serving him be an inherently pleasurable act. And itās training Iāve eaten up. This is what I wanted. Probably more intense brainwashing, but given the track of things, that will come in time.Ā
He ordered me to touch myself while he whispered new orders into my ear, then ordered me to cum to cement them, before fucking me senseless. It was, again, so fulfilling. Itās the second time heās watched me masturbate for him and itās rapidly becoming one of my favorite things; when I can focus enough to watch his face, his expressionās pretty damn good.Ā
Fun in the jacuzzi tub later this week, hopefully!Ā
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Your apartment ate my underwear.
Me to the Boy this morning
I write this as I lay dying in the hospital
The morning of August 9th, i was having a panic attack, and soothing myself by throwing my old burned DVDs out the window (I suppose visually and physically stimming) so my mother called the police (The Kitsap County Sherriff). That made my panic so much worse, I was catatonic. When they arrived they started slapping me, pinching me, and whispering threats of further violence if I didnāt ācomplyā as they kept putting it. I remained catatonic, experiencing everything but helpless to do anything. when they said they were going to tase me to death (I have a heart problem, which they knew about, and they used this fear to hurt me), my internal screaming for help became external screams for help.
My wife in the next room did nothing.
I was tackled, and then beaten, with special focus on punching the vertebra I just broke after they found out about it. I leave out the reason for this until here, because even now I have trouble believing it happened. But it happens every day.
To trans women.
Because weāre trans women.
They were called on a possible suicide attempt, and decided I needed to be ātaught how to be a manā. All the time theyāre hurting me, thereās a constant stream of slurs. And nobody did anything to stop them. They cuffed me tight enough to turn my hand black. 48 hours later, it is still numb. They literally threw me in the back of a cruiser head-first, rather than the ambulance waiting for me. When I got to the hospital (Harrison Memorial Hospital in Bremerton, WA), the nurse, a bald tattooed white man named Nic, immediately berated me, despite knowing nothing of my case, for āmaking wrong choicesā which, he expounded as I cried for help, is my real problem. I need to grow up, and always comply, he said. He was real big on that word, just like the cops were. He also refused to refer to my wife as my wife. When I told security I didnāt trust Nic to use needles on me, Nic took away my phone and threatened to strap me down and do it anyway. Then he did it.
The doctor, when he eventually arrived, told me the stress had made my blood acidic (ketoacidosis), and made my blood sugars so high I had a non-insignificant chance of dying. Theyāre trying to fix it, but the sugars arenāt down even after two insulin shots and 3 bags of IV fluid. Itās taken me two days just to convince them to document my injuries, and by now, theyāre a lot less visible.
Iām not asking for money. Iām not asking for help. I know I am powerless, and if they ever want to do it again, nobody will stop them. I just need someone to hear me. To believe me. And I need to warn you never, ever to deal with the Kitsap County Sheriff, or Harrison Memorial Hospital if you are a trans woman.
So many other women here in Kitsap have been contacting me because of this post, telling me similar stories. And every time, it ends the same: they donāt think they could ever possibly win, and so they donāt even try to fight. Iām not going to suggest these women endanger their own lives by coming forward. But my life is already over. If the strokes donāt get me, the fact that Iām blind, mentally and physically disabled, and now functionally homeless probably will. I have nobody left to protect. So fuck it.
My name is Michel C. Tanuki. I live in Port Orchard, Washington. Members of the Kitsap County Sheriff and the local Fire Department were on-site (whether the Fire Department paramedics took part in the beating, I cannot tell you, as I couldnāt see their faces). If I had any names or badge numbers, I would provide them. Two of the officers, I can identify in-person. Please spread this like wildfire. If the supposed āauthoritiesā wonāt do anything to help us, then we can at least help each-other.
That awkward moment when
You have total control over your orgasms (The Boy is on the other side of the country from last Monday until next Saturday D:) and you have 0 interest in having any.
Your bf seems like a real keeper, since he clearly did some research on the side to try to meet your fantasy! Love your blog btw.
Heās nothing short of incredible. Iām very lucky :)Ā
Glad youāre enjoying the blog! Iāll try to keep the content coming!
Conversations After Dark, III
Boy: Your butt is like a lunchavle.
Violet: You mean a lunchable?
Boy: Yeah.
Violet: *Why* is my butt like a lunchable?
Boy: I wanna stick my meat in it.
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Conversations After Dark, II
The Boy: You have a dimple on your butt.
Me: Yeah, I've always had it.
The Boy: I mean, I know. I stare at your butt a lot. How'd you get it?
Me: I dunno. It's always been there!
The Boy: ...
Me: ...
The Boy: Was it a tail?
Kink in Real Life
Over the past couple of weeks, the Boy and I have gradually been introducing more ... extreme play into the bedroom. As I may or may not have mentioned previously, he was entirely vanilla at the start of this relationship, and I was initially too shy to even ask him to tie me up (thanks, emotionally abusive, kink-shaming ex-boyfriend!).Ā
Several days before my birthday, we crossed a major milestone in our play: he fucked my ass, something I had been hesitant to ask him to do, but which I absolutely love. I had always assumed weād go through training for it first, but he just went for it. While I still want that vibrating butt plug (baby steps as the toy box gets built), it was so satisfying. It also opened up some more conversation about training and kink.
While I had mentioned the mind control/hypnosis kink months ago, it had been under (consensual) duress and I was pretty mortified when I actually said it out loud. Despite seeing and chatting with so many awesome people in hypnokink here on Tumblr, I was pretty terrified he was going to judge me hardcore as being weird (see above note re: abusive ex-boyfriend). While he was confused at first --- I had been giving him hints as to what it was, and he couldnāt identify it as aĀ āsci fi trope --- he was, in fact, pretty mellow. It was only about four months into our relationship, so it was something we tabled. He kept it in his back pocket.Ā
In the shower post ass fucking, he mentioned casually that he didnāt think the hypnosis/mind control thing was weird, and that to him, it seemed like a natural extension of the training/submission kink. He even more casually mentioned it was something we could play with.
For my birthday, additional toys were acquired: a Jimmyjane Form 2 (which I have wanted since I was 14; Iām 22 now) and a beautiful set of handmade suede wrist and ankle cuffs in purple (the color we settled on for kink things in the beginning --- it was less scary to him than black or red). That night, when he had be tied to the bed, fucking me, he leaned down and whispered that training was about to be taken to a whole new level.
While I had to wait several days thanks to the roadtrip from hell, that next level happened last night. He ordered me to watch the clock and started to drop me (I am pretty sure he was making the induction up as he went, which didnāt give me quite enough time to drop myself as deep as I like, but was an awesome and very very thoughtful start). He ordered me to rub my clit in time with the ticking of the clock and to associate that feeling that I got with the desire to serve and submit. Iām pretty sure I was already soaked at that. He clamped my nipples and fucked my mouth; I apologized when I came back up for being a drooling mess, but he said it was the best blowjob Iād ever given. Finally, he ordered me on top of him and dropped me further while he fucked my cunt. He brought me up and was awesome about aftercare (weirdly not something I usually need after hypnosis? But still very appreciated).
Heās ordered me to keep a journal for him of all my dirty thoughts and fantasies. Needless to say, heās going to get a lot more now.
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