Ryan Elyse Sheppard

Last night I think I drank too much Yeah, call it our temporary crutch

[sestragif]

This scene just breaks my heart. Her expressions say it all. 

[hyxlus]

madelinebrown‌:

She gave the other a nod, she could see by just the look on her face that everything that had happened and was happening, was weighing her down. But she hoped that soon her and Leo would be able to heal. Nothing would ever bring their parents back or change what her brother had turned into, but if they had each other, she thought they could both could begin to fix what was broken. “Anything I can help with?” she offered, if she accepted and she needed something from her, Madeline would drop everything to help. “There’s a plan to get Leo back, to turn his emotions on, but he’s going to need you after.” she figured that Ryan would already know that, it wasn’t just the fact that Dante had killed their parents that would take its toll, it would also be the guilt that would follow due to the amount of people he had killed for fun. 

She was quick to shake her head. She wasn’t dismissing the girl’s offer, she was actually grateful that she would ask without any prompt from Ryan. But in her self-destructive nature, Ryan would rather let things dwell and build up than accept any help and that always ended with her popping pills or crushing them up on her kitchen counter. “It’s mainly legal stuff.” She was on the phone with the family lawyer, scheduling will readings before she bumped into Maddie. She was relieved to hear Maddie had a plan but at the same time, she knew things weren’t going to go back to the way they were. Her brother was now a vampire and that image of him standing over their parents would never leave her sober mind. “Okay. Um...” she nodded her head but there was confliction in her mind. Part of her wanted to ask what the plan was but another part felt it best, for her sake and for Leo’s, if she didn’t know the details. “Just... Let me know when it happens.”

[halfwayriight]

Favorite lyrics from Post Traumatic :         ► [8/15] → Hold It Together

[hyxlus]

shawnmaddox‌:

“Shit, sorry.” Shawn repeated at the same time, immediately bending down to try and grab the device as well but when he realized the other was going for it, he backed off. Standing up straight again he brought his hand up to push his hood off his head so he could see a little more clearer, noticing it was Ryan. He felt like kicking himself right then, because Leo instantly came to his mind, what Maddie had told him. He wasn’t able to go and talk to her since he had been a little preoccupied with one friend almost dying and another one actually dying. They had an understanding of not talking about all the crap in their life but he couldn’t help but feel like this was too big to just gloss over. Instead of saying anything though, he just grabbed her arm, tugging her towards him so he could wrap his arms around her in an embrace.

When she straightened up, it was almost surprising to see Shawn. Her mind was so preoccupied with Leo and herself, it was like she forgot there was a world outside of her chaos. So she hadn’t really talked to Shawn since her parents' deaths — not that they talked about those kinds of things with each other — and part of her fault guilty for going radio silent on him. But before she could utter another word, she was pulled close to him and her arms immediately went to hug him as she felt his embrace. He didn’t need to say anything for her to know that he knew; just how much was still a question, but at the moment that wasn’t a concern for her. 

[hyxlus]

aberranttomas‌:

In his own bubble of self doubt and now guilt he hadn’t really been paying enough attention. He collided with another person and was quick to apologize. “That was my fault,” Tomas urged as he bent down to retrieve the phone too. “Is it broken? I’m sorry about that.” He had a lot to apologize for evidently, and he was adding this to the list of oops’s. 

“It’s fine,” she quickly said before she even looked at the phone. She lifted it in a way that wouldn’t let the other see the screen but the annoyed sigh she let out when she saw the cracked screen betrayed her. With all the stressors piling on to her, something as minor as a cracked phone was like the cherry on top. She didn’t bother to check if there was any internal damage to the phone, only pocketing it away. “It’s alright,” she reassured once more. 

[hyxlus]

madelinebrown‌:

She instantly took a step back the moment she collided with Ryan, she hadn’t exactly been looking for Leo’s sister but it was a number on her to-do list and with her brief glance down as she watched her pick up the device, she saw Leo’s name on her screen. “How’re you holding up?” she knew that whatever she said or did, wouldn’t ever take away the pain she was going through, but she still wanted to show her that she was there, to let her know she wasn’t alone. Madeline also wanted to tell her that she had a plan to try and bring Leo back, hoping that might help? Though in what way and whether it actually would? Remained uncertain in her head.

She straightened up to see the younger hunter and there was a slack in her shoulders as she pocketed her phone. “Um, I’ve been better, you know?” she said with an awkward side grin as she tried not to let the stress show on her face. But there was a reason she didn’t play poker, everything could be read on her face, no matter how hard she tried to hide it. “Just trying to deal with... normal, human things.” It worried her to think about what Leo was going through, even more so since they hadn’t been in contact. But she trusted Maddie to be the expert when it came to the supernatural, and so Ryan did what she told her to do or not to do. 

[hyxlus]

“Uh, yeah, I’ll be sure to tell him,” she stammered to the other person on the phone. The holiday season was over but for Ryan, it wasn’t a pleasant one. Between her parents' deaths and the whole situation with Leo, she felt like she was on the constant verge of a breakdown. The last time she had spoken to her brother was that Thanksgiving night when everything turned to shit and every attempt to contact him went unanswered. And now the lawyer was telling her they needed her brother present for the reading of the will which only added on to her stress. “Thanks,” she said as she hung up her phone, her finger hovering over Leo’s name. In that moment of distraction, she bumped into someone, dropping her phone in the process. “Shit, sorry,” she quickly exclaimed as she bent down to grab the device. 

[hyxlus]

shawnmaddox‌:

Drinking passed his usual amount, which was saying a lot for him, it wasn’t doing enough for him. Alcohol didn’t exactly bring him peace of mind to begin with, it had just become what he needed but now, it didn’t even numb him as it usually would. So he just drank more. He got into a fight at a bar like he was known to do, losing purposely, and he stumbled on his way home or tried to anyway. At some point he got too tired to continue on his way, sliding down against a building and falling asleep as he sat up against it. When he closed his eyes however, all the played was the image of Mateo dying over and over again causing him to twitch. And even though it was cold, having people wanting to bundle up, he was sweating in his sleep.

"Hey,” she said gently as she placed a hand on his arm. “Shawn?” She had gotten a call from the bartender after Shawn had left the bar. He had told her about the fight and how Shawn had been drinking himself to a near blackout before then. Considered for the man, he had called Ryan to check on him since the two of them frequented the bar together. It didn’t take long for her to find him, slumped up against the building. If it weren’t for the twitches she could only assume were shivers from the cold, she would have thought he was dead. 

[hyxlus]

madelinebrown‌:

Ryan was apparently fine, so that was a good start, right? At least she was hoping so, anyway. Though due to the time of night it was, that hope she had hold of was very rapidly slipping away. Her brows furrowed together, in small confusion at the mention of meeting at a diner, but she didn’t question it. “Yeah, I’ll be there soon.” ending the call, she turned back around, realising that she was still in her pyjamas, she quickly changed before rushing downstairs, making sure that she took her gun with her. Just in case. Sliding on her shoes she grabbed her brother’s car keys again and headed out of the door. 

~

Once she arrived on Main Street, parking outside of the building she didn’t even have to give it a second thought before she was already out of the car, walking into the diner. When she finally set eyes on where Ryan was, she couldn’t help but notice that Leo wasn’t with her— not that he would have been, considering she had been asked if she had seen him. But that wasn’t the point. “Hey,” she said as she sat down opposite Ryan in the booth, she could see that she wasn’t physically hurt for herself now, which provided some form of relief, even if it was just a little. “What’s happened?”

Her leg was bouncing out of nervousness as her hands clutched around a cup of coffee. It was almost one in the morning so there wasn’t a need for the java but the diner wouldn’t let her stay unless she ordered something. Her eyes stayed locked on the cup in front of her until Maddie sat down across from her. “Umm...” She wasn’t even sure what she saw, how was she supposed to tell Maddie what happened. “I went to my parents’ house and I ...” Her voice hitched as she tried to speak. “Leo was... was standing over them, over their dead bodies,” she finally got out as taking a deep breath, rushing the last part as she didn’t want to say it. 

[jerseyshoregifs]

[hyxlus]

@shawnmaddox

[hyxlus]

Aesthetic - Ryan + @shawnmaddox

“Well, I’ll make sure to take you with, then.” 

                                “Don’t say it if you don’t mean it, I’ll hold you to that kinda shit.”

[oilversqueen]

You thought I didn’t see you and you could sneakily approach me?

[hyxlus]

@shawnmaddox

[hyxlus]

madelinebrown‌:

That pause of silence before she started to talk again? That wasn’t settling. “No..” she answered, though she soon fell silent herself. She had tried contact Leo, a number of times, but she hadn’t had any luck. The only reason she stopped was because she couldn’t help but assume exactly where he had gone. Or, who had taken him. “No he hasn’t. Is something wrong?” she couldn’t help but feel like she already knew the answer as a strong hint of panic started to rise in her voice. “Are you okay?” now throwing the duvet off of her she got out of bed, “Is he? Where are you?” she was already walking out of her room, having all intentions of putting her shoes on and finding Ryan, just in case something had happened.

She let out a sigh of relief when Maddie said ‘no’ but at the same time, there was a worry in her about where Leo had ended up going to and if he was safe. “I’m fine,” she quickly reassured her. Despite the mental breakdown she had earlier, physically she was fine. “Um, there’s a diner on Main Street, it stays open pretty late. Can you meet me there?” She had just passed the city border but she didn’t feel like going home just yet. 

[hyxlus]

madelinebrown‌:

The sound of her ringtone didn’t wake her at first, it only forced her to roll over away from the noise. Though it wasn’t until she starting waking from her deep sleep, that she bolted upright, head snapping into the direction of her phone screen, seeing the name that was showing? Only puzzled her. She didn’t hesitate to answer, no, she quickly reached for it, answering the call. “Hey?” she sounded tired, clear confusion remained strong within her tone as she started to rub her eye with her free hand.

“Hey, Maddie,” she started, trying to hide the panic that was building up in her voice. “I know it’s late but...” There was a pause before she continued speaking. She wasn’t sure what to say or how to even bring up the topic. “Have you spoken to Leo? Or has he spoken to you?”

[hyxlus]

This was not how the evening was supposed to go. After being lead on a wild goose chase by Leo, she had returned to her parents only to see him there, standing above their two bodies. If the blood wasn’t a clear indicator, the veins around his eyes were. Before she could even say anything, he was gone and she was left with the bodies of her parents. There wasn’t anything she could do to save them but she also couldn’t leave them there. Calling the police, she explained how she just found them there like that and she had no idea who could have done that to them. Something she wasn’t ready to accept just yet was that Leo had killed them. It was an hour later that she was back on the road to Mystic Falls. The gravity of the situation really hit her on the drive back and after having a mental breakdown on the side of the highway, she realized that Maddie needed to know what was going on. Despite it being well past midnight, she still called the girl. @madelinebrown

[hyxlus]

shawnmaddox‌:

“You already did it once, maybe you’ll end up doin’ it again.” He was only teasing, since he understood fully well why anyone would want to get out of this town. He wouldn’t bad mouth it every second of the day because he stayed for good reason but anyone in this town would say it was best to get away and stay away if you have the option to. Still, it was nice having one person he could drown out his miserable life with. “You’re not going for the soft stuff are you?” He gestured to the bottle she grabbed. “We’re welcomin’ you back. Gotta go stronger than that and I’ve got a good one I’ve been waitin’ to crack open.”

“Well, I’ll make sure to take you with, then.” She wasn’t sure if she’d leave the town again. It took a while for her to feel normal again after everything that happened but even that, it wasn’t without some ‘medicated’ help. And if she was truly honest with herself, the only one that was really keeping her here was her brother. Her parents had already moved away but Leo was still in Mystic Falls and Ryan needed him more than anybody. “It’s for Thanksgiving,” she explained. “My mom wants me to bring them something, so...” She let her sentence hang, giving a shrug in ending. She bit her lip as if she was thinking about it before giving him a smile. “Okay. My place or yours?”

[hyxlus]

vindictivelogan‌:

“Lucky you,” Logan scoffed. “I wouldn’t put money on that staying true though.”

She took a small drag from her cigarette before asking him, “are you gonna put a target on me? Because it sounds like you are.”