I am Doing Better Than I Ever Was

[stillgotscars]

loml (loaf of my life)

[iamdoingbetterthanieverwas]

I sent a heat of the moment grovelling apology text to my mother

And now she’s typing…

😫😫😫

[iamdoingbetterthanieverwas]

I argued with my mother.

I was wrong to assume she was confused.

But then she started saying hurtful things that weren’t about what we were actually talking about.

I’m tired and I don’t know if I sleep on it if it will all feel better or if it won’t feel better.

She also wants to look after my baby for a day every week. I don’t want her anywhere near my baby. She’s too angry! She flips so quickly and says really hurtful things when she does.

[iamdoingbetterthanieverwas]

Once again wondering if I’d be better off single. He hasn’t done at full week at work since March. He also hasn’t helped in the house beyond doing dishes (once they have sat around all day) or about half the laundry.

He has no idea how much I’m doing or how much work from my actual job I have to do. He works 36 hours a week (except he hasn’t for weeks!) and during this pinch point I’m actually close to 72 hours or more the last 3 weeks. Which I realise now is literally double his hours. He doesn’t commute. Doesn’t make dinner. Doesn’t even think about dinner in advance of 7pm.

[iamdoingbetterthanieverwas]

Can’t post this on main but I literally just witnessed an Israeli I follow make the claim all Americans have the reading comprehension of 6th graders. Meanwhile, said poster eats propaganda 3x daily and defends genocide on here.

[iamdoingbetterthanieverwas]

I think my baby is a boy. It’s weird the boys are always my low key favourites at work, like when I think back to old classes I remember the “naughty” boys most fondly of all, but I can’t imagine having one in my house

[iamdoingbetterthanieverwas]

I know it’s insane but I swear to god I can feel this baby. Nothing definite but I feel like when I stand up it rolls about and my tummy feels weird.

[cheshire-cat-lenalee2]

[unclefather]

can’t risk it

[bentejam]

THIS PIECE OF PICTURE WORKS. 

[fakesurgery]

Gotta take all the chances…..

[fit-beach-tea]

Never risk it

[bbylilithian]

Too close to final’s week

[maggierobots]

I could use it.

[mythical-illustrator]

Why not, spread the luck

[dduane]

Could use some of that. Why not? :)

[iamdoingbetterthanieverwas]

Why are all people in all work places quite so impossible? Does anyone find colleagues easy?

[memeuplift]

[stuckinapril]

does anyone know if anything will ever be okay again

[iamdoingbetterthanieverwas]

I can’t get over how AWFUL I was over Christmas. My husband’s family will never forgive me.

[iamdoingbetterthanieverwas]

I actually have 2 LHs readings above 0.3 already this month 😭😭😭

I will loose my mind if I actually ovulate 😭😭😭

Please please please!!!!

[iamdoingbetterthanieverwas]

stress reading IVF statistics

[iamdoingbetterthanieverwas]

Stupid thoughts about stupid work during the holidays

[iamdoingbetterthanieverwas]

Also just found out friends are having twin girls in March.

[iamdoingbetterthanieverwas]

I’m hiding down the side of the bed wishing to be anywhere but here. I think I need to go away for a few days. I need to be allowed to feel what I feel and not be policed and forced to seem happy and make his life easy.