be the smut you want to see in the world ! horny on main who is at all surprised
masterlist!
⤡ andy, 19! she / they
⤡ i write: romantic, platonic, oneshots, imagines, open to series, SMUT, fluff, comfort, occasionally angst! send in a request and i'll do my best to expand
⤡ i DO NOT write: incest, blood/vomit! anything besides that is fair game
⤡ requests: open !!!
⤡ tags!
icarrianwrites - any and all writing
icarrianthinks - my random thoughts!!
marvel â´
dr. stephen strange, matt murdock, bucky barnes, loki laufeyson
the sandman â´
morpheus/dream
misc. â´
dr. robert chase, dr. gregory house (more tbd!)
this is an 18+ space so all ageless & empty blogs will be blocked
ââ .âŚ
a/n: i will get better at this so bear with me while i start writing again!!
- cherry wine is about domestic abuse. itâs now called a cute proposal song.
- too sweet is about seizing the day and ignoring healthy habits in favor of having more fun with unhealthy ones. heâs actively critical of himself in the song. itâs now called a song about thinking youâre superior for drinking black coffee.
- take me to church is about worship as a metaphor for sex. itâs called a religious song.
- eat your young is a song about war and political greed. itâs called a song about sex.
- now, the strongly political message of nobodyâs soldier is being ignored in favor of calling it a metaphor for hozierâs relationship with his fans.
when are we going to stop simplifying hozierâs music down to cute little cottagecore bogman forest music? maybe you dont want to hear this but i donât care. quit listening to hozier for the aesthetic. thereâs a reason why empire now, foreignerâs god, butchered tongue, etc. songs with unignorable political messages are among his least popular songs.
my thoughts on the afterlife of morpheus after finishing the sandman (that no one asked for + i am in denial):
orpheus isn't necessarily a constellation, but his lyre is. i'd like to think that somewhere in the cosmos, morpheus finally is able to rest after reuniting with his son, and orpheus plays his lyre for him - he says he has years worth of music to express now that he has a body back. it is quiet where they are, but their lives were filled with so much noise, that neither of them mind.
and if you really want to cry!! don't think about death leading him away from the dreaming, and essentially having a parental version of the "go, he waits for you" scene from the song of achilles.
anyway i'm beyond heartbroken but satisfied and i miss my man đ
hey tumblr just finished the sandman! devastated beyond all possible belief!! someone pls convince me he's not actually dead so i can stop crying (regularly scheduled smut & fluff to resume soon)
i love to think that he is a master at aftercare. snacks? water? back rubs? he is on it, whatever you want!! you let him inside of you, you should get to be pampered after. even if those requests sometimes lead to him getting riled up again.
B - Body Part (Favorite part of the body on their partner)
on you, probably your hands. how you can have him keening with just a brush of your hand. i also head canon that he looooves longish nails. like please dig into him and leave scratches down his back that he could get rid of but he chooses not to. don't worry - he'll return those markings in doubles.
your favorite part of him is probably his eyes or his voice. he could command a room with just a simple "enough". like who doesn't find that hot?? and his eyes, that looked like they swallowed galaxies, that would have you heading straight for your bedroom with a simple look in one direction. he's not stupid, he knows exactly what he does when he's holding eye contact with you and whispering things that aren't even considered dirty in your ear that have you pressing your thighs together.
C = Cum (Pretty self explanatory)
literally every morpheus writer has said this so i'm not discovering a new element or anything like that but he loves coming inside of you. half of it is because he's territorial and wants you dripping his cum when you walk next, and half of it is because he doesn't like to create messes (usually). however, i do think he could be persuaded to come on your face, if you ask very very nicely.
D = Dirty Secret (a dirty secret of theirs)
he would totally want to fuck you when you sleep. he's too afraid you'll be weirded out, so he doesn't say a word until you bring it up (which, you're with the lord of the dreaming, curiosity is going to get the best of you at some point). but after you do? he's doing it at least once a week. but he always surprises you so you never expect it. nothing makes him happier than biting at your neck while he thrusts into you and you sleepily moan. on a separate note - i think he would love to collar you and call you his pet... anyone else?
E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what theyâre doing?)
he isn't exactly experienced, but he's the lord of dreams and nightmares. he's seen every wet dream to exist - including yours. for him, it's like reading a map, and he doesn't fail to bring you to the destination of your orgasm over and over again until you are satisfied or passed out.
F = Favorite Position (This goes without saying)
he likes to be in control (wow, shocking!). i see him as being a big fan of missionary, but as your relationship develops, he grows to love the mating press. you just look so cute folded under him, nowhere to go, as he claims you <3.
G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)
he does. not. laugh. you would think he's performing some sort of sacrament. he is very serious, but he does let the occasional hum of amusement if something silly happens. but then he goes right back to rearranging your insides and the laughter dies in your mouth.
H = Hair (Does the carpet match the drapes?)
his bed head hair on his head is very well taken care of - he is a king, after all. he keeps it slightly untrimmed down there, but if you express an issue with it, he has no problem keeping it completely bare. he probably wouldn't let it grow unruly, though.
I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspectâŚ)
he is so locked in. during teasing, foreplay, the actual act itself? he's focused on you, completely. one time, he pretends to be uninterested and read his book as you grind on his thigh on his throne, but he gives in in about 2 minutes and bounces you on his cock himself. he loves to see you with a blissed out look on your face. he doesn't talk much during, but if he does, it'll be a small "divine" or "you are mine". it's mostly because he isn't used to people genuinely wanting him - if you press a small kiss to his jaw, he's more than satisfied.
J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)
if you're away for an extended period of time (like 4+ days) in the waking or away on business for the dreaming, that is the only time he will allow himself. it'll only be when he goes to bathe, though- he can't stand the thought of getting your shared bed dirty just because he couldn't contain himself. he replays his favorite memories of you - not just the dirty ones, although those are very, very fond. he thinks of your sweet smile, your skin in the sunlight, your arms wrapping around him. basically he's whipped for you.
K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)
rubbing my hands together mischievously writing this. not a kink but flips between hard and soft dom. loves when you talk back so he can punish you. dacryphilia + overstim is a big combo. you pressed to his chest, almost squirming away, as he forces you to cum over and over and thank him each time? um yeah!! also loves when you praise him, it's a big ego booster. this isn't the case all the time, but when he's in more of a hard dom mood, he loves some light degradation and titles. sir, your majesty, sire, my lord/my king all have him pulling your hair and slamming into you. dont forget ownership (aka marks all over your body and physically forcing you under him)!
L = Location (Favorite places to do the do)
he's a big fan of the bedroom and the throneroom. but the dreaming is him and he is the dreaming, so you two can really do it anywhere without fear of consequence. bathing together or out on one of the beaches/fields of the dreaming together are both possibilities where he'd want to take you. you have him wrapped around your finger though, so if you want it in the library or the ballroom... who is he to deny you?
M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)
he's lowkey easy. corny, but any sign of you being his or just being just. if you're just kissing and you murmur "i love you", he's ready to haul you off to the bedroom. you're wearing black to some event in the dreaming? bedroom! he sees you being a kind person to a child dreamer who maybe got lost and needed some comfort. let him breed you and see if you can make some of your own! he doesn't even need a reason, he could just use you as his own stress toy.
N = No (Something they wouldnât do, turn offs)
he wouldn't let himself be bound. he's still too traumatized for that to happen. in the theme of him being not too messy, he wouldn't like anything to do with vomit or piss. he's been around long enough to know those are turn offs for him. also, unless it's with clones of himself, he refuses to share you in any way. he finally has someone who loves him fully, he is not risking that.
O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)
he doesn't have a preference in giving or receiving, and is completely satisfied with both. i don't need to be the one to tell you that he is extremely skilled with his mouth. between the dirty words he will say and the lapping + length of his tongue, you're a goner. for him, he prefers to receive head in the dreaming. he might add an extra inch or two just to see you gag and watch your eyes tear as you struggle to fully take him.
P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)
most of the time, he's slow and sensual, gentle but you can feel every inch of him. he makes the time to run his hands across your body and face. he'll make sure that you know he values you. however, if he's missing you, feeling possessive or needs to put you in your place? you are getting bent over the closest object or pinned to the wall and having him absolutely wreck you as he growls into your ear. fast and rough and deep.
Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)
same as jacking off, he doesn't very often indulge in quickies. it usually takes you encouraging him or having you ask him for one directly. only then, he'll whisk the two of you to an unguarded part of the dreaming to fool around together. it is extremely rare that he gets desperate enough to ask you, but when it does (since you always say yes), he has an iron grip on your wrist as he leads you. he tends to be more... vocal, during those times.
R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)
for him, risk is relative. his realm quite literally shapes itself as his command, so there is no chance unless he allowed it. so it's really more the illusion of risk. but in the waking world? ... there is a small chance he can be tempted into a closet with you, after plenty of teasing of course. even then though, he can and probably will put some kind of barrier so no one actually finds the two of you.
S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they lastâŚ)
he is the personification of an concept, he is an endless. he could go for weeks without stopping, so it's really up to you. if nothing is more than elevated than usual, the two of you usually go for 4~ rounds. but on special occasions? that number went as high as 15!! you both look forward to breaking that record soon - especially him:
T = Toys (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On themselves or a partner?)
he doesn't have any toys or wish for any. any toy he uses would be something of his own creation. as soon as you started seeing him, he threw out any and all toys you had in the waking. he was an endless, what use of you did you have for toys when you had him? if you need toys to make you finish or just for fun, then he'll just magic one into existence. even better, since it's tied to him, he gets to feel the pleasure you feel. so everybody wins!!
U = Unfair (How much they like to tease)
jesus christ. he is the biggest tease ever. he has no problem whispering absolute filth into your ear and touching you subtly in front of anyone. you have to learn to match his energy very quickly, because otherwise, you'll need to master a diamond hard poker face since he'll this daily. the worst part? he will fully pretend that he doesn't do anything. "someone is needy" he'll smile against your lips, as if he didn't spend the whole day making you crazy.
V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)
he's pretty quiet. he doesn't speak very much. you'll get some noise though! usually an occasional pant or two, moan, or growl if he's feeling a certain type of way is your sign that you are doing more than a good job of pleasuring him.
W = Wild Card
after he finishes with aftercare, he does not let go of you for hours after. whether it be because he's afraid you will leave, or he just wants to feel your body on his, indulge him. he may be eons old, but truly, all he wants after intimacy is to be with the one he loves. he also doesn't do one-night stands. there needs to be emotional connection for him to be able to. aka a man who yearns is a man who earns!
X = X-Ray (A look down under!)
he can adjust himself as he wants to, so it could change practically every time. most of the time, it sits at 6 inches with a slight curve. but like i said in one of the previous headcanons, he'll add an extra inch or two when you guys fuck in the dreaming just to drive you insane and tell him how big it is.
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
all you need to do is look at him and he's ready! his drive only really stops when you're satisfied. so on particularly passionate nights (or days let's be real), he will go until you tap out or tell him to stop.
Z =  ZZZ (âŚhow quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
being endless, he doesn't need to sleep. but he'll hold you as you drift off in his arms, staring at your face or your back, thanking the fates and the creator above that he got so lucky as to be able to have you in this way đ¤
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a/n: hi awesome people thanks for reading and being freaked out!! i'm dodging vol. 2 spoilers left and right on here so trying to post without risking anything but i truly appreciate all of the love on the last two works!! <3 i didn't proof this so pls ignore any grammar and spelling errors
so glad that i didn't succumb to any spoilers because seeing him in that black tank with his muscles?? oh my GODDDDD i'm actually sick i had to put my phone down. that is going straight into the fic writing note. i cannot even describe the noises that left my mouth.
ie. you're dating morpheus and decide to celebrate his birthday (or as close to it as you can get). fluff!! allusions to smut at the end
there were people who were normal about their birthdays, and they were quite common. people who acknowledged the day, but didnât really go out of their way to do anything special. people who wanted a low-key, no-frills celebrationâif they wanted a celebration at all. and you could respect that.
unfortunately for your immortal lover, you were the exact opposite.
you really, really hadnât meant to pry. but when you entered the dreaming after just having come home from a friendâs birthday celebration, the thought came to you randomly.
"lucienne?" you asked while sitting and reading a book at a desk in the library. "do... do endless have birthdays?"
having gotten used to your curiosity about all aspects of the realm, lucienne responded, "as far as i know, no. they are the personification of ideas, so no one knows the exact date they came into existence. why do you ask?" her response was accompanied by a knowing smile.
"just... was unsure, is all," you answered, head sinking further into your book.
"completely unrelated, but do you know if tamaris is busy tonight? i... i have some questions."
đĄź.đ¤ŁđĽ§đĄź.đ¤ŁđĽ§
as you crossed off todayâs date, december 21st, you were stupidly proud of yourself. pulling this off was a feat in itself, but convincing dream that you werenât plotting something? that was the impressive part. from the time you questioned lucienne, you had had about a month to get everything ready. unfortunately, a lot of it had to go through matthewâwhom you bribed with your trail mixâwhile you kept dream... otherwise distracted in his room.
but tonight would be perfect. only the living room and the bedroom were decorated, so he could be surprised when he came in. and he would comeâyou were someone who fell asleep quickly. if you didnât show up in the dreaming an hour past your usual time, heâd poke his head into the waking world to check on you... which was loving. in a semi-stalker kind of way.
when he appeared to find you sitting on the floor of your bathroom, the lord of dreams was a bit perplexed. "are... are you alright, beloved?" he asked cautiously.
you smiled, standing up. "never better." then, fishing around in your pocket for a moment, you held out a black silk blindfold. "can i put this on you?" you asked excitedly.
he blinked, then chuckled. "as i recall, darling, this most typically goes on youâ"
you felt heat rise to your face and rushed to cover his hand with your mouth. "itâs not like that!! well i mean... it can be later, but not now. itâs not a trick, i promise. donât you trust me?"
he sighed, then leaned down so you could reach the back of his head. "whatever game it is that you are playing," he said against your neck as you tied it, "i suggest that you think very carefully about how you go about it."
you rolled your eyes. "youâre dramatic," you said as you took his hand. "come with me."
"you donât leave me much of a choice," he grumbled, as you seated him at the table in your kitchen.
you pinched his shoulder in response, then took his blindfold off.
when he opened his eyes, you were sitting next to him at the table.
"surprise," you said with a smile.
your small kitchen and living room had been decked out with black balloons, a few streamers, and small (fake) candles. in front of him sat a small cake, two empty glasses, and a bottle of white wine. the cake was chocolate, with blackberries and raspberries covering the top. poking out of it was a small toothpick with a scrap of paper that said âhappy birthday dreamâ in script.
he looked at you, expression fond if not a bit unreadable.
"i... i asked lucienne if endless had birthdays. she said that they didnât... so i thought iâd give you one," you said bashfully. "it... itâs because itâs the winter solstice today. i wanted it to have some meaning." you continued. he still wasnât speakingâwas that good or bad?
"you... you always care so much about me. about everyone in your family. i wanted you to know someone celebrated you."
he stayed silent for another moment, gazing at the cake, before he spoke. "no one has ever done something so... considerate for me," he said, voice so thick with emotion that it surprised even you. "...thank you for this, beloved. it... it is a most welcome surprise."
you smiled. "i didnât know what kind of cake you liked, so i asked tamaris. i canât promise that itâs as good as anything she makes, but i tried," you said, rubbing your neck awkwardly.
"you made this?" he asked. you nodded. "i... i thought it would mean more than just ordering one. did you want some?"
once you received a quiet "yes," you cut two slices and gave him a bite off your plate.
"thoughts?" you asked nervously. youâd cooked for him before, but baking for someone felt more intimate in a way.
"it is quite good," he said sincerely, lips pulling into his signature half-smile. "you put my kitchen masters to shame."
"now youâre just boosting my ego," you laughed. "oh!" the realization hit you. "one secondâI need to grab gifts." morpheus watched as you grabbed three cards off the table and handed them to him: one in a white envelope, one in a black envelope, and one in a green envelope.
"i assure you, i do not require gifts. you really did not have to go through all the trouble."
"thank matthewâheâs the one who went through all the trouble. i just gave him instructions, is all," you said as he began to open the black one.
it was from death, a simple grey card with an illustration of a cat saying have an un-furr-gettable day!
â¨"happy birthday, dream. love, death.â¨p.s. keep this one around. sheâs good for you."
the next was the white envelope, which held a yellow card with "happy birthday!" in glitter and red.
â¨"to the lord of dreams and nightmaresâhappy birthday. your friend, eternally, hob gadling."
these made him smile. how you even managed to get deathâs, he had no idea.
but he had one more card to openâyours.
inside the green envelope was a grey card. no graphic designs, no funny jokes. he opened it, and his heart almost contracted.
on the left side of the page, you had written a beautiful note:
â¨"happy (technically first) birthday, my love. you are my dream come true. i hope you know i celebrate you every day. you make me happy in a way i didnât even know was possible. thank you for being my best friend. to a million more memories and birthdays."
but it was what was on the right side that made him beam. taped to the card was a small polaroid photo. he recalled that you had taken it on your phone during the first outing the two of you had after he began courting you. he was half-hidden behind your head, only his blue eyes visible, while you smiled widely into the camera. you looked so happyâand so did he, shockingly.
"i wanted you to have something to look at when iâm not there," you said softly, pulling him out of his thoughts. "i was trying to think of what to get you, when i realized that youâre immortal. you can summon any object you desire. i figured... something with just the two of us would be special."
instead of responding, morpheus pulled you in for a deep kiss, which you very quickly returned. after all but attempting to remove your lips from your face, he rested his forehead against yours.
"it is funny," he spoke softly. "i, the one who shapes dreams, fail to shape a world for myself that you are not a part of."
you smiled. "i love you too, birthday boy," you said, kissing his cheek. "i hope you liked your day."
he leaned over to speak into your ear. "on the contrary... it is my birthday, as you say. and i do not think i am done celebrating yet," he said, voice laced with amusement.
your eyebrows creased in confusion. "did i miss something?" you asked. you had thought of every detail down to the tâyou couldnât imagine that youâd forgotten any part.
"you misunderstand me," he said, finger drawing a lazy circle on your thigh, though his expression looked like he could eat you whole. "i would like to continue the celebrationâprivately. in your room."
"well," you said as you grabbed his hand and stood, "who am i to deny you your wishes?"
he stood alongside you, and as he closed the door behind the both of you, you could almost swear he said something akin to "a very happy birthday, indeed."
but maybe you just imagined that.
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a/n: hey freaks i'm back!! hopefully you guys like this đ also 128 NOTES ON MY FIRST PIECE OF WRITING HOLY CRAP?? THANK YOU MWAH
ok so you've seen the "mortal partner who builds an altar to their immortal/godly partner"
i raise you - god/immortal who takes their partner's orgasms as an offering đ
also thank you so so much for 50+ notes on the morpheus imagine!! feel free to request something if you want a more thought out version of what's above :)
â°ââ¤ËËË morpheus with an inexperienced!reader
it's not like he had a shocking amount partners before you - but when you are eons old and the king of dreams and nightmares, you tend to pick up a thing or two.
in your eyes (and his, frankly), you might as well have been a virgin. the very limited times you had done anything was in university, with juvenile boys whose appetites were much larger than they were. the only times you ever finished was when you touched yourself, usually after they finished in under three minutes and left you to complete the task yourself.
morpheus was having none of that when you brought it up to him, after a make out session in his chambers of the dreaming quickly turned into something more... heated.
"i... i'm not great at this" you said shyly, in between him kissing your neck and caressing your hips. "i don't exactly know what to do."
"that is more than ok" he answered quickly. "if you are comfortable moving forward... i think i can assist."
he was slow, gentle, reverent. he could have just snapped his fingers and removed all of your clothing. but he didn't. slowly, piece by piece, he removed each article of clothing, kisses and words of affirmation accompanying each pull and tug.
"you are enchanting." he breathed out. you deserved so much more than what those idiotic boys - he dared not even call them men - could lacklausterly provide you with.
he started with his hands. caressing your face, he moved his hands down your chest, lightly touching your sides, before he slowly reached one hand between your thighs.
you sucked in a breath, and attempted to squeeze your eyes shut. but all he did was lean forward, and grasp your chin lightly. "look at me." he said. it wasn't exactly a command, but who were you to deny the stunning god who was making you feel so good?
his touch was deft. precise. in a matter of minutes, he had you writhing and panting under him. he did not speak much - he did not need to. the light sheen of your skin and your head thrown back was all the confirmation he needed.
"you're close" he said, matter-of-factly. you just nodded your head, mind too foggy to even establish real thoughts right now.
he smiled, almost cockily. like he had won a race that hadn't even finished yet. "ask politely."
normally, you would have said fuck off. but it felt so good and he was right here and you couldn't bring yourself to do it.
"please," you started as you clung the sheet below you as your back arched involuntarily. "please, let me cum"
he smirked. he would have preferred more begging, but you looked so sweet, and there would be plenty of time for that later.
"you may. cum for me, dearest." he leaned forward once again, and lightly bit the side of your neck, sharp teeth grazing soft, unblemished skin.
he works you through it. you cum unceremoniously, shaking as he pulls it from you. you are vaguely aware of the way you say (scream) his name, but by the time you catch your breath and he pulls you to his chest, you realize you don't exactly care.
"was that... adequate?" he asks, hand reaching for a towel that appeared out of nowhere to clean you with.
you almost laugh as you catch your breath. "are you kidding? that was... amazing." you said incredulously.
"good" he said as he moves the cloth across your body with care and practiced ease that you hadn't quite expected. "you deserve nothing less"
"although, i do have one question." you mused.
"which would be?"
"when do i get to have your cock?" you asked, half-teasing and half-embarrassed.
he shook his head, placing a kiss to the top of yours. "you are the most insatiable creature."
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a/n: andy writes again who cheered!! lowkey this is ass and i got impatient towards the end but we're working on it
as someone who's been a hozier fan since 2015 hozier's "don't propose during cherry wine" visuals are so fucking vindicating you don't even KNOW. like i've been fighting in the "don't romanticize cherry wine" trenches for YEARS and now i turn to see my fellow soldier is hozier himself
just saw hozier live and he thanked everyone for using their hard earned money to come see him and support him. yeah you would never find taylor having that sentiment.
for reference my ticket was 80 dollars.
the cheapest ticket i found for taylorâs upcoming show was 549 dollars. (i compared multiple third party sellers)
and i havenât even mentioned how all art is political. and how hozier chooses to uplift ceasefires. he encouraged us to contact our u.s. representatives. how is opener (a black queer person) thanked hozier for creating a world where itâs safe for her.
what they donât tell you about uncluttering your countertops/tables/general spaces is youâll think itâs dumb as hell & allow it to all pile up because the idea of organizing and removing shit is daunting but once you do it and step back and See how things look without clutter you will feel as though you just snorted a line.
