Ello there!
My art will be under the tag #dromscribbles
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@icedromeda
Ello there!
My art will be under the tag #dromscribbles
Gif by wifheur
OCs being drawn again wowie
"tell me one bad thing about your childhood" uhm i dont remember. "okay what about a good thing?" i.. dont remember either sorryyyy
You know what the worst part of having a dissociative disorder is, for me personally?
The emotional amnesia.
Your entire life feels like something that you watched on TV, rather than something that you actually lived through.
You know that some of the most horrific things imaginable have happened to you, and you feel nothing about it. Sure, the memories disgust you on principle, but you don’t feel anything.
It makes you question if anything that you remember is real. If that actually happened, shouldn’t it feel significant? Shouldn’t you be sad, angry, hurt, something?
And to top it all off, nobody understands. Not even yourself.
Handmade Polymer Clay Sea Slug miniature (⊙ヮ⊙)
I’ve yet to see a bloodymary fic where Simon hears that Grace was in a coma and then immediately goes. “Oh no this poor researcher has no idea about the Quiet Rapture because it happened while he was asleep.” Then Rocky mentions how he’s been gone from his planet for decades and internally Simons inner monologue is…
Oh No these incredibly kind people have no idea that there isn’t a planet to get back too. We are stuck in a research vessel with dwindling resources, no allies, and I have no idea how these two will react to realizing how fucked we are but I’ve already pack bonded and now I need to keep all of us alive.”
it’s soso cool how mental health meds can lower your heat tolerance severely and make you sweat buckets. Love this feature
every moment of being alive is like this
The reason I never leave the house during summer unless necessary fr
lukarin crack
suzuka gp or smth
Something about Sopro, and the Solo MVs, and Not Okay having the same colour scheme as the GH5 concept trailer as if they want our attention back on it...
Ok this is probably gonna be rambling as hell and probably mostly/entirely grasping at straws/tinfoil hat theories, but it’s been rotating in my brain for days like a rotisserie chicken and I feel like it’s overheating now so I have to get it out in some form before it sets on fire. Maybe if anyone else more eloquent than me sees anything sane in this lunacy then feel free to add to it lol. Sorry folks, this is a long one but walk with me...
Something about the traumas/trauma responses depicted in the Not Okay MV (which has the same colour scheme of black and red as the GH5 concept trailer (in which the girls are fighting and are very much not okay)) and the solo MVs and Sopro’s influence, and Wooyoung’s wish to make everyone happy again.....
Hongjoong is trapped by his phone, something about the hellscape of social media and the harmful effects of phone addiction and online comparison and dissociative doomscrolling and fear of getting cancelled and having to be 'perfect' all the time. Maybe even tormented by the fact the happy fun image he has to portray online isn't true to himself but is what people expect of him?? Something then about his solo song being about being Number 1, ie the best, ie he doesn’t have to worry anymore about comparing himself or being perfect or reading every review or comment - he’s No.1 and already perfect and everyone loves him. He's got the girls feeling holy lol. Sopro fixed it, he’s “happy”, you’re welcome.
Seonghwa being trapped and controlled by task lists, being filmed and watched, people controlling his time, societal expectations, having to obey and constantly work, deeply aware of time ticking away and feeling unable to get everything done, vs in Skin being free to express himself and be himself and make his own choices and examine his own feelings and ideas, free from the limitations of societal expectations (be they about beauty, gender, or time/productivity). Sopro fixed it, now he’s happy...?
Something too about this same/similar "scream" pose in both videos, and the red light/distortion......
Yunho…. Hmm. Yunho was haunted by his brother’s ghost but also by multiple versions of himself? He’s feeling isolated, alone and traumatised, haunted by his brother’s ghost, doesn’t know who the hell he even is himself, feels pulled in a thousand directions. So he seeks out connection, any connection, just to feel something. Something about Slide to me no need for words and the entire depressed/bored/numb casual hook ups vibe of that MV…. Sopro went oh you're searching for someone, you want connection, ok here you go... but it doesn’t ring true for him because maybe Yunho is aware of something the others aren’t?? As previously discussed by @eehijal is he possessed and/or is he aware of the surveillance? (also discussed by @thirstkanaphan here) Or lol did Sopro try to make him happy again by reuniting him with his brother except lol oopsie it’s his brother’s spirit in his body lmao tinfoil hat time
Yeosang is trapped by the expectations of his parents right? Feels like a bird trapped in a cage, crying, wishing he could fly, deeply aware of time ticking away but for a different reason than Seonghwa - he's aware how much time is passing him by while he's trapped, how much time is being wasted when he could be free. Something then about his solo song being about what will HIS legacy be (he doesn’t want to be like (or parent like) his parents perhaps?), breaking out of the cage - literally shedding layers - and screaming about what HE wants, not what they want. Forging his own legacy. One more step, let it all out louder… What are you waiting for? Scream with all your might, loud loud loud
San is an interesting one and probably another absolute stretch lol. In Not Okay he’s running from people who are capturing him (arresting him?). Constantly running away from authority (and/or being hunted down/hounded for doing something deemed ‘wrong’?) could make him feel like the Bad Guy (I stfg if Bad is about him…) so… Sopro fixes it by freeing him of that guilt?? Somewhat?? Like there’s such a cognitive dissonance in saying “I feel like a creep” but then saying how much you love the feeling of being with whoever he’s singing about (*cough* Wooyoung *cough*) that he’s almost become accepting of being seen as bad/a creep? Like he doesn’t care what people think anymore because he loves it/them? I dunno. Maybe also something about him being the one who sacrifices himself for others (leads the guards away and gets caught so others can escape...?), still doing that but here in a way that actually makes him feel good too (lolll the service top of it all) by getting to indulge and make his partner feel good? I'll give you everything you need and want, every touch a special detail... you're what matters all day 'n' night
Mingi is either rejected OR pushes people away, either way he doesn’t get close to people, hence the crowd in Not Okay are facing away from him, not listening or looking at him. So then in Roar he gets to fucking RAVE with a crowd who does love and accept him, he’s no longer alone on stage, everyone wants to touch him (lol), he’s now so popular he’s confident enough to address the haters and the copycats directly. Maybe, to project one of my own coping mechanisms for a second because it's also a very common one, doing the classic "they can't reject me because I reject them" thing, bad-mouthing & laughing at the people who rejected him? (Oh the neurodivergent tropes of it all, being rejected by people no matter how hard you try, feeling unheard and unseen, so you stop trying and start pushing them away to avoid the pain, but then you find your own people who DO get you and it's amazing)
Wooyoung had stage fright? He looks vulnerable and scared on stage, the crowd angrily demanding everything from him, perhaps he's also uncomfortable being so closely watched and observed and judged as well as demanded of. So what does Sopro do? Put him on a huge ass stage, the star (get it) of his own show, in control, with confidence in buckets, singing about how his sadness/doubt is gone and replaced with light (Sopro's light...?). Every night he'll be our sign, aiming his arrow, steady and sure of himself. And like the lyrics just spell it out (translation from Genius):
The truth I've been keeping in silence in the dark, the night of my sky I've been hiding without an end, The world with no such thing as light, The galaxy that has lost its brightness, Now your light is making changes in ways I never imagined. Now, I'm shedding light on you
He was a star hiding his light because of stage fright/fear of being perceived/judged, but thanks to Sopro’s light, now he can shine light on everyone else (and 'help' them feel better too 👀)
And Jongho being taunted/haunted by his injury, being unable to run and play sports, his lost dream, his fear of re-injury, being overwhelmed and tormented by his own mind and thought spirals (depicted externally on the tv screens). To Be Your Light (something something be the light oh Halazia, Sopro’s light…) then talks about running to someone, and something about doing the things he misses doing, dreams coming true, old things we thought impossible becoming possible again (depending on which translation you go off but that's the basic idea it seems)
TLDR: Was Sopro trying to make everyone happy in the IYF solo songs by “fixing” their traumas??? And is it now backfiring massively because they're starting to realise it’s hollow and not real etc? 👀
**Update to thoughts on San in the reblogs!**
+ Additional Seonghwa thoughts here
Are you looking for something to do today? An atiny just uploaded a 443-slide ATEEZ LORE powerpoint that includes the mvs, diaries, and relevant media.
If you are looking to catch up with the lore ahead of the cb, this might be your chance!
The Colors Mean Things
In the concept trailer for Golden Hour: Part.5, all of us noticed the nearly monochromatic palette, with most of the members dressed in black against a white background. The only color is red, and it's used sparingly:
There's a significance to the color red in the lore, and I'll explore its meanings and possible interpretations.
The dominant theory is that the members in this clip are under the possession or influence of Sopro, showing us the consequences of Wooyoung's impulsive wish:
Wooyoung, returning quietly to the villa where the members slept, headed to the living room. He passed a table covered with empty bottles and leftovers, went to the antique cabinet, and picked up Sopro. Wooyoung: “So if I use this… I can sync my and my members’ emotions?” Sopro’s red light wavered as though in response to Wooyoung’s question. Holding the stone tightly in his fist, Wooyoung brought his hand to his heart and earnestly prayed: “It’s as though they’ve all forgotten what it was like to be happy. Reignite our passion like it was back then, and let us be happy together again. Please.” Red light spilled from the gaps in his fingers, a ruby aurora dancing throughout the dark room.
Most of us associate the color red with lore!Wooyoung, as he's been instrumental to the chaos wrought by Sopro, and is even perhaps responsible for destruction and deception on a much larger scale.
But I'd argue the colors are also telling us to pay attention to Yunho.
Because there's something going on with Yunho.
In Adrenaline, Yunho (not our Yunho, not World A's Yunho, a different world's Yunho) faces off against his members. Bathed in red light.
This isn't the first time we've seen him isolated from the rest of the group during Golden Hour. Recall in Lemon Drop, towards the end, in a series of quick-cuts, we see Yunho physically separated from the members.
In the end credits, Yunho reappears alone, opening the trunk of a car to find the uniforms worn by Halateez.
Is he possessed? Has he turned against his friends? Is he a danger? The use of red might suggest such a thing.
But remember: "Question yourselves"
Yes, Red is the color of surveillance...
..but red is also the color of defiance, of deviance, of non-conformity. In the narrative of the Towards The Light concert, Yunho is exposed by the red light of the panopticon.
Red marks you as other. From the perspective of a militarized government hellbent on stripping the emotions and color from its population (creating a world of black and white) red is the enemy.
I would argue there's another and related meaning of the color red in the lore: awareness. You might even call it sentience.
Recall how Sopro, in its inert, objective state, is depicted as colorless. This can be seen in the Illusion and Dreamers mvs.
But then, it wakes up.
I am alive. If anyone were to ask why, I honestly could not answer. For as long as I can remember, I have always been alive. I was not brought into existence by my own will. I had lived without thought until one day, I suddenly became aware - aware of the fact that I had been born. But then, where did I come from? Who am I? What am I?
From then on, the color changed. Sopro is now exclusively depicted as red.
the outlier is Crazy Form, but, depending on which theories you subscribe to, the events shown in the mv may not actually be what happened. In which case the color makes all the more sense.
If red is the color of awareness, then the singling out of Yunho in red could mean that Yunho is aware, that he's broken free of whatever hold was supressing his thoughts and emotions
Perhaps we got a picture of what that process looked like in the Adrenaline mv, with Yunho convulsing, as if his system is rebooting Notice how this moment takes place next to a giant glowing red cube.
The point of showing us a third world (World E) in the Adrenaline mv could have been to draw our attention to a Yunho who has gained awareness, and to teach us to watch carefully when it happens in other worlds. This suggests the variants of each member have a shared fate, that in every life Hongjoong is the caption, or that Wooyoung's choices will spiral out of control, or that Yunho wakes up first.
But when does he wake up?
I'd argue he's been awake for a while. For one thing, he knows he's being watched.
And he wants us to know it too. In the concept trailer, the members evade our gaze. Their eyes slip away, off to the side, whenever the camera focuses on them. Except for Yunho. He's the first to look at us directly.
When we enter the club of In Your Fantasy, he's the first person you encounter, and he lets you in. Same with Ice On My Teeth, Yunho's frank regard in the opening shot suggests an intentional pattern.
How did he wake up?
I don't think it's unimportant that Yunho's incarnations throughout the lore are associated with death in some way. This has been extensively examined by my fellow meta/lore writers. But death is not always death. It could mean change, transformation, and transition. A passing of one state (objective) to another (subjective). Perhaps Yunho dies to wake.
I also don't think it's a coincidence that the styling for the concept trailer looked so similar to the concept art of Not Okay, which depicts attempts by World Z to assert control over the members by altering their minds (perhaps that music video will end up being the most relevant piece of lore to inform where we're headed to in Golden Hour).
A similar color scheme is used in the styling and cinematography of In Your Fantasy. For me, the red accents of their outfits indicates a semi-awareness, a struggle against control and freedom. In the club of In Your Fantasy, where everyone is watching, we see efforts at rebellion. Yunho may already be awake, but Hongjoong's actions suggest Sopro's influence over him is breaking too.
This makes him a target.
The way Hongjoong and Yunho are together in the frame implies an affinity.
Even more interesting the way they interact with each other, and how the color red plays a role. Because in the group setting, Yunho is wearing a black coat, obscuring most of the red outfit he's wearing underneath. But then, as Hongjoong looks up at Yunho, the camera (or Hongjoong's mind) cuts to red!Yunho, essentially the manifestation of awareness. Its effect on Hongjoong is immediate: he doubles over in pain. Sentience hurts.
I was also intrigued by the conflict between Yunho and Mingi presented in the trailer. Could it be that Yunho's attempts to wake up the others is being met with resistance, just as it did in World E?
Perhaps Yunho tried at least once before, dangling the key in Mingi's face and daring him to take it - to pursue it. What might that key represent, given its recurrence throughout the lore? When that method didn't work, perhaps Yunho had to take a more confrontational track, triggering a hostile response.
Notice how Hongjoong is framed in the middle, as if caught between the effects of Sopro and his efforts to wake up.
I am probably barely scratching the surface of the use of red in the extensive discography and videography. But it's worth pointing out patterns, and thinking about how the colors are guiding us to the answers we week.
"I'm bad," Yunho spoiled for us earlier today. Question even that. It's all upside down.
This is still the hottest thing Kim Hongjoong has ever done [ x | x ]
@pirate-queen-aurora
These colours look familiar *shrieks* also what's on the background?
"this is my pride"
The rest of the band appears.
Thinking about DJANGO's lyrics talking about a chess game, and Yunho calling himself the lone gunman....
Hmmm....
DAMN Ad so targeted I thought it was a normal post on my dash wth
Since when did Idolmaster collab with random puzzle games????