A June without you is bland

oozey mess

#extradirty
Jules of Nature
occasionally subtle
wallacepolsom
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
Cosmic Funnies
hello vonnie

pixel skylines
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

Kaledo Art
RMH
Sade Olutola
$LAYYYTER
cherry valley forever

祝日 / Permanent Vacation
Today's Document
KIROKAZE
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
Not today Justin

seen from Sweden
seen from United States
seen from Türkiye
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from T1
seen from United States

seen from France

seen from Singapore

seen from Australia
seen from United Kingdom

seen from United States

seen from United Kingdom

seen from Germany
seen from Australia
seen from Sri Lanka
seen from United States

seen from United Kingdom

seen from China
@icyspikes
A June without you is bland
我说了
我就不想你
但是今天
我一直在等你
我还等你
We are all Trying Here - Ep 1 and 2
The first impression of Hwang Dong Man, was that he is really annoying. All of his reactions seemed very childish. He seemed to be wanting attention and doesn’t seem to care about what other people feel. He was extremely bitter, and felt that it was unfair that despite working hard for 20 years he hasn’t made it. All the people around him have made it and are successful. I think in some ways he was playing a victim. He was constantly infringing upon the boundaries of the people. I think one of the interesting aspects was the portrayal of jealousy and bitterness at other people’s success. Usually a protagonist doesn’t express such emotions. Hwang Dong man externalized his need to be seen and validated, in a way that is almost child like. He doesn’t feel like he exists if hes not seen by other people. When he watches other people’s movies, he criticises them. He says movies are like life massages, meant to be seen for people to relax and feel good. Contridictorily enough his own script lacks that feeling. Eun-A criticisised that the protagonist of the script doesn’t have the usual power of a protagonist- which is to come out shining in any situation. The reason for this being that the writer himself doesn’t have it in him hence it doesnt come through in the protagonist. Again and another criticism hwang dong man has for Park gyeong se movie is that it doesn’t suit him, that he's writing about something that he has no personal experience in. But Hwang Dong Man does the same thing with his script.
He realistically potrays the contradictory and inconsistent self that humans can be. A oxymoron. I also found him to be unrealistic, because of his persistence. Someone who kept with his art for 20 years even after constant failures. For some people this may be realistic, because maybe thats all they know to do. Without their dream they are nothing. To me the characteristic of persistence is very protoagonist like. I like that they portrayed how ugly persistence can get. Its not romanticising hard work and persistence and then finally someone makes it. It shows how being stuck with the one thing can impact the self and relation with others. He potrays despair.
His friends from the eight club are not wrong for not wanting his presence. They have known him for a long time and he has exhausted them with his behaviour. They themselves have their own difficulties and their own lives, it would be unfair to expect them to keep putting up with him. I think that distance will help both the parties involved.
I think the reason Eun A is able to show sympathy to him is because she hasn’t been in his life continually as his other friends have. I believe she also has her own problems and possibly finds certain aspects of Hwang Dong Man relatable. She has the bandwidth to have deeper conversations with him. Sometimes the people who were always there for you, may not be able to be there for you in the same way or in the way that you expect them to be. This is because everyone is changing and the situation around them is changing. It would be unfair to expect the same kind of comfort that you possibly received previously. I think there might be a sense of disappointment in that realization and maybe hurt but it is what it is.
Forgiveness
I kept looking within
Examining all the puddles
Of dirty water
They were innumerable
I thought about tomorrow
Felt my chest tightening
I found escape
The beautiful fairy tales
They drew me in
From night till dawn
Regret sweeps in at noon
I live through the fog
And wonder all day
These shackles
Knotted across my chest
How can I cut them free
I kept pondering
Day after Day
The sun rises
And sets
Earth moves on
Nothing waits
For inner turmoils
Even when I see clearly
Nothing changes
The patterns repeat
I chased it relentlessly
The freedom
It disappeared
Like a wisp of smoke
Just as I grasped it
Then I understood
It's true nature
And even if nothing changed
I looked at the dirty puddles
Embraced them in my warmth
And I left them as they were
They still remain
For now my warmth lingers
The Ocean
Grace sat staring into the blue ocean. The sea seemed calm and still from afar. Closer to the beach, the waves chased each other, bubbling into white foam. Exactly ten years ago she remembered sitting there defeated but with hope. She told Rain that there were so many things that she wanted to do. Even through the fog, the new beginnings were within her reach. Now they seemed so far away. She felt that walking into the blue ocean, letting the waves wrap around her, would be the most serene that she would ever feel.
She felt someone tap her shoulder. She looked behind to find a woman peering at her. The woman's eyes lit up as she said “It's been such a long time since I saw you”. She stared blankly at the woman “I'm sorry. Have we met before?”. The woman sat down next to her “It's me. Claire.” Grace looked at the women next to her but still couldn't place her. “I'm sorry. I think you have the wrong person”. Claire tilted her head “No I know you. I would recognise you anywhere”. You… forgot all about me didn't you”? Grace shook her head “You definitely have the wrong person”.
Silence filled the air as Grace and Claire looked at each other without blinking. The only sound was of the waves crashing into the shore. Grace took a deep breath and looked away first. Claire spoke softly “What are you doing here all alone staring into the ocean?” Grace replied “I don't know you. Leave”. Claire said “I won't make a sound. I'll just be next to you”. Grace was too exhausted to muster a reply. She thought that Claire didn't look harmful. As long as she didn't disturb her, it wouldn't matter. Claire sat with her in silence till the sun touched the ocean turning the blue into pinkish-orange.
The sky slowly turned dark and one could no longer make out the ocean, except for faint lights from ships. Grace lay on her back, looking up at the sky. Claire mirrored her. For some reason Grace felt deeply comforted by Claire’s presence. She didn't feel the need to fill the space with words. The lapping of the water and the change of the landscape before her eyes made every muscle in her body relax. Grace turned towards Claire and asked “How long do you plan to stay here?”. Claire closed her eyes and replied “As long as you want”. Grace also closed her eyes “It feels really heavy. Every single day has been filled with the same fog”. The giggles of children could be heard in the background. A faint breeze tickled their bare feet. Grace continued “There is no difference between yesterday and today and tomorrow is going to be the same as well. The ocean looks so welcoming. All I have to do is step in”. Silence fell again and the air got colder. Grace suddenly felt that the heaviness in the air dispelled. She breathed in the salty air.
Claire's voice rang out “I know. I feel exactly the same. I came to keep you company. I know no matter how beautiful and serene the ocean looks, you won't walk into it. You didn't 15 years ago and you won't now either”. Grace, with her eyes still closed, said “I'm a mess though. I want to be free, free in a way that I'm not remembered by anyone”. Claire said, “Stay here for as long as you need. You know when the time comes you'll go back, even if it's all meaningless”. Grace opened her eyes and turned to look at Claire, but there was no one beside her. She could still feel the warmth from Claire. Grace blinked, dazed. She was going to ask Claire, how did she know about her so well. Grace sighed and thought that maybe she'll meet her again somewhere else some other time. Claire seemed to know where to find her
Wonderland
Leaves sway
In the warm summer breeze
Air heavy, sultry and sweet
Bees buzz around the night queen
An orange ball suspended across
Light blue sky and pink clouds
Peacocks call out from mountain tops
It's a perfect day
To immerse inside
A world of fantasy
The lines woven together with words
More alluring than the landscape
It could have been a perfect day
The shrill of the telephone
Cut through the croaking of frogs
Rancid acid bubbling from within
The eyes blind to the beauty
The mind too frantic
To build the world
Spread across the pages
Will there be a time
When I'll get my world back
Was it just an illusion
I can never go back to
Stolen moments
Rare to find
Harder to keep
I miss the wonderland
不想
你存在
只我内里
所以你走
对我来
没有什么影响
但不知道
为何感觉
有一点儿
心疼
你就是
一陌人
没有你
我的日常
根本就不变
但不知道
为何感觉
这么多的距离
明明你住
在我脑里
现在我很傻
明天
我不会再想你
天地大
没有什么是静止的
所以我以为
我根本就不想你
家就是温柔
但是有时冷
有一次
我觉得太负担
我就不配
那么多的爱和关心
我感觉很孤单
以为我的心
根本就没办法抵达他们
我的好意
根本就没办法抵达他们
我的想法
没有什么位置
我是不是被宠坏了
I told myself
Lets take it slow
There is still time
When he comes back
I'll be different
I'll be at a better place
I bought
A pretty little notebook
Wanting to jot down
My everyday
In his absence
Preparing for his departure
Passed by him twice after
And suddenly
The day has come
When he leaves
I'm still at the same place
I twist and turn
At night
Terrified
I'll be exactly the same
In a blink of the eye
He'll be back
And I'll still be exactly
The same
No more sunday evenings to look forward to
Home
I had forgotten
That feeling
Pressing over my chest
My every day
Had me breaking out in sweat
That I had forgotten
There is no place
Where I'm at ease
No break
That regains my strength
Home
I'll never feel
Home away from home
Home
Time
I'm envious of you
Who wants the time to freeze
In a place that's special
Soft waves of our voices
Reaching you
I know though
That your sparking light
Is held
By blood sweat and tears
I'm envious of you
Who has a place
That feels home
But I know
You made that space
Filled it
I know though
Behind the doors
I'll find the remnants
Of darkness
I'm envious of you
Who wants the time to wait
To be wrapped in music
And words
I know though
That what fills you
Makes you empty
And so you hold on
I'm envious of you
Who is anxious
Of the ticking clock
I'm envious of you
Who likes it here
The Now
That's all a mess