+ L - I - T - P +

+ L O V E . I N . T H E . P I N E S +

[everythingissomewhatrepaired]

Here is a comic about missing parts. Thanks as ever to the wonderful angels who support the comic. You can join them on here : linktr.ee/judymoore

— — —

Everything is somewhat repaired: Missing PartsCW: Genital Surgery Directly after the orchiectomy operation most of the pain, not so much, was under my tummy where the incisions were made. Between my legs, not much at all. (alt: Under belly with scars. a circle of sky with white clouds covering genitals)

Rolling over in my sleep, I had always been a little carful not to squash those vulnerable parts between my thighs. But this first sleep, a little high on pain meds, I was still careful but found there was nothing to squash. (alt: Judy sleeping in a hospital bed)

Rebecca arrived with pink roses and a sandwich. We talked about the missing parts. She asked “Is it like losing a tooth? Your tongue busy checking for it, writing a new map of your mouth.”(alt: Fruit bat Rebecca wearing a leather jacket, with a speech bubble containing a tooth.)

I said it felt more like being at a party, and realising some of the people you came with aren’t there. You hear they left hours ago and you hadn’t noticed until now. You were busy dancing…. or dreaming? (alt: Someone whispering into Judy’s ear as she looks off confused.)

You feel a little pang of guilt for not saying goodbye properly but then realise quite how much you weren’t ever really friends. And you continue dancing. And then someone brings you roses. (alt: Judy dancing wearing a sleeveless t shirt with Elizabeth Taylor written on it. surrounded by pink roses.)

[everythingissomewhatrepaired]

Here is a comic about a song. Thanks as ever to the angels who support the comic. You can also support over at p a t r e o n, you can hear the song on my b a n d c a m p. >>> linktr dot ee slash judymoore — - – – -  - - Everything is Somewhat Repaired: You ever write yourself a love song? cw: life drama In 2020 I wrote a song called “Being quietly gay because these rocks are witch-finders under a sleeping hex” (a selection of rocks marked with various symbols)

It was on an EP called “Judy is working really hard to make this happen but sometimes needs a nap and that’s ok.” The  drawing is of the Courage medal that the cowardly lion is given at the end of The Wizard of Oz. (record cover)

The music was made while I was falling asleep. I would keep my midi controller in my bed and would press pads as I was drifting off. I’d wake up in the morning and find out what shreds of music were there. (midi controller with various pads and buttons. the little screen has a rabbit, a bear and an angel.)

The vocal is gentle and repetitive with an uneven tempo. In second person it reassures a waking amnesiac that things will be ok, they are loved, they already have a plan, and someone to help them. (a copy of a drawing of a sleeping woman by Rembrandt.)

You might have noticed that I’ve been posting fewer comics recently. The past months have been kind of dramatic ( a tattered scroll with this list: - I broke up my 9 year relationship - leading to big social repercussions - I got a prestigious grant to make comics - I had major surgery - with recurring complications and infections - I drastically changed my established hormone routine - I had a long awaited visa appointment - got permanent residency in Germany - trans people are still at the sharp edge of rising fascism - Countless other bullshit - My Mum visited… that was nice <3 )

today I heard that song again and felt my past self telling me we’re going to do this and she has my back. And like the cowardly lion’s courage medal, it feels like a sweet nothing that permits me the strength to do everything. (alt: the Cowardly lion from the wizard of Oz, wearing a broken chimney pot as a crown)

[everythingissomewhatrepaired]

Here is a comic about trying to deal with the news of the last weeks. Thanks as ever to the angels who support the comic and my other projects. You can do it too: linktr.ee/judymoore - - - - - Everything is Somewhat repaired: Dear trans siblings. cw:??? The world is extra fucking cruel right now. Our humanity is being strategically denied in order that a failing political agenda can try and cling to power. (alt: a scratchy overlapping and disjointed drawing of the New York Times logo) We’re seeing this manifest in the most brutal ways (alt: A lily) and we’re living it in our day to day. (alt: A lit candle) Last year I was out recording city sounds with my music group. In an echoing tunnel under a bridge at museum island this was written over and over on the walls: (alt: A square with uneven surface with marker written “Trans Happiness is Real” and a trans symbol) I like to think about a small group of scrappy trans kids who wrote this. I imagine them laughing and shrieking, ecstatic to be together and defiantly alive. (alt: View of the entrance from inside the tunnel, three silhouette figures, one crouched writing  on the wall, two embracing, a full moon in the sky.) Please don’t despair. (alt: black text on small white patch in a black panel.)

[everythingissomewhatrepaired]

Here is a comic about timing. Thanks as ever to the angels who support the comic. If you want to join them, there are directors commentary on all the comics, pre-release on basically everything I make, and the warm feeling of knowing your money is paying for my hormones and stuff. https://www.patreon.com/tomorjudy - - - - Everything is somewhat repaired: Cosmic timing CW: healthcare admin My operation was scheduled for December 15th with 3-5 days in hospital afterwards. I would be out and mostly recovered in time for the holidays. (alt: snowflakes, calendar with dates marked, 2 Christmas baubles one with a rat and one with a heart that reads Joan Crawford)

I got a call at the start of December telling me my date had moved to the 22nd but I would definitely be out in 2 days. (alt: 2 alarm clocks on with bells on top)

I figured a cis man wanted to spend christmas with his grandkids and the hospital admin switched our dates, figuring trans women don’t have families or the love of baby jesus in their hearts. (alt: hovering baby jesus with a spiky halo and a big gold heart on his belly like a care bear)

On the 20th I went in for my pre-op appointments, and was given a time for the 22nd, 8:30 am. But on the evening of the 21st I got a call saying there was a cancelation and can I come in for 6:30am instead. (alt: pink 1980’s designer telephone)

After all the changes my operation took place at dawn after the longest night the year, just as the days start to get lighter. (alt: sunrise over berlin skyline)

[everythingissomewhatrepaired]

New comic out with The Offing.

https://theoffingmag.com/art/comics/everything-is-somewhat-repaired-images-that-reflect-yourself/

Thanks so much to the people who support the work. If you want to see things early and hear me talk about what goes into the comics, you can join these angels on my patreon.

https://www.patreon.com/tomorjudy

[everythingissomewhatrepaired]

Here is a comic about being cold. Thanks as ever to the wonderful angels who support the comics. If you want to join them linktr DOT ee SLASH tomorjudy

– - - - - - -

Everything is Somewhat Repaired: Why am i so cold? CW: Meds

Winter is here and you would need a geologist to count the layers I’m wearing. (alt: A mountain with rock layers wearing a scarf. Fossils in the rock layers, a dinosaur skull and spine, a fern and a trilobite.)

1. My T blockers are repurposed blood pressure medications, meaning that they’re are lowering my normal blood pressure, meaning my fingers and toes are pale little ghosts. (alt: a raised hand with a red watch band, the fingers have become blob ghosts)

2. I blasted all the insulating fur off my face with lasers. (alt: A 1950’s looking ray gun shooting a red laser beam.)

3. Or is it all an elaborate excuse to have your frozen ghosts warmed up in the hands of a hot blooded cutie? (alt: holding hands, one hand blue and one hand red)

[everythingissomewhatrepaired]

Here is a comic about The Worst Man. My posting schedule is all messed up rn sorry. Thanks as ever to the glorious patrons. You can join them at pat re on dot com slash tomor Judy. - - - - - - -   Everything is somewhat Repaired: Worst Man cw: weird masculinities, burial.

We were at a bar watching people play darts. One guy was taking up a lot of space, grabbing the others, yelling, throwing the darts aggressively to make up for his bad aim. He made me nervous at first. (alt: Man with a rough beard, arms raised, pint in one hand. wearing a shirt that says “sport game team ball”.)

Until I realised he was trying really hard to be “that guy” and his awkward performance of masculinity was suddenly so sad. This is a girl pretending to be a man and she’s a terrible actor. (alt: Self portrait looking dismayed, hand held to chest, tears welling.)

Now every time I see the “worst man” in a group of people, my brain is suddenly flooded with sympathy as if they’re a closeted trans girl, buried alive and digging in the wrong direction.   (alt: cross section of earth, tomb stone on the surface. Person having broken out of buried coffin, but heading downwards.)

I need to reset this part of my brain. (alt: Pink brain with eyeballs on stalks. out of the brain are a series of flags which read “Not everyone needs saving.”, “My experience of gender is not universal.” and “Some men are just really annoying men.”)

Footnote: I feel like this totally falls into the “all vicious homophobes are actually gay” mode of thinking, which only blames marginalised people for their/our oppression while letting straight people off the hook.

[everythingissomewhatrepaired]

Hey is a short comic about mysteries. Thanks to the angels who support the comic. If you want to join them my Pat reon dot com slash tomorjudy is the place to be for “directors commentaries” on all the comics, zine releases and other treasure. - - -

Everything is somewhat Repaired: Mystery Door

Cw: Surgery

I’m getting an orchiectomy. No balls by Xmas. I want my body to stop producing so much testosterone. If the fascists come and take my hormones, I’d rather deal with menopause symptoms than detransition.

alt txt: Rubber gloved hand holding a scalpel

Maybe my kidneys will produce something like cis lady levels of T*. But it’s hard to tell because the blockers I’ve been taking don’t distinguish between ball T and kidney T, they squash everything.

alt txt: An early stream driven steam roller

Hormone balance effects everything in your body and not knowing how things will change is kind of nerve wracking. I feel like I’m at the end of the game show, giving up the jet ski I never wanted to find out what’s behind the mystery door.

alt txt: A jet ski on fire

Footnote: * Average hormone levels vary wildly.

[everythingissomewhatrepaired]

Here is a comic about shoes. Thanks as ever to the wonderful angels who support the comics. if you want to join them please do. linktr dot ee slash tomorjudy.

Everything is Somewhat Repaired: Shoes CW feet, babies

I got these dream shoes last year. Wrestled my way onto the first buckle hole. DM’s are notorious for being tough to break in and I bled for these shoes. I bled a lot and for a very long time. Alt text: Ox blood MaryJane shoe with brass studs and an arrow-heart on the toe

12 months later and they mostly fit. I’m on the second buckle hole and can walk for hours before my toes start to rub. I like to think this was earned with blood but I have to admit it was also that hormones magically shrunk my feet. Alt text: A foot with green nail polish in a yellow starburst shape

Jane pointed out this is the opposite of pregnancy when people’s feet can grow a a size or two. Funny mine are shrinking at the same time as the hormones are making me infertile. Alt text: A baby in utero wearing cool cowboy boots.

[everythingissomewhatrepaired]

Here is a Halloween special comic about how to deal with street harassment like a horror hero. Thanks as ever to the wonderful patrons. linktr.ee/tomorjudy

In case it isn’t obvious street harassment sucks and isn’t funny, but horror movies are cool and it’s a good time of year for romantic revenge stories…?

Everything is Somewhat Repaired: Horror Heroes deal with street harassment. cw: horror, SH and sexual language

“Hey girly girl” You don’t even exist to me! alt text: Nancy from The Craft looking wild eyed and screaming with a big smile.

“Oi sexy!” Your mother sucks cocks in hell! alt text: Regan from The Exorcist with cuts on her face and yellow eyes

“oh la la!” I will tear your soul apart. alt text: A femme version of Pinhead from the Hellraiser franchise

“You know you’d look prettier if you smiled!” Be afraid. Be very afraid. alt text: Stated by Brundle-Fly from the movie The Fly, a mutant human fly hybrid, this time with a spotty bow, similar to minnie mouse or Ms Pacman.

“You can’t even give a girl a compliment these days.” alt text: Stated by an Elvis looking zombie

[everythingissomewhatrepaired]

Just a single panel comic this week as I’m making a push to finish the first issue of Montgomery Hospital. Thanks as ever to the angels who support my comic. If you want to join them https://linktr.ee/tomorjudy

Script: Everything is Somewhat Repaired: Jurassic Park is the only movie I saw as a kid where the trans characters win. I love that since the movie was released scientists have decided to dress these heroes in beautiful feathers. (Alt text Scratchy ink drawing of a Feathered Velociraptor in bright colours, with wings, raised head and bared teeth.)

[everythingissomewhatrepaired]

Here is a comic about Germany and stealing. Thanks as ever to the beautiful creatures who support the comics. If you would like to join them linktr.ee/tomorjudy and help me deal with my upcoming surgery, I would be very very appreciative.

Here is the script: Everything is Somewhat Repaired: Anmeldung cw: Bureaucracy. In Berlin, when you move house you need to register your new address with the local government. You need ID and a form from your landlord/housemate. They gave me a very funny look when I handed them my new passport. (alt text: Stern looking man modeled slightly after the actor Clifton Webb, in loose brush ink and bright colours)

“yeah, I changed my name… and a lot of other things.” He left to speak to his manager for about 30 minutes. (alt text: Judy in a with orange hair in beret looking a little ditzy, in loose brush ink and bright colours)

“Can you bring a letter from the British embassy to prove you are who you say you are?” “I have all this other paperwork right here.” “No we need a government letter. You could be your sister trying to steal your identity.” “…” (alt text: Clifton Webb looking contemptuous with green blue skin, in loose brush ink and bright colours)

blah blah blah, more hoops, a second appointment, things got sorted. No one really knew what to do with me and very luckily I got someone who didn’t feel like flexing their authority. I’m officially a lady named Judy in the eyes of the German state. (baby hippo jumping through hoops, over seen by giant eyes in german flag colours) (alt text: A baby hippo jumps through a series of hoops while being looked at by giant eyes in red black and yellow. in loose brush ink and bright colours)

But I’ve been thinking   about “stealing my own identity” a lot. Actually being closeted is what really feels like identity theft. Not to sound too much like a militant communist but transition is less like theft and more like liberating hoarded wealth. (alt text: A jaunty skeleton in a spotty dress holds up a sign that reads “Steal back yr gender” and a flaming torch in the other hand, in loose brush ink and bright colours)

[everythingissomewhatrepaired]

Here is a spooky comic. Thanks as ever to the glorious angels who support the comic. If you would like to join them you totally should.

linktr DOT ee SLASH tomorjudy

script:

Everything is Somewhat Repaired: Curses cw: meds, sleep

I recently started on a high dose of blockers again. These ones, spiro, make me sleepy. The last ones, androcur, made me sleepy and a thousand other unfortunate things.*

Before I started Medikinet, a slow release amphetamine for ADHD, It would get to the middle of the afternoon and I would have a total body shut down and have to pass out wherever I was.

I now occasionally get uncontrollably sleepy, only that little bit of morning speed, carries me through til about 19:30 AKA the cursed nap time.

I wake up after 2 hours at nearly 10pm, well rested and wondering who even invented “bed time” anyway.

*Everyone’s relationship to side effects are different and T-blockers can be very messy, or you know, Just chill! This is what happens when most trans healthcare is repurposed cis people medicine with underfunded research. But please remember: A leaky life raft is always better than outright drowning.

[everythingissomewhatrepaired]

Here is a comic about being an over dramatic egg. Thanks as ever to the angels who support the comic I appreciate it so much.If you want to join them linktr.ee/tomorjudy Here is the script:

Everything is Somewhat Repaired: Glastonbury 2008

It was the year Amy Winehouse punched an audience member. Her set was incredible.

I had recently met Jane and we were running around like berserk kittens. I was in my pre-transition “cursed sailor” phase and had a new shirt.

Some kind hearted person called out to me “I like your costume”. But the day had stretched deep into the night and this berserk kitten sailor was a sack of ragged nerves and unhinged ego.

I angrily yelled back “it’s not a costume! it’s just clothes!” It was rude and unkind and I’m embarrassed to think about it now. But I do think there’s something telling there.

yeah, I was trying really hard to find a bearable way to be a boy and was defensive as all hell. In retrospect I could laugh it off, like If I was going to be in boy drag it might as well be fun, right?

For all it’s scattered magic, that night I still wasn’t ready to tell myself the truth. I was never a cursed sailor, I was a girl. But at the same time I desperately wanted my life to feel real and not make believe.

Footnote Thank you Jane for holding my hand tight, making the world wild and exciting, and us indestructible. that weekend. and still.

[everythingissomewhatrepaired]

Here is a comic about the dead queen, in case you’re not already bored of hearing about it. Thanks as ever to the angels who support the comic. If you want to join them, please do linktr.ee/tomorjudy

Everything is Somewhat Repaired: The Queen. Cw: Tory Britain So She popped her clogs.

It feels funny to be watching my time line and taking notes of all monarchists outing themselves.

Just like the queen’s government would have done for Alan Turing and all the other heroic gays.

Meanwhile back at the Tory mystery cave, Liz Truss is busy trying to secretly stop Scotlands Gender Recognition Reform Bill.

p.s. Now would be a really good time for the UK to reckon with it’s abominable class system and it’s horrific colonial history (+ present). Now, and literally always.

[everythingissomewhatrepaired]

Here is the second part of “Babytime”. Thanks as ever to the angels who support the comic. If you would like to join them I would love you forever. linktr.ee/tomorjudy

Here is the script: Everything is Somewhat Repaired: Babytime 2 I’m a little concerned that the last comic “babytime” made me seem like a mean-hearted scrooge lady, when actually I quite like kids.

I used to work with the family program at a big museum in London and loved working with these creative, surprising and wildly diverse little humans.

What to do when you’re drawing a monster but need extra space because you love sticky google eyes, as taught to me by a four year old.

Honestly, I think I would make a pretty good mum. I like looking after people, I’m quite good at explaining complicated things in simple ways, I love an art project that is in fact a life project.

But also, my place in the world is incredibly insecure and inviting someone else to join me on this ever fraying tightrope is never going to be an option.

[everythingissomewhatrepaired]

Baby time part 1. Thanks to the angels who support the comic. If you would like to join them PLEASE DO! linktr.ee/tomorjudy for all that good stuff.

Here is the script: Everything is somewhat repaired: Babytime cw infertility

The other weekend I went to visit family. My sister had a new baby, My cousin had a bigger baby, My other cousin was pregnant and a friend was making plans.

I mostly hangout with queers, who tend to have fewer kids. (I do know a handful of excellent queer parents though.) So having so much baby time was a bit of a shock.

I decided not to freeze any “genetic material” when I started taking hormones, knowing they would almost certainly make me infertile.

I don’t regret my decision but it was an eerie feeling to be suddenly surrounded by people who had all decided on a path I had medically closed for myself years ago.