Who Even Am I?

[iguessthisismyname]

There’s nothing you can say to me, that I haven’t already said to myself.

[iguessthisismyname]

My heart has stopped once before. For another that meant the world to me but was never really meant to be mine. The love I have known to nourish my soul is forever with in me. Eternally grateful but misplaced. When will it be me? When will that love known across my lifetimes make sense in this reality? Will it ever? Can I ever be so lucky again or am I just being selfish and naive waiting for a phenomenon that’s once in life time scattered amongst the stars. Will I ever know?

I guess this is my name.

[iguessthisismyname]

I guess this is my name.

[iguessthisismyname]

New year, new problems.

I thought my bad luck streak was over.

I thought things would be different.

In the end, everything remains the same no matter how hard you try to change it or fake it until you make it.

Same shit different day.

✌️🤙

[iguessthisismyname]

Here I am, again.

Sad. A message in a bottle.

My thoughts taking over once again.

A river pouring down stream.

Is this me?

My reflection will never tell my secrets.

I guess this is my name.

[iguessthisismyname]

If I told you I want to die a lot of the time would you actually see me?

I’m just a mirage of my current self.

I guess this is my name.

[iguessthisismyname]

I’m happy in the moments of a good day. A good day I wish that would never fade. As the clock ticks and minutes pass, the memories begin to slip my mind. As they fade so do those small moments. Where for in those milliseconds of a second of a moment, I also forget that I am me.

I guess this is my name.

[iguessthisismyname]

Never thought I would ever have to take being happy.

But yet here I am.

Don’t worry though, because “everyone loves me” I always “light up the room.”

So full of shit.

I guess this is my name.

[lone-nyctophile]

Confide in me, and watch how I turn your every sorrow into incandescent poetry.

[iguessthisismyname]

I don’t understand why I’m like this. I was having such a normal feeling day and a half. But I can’t get so lucky to be depression free for 2 days. It’s just creeping on in even though I have no reason to be sad in this moment and time. I have no choice but to welcome it back in. What else am I supposed to do? It’s not like it will leave if I ask it too. It will hang around as long as it wants too. Making itself feel right at home as if it never left in the first place. Hello familiar face.

I guess this is my name.

[iguessthisismyname]

This…..

[sailorpossumart]

I made this one a couple years ago, but it’s still a favorite of mine. Planet girls having a lil picnic~

[iguessthisismyname]

Am I severely depressed?

Yes.

Am I trying to get better?

Yes.

Is it easy?

Fuck no.

But I am trying. So fucking hard.

I guess this is my name.

[iguessthisismyname]

Surrounded by so many faces last night. Even had moments of laughter. But it felt stolen.

My small moments of joy weren’t mine. They weren’t real after all.

How can it feel real when you’re just so damn broken on the inside?

I guess this is my name.

[iguessthisismyname]

You know what’s sad, I fantasize about my family caring enough about me to help me out when I’m at the lowest point in my life.

I feel pathetic for even feeling like that could be possible for me. This isn’t a movie after all. Those things don’t happen to people like me.

Never will.

I guess this is my name.

[iguessthisismyname]

I’m just so fuckin sad.

I’m so angry with myself.

I know it’s pointless to keep posting.

No one will see this anyways.

I don’t even exist.

Day by day I drift away.

The void.

I guess this is my name.

[iguessthisismyname]

Another Halloween single. Another night alone with me and well…Me.

Hello, Me.

I guess this is my name.