I had a thought in my head...

“I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived. I did not wish to live what was not life, living is so dear; nor did I wish to practise resignation, unless it was quite necessary. I wanted to live deep and suck out all the marrow of life, to live so sturdily and Spartan-like as to put to rout all that was not life, to cut a broad swath and shave close, to drive life into a corner, and reduce it to its lowest terms.” - Henry David Thoreau var _gaq = _gaq || []; _gaq.push(['_setAccount', 'UA-23447569-1']); _gaq.push(['_trackPageview']); (function() { var ga = document.createElement('script'); ga.type = 'text/javascript'; ga.async = true; ga.src = ('https:' == document.location.protocol ? 'https://ssl' : 'http://www') + '.google-analytics.com/ga.js'; var s = document.getElementsByTagName('script')[0]; s.parentNode.insertBefore(ga, s); })();

[ihadathoughtinmyhead]

Real world freshmen

Important lessons I've either learned or witnessed in the past year:

A key to happiness in life is realizing there are some things you can't control.  This was a tough one for me.  I've always believed if you put enough hard work, sincerity, and selfless love into something, things will work out.  I wouldn't call myself a control freak so much as an idealist.  Lately, I've been wondering if I'm actually pretty naive.  I guess there are some particular kinds of naivete that I wish I could have hung onto forever

Don't ever expect to receive a love you aren't giving yourself.  It belies rather embarrassingly that you don't consider your partner your equal

In every trying time is a hidden opportunity for a personal renaissance.  It's the best kept secret of hardship

Who were are and who we think we are almost never perfectly in sync.  And in our early 20s, they're near guaranteed to be farther apart than any other time in our lives.  It's outright necessary, if we care about our integrity, to take personal inventories regularly to ensure that we have retained those qualities we want and let go of those that are harming us and others.  Be consistent because hypocrisy is a dirty thing

"Self-compassion" means speaking to yourself, in your head, no differently than you would to a close and cherished friend.  If you wouldn't find yourself saying those mean-spirited things to a friend, why allow yourself to inflict that kind of self-abuse?  Tame your inner voice to be gentle and compassionate.  It's the voice of judgment you hear most and therefore the most powerful one

Immunize your life against doubt.  Thanks, DGF, for reminding us almost one year ago

To grow is to realize there is something bigger, more meaningful, more important than you.  Always.  I'm willing to stick by the truth of this lesson forever

Religious faith may not be necessary for everyone, but faith in general is

As much as you can actively try to find yourself, sometimes your true self finds you.  And tells you things you've probably known all along

Writing makes me the happiest. 

[anewgenderation-blog]

“We hold ourselves back in ways both big and small, by lacking self-confidence, by not raising our hands, and by pulling back when we should be leaning in. We internalize the negative messages we get throughout our lives, the messages that say it’s wrong to be outspoken, aggressive, more powerful than men. We lower our own expectations of what we can achieve. We continue to do the majority of the housework and child care. We compromise our career goals to make room for partners and children who may not even exist yet.” - writes Sheryl Sandberg, COO of Facebook, in her new book “Lean In”

Nicolas Kristof reviews Sandberg’s book and the status of women in leadership. (via anewgenderation)

[ihadathoughtinmyhead]

I usually don't fall for online pics of puppies and such, but BEHOLD the CUTENESS.

Here's to discovering small things that make us happy in 2013 :)

[ihadathoughtinmyhead]

lols/sigh

Got back first set of comments from my thesis advisor.

At one point in the paper, I used the word "leveraging."  His comment in the margin: "avoid using this word - it sounds like an investment banker talking!"

I don't know if he knows (though i'm fairly sure i told him)...if he does, this is clearly academia poking fun at me; if he doesn't, then his comment is perhaps even funnier...and my life has become pathetic.  sigh.

I DIDN'T EVEN MEAN TO USE THE WORD THAT WAY

[nouveauyork]

Manhattan Skyline - Secret Spot haha (September 2012)

[ihadathoughtinmyhead]

Noo Yawk it is 

[ihadathoughtinmyhead]

[nouveauyork]

Say Something - 42 Street Grand Central Station 6 Line (September 2012)

[bookshelfporn]

Reading & Cooking. Beautiful.

[ihadathoughtinmyhead]

Starry Chicago Night

[ihadathoughtinmyhead]

Last Day of Last Real Summer

today ends probably the busiest summer i've ever had.  despite the constant jumping from one project to another, this also managed to be my most reflective summer yet.  entering my last year of college, some things aren't what i expected them to be...while others are (N says that during one of our first lunches freshman fall, i said, "i wonder what i'll write my thesis on senior year."  well now I know...at least i hope so haha)

R reminded me last night that it's going to be a very emotional year for all of us.  but then she also pointed out that she felt she should be more worried and stressed out given everything that's going to be decided in the upcoming months.  so i reflected that we're either stoics by now, accustomed to all the stress, or we're just burned out and lazy by this point.  it's probably a mix of both? haha

excerpt from a conversation i had with N this summer:

"happiness isn't a choice, it's prudence and hard work"

...senior year starts tomorrow.

[ihadathoughtinmyhead]

I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived. I did not wish to live what was not life, living is so dear; nor did I wish to practise resignation, unless it was quite necessary. I wanted to live deep and suck out all the marrow of life, to live so sturdily and Spartan- like as to put to rout all that was not life, to cut a broad swath and shave close, to drive life into a corner, and reduce it to its lowest terms, and, if it proved to be mean, why then to get the whole and genuine meanness of it, and publish its meanness to the world; or if it were sublime, to know it by experience, and be able to give a true account of it in my next excursion.

Thoreau, Walden (1854), Chapter 2: "Where I Lived, and What I Lived For"

Who knew the American transcendentalists were Heideggerian phenomenologists of a different time.

[ihadathoughtinmyhead]

best weekend i've had in a long time

[ihadathoughtinmyhead]

friendsickness

working long hours means you only hang around the same group of people all the time.  i miss having control over who i get to see.  it's definitely been one of the benefits of attending school on a relatively small campus.  all the more reason to make every day count next year.  i'm guessing this is what post-college life will feel like at the beginning.

[ihadathoughtinmyhead]

long but thoughtful piece sent to me by NF during a discussion about women in business today.  definitely complicates some aspects of Sandberg's commencement address, which had instantly struck me as inspiring last month.

[ihadathoughtinmyhead]

[ihadathoughtinmyhead]

Patterns

Every six months or so, I do something really idiotic.  That's not to say I make spectacular decisions in between these episodes, but these events manage to stick out in my mind enough that I try really hard to avoid comparable levels of stupidity for a large chunk of time.

I thought I went to school with enablers, but it turns out I now also work with enablers.  

Must. survive. summer.

In happier news, I'm really liking some of my work buds.  Minus the above part.

[ihadathoughtinmyhead]

hey hey, yeah yeah