You loved them, but did they love you?|Replaced MC AU part two
someone please request me stuff, most of my maladaptive daydreaming scenarios are quite...interesting (im not gonna go into detail)
Please do not go any further if you have these tws, also if you feel this feel free to talk to me!
Playing: Je te laisserai des mots - Patrick Watson
Why did it hurt? Why did it hurt saying goodbye to all of them? You only bonded with them for 2 years yet it felt like an eternity. You never wanted to hold a grudge against them. And yet here we are, saying goodbye, not an ounce of sympathy within your mind. It’s as if you were a completely different person. You treated them as if they were your family. Yes. You did. But no more. No more of this cycle of pain, abuse and torture. You may have loved them, but you did not want to forgive them. You tried so hard to hate them. And yet you could not bare to do it. Was it Lilith trying to let you become who you were? Forgiving and kind? Who knows? But now, as you held the bottle of pills, you knew one thing for sure. You wanted to let go. You closed your eyes as you remembered what happened earlier this day.
After you ate lunch, you decided to visit Luke and the others. After a long walk, you finally reached their abode. You knocked on the door before the broad-shouldered angel greeted you. “Who is this?- Oh MC!” A warm smile greeted his face. Pain struck you in the heart. This was the last time you’d see him. He was always kind to you. Maybe that was the nature of an angel, but he always made you feel special. You silently thanked him for every kind gesture he did. “Hello, Simeon.” He raised a brow as his eyes looked for an answer. You always called him Simmy or Sim. That was weird. “Come in, MC. Luke made some cake.” He gestured slightly, turning away from you. You hummed, closing the door behind you. You felt bad. So, so bad. You felt as you did something wrong. What about Luke? What will he feel? What about Simeon? What will he do? Will I even see them in Celestia? What about...Solomon? He’s a human. He’s the only who understands me, and I’ll throw that all away along with my mortality. Guilt plagued you as Simeon glanced towards you, a worried expression on his face. “Are you alright?” He cooed, searching any clues on your face. You inhaled as you smiled towards him. “Yes. I am fine.” “If you say so...” he muttered. You reached the room where Luke was, where he was hard at work. You leaned against the door(?). He was mixing up batter as delicious pastries were adorned on the table. In the center of it was a beautiful cake, holding a gradient of blue to white, with wings on the side of the cake. Pearls were ornamented on the base of the cake as glittery dots and swirls were decorated. It looked good. Simeon coughed behind you as Luke looked towards you. His eyes widened before grinning. “MC!” He ran, dropping the whisked batter on the sink before rushing towards you in a hug. You let out a small laugh before embracing the angel. It was a bittersweet moment, hugging Luke for the last time. And yet it could mean more. You three began trying the pastries once Luke settled down. However, before you could scarf down one of the macarons, a familiar wizard appeared in the hallway, looking at his magic book. He looked forward and saw you and the others. “Why isn’t this a nice surprise?” He smirked. Simeon smiled as the grey-haired man tried the desserts with you. “What brings you here MC?” He bit into one of the chocolate covered strawberries. “Oh.. you know, I just wanted to see you guys. It’s quite suffocating in H.O.L” Luke huffed. “Those demons always go to her, not you. Why can’t they see you’re better?” You widened your eyes as silence began taking over the house. Simeon stammered. “Ah- well, maybe their still showing her the ropes?” “It’s literally December. Why would they show her the ropes if it’s months since she’s been here? Besides, when MC first went here, no one showed her how to use or do anything!” He spat. You sigh again. “Luke, they favor her. And honestly, who wouldn’t? It’s fine. I am used to it” A sad expression wore on Luke as he said. “Okay, MC...” At least he was on your side. Everyone in this house was. You felt as if you were in your own heaven. It felt great. So, so great. You’ll meet them again. You were sure of it. Your heart ached. You knew this was wrong. You clenched your fist. I’m sorry I cannot be here for any of you anymore.
As you waved goodbye to the rest of the exchange students, you headed back to H.O.L. You knew going back there would dampen your mood, You gave up trying to do anything related to them. But you guessed you would at least say goodbye. You opened the rusted door as Belphegor met your eyes. He was the only one who tried sympathizing, but in the end he gave up. He felt guilty from your death. He wanted to try and talk to you, even if it was awkward. You looked away from his stare as he tried talking to you. He no longer had a chance. He lost it long ago. But for now, Let’s go back to the present, shall we?
Now here you are, desperate to end this all. The brothers treated you like this. And now you end up like this. A mess. A broken doll with no worth. Why couldn’t it be me? It would never be you, darling. Even if you tried to be better, you’re stuck in the loop of being depressed. How can you hate them however? More specifically her. She’s such an angel. She’s kind. She’s loving. But aren’t you like that as well? You loved everyone with every ounce of your being. You helped everyone. And yet, you wish you were like her, even if you are the same. You put the pills in your mouth. Tears welled up as you drank the cup of water. You coughed as one of the pills stuck in your throat. After a bit, it died down. Your head whirled as you stumble. Was this it? Why were the pills taking effect so fast? Oh well... Tears ran through your cheeks like a marathon as notifications on your phone blew up. It was Luke,and the others. They were calling in the GC. The brothers were in the call as well. You grabbed the phone quickly as you joined the call. They were debating about something, with some nasty remarks commented from side to side. You let out an aired laugh. In your final moments, you finally were at peace with them. They all realized you were in the call. They began making small talk with you, only for them to be ignored. You felt dizzy. Your eyes became blurry as you began to feel sleepy. “MC! Why are you not replying to us?” Luke yelled. “Can’t...breathe.” You breathed out., Your chest hurt. You closed your eyes. More yells began coming out of the phone as steps boomed from H.O.L . It was the brothers. One of them began trying to open the door, only for it to be locked. Your name was called out from the other side of the door. They thought you were joking. You looked at your fingertips. They were blue. You shiver. You were so cold. It hurt. More bangs on the door were heard. You cried silently. You’re scared. So scared. What if you survive? No. That can’t happen. You glanced towards the phone. You were still in the call. The worried faces of Solomon and the others made you smile. They cared for you. The loved you. And you loved them as well. “I’m sorry...” One last tear fell on you before sighed. You remembered the brothers. You let out a desperate laugh. Cries began tearing up your room as you whimper. You loved the brothers. You loved them so much. And yet, they don’t love you. They might have been your last reason to die, but they were the first reason why you wanted to live.
I might make a fanfic about their reaction? But I kinda need everyone’s opinion if I should do it. Also, someone request/ask me anything pslsss cause i need to write. THANKS FOR READING
@assuconu, @s0ggycereal (soz if anyone’s wrong)