Afire Love

Charlotte Hills | 25 | Nurse | Engaged

[ilyxcharlotte]

its-tylerdawson·

Tyler looked up, a smiled etched on his face as he laid eyes on Charlotte. It had been a while since they’d seen each other. At least in person. They’d grown close originally in the house and somehow managed to keep in contact every now and again via facetime. He chuckled and squeezed her gently in a hug “I didn’t know you were gonna be here Charlotte, you should’ve told me..” he pulled back to look at her “you haven’t changed a bit - you haven’t even gotten taller” he joked “Of course - coming right up..” he chuckled “Did you just get in?” 

“I would have told you but I was told not to talk about it.” Charlotte replied. “I mean it would have been easier if we had a list of who was returning, it would have been great to have a heads up.” she let out a faint laugh as she thought about her recent reunion with a certain blonde, although part of her had a fairly good hunch that he was going to be there.  The girl let out a scoff and a real laugh as he commented on her height, rolling her eyes she nudged him playfully. “And you still need to work on your sense of humour.” she teased back. In all honesty she loved hanging out with Tyler. He was always like a breath of fresh air and she loved the fact that they had stayed in contact despite the distance. “I got in about an hour ago, I was just up in my room.” she smiled. “How about you? Have you been here long?”

[queenzoella]

[ilyxcharlotte]

its-tylerdawson·:

tyler honestly felt like he had been first to arrive and he had made himself more than comfortable. he couldn’t believe he had been invited back. fan favourite they had told him - how that was possible he was unsure. However he wasn’t going to say no to coming back to this place - mostly out of curiosity as to who was going to waltz in through the door. yet to see anyone else arrive, he headed to the elaborate bar reckless had set up for them - a change in pace from the liquor ban they tried to originally enforce - he poured himself a drink, smiling to himself as he heard footsteps round the corner. ‘great timing - i was just pouring myself a drink - guess i’ll make it two ‘

Charlotte had her eyes locked on her phone and the text message she was in the middle of sending as she walked through the house. She had every intention of making her way outside but as she rounded a corner and heard a voice she stopped and looked up quickly, a smile pulling at her lips instantly. “Tyler?” she grinned. “Well shit, it’s so good to see you here.” she added as she moved forward to hug him. “A drink would be amazing, if you’re offering.” she added. 

[ilyxcharlotte]

breakinbenji·

Benji’s expression remained blank as she spoke, but there was so much going on in his head. Coming back here had been a mistake. He knew that now. Emotions he didn’t want were resurfacing, pain, heartache, anger, sadness….it was all beginning to take over. He wanted to be happy for Charlotte. But he wasn’t. “I wasn’t ready…I’m sorry that you can’t fucking understand that…” he muttered in annoyance, breaking eye contact and shaking his head. “Sorry for thinking that our relationship was stable enough. Our relationship was good enough for me without marriage. I’m sorry that I wanted to wait and not be rushed. Just because I didn’t want it back then, didn’t mean I didn’t want to marry you. You were my world. You and Noah. I had everything when I had you. I didn’t need anything else.”

As soon as Benji felt her hands on his chest, he knew what was coming. All the questions he’d thrown at her one after another were too much to handle. He knew that he’d be overwhelmed if he were in her shoes right now, but had that stopped him? Not in the slightest. He easily lost his balance with the shove, but before he could fall into the pool beside him, both his hands reached out for her own and he was pulling Charlotte down with him without thinking it through. Only one of them had been dressed appropriately for swimming, and it hadn’t been her. Still, he’d done it without much thought. In fact, it was more of a reflex than anything. He was only under the water for three, maybe four seconds before he was resurfacing. His hand brushed through his wet hair, and then over his face, eyes landing on his ex….who was now in the water with him. His arm had somehow found its way around her waist. He didn’t know if that had happened while he’d pulled her into the pool, or once he’d resurfaced, but either way— it was making no real effort to move. Too many memories had happened in this pool. The one that came to mind straight away was their first kiss. The first time Charlotte had kissed him had been in this pool all those years ago. It seemed like as much as he tried, he’d never truly be able to escape those memories he shared with her. “Could have just told me to shut up. Or— or walked away…” he mumbled after a moment. He was so close  to her now. This had been the most contact he’d had with her in three and a half years. His eyes cast down to her lips for a split second— longer than a split second, actually. And he quickly realised he was still holding her against him. Releasing her from his arm, Benji let a space come between them, but didn’t say another word for a moment. He couldn’t keep fighting with her. He didn’t have a right to be angry. It was his fault they’d broken up. “Just go. Please…”

Charlotte lowered her eyes, she knew he hadn’t been ready and she wished that it hadn’t come between them but once the argument had started all those years ago it just kept snowballing until they had both walked away from each other. What she hadn’t realised at the time that unlike every other fight they had had, they weren’t going to reconnect after it. Maybe being in the mansion all those years and being forced to speak with each other was one of the reasons they had still gone back to the other time and time again, being out in the real world seemed to give them too much space to avoid each other. She closed her eyes briefly when he said she and Noah were his world. “Then why was getting married such a big deal to you? If you knew that what we had was it why put it off?” she practically whispered.  The girl regretted pushing him the instant her hands made contact with him, but before she could stop to think about it he had taken hold of her hand and she lurched forward as she was pulled into the water with him. A small yelp of surprise left her lips seconds before she hit the water, and when she resurfaced she coughed a few times while she attempted to push the mass of wet hair off her face. The instant she could see again, she became painfully aware of his arm around her waist, her body pressed up against his and the fact that their faces were inches away from each other. “You could have just stopped being such a jerk.” she murmured back, her words soft seeing as all anger had been momentarily forgotten in the shock of being pulled into the cold water. Being this close to him again stirred thing inside of her that she definitely shouldn’t have been feeling, but she couldn’t help herself. Her own eyes looked down at his lips in return and her breath hitched slightly as she resisted to urge to close the gap between them, but then he let her go and as the cool water moved between them she felt like she could breath again.. and then she realised what she was wearing. A white dress had been a good idea when she had woken up that morning, but she also hadn’t expected to end up in the pool. Folding her arms across her chest she looked at him for a few seconds before deciding walking, or swimming, away was the best thing to do. Without another word she turned and swam to the edge before climbing out, her arms once again covering her chest before glancing back at him. “And now the whole world are going to see my underwear, thanks.” she muttered, even though it was technically her fault seeing as she had pushed him first. Shaking her head again she let out a small huff before making her way inside.

[ilyxcharlotte]

breakinbenji·

“How else would you expect me to react, Charlotte?” Benji raised a brow at her. He could have handled this situation so much more maturely, but this was Benji after all….and he never handled situations maturely. As her eyes locked with his, Benji’s eyes narrowed slightly. She closed a bit of the space between them and Benji slowly closed the rest. Well, just until there was about a rulers length between them now. Again, as he stood so close to her, he realised just how much of a height gap there was between the both of them.

"So what? If you couldn’t be my wife, we couldn’t be together? Is that how things work with you? If there’s no certificate promising a lifetime together, I’m just….not worth it? I didn’t say that marriage was something I never wanted to do. I just wasn’t ready for it. We were young, Charlotte. We’re still young. If marriage was so important to you….then I’m glad that you’ve finally found someone who wants to give that to you.” his last words weren’t truthful, but they sure did sound like they were. Maybe because they’d come out of his mouth sounding so harsh. “I wasn’t terrified of marrying you. I was never terrified of doing anything with you. That year and a half we were together were some of the best memories I had. Now they’re all just painful to think about, but hey— that’s my fault right? It’s all my fucking fault because I’m the one with the committment issues. I’m the one that didn’t want to get married. I’m the one that couldn’t give you want you wanted.” he motioned his hand towards himself and then put a space between them again, not wanting to be close to her.

This had all been bottled up for so long. Benji wished that they’d had a chance to talk about things after their break up. To try and get things off their chests…..or maybe even resolve everything, but it had never happened. He’d cut her off from contacting him, and she’d moved back home. “I might have cut you off from contacting me, but I’m not the one who left the country. Even if I did contact you, was I just supposed to expect you to move all the way back over to New York for me?” he shook his head. “You could have waited. You could have fucking waited for me to be ready. We had a whole lifetime together. I didn’t want to rush anything. I wanted to just enjoy my life with you. I was happy with the way things were between us. Clearly you weren’t. You wanted more. You needed more.” he paused for a moment. “So what’s your new man like huh? Bet he’s going to fucking love watching this shit on TV. What does he do for a living? Is he a lot more put together with his life than I am? Is he less of a mess than I am? Does he make you happier than I ever could?”

“Um, maybe like an adult?” she retorted, tilting her head back to keep her gaze firm as he stepped closer, once again reminding her of how tall he actually was. Being this close to him normally would have given her butterflies but in this moment she was too angry to think about anything else.. even if he did still smell good.  “That wasn’t the case at all, and of course you were worth it. Jesus christ Benji you’ve always been worth it but I don’t understand why getting married was such a problem if you were so sure about how you felt about me, how you felt about us.” she replied, but his next words felt like a slap in the face. ‘I’m glad that you’ve finally found someone who wants to give that to you’ “You say that marriage in the future wasn’t off the table for us but at the same time everything you said, everything you’re saying tells me that you don’t want it at all. We’ve been through so much in the past, is it so wrong to want to have a day to celebrate us? A day that’s followed on by being legally recognised as each other’s partners? I have no idea when life is going to throw the next curveball at me, when something else is going to go wrong so I’m sorry but you can’t blame me for wanting to have some stability in my life.” shaking her head she glanced away for a moment, brushing the hair out of her face in frustration. “If you weren’t scared of marrying me then what were you scared of?” she asked, taking in the rest of his words but not commenting on them. It was well known by probably anyone who watched the show that commitment had always been a big thing between Benji and Charlotte.

“What was I supposed to do? Wait around for you to unblock me? Are you serious?” she almost scoffed. She had remembered the first time she noticed he had cut her off from social media, she had still been in New York and was going to reach out to him to apologise but after noticing she couldn’t contact him at all she had felt stupid. “I moved home so I could focus on my career, how was I supposed to know you even wanted anything to do with me when you had shut me out like that?” she asked, shaking her head again and rolling her lips inwards as he spoke, but as he started questioning her about her fiancé she looked back at him again quickly, her eyes narrowed. “Stop.” she warned him quietly as he continued to speak. His questions weren’t fair, and they definitely weren’t ones she could answer with cameras on them but they just kept coming and she knew now that he was heated up he wouldn’t stop, so she did the only thing she could think of to cool him down. Stepping forward again just as his last question was leaving his lips she shook her head, put her hands on his chest and gave him a shove back into the pool in an attempt to stop him from talking. There was no way she could have lied to him about anyone making her happier than he had, and she couldn’t admit that of course no one ever could without breaking the heart of the man back home in the worst way possible.

[ilyxcharlotte]

breakinbenji·

Benji didn’t look back once after stepping past Charlotte. Part of him hoped that she’d just walk away and he could carry on with his day, but the other part of him knew that she was much too stubborn to let him get away with saying something like that. Three years might have past, but Benji still knew how Charlotte worked majority of the time. His smirk only grew when he heard her speaking again, wiping it from his face before turning around to look at her again. “I am being civil about this. I’m just pointing out the nice big rock you’ve got on your finger. And now I’m out here to swim so if you’ll just be on your way and leave me alone, that’d be great.” he motioned his hand back towards the house, his eyes not once leaving hers.

“There’s nothing you could possibly say to improve this situation. Was having a fucking ring on your finger so damn important to you huh? How long have you and this new guy been together for hmm? A year? Three years? I wouldn’t be surprised if that’s how quickly you moved on. The man probably mentioned marriage on your first date and you were like, yes, he’s the one.” Benji didn’t even know what he was saying now. He was just angry at himself and taking it out on Charlotte. “Just go away. Go call your fiancee or something…”

The way he spoke to her made her scoff and roll her eyes. If he thought she was just going to do what she was told he was dead wrong, she wasn’t leaving until they had both gotten off what was clearly on their chests. “You’re not being civil about this. You’re being salty and actually really nasty.” she pointed out.  She remained silent as he spoke, her eyes locked with his as she took in each and every word but when he was done she shook her head and stepped closer to him. “No, having a ring on my finger wasn’t that important to me. Being your wife was. You still don’t get it, you were it for me. I wanted to be yours in every single way possible and I get that you weren’t in a rush because you’d already been engaged; which by the way was super spur of the moment so you are not allowed to judge me for this.. but was it so horrible for me to want to be even closer to you than we already were? Was the idea of marrying me so bloody terrifying?” she asked. This conversation was bringing up old wounds, wounds that made her feel like she wasn’t enough for him to be with her forever. She would have given him the world and she had honestly felt stupid and rejected. “It’s none of your business how long I’ve been with him. We were friends for a long time before anything happened because my stupid ass couldn’t get over you so don’t you dare accuse me of moving on so quickly. You have no idea what’s been going on because, oh yeah- you were the one who completely wiped me from everything on social media.” she said, ignoring his last comment.

[ilyxcharlotte]

breakinbenji·

Benji hadn’t seen Charlotte in a couple of days. Not since he’d found out she was engaged to another man. Did it really matter if they were married or not? Had it really meant that much to Charlotte that a break up had been the best solution to their relationship? Benji had been engaged once before, and it hadn’t ended well. He hadn’t been in any rush to do that all over again. Even if he had been crazy in love with Charlotte. Maybe it wasn’t so much the whole being engaged part that had pissed him off. Maybe he was pissed off because she’d moved on so quickly. Sure, three years was a long time, but she was getting married already? Had he been that easy to get over? All these thoughts were clouding his head.

He decided to go for a swim in the hopes of clearing his head, or just distracting himself. As soon as he stepped outside, he was face to face with the one person he didn’t want to see. Still, he wasn’t about to turn around and leave. Her simply greeting had Benji smirk faintly. “I’m sorry, did you say something? I was too busy being blinded by that massive ring on your finger—” he shook his head gently, stepping past her so he could set his things down on the chair she had just been using. Not that he knew she’d been using it.

Charlotte’s jaw dropped at the salty remark that left his lips, and she turned to face him as he stepped past her, a hand on her hip as she narrowed her eyes slightly. Every fibre in her being was telling her to let it go, to walk away and just leave it be. It wasn’t worth the fight.. but a stronger part of her stubborn brain wasn’t going to let it drop. Clearly this was one of the reasons they were invited back, to see how it would play out on screen which also made her mad, their lives weren’t some soap opera, there were real feelings involved, feelings that could get hurt. “Excuse me? That’s not fair. Can you really not be civil about this?” she asked. She’d never felt this way around him before, she had never felt like she had to be on the defence but as far as she was concerned he had no right to be pissed about the fact that she was with someone else. “What do you want me to say Benji? What on Earth can I say that will improve this situation because we’re both stuck here so we may as bloody well try and act like adults.” 

[ilyxcharlotte]

@breakinbenji

Charlotte’s eyes were closed peacefully as she laid on one of the lounge chairs near the pool, soaking up as much sun as she could. It helped her relax, something she had definitely needed after being back on the show. Her reunion with Benji had ended in a disaster and had stressed her out more than she wanted to admit, so much so that she had done her best to avoid him as much as she could but after two days of it she had gotten exhausted and decided to just lounge by the pool. It was stupid to hide from someone who if he didn’t want to talk to her, wouldn’t. They were adults now, they could be civil about it all.. right?  Realising she was probably getting very close to burning, especially with the fact her skin was once again used to Dublin’s weather, she decided to go back inside, but as she stood up and walked a couple of steps she found herself standing a few meters away from Benji. She stared at him for a few seconds as she tried and failed at figuring out how to handle the situation but in all honesty she was still pretty bitter about how they had left things off. The more she had thought about it the worse her anger got, he was the one who didn’t want to marry her so in her mind the bitterness he had shown towards her was totally uncalled for.  “Hey.” she said simply. 

[ilyxcharlotte]

breakinbenji·

Not even a day in the mansion and Benji was already regretting his decision to come back here. At first, he thought he could handle seeing his exes again. He thought he could handle coming back and just having fun. But seeing Charlotte after all these years had brought back memories. Memories of that year and a half they were in a relationship. How happy he’d been with her. How good life had been back then. He still clearly remembered the day they’d broken up. The conversation that had turned into an arguement and resulted in the end of them. He remembered how painful it had been. To suddenly lose someone he loved so much. He remembered the heartache, and the anger….not with her, but with himself.

How could seeing someone bring back so much pain? He wasn’t prepared for this. And the worst part was….all of this was just being filmed for other people’s entertainment. Her words made him scoff lightly, however a small humorless smirk played on his lips. “Right. Okay—” he stepped away from her and shook his head. “It was great seeing you again. Hope you enjoy your stay in the mansion.” again, sarcasm was evident in his tone….but also bitterness this time too.

The expression that crossed his features made her raise her brow slightly, but honestly she shouldn’t have been surprised. What did she think she was going to happen after all those years and her now being engaged? But at the same time his reaction had confused her.. what did he expect? That she would be waiting for him like she always had? That she was going to be okay living in isolation without family around? She had lost all of her immediate family, and then she had lost family again when she and Benji had split. Shaking her head she took hold of her bag as he stepped away, letting out a faint laugh. The bitterness in his voice seemed to change her own mood completely. “Yeah, you too. And thanks for helping with the bag.” she replied dryly before she started making her way to her room. 

[ilyxcharlotte]

breakinbenji·:

Benji should have seen it coming. He should have known that someone would win over her heart eventually. It had been three years after all…..something he had to keep reminding himself. A lot can change in three years. Benji on the other hand hadn’t changed much at all in those three years apart from her. He couldn’t committ to anyone after his break up with Charlotte. He had plenty of flings, plenty of one night stands….most of them just his way of getting over the woman standing in front of him now, but even when he’d met decent women who would have made amazing partners…he just couldn’t do it. He couldn’t find it in himself to let them get closer than “just friends”. Clearly the cameras filming their every move right now weren’t even holding the blonde back from expressing his shock. Maybe this was meant to be? Maybe she was meant to marry someone else. Someone better than Benji. Someone more put together than Benji. Someone that wasn’t a complete and utter mess. His brows furrowed as he saw the sadness in her eyes. Her words didn’t match the expression on her face. If she was happy, why didn’t she look happy? Maybe that was just him seeing things. “I’ll walk you to your room and then….I…I have to go get Noah, bring him here so he can get settled in…” he didn’t have to get Noah for at least three more hours, but he couldn’t be around her anymore. Not after the news. Not after seeing the ring on her finger indicating that she was with someone else.

Charlotte’s eyes roamed his face, taking in every emotion that he wasn’t even trying to hide. When he said he had to go her chest tightened once again, something that seemed to happen around him and she almost blurted out the word no. She wanted to tell him that she was sorry, and that as much as she cared about this guy, who was way better than she actually deserved, she still couldn’t bear the thought of being with anyone else, especially seeing as Benji was standing right in front of her. She was trying to hardest to hold back any tears as her eyes started to burn and she took a small step back. He had every right to want to walk away after hearing her news but that didn’t mean she wanted him to go. Which was wrong, it was so wrong because she was supposed to be committed to someone else. “I-” she stuttered out, looking up at the camera again she rolled her lips inwards and ran a hand through her hair. She wanted to talk to him, away from the cameras so she could actually speak without hurting the man on the other side of the world or embarrassing him on public television, but even then she would be a fool to admit how much she still felt about Benji. He’d made it clear he hadn’t wanted to settle down, not in the way she had wanted, the way she had always dreamt of. What if she was just ruining one relationship for someone who could have easily lost feelings in the last three years and could easily turn her away. “I can make my way there myself, if you have to go, go.” she replied quietly, her walls raising once again. 

[ilyxcharlotte]

breakinbenji·

Benji held his hands up in mock surrender. “Alright then. He is a powerful wizard.” the blonde corrected himself with a light chuckle, his brow raising when she spoke of using the Riddikulas spell against the clowns. “God, you haven’t changed have you? Still such a fucking nerd…” he couldn’t help but tease the woman again even though he’d always liked the nerdy side of her. Maybe that was because Benji was just as nerdy as she was.

“Whoa, not even five minutes in the mansion and you’re already refusing to use your manners.” Benji teased jokingly. Like he could talk anyway. Manners weren’t exactly something he used either. He smiled sadly to himself when she told him he wasn’t an idiot. “Debatable.” was all he muttered under his breath in reply before looking back at her. “Oh yeah, being on my best behavior is so much fun. Way more fun than causing trouble…” sarcasm was evident in his tone as a small smirk formed on his lips, taking the lead in carrying her bag up to the second floor while he listened to her speaking. “Glad to hear that they’re doing fine. Three boys is a lot. I can barely keep up with one.” he joked. Noah was actually a very easy to take care of kid. He didn’t act like he was spoiled, he never complained or spoke back to his father. Benji was lucky he had such a sweet little boy. He got to the top of the stairs before setting the suitcase down again so she could wheel it now, his attention flying back to her fast when she mentioned a fiancé. Which he soon regretted because it obviously showed how taken back by the news he was. “Oh— oh, you’re…..getting married?” of course she was getting married. It’s what she had wanted, right? It’s what Benji hadn’t been able to give her. It was pretty much the reason why they’d broken up. He should have known she’d find someone else within those three and a half years of being apart. He on the other had, hadn’t had that kind of luck. “Congratulations…I guess. I’m glad you’re….” getting what you want? “…happy.”

As he agreed with her, Charlotte smiled proudly. “Good, and don’t you ever forget that.” she replied playfully. When he said she hadn’t changed she laughed faintly, if only he knew. If she had changed she would have been able to walk into this house and see him without feeling anything at all but like always there was something about him that always got to her, that part of her she knew she could never change no matter how hard she tried. “Why change something that’s already perfect?” she joked lightly, knowing that she was in no way perfect. With everything that had gone on in her life and the mental state she had been in during most of her time in the mansion she was far from perfection, but sarcasm was also a big part of her coping mechanism. “And whatever, you’re a nerd too so you can’t judge me.” she added with a laugh.

“Yep, get used to it.” she shrugged. His quiet reply made her glance up at him again quickly. It wasn’t debatable for her, he was better than he gave himself credit for, it just made her sad to think that he never believed that about himself, no matter how many times she tried to tell him. “As if you’ve ever been on your best behaviour.” she let out a small scoff and rolled her eyes as she smiled back at him. “It’s pretty crazy but they handle them fine. They’re all really good boys.”

The expression on his face as he took in the news of her engagement honestly made her feel sick to her stomach. She knew how much it hurt every time he was with someone else.. she remembered the pain she felt when he himself had gotten engaged and for a split second she saw the same shock flash through his eyes, she heard in in his words as he spoke. She nodded once at his question, once again all too aware of the cameras that were on them. Glancing up at them quickly she forced a smile on her face, one that was convincing enough to any viewers watching but most likely not someone who really knew her, especially because she knew there was a hint of sadness in her own eyes. This conversation wasn’t supposed to hurt this much. She was the one who had said yes to someone else, she was the one getting married, who was about to start her own family with this guy, she shouldn’t be upset about that fact and she wouldn’t dare admit her doubts about the man she had agreed to settle with. “Thank you.” she said politely in what sounded like a customer service voice. “I am really happy.” she lied, resisting the urge to glance at the cameras again. 

[ilyxcharlotte]

breakinbenji·

“I thought he might have been scared by a few things, but he wasn’t. Unless he’s just not telling me….which is unlike him. I think he thinks he’s an all powerful wizard who can defeat anything and everything. Except clowns. He and I fucking hate clowns.” Benji laughed lightly, always speaking about his son with a smile on his face…no matter who he was talking to about him. Noah was the light in his life. He couldn’t imagine his life without his son. Being a single parent from the very beginning had been tough on the blonde, and he was so grateful for the help he had from family and friends when it came to looking after Noah and helping Benji whenever he needed it. Charlotte had been one of those people once upon a time. She didn’t have to help him with his child, but she had. She’d helped him out a lot without expecting anything in return. At the time, Benji had really felt like he had his own little family of three. It was just taking that next step in their relationship that had freaked him out.

“I’ll see what I can do….I’ll have a talk with him.” because in the end, it was really up to Noah to make the final call. He was old enough to think for himself. And if he wanted to see Charlotte, Benji would let him. And if he didn’t…..well, he’d support his son no matter what.

"Do I at least get a please? Or are you going to be a jerkasaurus too?” Benji smirked faintly, raising a brow at her as they stopped at the stairs and he grabbed the handle of the bag again. “Well everyone already knows I’m an idiot who loves to mess up his own damn life so, I guess they won’t be seeing anything differently this time around…” he tried to make a joke, but it was true. He’d messed up his life multiple times during the show. He had regrets, and even a few haters. By now, he was just used to it all….and learned to ignore it. “Just gotta make sure I don’t do anything my mother won’t approve of…” he joked again. “You got anyone back home watching you? Or are you free to cause havoc where ever you go?”

“Well that’s good at least,” Charlotte smiled softly before letting out a laugh. “Hey, he doesn’t think he’s a powerful wizard, he knows.. because clearly he is one. His powers are just untapped.” she shrugged. She bit her tongue to stop herself saying she remembered the fact that he hated clowns, she remembered more things than she cared to admit. “You know you could just use Riddikulus on the clowns and then they won’t be so scary anymore?” she offered with a small smirk. When he said he would talk to Noah she nodded in understanding, of course it was the boy’s choice, Charlotte wasn’t going to force him to see her, or force Benji to let her see him. At the end of the day, as it had always been, she loved Noah like crazy but she had always been careful not to overstep especially during the times in the past where she and Benji weren’t actually together. Feelings were messy and she had never wanted her relationship or unresolved feelings with Benji to interfere with Noah’s life, that wasn’t about to change, especially now after all these years.  “That’s completely fine.” she smiled gently.  Raising a brow, she shook her head. “Nah I don’t feel like saying please. But I guess I can maybe thank you when we reach the top of the stairs.” she joked. Listening to him speak she couldn’t help but frown slightly. “You’re not an idiot.” she replied softly before laughing faintly at the comment about his mother. “Yeah because you’ve always been on your best behaviour.” she teased lightly. At his question her chest tightened uncomfortably. He was going to find out eventually, and if she didn’t tell him now and he found out some other way she knew it would just be worse. She needed to be upfront with him.  “Well Grace and Max are probably watching, their boys have grown up so much and they actually had a third one believe it or not.. so now they’ve got Eric, Phillip and Flynn.” she smiled softly at the cute little theme they had going, and how cute they were as a family. Their little family really were something Charlotte was looking forward to having, if it ever happened. “There’s also um..” she trailed off for a second as she fiddled with the ring on her finger. “My fiancé.” she admitted softly as she looked up at him again. 

[ilyxcharlotte]

breakinbenji·

Benji raised his brows when she mentioned her qualification. “Wow. So you’re a nurse now? I’m proud of you.” did it really matter if he was proud or not? It had been three and a half years since he’d last seen or heard anything from her. Things were off between them now. He could feel the awkward tension in the air. And he knew that it wasn’t going to be easy to get rid of. Their break up, unfortunately, hadn’t ended on good terms. As much as he would have liked to stay in contact with Charlotte, things had been way too messy between them to even try. At the time, they had both wanted different things. She wanted to settle, and he didn’t. He only wished that the outcome of the arguement that had ended them, could have gone differently. Or that he would have fought harder to be with her. There were so many regrets, but he hadn’t thought about all of this in years. In fact, he tried to keep Charlotte out of his mind as much as possible. It had been successful up until right now.

Benji knew that bringing up Noah was going to bring sadness to the woman, but he wasn’t going to just….not talk about his son. Especially since he was here in the mansion with him. And he’d sooner or later run into Charlotte, no doubt. Benji wondered if his son would even remember her. He hadn’t spoken about her in years. “Eight’s a good age to introduce him to Harry Potter movies right?“ he was glad that nothing in the movies seemed to scare Noah. When she said she’d missed him, Benji chewed his inner cheek subconsciously before speaking again. It was something he did when he was either nervous, or just deep in thought about something. In this case, it was the latter. “Well he’ll be staying here in the mansion with me so maybe you’ll get to see him again…” he wasn’t sure if that was a good idea….which was why he’d been contemplating his words in his head for a moment. He also really wanted to tell Charlotte that he missed her, but he couldn’t say that. Not when he was the reason why they’d broken up in the first place.

“Says the one that’s refusing help when she evidently needs it.” Benji pointed out with a small smirk. Despite the awkwardness in the air, it was hard not to tease the woman. It was like a habit of his, it seemed. Grab any opportunity he had to tease her. He stepped into the mansion with her and set her bag down, his attention going back to her now. He’d almost forgotten how much of a height difference there was between them.“I never thought I’d be back here again.” the blonde admitted after she spoke. “Apparently we’re some of the fan favourites…” he added with a light chuckle, his expression soon softening. “Do you need help getting your stuff up to your room? Or have you totally got this?”

“Sure am, thank you.” she smiled softly. Becoming a nurse was something she had decided she wanted to do after a little while of being in the mansion, after losing her brother. It was a goal that had come out of nowhere but one that she had stuck to and every day she worked she felt like she was accomplishing something, like she was finally making a difference on the world for once. It had also helped distract her from thinking about the blonde in front of her, and it had given her a reason to stay in Dublin instead of finding her way back to him, something she had been tempted to do more times than she would like to admit. Standing right in front of him and having all of these thoughts and emotions in her mind but not knowing how or wanting to say them was honestly driving her a little crazy. She had always been open with Benji, she’d always been able to talk to him so why was this awkwardness lingering?  “Eight is definitely a good age to introduce him to them, he wasn’t scared by anything at all? The first time I watched them I used to avoid looking in sinks because I was terrified from when Moaning Myrtle told Harry she saw yellow eyes down there right before she died.” she admitted with a little laugh. As Benji got lost in thought, Charlotte tilted her head to the side slightly, watching him curiously. When he said that Noah would be staying in the mansion her heart skipped a beat, she didn’t know if she could handle seeing him after all these years or even if he would remember her but at the same time she had missed him so much she would go crazy trying to avoid him. “I’d like that..” she replied softly. 

As he teased her, Charlotte narrowed her eyes playfully and put a hand on her hip as the came to a stop inside the mansion’s doors. “Okay, so I admit that I may need your help, you don’t have to be a jerkasaurus rex about it.” she said as she tried and failed to keep a straight face. “I guess so. I forgot how crazy it was to be honest.. to have people watching everything we do.” 

[ilyxcharlotte]

kailanilea·:

kailani was nervous to be back at reckless, though there were a lot of good memories that the mansion held, there were also a lot of bad ones that tied into those. however, she tried to push those to the side. she wanted to give this place a new beginning. hanging out poolside, legs dangling in the clear water as she sat on the ledge. it was so much quieter than she’d remembered, she had yet to run into anyone just yet. at least for the moment. as if like clockwork she heard approaching footsteps, turning to glance behind her and catch sight of the new arrival - “about time someone else crashed the party” 

Charlotte was almost at the end of her own personal little exploration of the house, she only had the pool to check out now.. the pool that held some of her best and worst memories. She’d saved it last, but as she approached she noticed a girl sitting there and a grin pulled at her lips and she momentarily pushed those memories to the back of her mind. “Holy crap, Kailani! It’s so good to see you!” she said as she sat down next to the girl and hugged her from the side. “What have you been up to?”

[ilyxcharlotte]

breakinbenji·

“Just good?” Benji raised a brow. Not that being good was a…bad thing? He just thought he’d get more than that as an answer. Maybe things were more awkward between them than he thought. “I’ve been good…” he paused for a moment before realising that he couldn’t just end his answer like that. “I opened up a nightclub with Blair a few years ago…” it had been a project he’d started with his best friend only months after his break up with Charlotte. At first, it was just a good distraction for him. Planning, and building…..it kept his mind off the woman he was still trying to get over. In the end, the club had been a success and was now very popular in New York. “It’s called The Warehouse…” irrelevant information since he doubted she’d actually ever step foot in the place. “Noah’s obsessed with Harry Potter. We’ve read all the books together. And watch all the movies.” he trailed off with his words.

The worst part about the break up for Benji hadn’t been his broken heart. It had been the moment he realised that Charlotte wasn’t going to be in Noah’s life anymore. She’d been there from the beginning. Shared a close bond with the child. He was four and a half when the couple had broken up. Old enough to realise that someone he cared about was no longer around. Old enough to question it too. He’d asked his father where Cherrie was a lot. And Benji could never give a proper answer. This had gone on for months, until one day….he just stopped asking. This had resulted in Benji falling into old habits. Charlotte had been his last serious relationship. He wasn’t going to let anyone else get close to him or his son. He couldn’t let his son go through that again. Especially because Benji knew he was bad at relationships. He knew that sooner or later, he’d fuck up anything good he had going on in his life. That’s what had happened with him and Charlotte.

Snapping out of his thoughts, Benji eyed the woman with a raised brow as she attempted to get her bag up the steps. He knew Charlotte. Or at least, he liked to think he did. He’d spent a whole year and a half in a committed relationship with her after the show had ended. “Still as stubborn as I remember…” he commented as he took a few steps down to where she was. “It’s a pretty great step, but the mansion is a lot better inside.” he reached for the handle of the bag before she could get in another word, taking it up the stairs to the front door. “Come on, you can carry your bag up to the second floor if you want…”

“Yeah..” she replied before realising she was actually being really rude. Normally she’d be blurting out pretty much everything she had been up too between now and the last time they saw each other, but the fact that she was now with someone else and actually engaged honestly made her feel a little awkward. She didn’t know why she didn’t want him to know, if he didn’t already. Maybe it was because the breakup had been so hard on her and being without him had hurt her more than she could have ever possibly imagined.  There was once a point where she couldn’t see herself with anyone but Benji. For so long it had just been him, and even when she started dating Aidan it had taken a while for her to actually be okay with being with someone else. “Sorry, I have been good. Really good actually, I got my qualification and I’ve been working at St. James’s Hospital.”  She smiled softly as he spoke about opening a nightclub with Blair. It was good to see him invested in something he enjoyed and she was glad he had done it with his best friend. “That’s really awesome, congratulations to you both.” she replied sincerely. The second Noah’s name was dropped into the conversation Charlotte felt her heart sink again. Leaving Benji had been hard, but knowing she was leaving Noah too almost shattered her. She wasn’t his mother, but right from the start she had loved him more than words could express and even to this day she still often got upset thinking about him. The little boy had been one of the brightest lights in her life, and her world was so much different without him. “Really? That’s super cute.. I’m glad he’s old enough to finally be a little Potter-head.” she said with a sad smile. She was of course happy he was doing well and she was over the moon that he liked Harry Potter but she also felt his absence even more when talking about him. “I’ve missed him..”  As Benji called her stubborn, Charlotte raised a brow and looked back up at him. “Hey, I’m not the stubborn one here. You are.” she replied, the hint of a smile pulling at the corner of her lips as she shook her head and followed him up the stairs. “Thank you.” she said, glancing over at him slightly. He was so close now that she could smell his cologne and in all honesty it made her a little flustered, that and up close she was reminded of just how tall he was compared to her. Part of her had the urge to just break the stupid ice between them and rush forward and hug him, but she was also painfully aware of the camera’s that would be on them and the fiancé sitting at home watching.. so she controlled herself, focusing on the mansion again. “It’s so weird being back here..” she admitted as she came face to face with the front doors. 

[ilyxcharlotte]

breakinbenji·

This had all happened once before. When the MTV show had first aired. When strangers were moving into a mansion to live together for the world to enjoy through the screens of their TV. The only difference now was that Benji had a past with a lot of people coming back to the show. He was close with a few people still….even kept in contact with a lot of them, but the rest? He hadn’t seen in a long time. Hell, he hadn’t heard anything from Charlotte since their break up. Since they’d gone their seperate ways. In order to keep his mind clear of thinking about the woman, he’d even gone as far as removing her from his social media.

Now, here he was, standing on the same stairs he’d met Charlotte on. It was a bit of a déjà vumoment for both of them. He tried to seem as casual as possible, smiling when his name fell from her lips. He didn’t exactly want things to be awkward between them— especially because he didn’t know how long he’d be in this place with her. “I’ve had better days…” better days meaning, days that didn’t involve running into his ex, but she didn’t need to know that that was what he meant. He noticed her accent was much more stronger than what he remembered. He hated how quickly he could pick up on the little things that had changed.

“It’s been a while…” totally his fault. “How have you been?” he asked, mainly just to keep a conversation going. Did he really want to know how she was going? How she’d been living her life without him? Not really. “Do you need help with your bags?” the blonde asked after a moment, the memory of when they first met playing in his mind.

Charlotte couldn’t help but give him a quick glance over, her eyes returning to his face as he spoke again. It was sad to think that she could be so close to someone she had once known so well and at the same time feel so distant from him. The truth was she had no idea what he had been up too or how much he had changed in their time apart, but she did know one thing, he looked just as good as he always did. She almost wanted to smack herself for still being so physically attracted to him but she also knew she couldn’t help it, it was almost like an instinct.  “Yeah?” she replied a little vaguely as she snapped herself out of her own brain. She wondered what the meaning was behind his words, whether it was being in the mansion in general or this moment here and now that was reason for his answer, but she also didn’t know how to ask that. She had never really filtered anything around him before, so being at a loss for words now was new for her.  “It has been a while.. I’ve been good. How about you?” she replied simply, but the instant her attention was brought back to her current life she felt the weight of the ring on her left hand and she subtly moved it behind her back. At his offer she couldn’t help but smile slightly before shaking her head. “Oh no, I’ve got it-” she replied almost stubbornly as she attempted to pull the bag up the steps again, frowning and turning to look at it as the wheels got stuck. Tugging on it a few times she managed to contain a little growl of frustration before she stopped and looked back up at him with a forced smile. “Totally got it. I’m actually just going to chill here for a while though.. I mean, this is a pretty nice step so I’m just going to..savour my time with it. Yep.” she said lamely. It almost could have been a joke or words of sarcasm if she wasn’t so stubborn and determined to make him think she didn’t need his help. 

[ilyxcharlotte]

breakinbenji·:

 { { @ilyxcharlotte } }

Benji wasn’t that excited to be coming back to the Reckless mansion after all these years. Sure, they had been very memorable years for the blonde, but he knew there were going to be people here that he didn’t want to run into. People he had tried to leave in the past. People he’d now have to live under the same roof as. With Noah in the care of Benji’s younger brother Carson, Benji had arrived at the mansion by himself at first. Noah would join him here later on that evening, but for now….Benji had time to give himself a tour around the house and let the memories come flooding back all at once.

By the time he’d made his way around to the front of the mansion again, a familiar face had showed up outside and Benji thought he’d go and greet her. It was the polite thing to do…right? Even if it was his ex-girlfriend. It had been years since the last time he’d seen her and he wasn’t exactly sure how to approach her, or what to say to her…

“Hi, Charlotte…” he felt so weird calling her by her name. He’d always stuck with several nicknames/pet names when they had been together. Now, she was practially a stranger to him and so addressing her as Charlotte seemed like the best thing to do.

From the moment Charlotte had received the offer to go back to the Reckless mansion her nerves had been all over the place. Initially she had declined but she had ended up taking the offer only because her fiancé could see she was interested in it and so he had convinced her to do it. Which would have been great except he didn’t know what Charlotte was actually worried about. The mansion held so many memories and was easily one of the most important parts of her life, but every time she looked back on those days she realised that the memories also generally revolved around one person in particular.. someone she could never shake no matter how hard she tried. She was worried about temporarily leaving her current life in Dublin mainly because she was worried she would like her past better. Not that she mentioned a word of that doubt to her partner, instead she had smiled and kissed him goodbye as she boarded the plane, excited and anxious to be going back.  She stood at the bottom of the stairs that led to the front door, feeling like she was in the exact moment she was all those years ago when the show started. Her eyes had been bright and excited at the chance to live in a mansion, no matter the reason she was on the show. She remembered the awe she felt as she had attempted to carry her bag up the steps, much like she was doing now, and she remembered seeing him standing there with a smile on his face as he offered to help her lift her things up the stairs... and just as she remembered that exact moment, as though they were in some cliché movie, he walked through the front doors.  Her chest tightened at the sight of him, her eyes widening only slightly at the what should have been an expected coincidence. “Benji..” his name fell from her lips so naturally, even as she noticed how odd it was to hear him call her by her full name.  “How are you?” she asked softly but a little awkwardly, her Irish accent back in full swing after once again living there for the past three and a half years... which also happened to be the amount of time since she had seen him.