i've been inactive here for quite a while now but lately i've been in a pretty bad mental health crisis and i need help
so yeah, do you guys have any tips on how to be happy? i'm only 21 but i've been depressed for the past decade and honestly i'm done
i'm a trans pansexual artist with adhd and my whole life i've been extremely emotional, crying all the time because i experience everything so deeply, in day to day life it's hard for me to properly take care of myself, both mentally and physically and often i have to rely on others for help and i'm pretty sure that at some point i really stopped liking myself at all
and i crave being carefree, i crave being myself, i crave being content about my life, being unmoved by all the inconveniences
but... i don't know how, because even if i'm feeling mostly fine, the moment something bad happens i immediately turn suicidal, feeling like a failure, like i need to flee and disappear forever
and it's not because i want to die but because i so desperately want to live, but i'm so afraid of being rejected and being alone
and unfortunately, i know that if i want to feel fulfilled, that if i want to live life my own way, and if i want to medically transition in the future, rejection from others is inevitable
so please tell me, how are you people so carefree and brave? how are you enjoying your own presence without *having to* rely on others? how are you feeling good about yourself without being afraid of other people's opinions?
i'm done being my own worst enemy, i just don't know where to start
