🐘THE ELEPHANT IN THE ROOM 🐘
I still don't understand, at this point I don't know if it's a flaw of mine, that all those gestures like posing in photos, carrying bags, matching clothes and identical accessories are some kind of demonstration of the deep love that someone has for another. Because if this is the case, how superficial is it all, right? Everything they see as a gesture of love is completely external; there's nothing that comes from within.
I've talked about this a few times with @sgiandubh; when I've gone to different SH events I've been surprised that most of the people who follow SH are much older than me. And seeing what they call love I'm even more surprised, what experiences have these people had?
There are certain aspects of expressing love that are very personal, it's true. It's not the same for an extrovert as for a shy person, or someone who has had complicated or failed relationships, that always leaves a mark. However, all of us who have ever been in love, or even more than once, know what it's like at the beginning. Those furtive glances you can't avoid, the butterflies in your stomach that always manifest as nervousness, and above all, that silly little smile that sticks on your face, which, even if you don't notice it yourself, is like an open book to others.
For many people, this infatuation phase lasts for a while; for others, it lasts a lifetime. I've known some very old couples who looked at each other as if they were the only two people on earth. It's also true that infatuation and love aren't exactly the same thing; the latter usually comes after the former. But damn it, we've seen pictures of this supposed couple almost from the beginning, and forgive me if I'm being a bit harsh, but any pig in a sty looks at the stale bread they've been given with more relish than SH looks at MW.
That's my elephant in the room, or rather, the lack thereof. Where are the glances, the silly little smile, from a guy who spends all day with a grin plastered on his face?! The affectionate gestures (he does them, we've seen them before), the complicity…
I'm sorry, but if this is the great love all these people are buying into, I understand why the world is in such a mess. And that's very sad. This means they'll buy anything sold to them in the name of something real, not because it doesn't exist—real love does—but because they can no longer distinguish it. Someone will sell them a lame duck and they'll see a swan.
I'm sorry SH, but right now you're not my favorite person, not because of the relationship itself—you're the one dating her, your life, your rules—but because you're trying to sell it to all of us with every possible resource at your disposal, and excuse me, but this is a scam.
Think for a moment about what turns you into.
That is not love - that is a transactional arrangement both parties are hoping will be lucrative for a while.
The problem is their respective expectations are clearly different, as far as the scope and the depth of the commitment go. She is desperate for more and goes to almost unthinkable lengths to insert both herself and that little girl in a picture where they don't really belong.
For him, I suspect that is a long and cynically planned move. There are pointers and feelers in that direction, have been here for quite a while, laid in plain sight. Will go back to this very soon, in a separate post.
@ellenmillpe, you said everything that needed to be said about the Mommies. They need their fairy tale and they will cling to it for as long as this woman will be around. When she won't, they'll migrate to the next touted paramour. Shamelessly - a geriatric army of ass-kissers, ready to buy even the most absurd narrative, provided it aligns to their own fantasy.
It's all transactional and so very sad, really.
