what am I even doing with my life

Kyle | 16 | Kemetic Pagan I don't know what I'm doing with my life

[sommerlaune-deactivated20260523]

I want to make you so fucking happy that you forget every bit of sad in you

[nonlinear-nonsubjective]

is anyone else annoyed by the stereotype that young people’s phones are a loud and annoying device? because i have never heard anyone under 30 who doesn’t have their phone on vibrate. like 100% of the time if the marimba ringtone starts blaring it’s the older generations.

[n0kiv]

Dead at the “lol you wild. Wyd though”

[silkktheshocka]

Pops real

[kingharlevigilante-deactivated2]

😂😂😂

[theblackparatrooper]

Me as a dad, that mom needa chill.

[rob-walks-deactivated20210614]

im deadass the father. bring food from anywhere idc

[mathprofessorquotes]

”I wanted to show you all a Halloween joke and I can’t stop laughing at this one.” - Probability professor

[imoveslowandsteady-blog]

Parents Picking Their Child's Name: Eh, I like the way it sounds. Sure.

Writers Picking Their Character's Names: What genre is it? How old are they? Active or passive? Blood type? Country of origin? Is it a family name? What does the name mean? Is it pretentious? Is it not pretentious enough? Can it be used as a metaphor? What position was the planet to the stars at the exact moment of their birth? Is the name gay enough?

[coluring]

there is nothing I want more in life than to be a part of this

[urso2000andlate]

“dinner’s ready”

“there’s 5 minutes left can you set the table”

[gmbencompetence]

We need to have a nomination for “Stupidest thing Tumblr.com has ever believed” and just move into an official Top 10 List.

For my nominations, I’m putting up:

If you eat a chocolate bar a very specific way, you will break physics and get infinite chocolate.

or

It is impossible that you spelled “Berenstain Bears” wrong and is, instead, more likely that the universe fractured into separate, overlapping realities in the last 20 years.

I can’t decide which is more beautiful. It’s why we need a vote.

[jupiterjunebug]

this is a picture of the human brain at the moment of death. tragic and beautiful

[gmbencompetence]

Fuck. That is a damn good nomination.

[thisisdefinitelyacreativename]

if you close your eyes when the train hits your brain will assume you are dead. Some find this comforting.

[gmbencompetence]

We’re getting into the good ones now. This is some classic Tumblr.

[turtle-powered]

Two old favourites:

“Bitch, That’s the Tubby Custard Machine” (http://imgur.com/gallery/IObQF)

and the horse dildo that was passed off as someone’s arm. (http://abakkus.tumblr.com/post/48958415162)

[gmbencompetence]

This is rapidly becoming a master post of ignorances and I could not possibly be happier.

[analienorsutin]

Rare blue watermelon

[sickofimmortality]

That disease where you get purple eyes, no period, and no body hair

[akiraita]

How have we gone this far without anyone mentioning the bird in the chocolate fountain

[unicornfan]

soap makes water molecules smaller

[imoveslowandsteady-blog]

me, three days w/o an emotional breakdown:wow!!! im cured! i dont need a therapist or medication (:

me,today: never mind!!!!!!!!!!! never mind!!!!!!!!!!!

[dvm-dvn]

[amargedom]

You know who’s gonna give you everything? Yourself.

Diane Von Fursenberg (via amargedom)

[imoveslowandsteady-blog]

me: wakes up

me: continues 2 chill for another 3 hrs in bed for good measure

[ara-kita-deactivated20170823]

“stop shipping real people!” they cry

“no” i respond, packing one more person into a box and sealing it shut. this one goes to fedex in the morning.

[gnarly]

“add me on snapchat” more like we probably wont send each other snaps but we’ll look at each others stories 

[potatosocietyy]

idc I got a new sc friend and get to experience someone else’s life & good moments

[imoveslowandsteady-blog]

Person: Your room's a mess

Me: It's called art

[memeufacturing-deactivated20161]

nurse: doctor!!! This man needs an IV right away!!!! roman empire doctor: four??? Four of what????? He needs four of what??????????

[almond-milk-hotel-deactivated20]

It’s really confusing to me to think that all these horrid old politicians were once babies… kids… awkward teenagers… Like, they didn’t just magically surface from the earth’s core already saggy and wrinkled sacks of evil