Harry: What should I be for Halloween?
Draco: My boyfriend
Draco: Well no I’m joking
Draco: … Unless
Harry: That’s not scary
Ron: It’s for me. It’s my nightmare.
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@incorrect-drarry-quote
Harry: What should I be for Halloween?
Draco: My boyfriend
Draco: Well no I’m joking
Draco: … Unless
Harry: That’s not scary
Ron: It’s for me. It’s my nightmare.
Draco, checking his contacts: Harry, Crabbe, Goyle- Harry, Crabbe, Goyle- Harry, Crabbe, Goyle- Harry Crabbe, Goyle- Harry, Crabbe, Goyle…
Draco: *gasps* how can I only have three friends?!
Draco: And one of them is dead!
Draco: I asked Harry out.
Blaise: Oh, I’m sorry.
Draco: Why?
Blaise: I assumed he said no.
Draco: He said yes.
Blaise: Then I’m sorry for him.
Draco: Please this is the 10th time its happened, I'm begging you go to a doctor.
Harry: I'm sorry is this OUR broken nose? Stay out of it.
Draco: Harry is good at kissing. So good I want to punch the shit out of the person who taught him.
Harry: Hey, wanna have sex?
Draco: I have a gun in that nightstand beside the bed. If I ever say no to that question, I want you to take it out and shot me because I’ve obviously gone crazy.
Draco, eating breakfast: Oh, hello again. We really need to stop meeting like this.
Harry, who walked out of his bedroom in his house into his kitchen: Maybe we would, if you would STOP BREAKING INTO MY FUCKING HOUSE
Hermione: Do you know what bees make?
Ron: Honey?
Hermione: Yes dear?
[Harry turns to Draco]
Harry: Draco, do you know what bees make?
Draco: Some stupid annoying sound, what the fuck do you want.
Cedric: Are you fucking my boyfriend?
Draco: Not in this exact moment, are you blind or something
Draco: Can you do a backflip?
Harry: No
Draco: Same, we have so much in common I think we need to get married.
[At the Yule Ball]
Draco: I’m gonna throw ron to the punch of the dance
Harry: No Draco you can’t do that! You know we can’t drink alcohol…
Draco: *throws Ron Weasley to the punch*
Harry: send dudes
Draco: *sends him a nude*
Harry: that's not what i meant! i'm in a battle!
Draco: oh
Harry: nice dick tho
Lucius: Stop dating my son!
Harry: You know what? I’m going to start dating him even harder!
Draco: Bitches be like “I’m fighting my own demons” and then the demons seem to be me
Harry: Could you get over it I only called you demon ONCE in a fight
Draco: You can trust me. Let’s not forget who pulled you out of the river last time we went camping.
Harry: Let’s not forget who pushed me in.
Hermione: If you got arrested, what would be the charges?
Theo: Theft
Ron: Disturbin the peace
Pansy: Aggravated assault
Draco: Arson
Harry: All the above. In that order, probably
Harry, staring at Draco: he wants me so bad
Ron, jokingly: oh, really? Where are you getting that idea?
Harry: The voices in my head
Ron, unable to tell if he’s joking or not: Ah…