Scott: “Wallace, you would be a great YouTuber.”
Wallace: “Why? Is it because of my looks?”
Scott: “No- well, maybe. But mainly because you don’t care about haters.”
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@incorrect-scott-pilgrim-quotes
Scott: “Wallace, you would be a great YouTuber.”
Wallace: “Why? Is it because of my looks?”
Scott: “No- well, maybe. But mainly because you don’t care about haters.”
Kim: “The eagles won last night.”
Stephen: “Oh, did you watch the game last night?”
Kim, covered in blood and scratches: “What game?”
“They don’t call me *bleep*ing dumbass *bleep*head idiot for nothing!”
- Scott
“I’m not an early bird or a night owl. I’m some sort of permanently exhausted pigeon.”
- Kim
Young Neil: “What do you call a person with poor hearing?”
Kim: “What?”
Young Neil: “I SAID, WHAT DO YOU CALL A PERSON WITH POOR HEARING?”
Stephen: “I need advice.”
Young Neil, eating cookie dough for breakfast: “You’ve come to the right person.”
Scott: “Someone told me once that shooting stars are really just angels throwing away their cigarettes before God could catch them smoking.”
Wallace: “Someone get me a young child, I have wisdom to pass down.”
Envy: “Wakey wakey, eggs and bakey!”
Todd: “What if I suddenly decided I’m vegan?”
Envy: “Wakey wakey, vegetables and sadness!”
Gideon: “The eagles won last night.”
Lucas: “Oh, did you watch the game last night?”
Gideon, covered in blood and scratches: “What game?”
Gideon: “I love this picture of all of us. We were so happy.”
Lucas: “Where’s Matthew?”
Gideon: “He wasn’t one of us yet. That’s why we were so happy.”
Young Neil: “What if mayonnaise came in cans?”
Scott: “That would suck because you can’t microwave metal.”
Kim: “Good morning to everyone except these two.”
“They don’t call me *bleep*ing dumbass *bleep*head idiot for nothing!”
- Wallace
“I’m not an early bird or a night owl. I’m some sort of permanently exhausted pigeon.”
- Scott
Ramona: “That’s a pretty rock.”
Scott: “Gideon gave it to me.”
Gideon: “I threw it at you.”
Scott: “He’s been pretty nice.”
“I don’t like little flying bugs… because they’re little and can fly, and I don’t like that they can do that.”
- Young Neil
“I’m not an Aries. I’m just a raging *bleep.*”
- Julie
Stephen: “What was that?”
Roxy: “My shirt fell.”
Stephen: “It sounded a lot heavier than that.”
Kim, who immediately checks on her: “She was in it.”