Things DK and co. have probably said

Submissions always welcome!

[incorrectdkcquotes]

Diddy: What does "take out" mean?

DK: Food.

Candy: Dating.

Cranky: Murder.

Wrinkly: It can mean all three if you're not a coward.

[incorrectdkcquotes]

Candy: In your opinion, what is the height of stupidity?

Cranky, turning to DK: How tall are you?

[incorrectdkcquotes]

Tiny: Here's a fun Christmas idea. We hang mistletoe, but instead of kissing, you have to FIGHT whoever else is under it.

Diddy: Tiny, no.

Dixie: Mistlefoe.

Diddy: Please stop encouraging her.

[incorrectdkcquotes]

Diddy: What if I press the brake and gas at the same time?

Swanky: It takes a screenshot.

[incorrectdkcquotes]

K. Rool: If I'm really as evil you say I am, then may Tiki Tong strike me down where I stand!

*A flow of lava comes rushing quickly by, narrowly missing K. Rool.*

K. Rool: HA! Nice try, jackass! Next time, give it your A-game!

[tyjrose]

Thank u for following me, I offer u nothing

[incorrectdkcquotes]

*Swanky, carrying Kiddy under his arm, slams the door of DK's treehouse open to find DK, Funky and Diddy playing Uno.*

DK: Oh hey Swanky, we thought you were dead.

Diddy: Deal it again, Funky.

[incorrectdkcquotes]

Dixie: What's better than treats? Diddy: Dixie: Crabs.

[incorrectdkcquotes]

Diddy texting: DK there's a red zinger on the outside of the door, can you get rid of it?

Diddy: please hurry, I'm going to cry

Diddy: DK??

Diddy: DK

DK texting: DK is dead. You're next. Love, Zinger.

[incorrectdkcquotes]

Cranky, gesturing to a pile of money between him and DK: That money's for my old age!

DK: Old age? You don't leave fingerprints anymore!

Cranky: I'm in my twilight years.

DK: You're in the Twilight Zone.

[incorrectdkcquotes]

Cranky: What I'm about to tell you is the hardest thing I've ever had to say.

DK: I love you?

Cranky: No! Gotta save something for my deathbed.

[incorrectdkcquotes]

Bluster: Why is this all so... complicated?

Funky: I know I'm a broken record on this, but Mercury is in retrograde.

Bluster: Enough with the astrology.

Funky: Spoken like a two-faced f*cking gemini.

[incorrectdkcquotes]

Diddy: Step away from my uncle!!

K. Rool:

K. Rool: No.

Diddy: ...I wasn't prepared for that.

[incorrectdkcquotes]

Swanky: Do you think I could fit fifteen marshmallows in my mouth?

DK: You're a hazard to society.

Candy: And a coward, do twenty.

[incorrectdkcquotes]

Wrinkly: Kudgel has 19 bottles of dish soap. If---

Kritter: Wait, why does he have so many soaps?

Kudgel, in a fort built of soap bottles: MIND YO BUSINESS, KRITTER!

[incorrectdkcquotes]

*The five player Kongs find themselves in the final boss arena in DK64. They spot Cranky and Snide making their way to them.*

DK, being sarcastic in a cheerful way: Great! The gang's all here. Now we can die together.

[incorrectdkcquotes]

I want you all to know I DO read tags, and I look forward to them whenever I post a new quote. I don’t quite know if they follow me, but there’s someone who always has an ooc comment in their tags when they reblog a post and they get me every time.

I would similarly like to apologize to anyone taken aback by the fact my own characterizations of the characters (DK and Wrinkly being the Sane Men™ of the crew, nobody quite liking Bluster, etc) tends to leak into my decisions on who says what. It’s something I try to avoid but that happens at least every other quote.