inactive

[incorrectebfquotes]

Matt: Hrrrrnnggh Nolegs, I’m trying to sneak around but i’m dummy thicc and the clap from my ass cheeks keeps alerting the fascists

[incorrectebfquotes]

Lance: Failure is not an option.

Matt: Which is fine by me, because I do not intend to fail. I vow to do the opposite of fail.

Natalie: You mean succeed?

Matt: No, I will not succ-eed. No one will be sucking seed.

[incorrectebfquotes]

Lance, aiming his gun at a cat: Tell me the name of god you feline piece of shit.

Cat: Can you feel your heart burning? Can you feel the struggle within? The fear within me is beyond anything your soul can make. You cannot kill me in a way that matters.

Lance, cocking his gun, tears streaming down his face: I'M NOT FUCKING SCARED OF YOU!

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lance: [raising his arm to cover up the "s" in shoes so it says "hoes]

anna: lance stop you look like a nazi

[incorrectebfquotes]

matt: [on the phone] yo im here open up

lance: as a child i was forced to eat dog food for dinner-

matt: open the fuckin door

[incorrectebfquotes]

Natalie: Do you ever want to talk about your emotions, Lance?

Lance: No.

Matt: I do!

Natalie: I know, Matt.

Matt: I'm sad.

Natalie: I know, Matt.

[incorrectebfquotes]

Natalia: Arson is legal and it’s the only way to get to Heaven.

[incorrectebfquotes]

NoLegs: Don’t fuck with me! I have the power of God AND anime on my side!

[incorrectebfquotes]

Anna: Matt and I slept together.

Natalie: And?

Anna: I thought you would be a little more shocked.

Natalie: Oh, sorry.

Natalie, in a shocked voice: And?!

[incorrectebfquotes]

Annabelle: Whoa, you’re being a little-

Lancelot: OBSTREPEROUS? RECALCITRANT? TRUCULENT?

Annabelle: I was going to say “cray-cray.”

[incorrectebfquotes]

Annabelle: I pranked him to death, with a tire iron~! -w-

Dark Matt:

[incorrectebfquotes]

Lance: Please. Picking locks is my specialty.

Lance: *Throws a brick through a window*

Lance: Okay, let’s go!

Matt:

[incorrectebfquotes]

Dark Anna, reading a fortune cookie: "If you kill a killer, the number of killers in the world stays the same." Huh.

Dark Matt: Kill two.

[incorrectebfquotes]

Matteus: Annabelle’s at that very special age where she only has one thing on her mind.

Natalia: Boys?

Matteus: Homicide.

[incorrectebfquotes]

Matt: Wow Lance, you’re really handsome!

Lance: Don’t be jealous Matt, you’re handsome too.

Matt: I wasn’t being jealous, Lance, I was being gay.

[incorrectebfquotes]

Lance: Studies have shown that keeping an open ladder in a house is more dangerous than a loaded gun. That’s why I own ten guns. Just in case some maniac tries to sneak in a ladder!

[howlpendraig]

sword lesbian this, sword lesbian that, will anyone spare a thought for bow and arrow lesbians in these melee fighting times

[howlpendraig]

me (a lesbian) pulls out my bow, notches an arrow, winks at my lady love and says “the only thing straight about me is my shooting” before skewering the sheriff of nottingham 

[incorrectebfquotes]

-Anna, probably