Incorrect Gelphie

Weekly “Incorrect Gelphie Quotes” posts. Wicked musical/book related. I do not own any of the quotes.

[incorrectgelphiequotes]

Nessa: So, how’s motherhood treating you?

Elphaba: Good. I didn’t expect this much crying, though.

Nessa: Don’t worry, it’s normal for babies.

Elphaba: What? no, the baby is fine. I was talking about Glin.

Galinda, *sobbing from the nursery*: I LOVE YOU SO MUCH.

[incorrectgelphiequotes]

Galinda: Elphie, before you say no-

Elphaba: no.

Galinda: but you haven’t heard it yet.

Elphaba: i’m sticking with no.

[incorrectgelphiequotes]

Elphaba: *looking at Galinda*

Galinda:

Elphaba: stop being so cute or i’ll punch you in the lips

Elphaba: very softly

Elphaba: with my own lips.

[incorrectgelphiequotes]

Elphaba: Go fuck yourself.

Galinda: Fuck me yourself, you coward!

Elphaba: *already taking her clothes off* you asked for this.

Fiyero: This is the weirdest foreplay i’ve ever seen.

Nessa: NOT IN THE LIVING ROOM!!!

[incorrectgelphiequotes]

Elphaba: What are you doing up there?

Galinda: *sitting on a table* I pay rent and I can sit wherever I like in my own house, thanks.

Elphaba: Where’s the spider?

Galinda: It’s over by the door, can you please—

[incorrectgelphiequotes]

Galinda: Damn, girl, are you my appendix? Because I don't understand how you work but this pain in my stomach makes me want to take you out.

Elphaba:

Galinda:

Elphaba: Galinda.

Galinda: *crying in pain* yes?

Elphaba: G-galinda, do you really have appendicitis right now?

[incorrectgelphiequotes]

Galinda: It’s all fun and gay until you get a crush on her

[incorrectgelphiequotes]

Galinda: Two bestiiees! Chilling in a hot tub! Five feet apart ‘cause they’re not gay!

Elphaba: you’re my girlfriend

Galinda:

Elphaba: and you’re sitting on my lap right now

Galinda:

Elphaba: literally everything you just said was inaccurate

[incorrectgelphiequotes]

Galinda: the stars are so pretty tonight! I love them...

Elphaba: I like them too.

Galinda: Do you know what else I like?

Elphaba:

Galinda: Girls.

Elphaba:

Elphaba: Galinda, is there something you want t-

Galinda: Fun fact, did you know that you’re a girl?

[incorrectgelphiequotes]

Galinda: *crying*

Fiyero: What’s wrong?

Galinda: Elphie broke up with me.

Fiyero: What? Why?

Galinda: She said she didn’t want to be my girlfriend anymore.

Elphaba: *enters the room* BECAUSE I WANT TO BE YOUR WIFE! I WAS GOING TO PROPOSE BUT YOU DIDN’T LET ME FINISH

Galinda: Oh...

[incorrectgelphiequotes]

Galinda: Could you try and... figure out if Elphaba’s into girls?

Fiyero: Don’t worry, I got this.

[cups his hands around his mouth]

YO, ELPHABA, GALINDA WANTS TO KNOW IF YOU LIKE HER!

Galinda: F-FIYERO!?!

[incorrectgelphiequotes]

Elphaba: Could you try and... figure out if Galinda’s into girls?

Nessarose: Don’t worry, I got this.

[cups her hands around her mouth] YO, GALINDA, MY SISTER WANTS TO KNOW IF YOU LIKE HER!

Elphaba: N-NESSA?!

[incorrectgelphiequotes]

Elphaba: Why does everyone think I’m a lesbian?

Galinda, sitting on her lap while Elphaba’s running her hand through Galinda’s hair: probably it’s the clothes you wear.

Nessarose: *rolling her eyes* Yeah, it’s probably that... your clothes...

[incorrectgelphiequotes]

Elphaba: Galinda, there's this girl I like and I don’t know what to do.

Galinda: Just get near her and kiss her...

Elphaba: *Kisses Galinda*

Galinda:

Galinda: Not me, the girl you like, you dummie!

Elphaba: *Kisses her again*

Galinda: Are you deaf?!

[incorrectgelphiequotes]

hi! this isn't really a question but i love what you do. your blog is hilarious! thank you so much for creating these. i always love reading them because most of them seem like things the characters totally could have said XD fiyero is such a drama queen and i am here for it

Thank you so much for taking your time to write this sweet message! I always appreciate them 🥺🤧😍 It’s for people like you that motivates me to post here! So thank you so much!

PS: I’m sorry everybody for not posting lately, I’ll try to compensate you all!

[incorrectgelphiequotes]

Elphaba: I kissed Galinda.

Nessarose: Wow...

Nessarose: I owe Fiyero and Boq so much money.

[incorrectgelphiequotes]

Galinda: *cellphone rings*

Fiyero: *reading contact name* You still call your father “daddy”? That’s so childish.

Galinda: *answering phone* Hi, Elphaba.

Fiyero: *chokes on his drink*