Reb

☉♑︎ ☾♑︎ ↑♌︎ • 27. She/Her. ADHD. "I have a deeply hidden and inarticulate desire for something beyond the daily life.” • Astrology Blog: @informallyastro

[lallyloo]

[tilthat]

TIL there is no physical description of Jesus in the Bible.

via ift.tt

[volcel-official]

False

Luke 2:52

He’s larger than a baby

[amateuropinions]

By the description of him driving the moneylenders from the temple, we can also tell that he fit inside the temple, which gives us an upper bound as well as a lower bound on his size.

[veraxplus]

It’s been said that Jesus Christ was larger than a baby but smaller than a temple

[wetookanoath]

ryanbergara: Don’t you ever doubt my loyalty to my dude Paddington. #tbt

[greengravesgrow]

me pulling bread out of my backpack crumbs spilling everywhere: foolish foolish why did i not take care of this beforehand

children pointing at me and laughing loudly: bread crumbs bread crumbs bread crumbs bread crumbs bread crumbs

me crying emptying my backpack of bread crumbs: no please stop it

children laughing louder: BREAD CRUMBS BREAD CRUMBS BREAD CRUMBS

[makemadej]

“I’m not scared of you.”– Ryan Bergara

[kirianthedivorce]

Absolutely losing it at this Reddit post

And the update

She buttered Jorts

[anoonzee]

The outrage summed in a perfect Tweet:

[notemily]

FINALLY

I’ve been collecting the best Jorts tweets and waiting until the moment he showed up on my dash to post them. So here you are, the curated best of the past, oh, day or so:

[rhipidurafan]

Some additional quality memes from the past 24 hours:

Meanwhile, OP has continued tracking trash can mishaps on twitter:

And a quality photo of this sweet potato:

[rhipidurafan]

An update for those not following Jorts’ twitter account, starting with a transcription of the Wellerman cover:

Link to the lovely video

There once was a ship that put to sea The name of the ship was the Jorts and Jean The ship she rolled and her closet doors closed Oh no, where’s Jorts? Oh no!

Soon may the smarter cat come To save poor Jorts so orange and dumb One day when the butterin’s done We’ll take our leave and go

When Pam came on, she had a plan To teach our Jorts about garbage cans Pam meant well but her plans fell flat When HR said, “don’t butter the cat”

Soon may the smarter cat come To save poor Jorts so orange and dumb One day when the butterin’s done We’ll take our leave and go

Now Jean the smart cat comes She saves poor Jorts so orange and dumb Now that the butterin’s done We’ll take our leave and go

We’ll take our leave and go

We’ll take our leave and go

Additional quality memes:

A recipe for Buttered Jorts:

Recent Jorts activities:

And some very wise words from the cat himself:

[wtfzodiacsigns]

The Elements of the Signs

Fire Signs: When you touch fire or something hot you burn, but an exhilaration occurs afterward. Aries, Leo, and Sagittarius deal with love and emotion by: taking risks, experiencing the pain, then riding on the high of rebelling

Earth Signs: When you try to dig a hole for the right plant and finally find the right plant that fits; it grows into something beautiful. Taurus, Virgo, and Capricorn deal with love and emotion by:searching for the perfect piece, continuously struggling, then finding something beautiful that grows with you

Keep reading

[tikkety-tok]

Watching Olympics women's weightlifting 🏋️‍♀️

[themindbunker]

Your swagger, and your bearing, and the tight leotard you're wearing 💪 Strong role models for girls are my favorite 💪

[ourstrangeduet]

me: I dont wanna like…… do things……..

My psychologist: You have to, do things

me: 

[stevienick]

[star-maiden-deactivated20250806]

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Seize The Clay Studios (@seizetheclaystudios) on Nov 2, 2020 at 2:01pm PST

[shittymoviedetails]

In The Departed (2006), Matt Damon and Mark Wahlberg play two different characters— a subtle nod to them being two different actors, despite my wife being unable to tell them apart on the first viewing of the movie.

[dunsalien]

op this is the funniest post you’ve made yet

[bransonreese]

[notcaycepollard]

the twitter thread the artist created after this was one of the best situations i have ever seen in my whole life:

[serpentking456]

Somebody give this ignoramus a piece of actual shark skin and tell him to rub his face with it, let him find out just how “smooth” sharks really are.

[bransonreese]

Somebody did. I use it as a pillowcase because it’s so smooth.

[severepaperhideout-deactivated2]

But buddy.

Shark skin feels exactly like sandpaper. It is made up of tiny teeth-like structures called placoid scales, also known as dermal denticles. These scales point towards the tail and help to reduce friction from surrounding water when the shark swims. … In the opposite direction, it feels very rough like sandpaper.

((Here m8 https://www.floridamuseum.ufl.edu/fish/discover/sharks/basics ))

[bransonreese]

Buddy. It’s smooth. The link you sent me led to a website that described how smooth they are. I dunno, maybe you don’t know how to read?

[slangwang]

this post is transcendent

[world-heritage-posts]

world heritage post

[funnytwittertweets]

[normal-horoscopes]

Normal Horoscope:

Aries: You’ve got a hearty breakfast, a slingshot, a bag of cherries, and a bong shop in need of “improvement.“ Godspeed Aries.

Taurus: You can only drink so much coffee until you reach your resonant frequency and explode.

Gemini: Every child is a potential future enemy. Zero tolerance policy.

Cancer: Your mud smuggling operation has been discovered by the authorities. Flee the country with your ill-gotten gains.

Leo: Scientists and evil wizards have put aside their differences to present you with the sequel to tea.

Virgo: Things may get better eventually, but that doesn’t make today any less rough. We all make mistakes, we all get infected with parasites.

Libra: The future may be scary, but it can only hit you a day at a time. You have the home field advantage.

Scorpio: There are many problems that cannot be solved by longboarding but have you tried them all?

Ophiuchus: Need breeds creativity, creativity like trying to drink hot sauce like a smoothie.

Sagittarius: Certification is a thing of the past. What you need is spiritual harmony with the forklift.

Capricorn: It is quite the gift to be entertained just by watching a bug wander around. Some people need to consume media, all you need is a bug.

Aquarius: The key to any successful relationship is equally matched combat skill and constant dueling where neither one of you manages to win.

Pisces: Laugh while you can Pisces, in the future it will be heretical to “Live Blog“ your visions.

[informallyred]

things i do as someone with adhd that may not be adhd-related but sure as hell feel like it

saving containers (esp. glass or spray bottles) to "use later" (aka: try some random DIY with at an unspecified date)

keeping lists in 1000 places instead of one

having supplies for 80 different hobbies

redecorating my room as often as possible

reorganizing in the name of "efficiency" and constantly forgetting the new system I decided on

taking things my parents/friends were gonna throw out to "use for a DIY later"

subsequently having an array of random objects I haven't used

having started but unfinished projects all around me

being a paper packrat out of fear I'll forget something

not being able to find a specific paper bc there's just... so many

taking ~1-2 hours every month or so to name/organize all the screenshots from my computer

[hogwartsaheadcanon]

as soon as i figure out whether there’s any practical difference between ‘that’ and ‘which’ in a sentence, you’re all finished

[lytefoot]

“That” is if the clause specifies which one, “which” is if you’re giving extra information.

“She took the bag that contains the loot” means that she took one of several bags, in particular, the one that happens to contain the loot.

“She took the bag, which contains the loot” means that there’s only one bag you might be referring to, and that the fact that she took it is important because it contains the loot.

Also, there’s a comma before “which” but not before “that.”

[hogwartsaheadcanon]

you’re all finished