[airframeextender]

pants around my ankles. puke everywhere---in my hair, all over the front of my shirt, in the hair on my legs, on my underwear. drying on my glasses. get the vacuum out. stumbling, pissing myself, one shoe missing. fucking faded off that madam

[evilvillain123456789]

Held a sample of cloth I recieved from a foreign trader up to a candles flame to verify its material and check its quality, yet instead of burning or melting it remained inert, accepting the heat as iron might, and burned my hand quite badly

[sreegs]

i'm really thrilled about the resurgence of bad luck brian memes but when i tried to make one i sat there staring at the canvas like an apprentice surrounded by his master's work and i was unable to pick up the brush

[april]

[jmfenner91]

I recently got to do a poster for NYU Game Center. I had so much fun on this one. It was based on the game 'Immortality' - such a fascinating game!

[the-reconciliation-of-all-things]

[mclennonyaoi]

i love r/seattle subreddit . this is fucking crazy please read this please please please

[scavengedluxury]

This is what Wes Streeting wants for the NHS

[sealsdaily]

Today's Seal Is: Ragdoll Clipping

[sealsdaily]

Today's Seal Is: On Its Smoke Break

[paulfrankjuliusthemonkey]

@newporters

[evilvillain123456789]

yo yo wait that reminds me of something really funny i saw once, hold on--(you watch me open my phone browser and manually and correctly type the entire url of a specific tumblr post)

[yorickish-deactivated20240226]

ladyless knight who keeps pulling out his sword and holding it to his neck as a "joke" freaking out his squires and shit. sitting alone in his castle on a saturday night pounding flagon after flagon of mead then staring at the wall with his sword in his mouth crying for a few hours until he falls asleep

[yorickish-deactivated20240226]

longbowman sends out a bunch of couriers to his friends at 3 in the morning bearing the message "this time I'm gonna do it for real" and goes out to the field points his bow straight up in the air. fires an arrow up and just stands there waiting for it to come back down

[dkdsgns]

R.I.P.

[escuerzoresucitado]

[deirdreskye]

Rockabilly girl working the counter at the dispensary: that'll be 500 dollars for an eighth of OG Wizard Faggot and a Thanatos Systems Disposable Vape Pen. Would you like to sign up for our Enlightened Blazers' Rewards Program

Me getting so horny I deserve to be dissolved into a barrel of pig slop: yes please

Off duty cop decked out in master chief armor: you've been selected for a random security check, citizen. Please present your penis for inspection

[my-commc]

[homoidiotic]

Leslie Feinberg speech at the Al-Fatiha international retreat in Washington DC, 2002

read full speech transcript here

[niedopalek]

i jus be havin sex on the computer straight up lol (stalactite detaches from cave ceiling and impales me through the head) 

[latenightgasstationwalk]

Of course it goes without saying that I am hopelessly dependent on the ingot