“I saw your browser history.”
“Do you even know what you’re doing?”
“We’ve already tried this.”
“You don’t even know what you’re doing.”
“Beyonce isn’t that great.”
“How many times do I have to tell you?”
“I don’t even know who you are.”
“Didn’t your parents ever tell you that?”
“Is this where you live?”
“… Why are your hands down your pants?”
“You’re late on child support.”
“You never go ass to mouth.”
“One ring to rule them all…”
“He doesn’t even go here!”
“Did you just take that?”
“It’s your turn to do the dishes.”
“Were you going through my computer?!”
“You need to be honest with yourself, no one likes Nickelback.”
“I know you’re having an affair.”
“I can’t believe it’s over.”
“How high are you right now?”
“It’s not necessary to replace you, you’re not missed.”
“Why do you think we never worked out?”
“You’re the most ridiculous person I know.”
“Snoop Dog just came into the diner.”
“You said we could get a puppy.”
“You ordered a moon bounce?”
“Meeting your mother changed my life.”
“Do you want to get a drink sometime?”
“Your resilience is comparable to that of a cockroach.”
“I was on an episode of Cops once.”
“We’re alone out here, you know?”
“Why did you invite me to your wedding?”
“You’re the master of excuses.”
“Did you hire a stripper?”
“I just got out of jail.”
“I know you don’t want to be with me anymore.”
“You’ve been in that same exact spot since 9 this morning.”
“There’s plenty of fish in the sea.”
“I can’t believe it’s you.”
“I wrote you a letter… Every single day.”
“They’re going to kill me.”
“You had sex with a serial killer.”
“I didn’t love you anyways.”
“That was the worst day ever.”
“That was the best day ever.”
“Is this your first date?”
“I’ve never been kissed before.”
“I can’t see you anymore.”
“You’re better off without me.’
“I’m better off without you.”
“You’re like a freaking Taylor Swift song.”
“That’s the worst advice I’ve ever heard.”
“Well you don’t see that everyday.”
