Hello,

I give you a Plutonium. // 21

[bermudarhombus1]

In this house we believe in linear functions, like god intended. It's Adam + Eve, not Adam + Eve + higher order terms.

[invidere]

QM Lectures

[invidere]

Look: https://physics.weber.edu/schroeder/quantum/Schrodinger.pdf I am trying to understand the Schrodinger equation and I like this resource

[invidere]

Need to find a textbook on the basics of elementary particle physics

[invidere]

So much shame, it consumes me.

[invidere]

My symmetry and mechanics book came but I struggle to understand it. Lie Lee lieeeeeee theory groups stuff I don't know any of that. I think I best start at Goldstein. But still. What a glorious book, and it is in my arms now.

[invidere]

The most potent drug of all is Hope

[invidere]

Me and Fourier Analysis stuff this Tuesday. Stay tuned this exam will

[invidere]

People often talk about how they're not understood fundamentally but I resonate more with not understanding others. I feel that I am unable to comprehend the nuances of human emotion, experiences, and beliefs. I wonder if perhaps I am being careless and not attentive enough to others. Can this be helped?

I think part of the reason I don't have intimate relations is because I am incapable of this. It must be lonely being around me since I can't understand anyone. I can never say the right thing. This isn't to say I am always understood by other, but still.

I don't think I am able to share the inner world of others, I think I lack substance and intellect which means others won't be able to connect with me and vice versa. Don't know what to do about this

[invidere]

What I need is a dick up my ass but instead I have a stick

[invidere]

I am off antidepressants and my mood has been poor lately. I am sad, angry, resentful. So, the medication was not just a silly activity I indulged in... perhaps it did help my mood. but I don't want to be on medication for the rest of my life. I want my life to be better in a way that isn't merely pharmaceutically induced. Surely deep down I had these issues while on medication, it's only now I'm able to consider them clearly.

[invidere]

I might be getting a cat. Oh

[invidere]

Some nerd took 'Lagrangian' as their username Ok

[invidere]

I study physics now because anything else would make me kill myself but let's think about what I just said

[invidere]

I think I am a bit aggressive deep down and pushy but I force myself to be pleasant. I am anxious to say enough and the right thing but silence may suffice. I struggle with verbal communication and sometimes people talk and rather than actively listening, I admit I am more preoccupied with what to respond with. I needto talk slower. I often get tongue tied and if I were to speak slower, i would communicate better. I don't need to be pleasant. I don't need to communicate in a perfect manner and I don't need to be so uncomfortable with confrontation and being blunt about something someone said. I need to respect my thoughts and opinion enough to voice them the way I see them in my head.

[invidere]

Being in a family with a weird relationship with food is unfortunate for a range of reasons but the weirdest part is when you can't tell them you baked something or tried a new food because suddenly they want to categorize it as a good/healthy or junk/unhealthy food. I dont know. I had a pack of premade brownie mix in a pouch and i wanted to make myself brownies and when i told my dad this he said "Everyone here is dieting and eating healthily" (they're all on vacation back home). and I snapped at him and later ate my brownies but right now I'm sitting here crying wondering when things with food can be normal. Because when we tell people we cooked something we are sharing an experience, we aren't anticipating that they'll make a commentary on the Goodness of the food. The brownie was good and sweet indeed but it has been followed by a bitterness

[invidere]

Got told that attending a lecture on Semiconductors was core Me