–– I FALL APART !

you will COME OF AGE with our young nation; we'll bleed && FIGHT for you –– we'll make it right for you! if we lay a STRONG enough foundation, we'll pass it onto you, we'll give the WORLD to you, and you'll BLOW US ALL AWAY!

[inxffability]

yumi’s muse g –– LIAO YUBIN! ♡

how do i even explain u lol

was born in shenzhen, china, n her dad was the heir to one of the dirtiest empires in the whole of the country –– maybe even th world

they run brothels, casinos, n underground drug & fighting rings, w some of the filthiest money fr politicians, priests, even foreign dignitaries; yubin is basically #red light royalty

yubin nevr knew her mother, only tht she was one of her dad’s employees, and at one point it made no difference bc they all treated her like their daughter anyway!

was schooled by a governess her whole life bc her dad could afford it; deadass a Daddy’s Girl™ and adored being spoiled by him

didn’t have a lot of friends her age except for those she’d meet in her dad’s clubs whenevr he’d bring her along n they all taught her the tricks of the trade!!!

started drinking young, started smoking young, started fucking young, too

eventually her father wanted to expand his empire n thought hey why not start w seoul :~) so he gave yubin a plane ticket n left her in charge of their businesses in sk ... at the age of 16 ... Who Does That ™

but hey at least it gets yubin ca$h so yk

but when she got here a few months in she realized that this was Boring™ bc she did no work of her own n all she did was lounge around

so she decided what the hell n became a stripper herself

shes streetsmart, booksmart, sarcastic, Sinful As Hell

likes 2 smoke n drink n makeout w everyone, would hav a threesome, would hav a poly relationship

a dom / bratty sub most of the time 

pretends not 2 fall in lov but is lowkey soft bye

genuinely enjoys life idk someone break her ig

[inxffability]

naeun !

“alcohol is alcohol.” he decides to concur, taking a drink of his own to match hers with a loose smile tugging at his features. it’s close to common knowledge how much shin jaehyun falls below his standards –– but shinwon digresses for the time being; his company for the night more than makes up for the ill feeling he has towards taeil’s brother. “what, am i not trustworthy enough, darling? rude.” he feigns a pout, looking down at naeun with a sly twinkle in his eyes to accompany the grin that plays at the corners of his mouth. “but fair enough, i suppose. but at the very least you’ll tell me if your resolutions come through, yeah––?” he’s suddenly, painfully aware of how close their faces are, the glance pulled towards her lips lingering for a second too long before he’s clearing his throat, another sip of his drink concealing the warmth that creeps in across his skin. ( resolution number one: stop looking at your best friend like that. )

[inxffability]

taemin !

when she feels his hand palming at familiar territory she’s all too quick to reciprocate, manicured fingers skimming their way under his shirt across toned flesh. “’mm, that depends; is it working?” saerom responds with a coy smile, taking in a deep breath as he retrieves the joint from her own hand, light giggles escaping from parted lips. “i do like the sound of that, though, oppa.” she speaks with a dreamlike glow, gaze heavily lidded from both adrenaline and whatever else seems to be coursing through her veins; taemin’s a form of art she can never get enough of, after all. “i’ve been so hungry since this afternoon, just thinking about you made me so– ah.” she’s murmuring into his ear now, the hand under his shirt tracing patterns into his waist as it falls lower, lower–– “but like you said, you don’t want anything until midniiight!” and as quickly as her hand retracts, more lithe giggles leave saerom’s mouth once more, offering the other a wink as she takes the joint back into her hands and takes a drag of her own. “though you know i’d be more than happy to give you a sneak peek of what’s to come ... wouldn’t you love to give all these people a good show?” it’s a joke –– well, for the most part, it is, but with the way saerom’s eyes are practically gleaming with mischief, she can’t exactly be too sure.

[inxffability]

yumi’s muse f –– bang junseo! ♡ ( tw: suicide attempt, self hate, bullying, insomnia )

bang junseo; 21 years old; choreographer

junnie was born in busan! his mom died giving birth to him, so grandma stayed at home, and dad was rlly busy working like three jobs, so he never really had time to Bond™ yk ..

was always a quiet kid like ,, v shy n v reserved but 

when he was nine he went to his first concert and was like damn ,, i wanna do this 4 the rest of my life

so began his dream of becoming an idol !! and he started workin hard at his dancing, esp, bc he found tht he was particularly amaZING at it

but like ,, considering the fact tht he was v soft n v quiet ppl didnt take his dream seriously

he started getting bullied at the age of 9 and when he was 11 it was a regular occurrence for him to come home with like black eyes and bruised knees

but he never stopped trying to be the best he could be, always striving for perfection when it came to his dancing most of all ( not to say the bullying didnt affect him ,... his self-esteem is nowhere 2 b found, always )

he wouldnt sleep most nights , just keep going over his routines countless times just so he could, yk . Be The Best ™ it was unhealthy but a dream’s a dream, ig

when he was 14 he went to an audition n they were Shookt by his talent so he was onboard!! and he couldnt believ he was a step closer to his dream!!

here he met ! the kard group plot ppl ! bc yk eventually they were supposed to debut together n he was meant to be lead/main dancer bc #talent 

they wer the first friends he ever had bec junseo was always .. picked on n never had ppl on his side so now he had #friends n it was nice he lovs them so much hed protect them all if he could only protect himself and they mean so much to him

his other specialty was rap !! which came as a shock bc .. so soft .. so gentle .. but this boy could Spit Fire™ !!!

but he never stopped training, never stopped pushing himself, never slept; debuting was his dreAM ok 

but guess what

the group debuted n ended right away :^)

all his dreams, all th sleepless nights, it all just crashed n burned down

the night he finds out the groups over he slits his wrists inside his dorm’s bathroom

someone found him before it was too late n brought him to the hospital ,, n so the entertainment company thought it best for him nOt to debut in any other group ,, anymore ,, so guess who didnt d*e and isnt even a trainee anymore ,,

but the company was like hey ur still . talented we could use u around

so now hes a choreographer!! and one of the most sought out in the company honestmeme

is kind, is sweet. an Actual Mom ™ towards evryone tbh and like his moves scream Sex Appeal but as soon as the music’s off the idea of sex still horrifies him, pls , Leave

still hates himself ,, still doesn’t sleep; diagnosed with insomnia

lowkey resents idols who are successful and debuted bc this was His dream and its been taken from him but rlly he just highkey hates himself ,,

still self harms but catch his ass denying it, always

Sad ! but on the inside !

needs to be protected from himself but it’s not like he’ll admit it lol

[inxffability]

alice !

women –– girls like alice are about as rare and sweet as cherry wine; and changsuk had always loathed the way that very alcohol burned against his throat like a death wish. “any place with you in it is a pigsty.” he responds, curt, clipped; when it comes to alice, words are only a catalyst for the mayhem that routinely unfolds, lips on lips and nails on skin. he can still feel traces of her lingering against his flesh; his heart’d pound, if he let it. “find a toy of yours for tonight, that broad over there already asked me to take her home and show her a good time.” ( which meant a back alley someplace, likely, but he ignores that much. ) the idea of personal space is a concept abandoned, changsuk stooping down to her height so their faces are breaths away. “and guess what, babe? she already made her move.” it’s a flat out lie –– but nothing’s more amusing to the older than pushing the girl’s buttons, smug smirk ever present on his features as he gives alice another once-over. “what’s yours?”

[inxffability]

sienna !

when she pulls him closer it’s like all his senses catch on overdrive; something about sienna makes him gravitate towards her without a second thought, hyunseok’s smile growing wider, warmer, almost on instinct. “whoa, someone’s excited.” the boy laughs, though concern prods at the back of his mind as he stares down at her inebriated form –– but all previous thoughts manage to evaporate at the sound of her giggle, his heart finding itself squeezed and undone all at the same time. “no, no–– i wanted to!” he exclaims, shaking his head with a chuckle ––– before pink seizes at his cheeks, the warm flush creeping over him at the same time sienna’s own features glow like twin bulbs. “no! oh, god, no–– i, i mean––” as he trips over his words, clumsy, stupid, the boy can’t help but regret the fact that he was stone cold sober in that very moment. “–– it’s not from the store ... but i do think you’ll like it. at least, i hope you do!” his eyes fold into his cheeks as expression brightens up, once more, and hyunseok takes advantage of their interlocked fingers to drag her along as he begins walking. “c’mon; rooftop’s this way!”

[inxffability]

bora !

things like academics come easy to the boy –– because yes, okay, he’s a bright one when it comes to things like textbooks and essays and numbers. real life scenarios aren’t always as favorable, though ( which is where the adderall kicks in –– but joowon digresses ). “i can do it without either of us getting trouble! that’s the best part of it all.” nods the taller male emphatically, slow smile curling around his features as he grows less hesitant in approach; the school system had never really bothered to upgrade its system, even months after joowon’d, well –– broken it. “the offer always stands –– especially for you, y’know!”

[inxffability]

the party’s already in full swing, and it’s more than mere adrenaline coursing through her veins, now; excitement is near palpable in the air, and saerom wouldn’t have it any other way –– when she spots the older male in her peripheral her smile only grows wider, and the political science major practically floats her way towards taemin with ease ( it’s most likely the drugs taking their effect, but sae’d always been fond of walking on the clouds, after all ). “lovey!” saerom purrs, already draping an arm around the other’s waist with a content hum and soft giggles. her free hand plays with the joint dangled from her fingers, and without faltering she puts it to her lips and inhales, the smoke that follows causing her to look up in awe. “hmm––” begins the girl thoughtfully, already toying with the hem of taemin’s shirt with a small smile. “as great as joints and beer bottles are, i’d like my lips around other things tonight if you catch my drift, sunny –– wouldn’t you say the same?” // @celvstials​ !

[cvstellandum-blog]

          A SAD sight for sore eyes was all bora was tonight. she didn’t want to be here and had somehow still managed to find herself getting dragged out of the comfort of the house whilst almost falling asleep over her textbooks. she was currently seated in a corner by herself, a notebook in her lap as she leaned over it in the dimly lit room, trying to make out her own notes she had just scribbled down. 5 classes took its toll, not to mention time that the girl did not have. «do you think i can write this essay… drunk?» she asked the person approaching her, frustration evident in her tired eyes.

[inxffability]

he's one of the few people who’s remained sober throughout the party, funnily enough; joowon had never liked the idea of losing control of his own thoughts, and avoiding alcohol was a surefire way of doing just that. when he spots the other hunched over what appears to be coursework he can’t help but sidle towards her, expression reading a mild concern before an inevitable chuckle escapes his lips at the other’s words. “i wouldn’t suggest it, but hey –– free country, isn’t it?” joowon tries for a helpful smile before taking his own seat beside bora, peering over the work for himself. “i’m sure you can do it, though! and if not, well ...” he offers the girl a slow rise and fall of his shoulders, smile more careful than it had been prior. “i can always .. help you out? if you’d like!”

[inxffability]

truth be told, parties didn’t exactly enthrall him; people in general were sickening, at least, but hyunseok had dragged him along ( as hyunseok did, naturally ), and the idea to get black out drunk was too tempting an offer to pass on. the sight of the younger girl amidst the crowd, however, brings a cocky smirk to parted lips, and changsuk raises his nth beer bottle of the night to his mouth, finishing it off as he strides over to alice with impassive features –– save the hunger that glints in his gaze. “well.” he begins, dry tone complementing the thinness of his smile, the indifferent tilt of his head. “and here i thought this party couldn’t get any worse; clearly, jaehyun doesn’t have any standards when it comes to guests.” just the sight of the other stirs something in him that causes his blood to burn with something he can’t just put his finger on –– and while he speaks as if brushing her off, the way his eyes linger of the frame he’s come to memorize over nights and days rings with a different story altogether. // @celvstials​ !

[inxffability]

“–– sorry, what did you say?” eyebrows knit together in mild bemusement, but the smile on chaerin’s face remains ever present as she giggles through her hiccups, the drink already taking a toll on her –– she’d never been one for drinking, seeing as back in daegu she’d never exactly had the opportunity to; being in seoul only proved all the more how much the ballerina wasn’t cut out for the lifestyle –– though she figured it’d be alright, so long as she had eunah by her side. “m’having fun.” words are barely audible over the booming music, the chatter of the crowd – but chaerin finds herself giggling still, swaying herself and the girl in front of her back in forth in a shaky ‘dance’ of sorts. “are you having –– hic! –– a good time? good idea to bring me here, ah, thank you for bringing me here, i mean ... do you want another drink? i think i could–– hic! –– get us another!” // @svnderisms​ !

[inxffability]

“hey!” the enthusiasm in his tone is one so pathetically concealed, as if he doesn’t even bother hiding it; when he offers the other a smile, it exudes the utmost genuineness, eyes folding into crescent moons hyunseok’s come to reserve for those he’s most fond of –– and sienna’s proven to be atop that list without fail. “jae told me you’d be around, so, y’know, i thought i’d fine you and say hi! i hope you’re having a great time!” hopefulness lingers in his tone, and he outstretches his hand in the girl’s direction, excitement coursing through his veins. people failed to entrance him like sienna always did, after all. “are you busy, right now? i– i wanted to give you a belated christmas gift! ... if, if that’s okay with you, of course!” // @celvstials​ !

[inxffability]

“the kiddie pool was a cute touch –– reminiscent of frat parties, if anything, but that’s to be expected from the other shin, isn’t it?” there’s a bare glance over at the beer-abundant body of water, another swig of his own drink accompanying the amusing glint that hides behind heavily-lidded irises. when shinwon’s gaze returns toward the girl at his side he can’t deny the way it lingers if only slightly, features growing uncharacteristically softer ( though he wouldn’t dare to admit it aloud ). “you look like you’re enjoying yourself, though.” the smile widens into an ever more genuine grin, raising his own bottle to naeun in an indication of cheers. “any new year’s resolutions planned out, naeunnie?” // @svnderisms​ !

[inxffability]

yumi’s muse e –– JUNG JOOWON! ♡ ( tw: murder; drug addiction )

joowon was born in the bronx to a single mom bc his dad passed away before he was born 

so it was rlly his mom looking out for the two of them!!! he lovd her more than anything in this life hnstyl

he was also?? a genius?? 

like he could hack into anything and hed been tinkering with a laptop since the day his mom got him one n so he rlly knew his way around a computer

when he was 16 he got into some deep shit bc he accidentally hacked into a real back door black market sorta thing n it got the attention of the big boss of the mafia ,,, yIKe ™

n they were lik yooo .. kid u kno too much we gotta kill u but also ..,. ur smart n we could use ur skills

so in the end they were like hey no u can come work for us 

and just so he'd comply they showed him that they were following his mom around n tht hecka scared him into doing it !

so he was working for them for a while n to cope w the stress n the workload he starts taking adderall n it becomes an addiction for him and the stress p much gets to him

n finally he snaps when he sees a man literally muRDERED in front of him

n hes like um ? ? ? / / //? im not dOING this shit anymore so he purposely tanks a mission n guess wht 

they kill :^) his mom :^)

when he hears the big bo$$ is comin after him too he dyes his hair grey , books a flight to korea with all the money in his savings , n never looks back !

so nOw hes an electrical engineering student n hes kind of chill and always smiley and trying to see the positive in people 

he sometimes hacks the school records and alters grades for people whod pay him to do it tbh 

but on the low he's still .... an adderall addict ........ n paranoid ...... n a Mess ™ hnst

protect

[inxffability]

yumi’s muse e –– NAE HYUNSEOK! ♡

puppy

born in the USA to a good, functioning family!! has two younger siblings tht are twin boys!! its a Good Thing™ they got goin on over there

his english name is hunter and for a while he went by that!

hes p much an Average Joe™ lik ,, his hometown is in the middle of nowhere n he got p ok grades and hes kind of just like . [hand gestures] yk??

for a while he’s p much just living the good life until he realizes hes, get this ,

Bored™

so the day after his 18th he packs up n just up and out and leaves, just like that!

at first he just goes out of state like . with all the money hes got in his savings acct he travels across the country in his dingy old car until he gets bored of tht too

so hes like fuq it all

n moves to korea ! 

but as soon as he gets to seoul n gets his own apartment he finds out hes p piss broke : / n his parents wont give him any money : / yike

so he put up a roommate ad ( see lucky winner changsuk ) n got a job at this sex toy shop tho he is still 11 n giggles at the sound of the word “sex”

this is going in no direction bec he, too, is going in no direction

lit has no plan for his life? ever? 

the chillest 21 year old u will ever meet, it lit doesnt get any chiller than him

likes puns n puppers n pizza n dumb mainstream trap

hes bored™ most of the time tho so if u dont impress him he will lit . jump ship

but hes so sweet lisn ,., hes hnstly just a “good guy” doesnt drink or smoke or do drugs or w/e

easily trusting . easily falls in love . easily gullible . yike

protect him ! but also take him out idk corrupt him

[inxffability]

yumi’s muse d –– GAN CHAERIN! ♡ ( tw: abuse; homophobia; eating disorder )

grew up in daegu to a traditional family like . bible thumper mom and preacher dad and big sister who was the Star™, yk

a pretty much ,, average kid?? timid n soft n ladylike, just how the church wanted her to be, except alwAYS second place to her sister in everything .. it’s not like chae really minded, tho, bc she was always more than comfortable staying out of the spotlight

kind of quiet, kind of a loner . except for her best friend who lived across the street! eunha was ( and is ) everything to her, chae would set herself on fire just to keep her warm, she fel in lov with eunha in perhaps the most platonic(?) way possible.

was good at history and social sciences and subjects like that!! lowkey dabbled in ballet dancing too n shes hecka good at it, lsn

she was even better than her sister!! which her sister was . lowkey, highkey bitter about

speaking of dancing she had her first relationship at 13 with this girl in her ballet class like 3 years her senior!! they started off having this sort of role model relationship but it turned out chae ended up in lov with her and vice versa!!

except she had to keep it from her parents who were . ofc v conservative and homophobic and all that jazz

but her siSTER who was a snake n just wanted to Be On Top™ always . found out abt it n exposedt chae and her gf to!! her famILY 

as expected her father and mother were very angered n disappointed and decided the best way to handle this would be to beat the gay out of her so she was physically abused and hit and battered by her own preacher father while her sister looked on with delight :^(

one night her father shakes her awake and tries to rape her in order to show her what a real woman’s duty is and out of fear for her own life she runs to eunha and her hideaway where a bruised and battered chaerin announces her plan to run away to seoul

turns out eunha comes with her! and so these two come to the city and haven’t looked back since

chae is a ballet dancer now; still soft n timid but is generally a v sweet person ,, a Smol™

rn she’s striving to be the best ballet dancer she can be !! which includes .. skipping meals and purging out any food she comes across, yikes

but really she’s just . a sweet and quiet person , always tries to be the best for everyone, except sometimes she’s fragile as hell and will probably explode . a time bomb, if u will

protect! her!

[inxffability]

yumi’s muse c –– KIM CHANGSUK! ♡ ( tw: abuse; death )

changsuk is 21 n he's a seoul boy born and raised 

his family was made up of frustrated, abusive athletes and the only person he really looked after and loved was his youngest sister!!! 

there were 8 siblings and chang was eldest and his sister was the 7th and so these two were the most inseparable!!! 

she was the only one in the family who couldn't do sports bc she had cerebral palsy and while the rest of his family looked at her as an abomination he adored her and took to her every whim and it was basically them against the world!!!

in high school he was already working double shifts wherever he could just to pay for her medicine and so he could rlly just help her out 

literally would take any sort of blue collar job tbh and be paid in measly fees but anythin for his sis ok

but one night he comes home to police sirens around his house and an ambulance wheeling in a body and his sister was killed in a house fire bc somebody had tossed a bottle of alcohol into an open flame :///

angry and heartbroken he packs his bags and leaves his family behind and moves to the more high class parts of seoul n ends up dorming with this dumbass named hyunseok ( muse e! stay tuned )

now they both work in this sex toy shop and when hes not doin anything sometimes changsuk writes poetry in memory of his sister?? always grieving, never knows what to do with it

changsuk seems p kind like . he’s the type to be sarcastic but not in the way that pushes others away he’s just always been v . dry with his wit

but he never lets people too close because he doesn’t like establishing close relationships with people anymore!

closest thing he has to a friend is hyunseok, probably,

protect him if u wanna try , i guess